Hunted (Kylo Ren x OC)
by yddraig318
Summary: As a young boy, Kylo Ren trained with his uncle Luke Skywalker as a padawan. Serela has grown up her entire life on the lush, wild planet of Takodana. Both are ignorant of the prophecy which bonds both of their fates together inextricably, and that the fate of the galaxy hinges upon the two of them. He hopes to find her and change her. The question is: who will change who?
1. I The Vision

A small boy, no older than 8 ascended the stone steps towards the temple, his mop of messy brown hair bouncing with each one. He was panting with the effort of taking the stairs quickly, in such a rush to find his uncle and complete the task he'd been given. It was a clear, sunny day under a blue sky and Ben Solo was looking for his uncle to return something at the instruction of his mother. The problem was his uncle was proving very difficult for a little boy to find.

"Uncle Luke?" he called, looking out towards the see over the ramparts of the temple walls. The other young padawans were enjoying their daily free time. Many of them were down in the courtyard below, practicing dueling with the wooden sticks they used in the absence of their Master. Others were likely down in the kitchen eating, and some might have also been down at the beach taking advantage of the free time to have a swim.

Ben Solo however, was trying, and failing, to find his uncle.

"UNCLE LUKE?" he called out in exasperation, climbing the last set of stairs to the topmost level of the Jedi temple.

Upon cresting the final step he turned and found his uncle sitting crosslegged on the stone floor, his eyes closed and his familiar mechanical hand, as well as his remaining flesh and bone one, were resting on his knees as the wind up at this higher altitude swept through lightly and tousled his graying hair.

"Uncle Luke?" Ben spoke softer this time.

Luke Skywalker opened one eyes warily and looked at his nephew. Though Ben would never have guessed it, Luke had sought refuge and meditation in this place specifically with the aim of consulting with the Force about his nephew. The temperament that had begun to display itself at odd moments was becoming disconcerting to him, and he had needed the time to be alone with his thoughts on the matter.

"Come Ben, sit here," Luke told him, patting the stones next to where he was sitting.

Ben looked from his uncle's face to the floor, then obeyed. Sitting down and crossing his legs, Ben rested his hands on his knees and closed his eyes, trying to feign calm when he was anxious to deliver the parcel he'd been sent with. Luke sensed this in his young padawan, and spoke to the matter directly, "What troubles you Ben?"

Startled, Ben opened his eyes to look at his uncle gazing calmly back at him, "What do you mean uncle Luke?"

 _I can see your frustration young padawan, it calls out to me through the Force_ Ben heard the whispered voice through his head, something his uncle had never done before.

This both excited and angered him. Excited, because he liked the idea that he might be able to read other people's thoughts, to know what they really thought about him and his lineage, his talents and progress. But it angered him too at the notion that someone could peer into his mind at will and discover anything they might like to know. There were places, even in an 8 year old's mind, where dark, unswept corners had begun to fester and grow, threatening to reach out and sully the other parts. Ben did not want anyone to see this, and so in an attempt to distract his uncle, he answered, "Nothing is wrong, my mother just wanted me to give you this."

Ben handed the package to him, hiding the tremble in his hands at the anger from having his mind invaded, even if only by his uncle.

Luke sensed this too, and it worried him, but he put the thought in a box and tucked it away for the moment, another thing to ponder later as he consulted the Force about his nephew's future.

"What is it?" he asked teasingly, reassuming the role of good-natured uncle.

Relief clouded Ben's face that his uncle had not pursued the subject, "Open it," he said with a smile.

He watched his uncle undo the wrapping and pull out a new set of robes from Leia.

"Ah," Luke said, "Your mother has been pestering me to buy some new robes for awhile now."

Ben twitched slightly at the mention of his mother _pestering_ anyone. He didn't like anyone thinking they had the right to talk about her like that, even her own brother. A shadow seemed to cross over his face but it was gone just as soon as it had appeared, and he forced the familiar smile.

"No note?" Luke asked, sensing the momentary increase in Ben's heartbeat and looking to his face for answers.

The smile he met with was extremely convincing though.

"No note, she said to tell you not to show up to our house in those old ragged things again."

Luke chuckled, "That does sound like your mother."

Ben looked away to the doorway, relieved to be released from the conversation, but Luke noticed the way his nephew's eyes gravitated towards the exit, and he pressed on.

"Ben, I want you to meditate with me."

"Right now?" Ben quipped, surprised and uninterested in the notion when all the other padawans were enjoying their free time.

"It won't take long, I want to try something new with you I've never tried with anyone before," Luke's eyes crinkled up in a small smile, "It will be like a game almost."

Now Ben was intrigued, and his curiosity got the better of him as he found himself saying, "Okay."

They both reassumed their rigid meditation poses, but this time Luke reached over and placed the palm of his remaining hand on top of his nephew's.

Uncomfortable, but unwilling to admit it, Ben tried to quiet his thoughts and delve into the place inside himself that his uncle had long ago taught him to find. It was as if he felt another presence there too though, and he sensed his uncle both physically next to him and wound around his psyche in that moment, their spirits seeking out the force together as one unit. In their meditation, this time visions began to take shape, which was new for Ben.

 _Does this happen often?_ he found himself asking.

 _Sometimes_ his uncle replied, _When the Force has something extremely important to show us._

Satisfied with the answer, Ben concentrated harder on witnessing the vision at hand.

An infant, with red-cheeks and chubby legs, lay in a basket beside a woman hanging clothes to dry out in the middle of a forest. The woman was beautiful to be sure, and she looked down at her child so lovingly, cooing and singing strange, sad songs of a time long past. A man appeared behind her, wearing a uniform of some importance, though Ben didn't know what. The baby gurgled as both looked down at it, the man kissing the woman on her shoulder, "She looks just like you," he said.

Another scene, the baby had now grown into a small girl, barely older than 3, but she dangled on her mother's knee and playing clapping games while her mother's animated face laughed and held her close to her. The little girl wore a short sleeve dress and from the corner of his eye Ben noticed a small brown birthmark on her right shoulder, almost in the shape of a crescent moon.

The scene dissolved and showed her now much older, a young woman, as beautiful as her mother and now taking her turn hanging clothes out to dry. The house looked shabbier than in the first vision, but the thatched roof and stone walls stood firm, a small tendril of smoke escaping from the chimney.

The last vision was the most perplexing, the same girl, now a bit older, but not much, round with child and holding her stomach to her, cradling and rubbing the bump with a smile.

 _This will all come to pass_ a voice totally unfamiliar to Ben resonated in his eyes, terrifying him, _you now know the girl's face. It is up to you to find her. Together you will finally bring balance to the Force young Solo._

The terror that seized Ben broke his concentration and his found himself back in the tower, eyes wide open and looking over to his uncle for answers. Luke could only stare back at his nephew with a look of mixed confusion and surprise.

"What does it mean?" Ben asked frantically.

Luke shook his head, "Your guess is as good as mine young padawan, but I'm sure that in time, the Force will reveal itself to you and you will find the answer to the riddle it has placed before you."

 _Author's Note: So their paths probably won't cross until chapter 6 or 7, but hang in there with me please! I wanted to make sure I do a good job setting up the story line._


	2. II The Girl

The green of the forest rustled around her comfortingly as Serela sat in her favourite part of the forest deep in meditation. Shafts of sunlight filtered down through the leafy layers of the tree tops overhead, casting light that seemed to dance all around her as the branches swayed in the breeze. Here, in the shadow of one of the ancient trees, her special rock sat, the moss on it's surface thick and green. Roots longer than her whole body sprung out from the tree's base and plunged into the dirt, creating tangled webs in their varying lengths and thickness. As a child she'd played within the roots, hiding from her friends during games and enjoying the damp smell of ancient dirt as she burrowed into the recesses of the tree.

With eyes closed, she breathed deeply of the forest air, so clean and pure, and she listened closely, as her mother had taught her to do. The chattering of animals overhead and underfoot, the sound of the nearby creek babbling along the rocks, the shifting of hundreds of years worth of unswept leaves in the wind all seemed to call out to her in her reverie, and yet she heard these sounds, but did not pay them any mind. She pushed past the noise, peaceful as it was, and strove to tap into her centre, the reserve of power deep within herself that she'd been taught to listen to and nourish almost from the time she could walk. Some of her first memories consisted of this: her sitting next to her mother, legs crossed and arms resting on her thighs as they both worked to delve within themselves and drink from the reservoir of emotions and strength that seemed to Serela as if it ran through her very veins.

Nearby, a bird was chirping in it's nest to wake it's hatchlings with the food it had retrieved. If she had opened her eyes and looked up, Serela could have barely managed to see a small brown spot in the trees where the small family was nestled. As she was in this state though, she could see perfectly into the nest in perfect details, count the chicks and even see the intricate detail that the mother bird had put into the home she had built.

Her subconscious rose from there, gliding up through the tops of the trees where she could look out over the vast expanse of forest that encompassed so much of Takadona. Here in the Western Reaches of the galaxy, many viewed Takadona as a primitive planet, full of feral pioneers trying to eke out a meager living in the majority of the planet's forestland. With the exception of Andui and the castle of Maz Kanata, there was not much to distinguish one corner of the planet from another.

A twig snapped loudly, breaking Serela's concentration, and she turned her head so fast towards the noise that her neck cracked. Groaning softly, she rolled her head around the loosen it after so long spent sitting in one position, and she stood, gathering her bow and arrow from the nearest moss-covered rock. Slipping quietly between the roots, she rested in the tree's base, her wild eyes watching for signs of life large enough to have made the noise. Even from the moment she was born, her mother told her, people had all gasped when they'd seen her eyes. Green in the center, with a ring of blue around it and a further hazel ring around that, they appeared like an island in the middle of a sea, although Serela had never seen a body of water so large as what her mother described, she thought it sounded like a beautiful metaphor.

Within moments of securing her hiding place, her patience was rewarded. A small eopie stepped out from amongst a clump of smaller trees, it's long tongue darting out to crunch on a low-hanging branch and eat it's leaves. Serela watched it with a look of determination. This had been her other reason for coming out to her favourite place, wildlife was more likely to roam out here further from her homestead and village.

Crouching down, she reached to her quiver and pulled out an arrow slowly, watching the eopie's furry neck shake as it swallowed a mouthful of leaves. They had been imported to Takadona from Tatooine generations ago by the old settlers, an after hundreds of years they had evolved from their desert climate bodies into ones covered in fur, with longer necks and stronger backs even, lending them to domestication and in cases when one could find a wild specimen, dinner.

She had strung her arrow and was aiming it for the animal's neck, trying to make it a quick death by shooting for the major artery, but just as she was about to loose her arrow, something spooked the beast.

It's head turned sharply to the East, body stiff as a board for only a moment before it took off back through the trees.

Serela shot off, barreling out from the roots in pursuit of the best meal she and her mother would be able to have for months. Her feet pounded gracefully on the rocks as she hopped from boulder to boulder, before reaching the trees where she'd last seen the animal and careening through them, desperate not to lose sight of it again.

Up ahead, she could see it's clumsy waddling feet, surprisingly fast for such a lumbering creature. Following as softly but as quickly as she could, she chased it through a small glen of ferns, jumping over the odd log that had fallen and dodging a low hanging vine.

When at last she had gained enough ground that she thought she had it, she paused, pulled out her bow and in one movement strung and loosed it in the direction of the eopie. Her arrow flew true, striking the poor beast in one of it's haunches, and slowing it's rampage through the forest, but the time she had taken to stop and shoot the arrow had let it get further ahead, and she saw it clear through another patch of trees and disappear from view.

Panicked, she resumed her frantic pace, trying to close the distance before her chance at such a huge piece of meat was lost forever.

When she finally cleared through the same brush the eopie had escaped into, she found herself in a large open area which ended with a cliff, it's edge overlooking the tall mountains and narrow blue lakes glittering so far below.

The eopie had collapsed there in the clearing, it's labored breathing ragged and pitiful as it's head drooped to the ground, blood pouring out from the wound on it's side.

A feeling of great pity overcame Serela as it always did when the time came to kill a creature, even if it was necessary for her survival. With great tenderness, she bent down to the animal's head and stroked it's neck, clicking her tongue and whispering in low tones to sooth the beast before his own demise. It seemed to calm him, and so unaware was he of anything but the presence of this human and the pain in it's side, it gave no notice to the glint of steel as she unsheathed her knife and made one quick slash at the base of it's neck, causing him to bleed out in seconds.

Serela watched the light leave his eyes and closed her own, her hand on the body, feeling his life energy slowly sapped away. What felt hot only moments before in her mind rapidly cooled to warm and then finally to cold. She turned her head east to look out over the cliff. Far off in the distance she could see the structures of Andui, and she knew if she continued heading north it would only be a matter of time before she came upon the large lake that bordered the land encompassing the castle of Maz Kanata. Stepping to the cliff's edge she looked down and saw nothing but rocks below, their ragged edges looking up at her menacingly as if daring her to jump.

Shuddering, she stepped away from the edge, and glanced around looking for something she could fashion into a makeshift stretcher to cart this huge beast home. With a sigh, she set to work cutting down branches and unwrapping her rope from around her waist. It took an hour or so, but she told herself that was a small price for the amount of meat this animal would provide.

If only she had taken into account how heavy it was.

With great effort, she attempted to pulled the stretcher behind her, and discovered to her great dismay that the animal would not budge, it's dead weight proving too much for her small frame and stature to manage. Undeterred, she attempted to push from behind, hoping that if she could at least get it through the initial clump of trees it had previously disappeared into then it might make easier going the rest of the way. She attempted it, but with no luck.

A great sigh escaped her, she had caught such a huge animal and had not had the forethought to consider how she might actually retrieve the carcass and return home with it before dark. Even now the sun was beginning it's careful descent and the familiar shade of coming nighttime began to darken the woods.

Serela stifled the urge to cry in frustration. She would NOT leave this huge hunk of meat here alone to be feasted on by all manner of creatures in the time it would take for her to return home and come back with help. NO, she had to find a way to get it back herself. Sitting down holding her knees to her chest, she rested her head on her arms and tried very hard to concentrate. Her mother had been teaching her more and more over the years to use the reservoir of power within her for a multitude of purposes, not the very least moving things with her mind, and not with her strength. She closed her eyes, deep into her mind she went, delving into the light she found there at it's centre, trying to take hold of it and bend it to her will.

The sound of a heavy weight shifting on the forest floor made her snap her head up to attention, breaking the connection. Her kill had moved almost through the clump of trees. Smiling, she bent her head back down again and concentrated. This time, she knew what to do.

It was almost dark when Serela's mother heard her daughter come in from her hunt. Worried, she set down the dish she had been drying, and looking out the window from the kitchen hearth, she saw Serela stagger out from the trees with the look of utter exhaustion. By the time her mother reached the door Serela was already there, her face contorted in pain and sweat, but she gave her mother a smile and patted her arm before coming inside, heading straight for her room and the bed that awaited her.

Confused, her mother watched her until she had shut the door to her room, and then she looked out in front of the house, only to see the large, dark shadow of a dead animal awaiting her in front of the doorstep.


	3. III The Pursuit

A man sat in his room, trying in vain to meditate as he had been able to years ago. The boy named Ben Solo had now become the man named Kylo Ren, and it felt like centuries had passed since that day in the temple when the Force granted him a vision of her.

 _Who is she? Why is she so important? Where do I find her?_

All questions that had been replayed in his mind multiple times a day for the last 15 years. The vision had never repeated itself, and over time he had begun to lose the details of her face, remembering only small pieces of information like skin and hair color. The rest was blurred until finally time had reduced the memory so much that he barely remembered anything beyond those small facts.

It frustrated him to no end, but his uncle's words replayed over and over in his head every time he found himself furious at the ravages of memory over time.

 _"I'm sure that in time, the Force will reveal itself to you and you will find the answer to the riddle it has placed before you."_

Yet Kylo had felt increasingly uneasy over the years at his inability to find her. If this girl was such a key person, why had she not appeared before now? What could be the reasoning behind the Force showing him such a vision at the age of 8 and never again since?

The persistent, nagging thought that plagued him was that perhaps that vision had been meant for someone else, for Ben Solo, the young boy he slew the same day he massacred his fellow padawans in his uncle's temple and Kylo Ren was born. Ben Solo was dead, and so maybe the vision meant for him was now gone, never to return for the monster who inhabited the shell of his body.

 _But the vision said that together we would bring balance to the Force._

The more he pondered it, the more frustrated he became, and when he felt the familiar urge to destroy something, he reached his hand to the table beside his bed and felt the soft thud of the lightsaber being drawn into his hand. Gripping it tightly, he presses the button and the red blade comes out, it's menacing glow reflecting in the reflection of his grandfather's warped helmet, sitting on a table.

"Tell me what to do grandfather, _please_ ," he implores the helmet, only to be met with no response as always.

 _How can I finish what Darth Vader started? I thought it would be so much easier than it has been. If the girl is no longer in my path, what is the way forward then?_

His anxious mind gave way to frustration again, getting the better of him. He stood to his feet and slashed a deep gash into the wall of his bedroom, the metal singing and the faint smell of smoke permeating the room as it left another black streak on the wall where other marks were still visible.

A knock on the door.

"WHAT IS IT?" he yelled.

"Commander Ren," a stormtrooper's voice carried through the door, "General Hux and Lord Snoke request your presence."

Kylo gave no response, but a moment later the door swooshed open to reveal him in his mask and full black garb, turning to follow the stormtrooper towards the throne room.

"You seemed troubled Kylo Ren," Lord Snoke's gravelly voice echoed throughout the massive room, "Tell me what is troubling you."

General Hux turned his face to stare at his rival, and he seemed to give a sardonic expression which said, _Yes, Kylo, do tell..._

Annoyed, Kylo turned his attention back to his Master. "It's nothing to trouble you with Master."

Perceptively, Snoke seemed to regard Kylo for a moment, then, "Leave us Hux."

"My Lord," Hux bowed obediently, turning on his heel and giving Kylo a glance that spoke of infinite irritation before marching out, the heels of his shoes clicking on the floor as he left.

"Now, tell me," Snoke ordered.

"My Lord, I am... _increasingly_ troubled by a vision from my past that has yet to come to pass, and it bears unclear repercussions if it happens to be true."

He then told Lord Snoke about the vision in its entirety, explaining where he was and with whom when he received it. The hologram projection listened with rapt attention.

When Kylo Ren had finished recounting it for him, Snoke spoke.

"This could bode very well for us Ren, if it happens to be true, and I believe it does. Why have you not spoken of it before this meeting?"

Kylo gulped, "I had hoped the answer to appear to me before now but with every passing day it begins to agitate my mind even more."

"Yes," the hologram nodded, "Yes, I see why you would be anxious to find her. This woman would be a powerful ally for us, if the Force itself told you she could bring balance to it. What we need to do is ensure that she is found, and turned towards our side."

"Do you believe she is alive sir? Do you believe the vision was real?"

"I do Ren. The Force would not show you something so long ago and so clearly if it was not something meant to come about regardless of your choices. It would have been better if you had mentioned her before so we could have sought for her years ago, making her turn to the Dark side earlier and easier, but no matter. We must find her now, and show her our ways."

"I don't know where to start my Lord," Kylo felt a weight lift off him at Snoke's affirmation of the importance of this vision, but the task at hand still seemed insurmountable.

"One unknown girl in the whole of the galaxy may seem daunting, but I have seen you track before. I have no doubt she will be found by you, and when she is that you will succeed in your quest to turn her."

Bowing his head in obeisance, Kylo murmured, "Yes, my lord."

"Now go and find her Kylo, and bring her here before me."


	4. IV The Resistance

"Ouch!" Serela whimpered, as her mother, Reha, swatted her hand away in the midst of unbraiding her hair.

"Don't touch," she admonished gently, clicking her tongue as she concentrated carefully on the task at hand.

It was still early in the morning and the sun was halfway above the trees, illuminating the room they sat in from the open window. Her mother's hand sewn curtains had been pulled away to allow the light in, letting her aging eyes see better how to undo the braids.

"Your hair is so thick now," her mother murmured, smoothing the strands that she unwove with deft fingers, nimbly picking the braids apart with ease. "Almost done."

Serela held her hands in her lap and surveyed them as she waited. Hard callouses from a life accustomed to manual labour had long since formed and now covered almost every part of her palms. The years of hunting, planting and gathering had made her strong physically, and the years of meditation and her mother's instruction made her strong at heart.

It had been many years now since she had learned the truth behind her parentage and her father's infrequent visits, but it was still something that came to mind often, especially in special moments shared between the two of them.

Her mother had been a mistress for a Senator on Naboo. When she had discovered she was pregnant, Serela's father had sent her away in secret to this place, building her a small cottage as a penance for his inability to be with them. He'd paid the nearby villagers handsomely to erect the stone edifice and thatch the roof so tight that no water had yet to seep through in almost 20 years time.

Serela was born in that cottage, with the help of the village women her mother had endured 2 days of labor and finally pushed her daughter into the world, weeping with joy and pain as they laid the babe in her arms.

She had grown strong quickly, always looking forward to the times when her father could sneak away to be with them. A few stolen hours here and there every few months felt like heaven to her, but it was only because she was still too young to question that it could be any other way.

When he was not away working for the Galactic Empire in Coruscant, and not on Naboo with his wife and other children, he would take a spare Republic Cruiser and fly to see them in their small homestead on Takodana.

They had flourished here in a way her father could have never expected. His guilt at having to send them away had been severe, but Reha was a strong woman. Born of two farmers who had tilled the soil every day of their lives, she had tilled it with them until the day she left home with their blessing in search of love and adventure. In her youth on Naboo she had been a circus performer and she taught her daughter the arts of gymnastics and meditation. Describing herself as a Child of the Light, she instilled Serela with a sense of every goodness and innocence, raising her only to fight in self defense, to show care and kindness for everyone, and to work hard at everything her hands found to do.

Reha had also been diligent to teach her daughter her studies. They both had a natural aptitude for history and languages, Serela now had learned to speak 4, one more than her mother could boast. Remarkably astute for the daughter of two poor farmers, Reha had only learned to read and write before she moved to one of the major cities of Naboo. There she had gone to classes at the university under the guise of being a student, and there she had listened and learned much in the ways of the galaxy and it's workings. The politics, the science, the mathematics, those were the areas in which she struggled. In everything else the teachers found a mind bright and apt to soak up every piece of knowledge it could.

It was there in the city that she had become acquainted with Reha's father, a politician, Senator, and visiting lecturer to one of the universities. She told Serela that she had listened to him speak one lecture for 2 hours, and then afterwards stayed to ask him questions, and that was it.

Life on her planet was wild and rugged, both harsh and dulcet at the same time. The climate was mild, never prone to extremes one way or the other. The winters were chilly without the presence of snow and the summers were balmy but with the lakes and tree cover over 95% of the planet it was never unbearably so. The majority of people in their village made a living from the land and trade with the various smugglers and pirates who came through on their way to the nearby castle of Maz Kanata.

Serela had been there a handful of times, usually with her mother or her best friend, Lana. They had been around 12 the first time their mother's had trusted them to make the journey there without them, promising to be home before dark and kept to the well worn paths. Upon arrival they'd discovered the castle in a wild celebration, the multi-coloured flags and streamers caught high in the breeze and the courtyard being full of dancers and entertainers of every sort. The two girls had climbed to the top of the ramparts and watched from above to enjoy every scene.

For every way they were similar, there were an equal number of ways they were different. Lana longed for a chance to leave this planet and find a new life elsewhere, Serela dreamed of a life and a family of her own one day on the same homestead as her mother. They were inseperable, her and Reha, and though she watched many of the other village girls quarrel with their mothers regularly, the idea seemed so foreign to her. She and Reha had no one but each other, how could she ever resent her?

Titus, her birth father had died when she was 14. An assassination by the First Order was the rumour, but never proven, or at least if so no official news ever reached this remote corner of the galaxy. A member of his staff he had entrusted with the secret of his illegitimate daughter had snuck away after the funeral to deliver the news in person. She and Reha had wept for two days, though Reha perhaps more than her. While Serela loved her father, she had never had much of a chance to bond with him. He was like an ever present but seldom seen spirit. His presence was always welcome, but never expected, and so when it was gone, it was not as much missed.

"There," Reha spoke proudly, "It's perfect."

Serela glanced down at her hair spilling over her shoulders to dangle just over her lap, almost to her waist when she was fully standing. Both women were small in stature, forever needing the chairs to reach most things in the cottage. They spent most days out in the garden or Serala out hunting for meat, the evenings by the fire cooking the food and laughing as Reha impressed more knowledge upon her daughter, always cautioning her to remain aware of the power within her, to respect and adhere to it.

"For it will not fail you," she exhorted, squinting in the firelight to find the seam she was trying to repair in a tunic.

In the afternoons 3 times a week, Serela had taken it upon herself to school the village children in their basic studies, as her mother had for her so long ago. Learning to read and write on such a remote planet was considered a luxury by many, who were often surprised to hear of Serela's endeavors to educate their young. Nevertheless, a free source of getting their young children out from underfoot a few times a week was a welcome enterprise to them.

The children would meet in the rocky glen where Serela's favourite meditation tree still stood, it's branches and roots still strong against the elements of the years. They would use stones to draw on the rocks and practice their numbers and letters, asking her questions of the world and its comings and goings. A few of them displayed signs of the Light as well, and Serela also attempted to guide them in their paths in this avenue as well, relying on her mother's counsel when necessary.

Her mother felt pride in her heart every time she saw the daughter she had raised and the woman she had become. In her wildest dreams she had never imagined that out of such a situation could still rise a girl so beautiful, so innocent and pure, so full of the Light and just so _good_. When Titus had sent them here for safekeeping she had been resentful at first, but with the birth of Serela she had resolved to better herself in every way, for her sake. Seeing her now, as she turned her head to look at her mother with a smile, she saw once again that her 20 years of work and sacrifice had not been in vain. Her daughter was well and truly a child of the Light, regardless of her upbringing and circumstance, at her core Serela held a piece of the Light so bright that nothing could distinguish it.

"Go look in the mirror," she told her daughter, and Serela stood obediently and headed to her room, her skirt brushing the dry dirt floor leaving motes of dirt spin upwards in circles, caught in the morning light. Reha brushed a tear from the corner of her eye as she busied herself in clearing the kitchen table to set out breakfast.

Serela reentered the kitchen and hugged her mother from behind, "Thank you," she whispered, "Go rest now, let me set the table."

Glad for the break to be alone with her thoughts, Reha went out through the front door and into the yard where she'd found Serela's massive eopie kill 5 years ago. It had been the first time she had seen her daughter use such a prominent display of her powers. Although she did not know exactly how rare Serela's strength in the Light was, she suspected that the girl she had raised displayed much more of it than most could be expected to.

Inside, Serela finished clearing off the table of her comb and the sewing supplies they'd left out from the night before. She grabbed the basket of fruit and eggs she had placed on the windowsill before she'd come in from her morning meditation. Her mother often braided her hair before bed and after a bath, allowing it to set for the night before unbraiding it, but this week the reasoning behind it was special.

Every year the village put on their own festival to rival Maz Kanata's, and although it was mostly just their own folk, sometimes word traveled and others would come from nearby villages and every once and a while even the castle itself to partake in the festivities.

Along with her adopted duties as the schooler of the children, Serela had taken it upon herself to choreograph and put on a performance amongst the few remaining young women of the village. The children were to take part as well, but the primary focus of the performance would be on her and her company of 5-6 others. Her mother had braided her hair especially for the occasion which was only days away, and so she was up early this morning to meet the children and rehearse.

The morning passed quickly after breakfast. Reha had sent her daughter with a basket of leftover fruit for the children and shooed her on her way, promising to have dinner ready early tonight.

As Serela took her familiar path to the old tree, she stopped along the way to pick some flowers, which she wove as she walked into a small crown, like she had as a child on her mother's knees.

When she reached the grove of trees and rocks most of the children were already there to greet her, laughing and talking excitedly at the prospect of taking part in the annual celebration. They ran to her and hugged her tight around the waist, each one vying for a small moment of her attention before the rehearsal began.

They would hardly have known about the battle except for Rando's superior hearing.

"Ms. Serela!" he called, raising his hand in a wild, flailing manner to be granted permission to speak.

"Yes, Rando? What's wrong?"

"There's explosions nearby, coming from the east side of the big lake!"

The children all looked at each other, eyes wide and then looking to her, their teacher, to see if they should be panicked or not.

Serela closed her eyes, trying to drown out the world for a moment, listening to the chirping of the birds and the chattering of the children, then pushing through to that deep place, to seek out the truth of the matter.

What she saw made her eyes snap open almost immediately.

"Go home children, run, do not walk."

A few shrieked in panic and she shushed them immediately, for her vision had also shown her another danger besides the explosions by the lake. A patrol of armed men in white suits and masks was headed directly their way, and she knew that they were almost upon them.

"Quiet children, be as silent as the night, get on the path and run home without making a sound. I will take care that the path behind you is safe."

Obediently, they rose to their feet and made a dash for the trees, not looking back to see their beloved teacher as she stood and closed her eyes again, seeing that the majority of the soldiers had turned back at the sound of the fighting, but two of them continued to close in around the glen where she was standing.

Her plan was to lead them away from the direction the children had gone in, but first they had to get close enough to see her and follow.

Nervously, she stood her ground, her feet tapping on the stone beneath her and her breathing heavier as her heart began to race. She had never had to use her power to defend herself against advanced weapons, just natural elements and tasks around the cottage. What if she was not up to the task?

 _At the very least_ , she thought, _I must save the children. I must give them enough time to get away._

No sooner had that thought crossed her mind than she saw the white armour of the two men step out from the trees. "Don't move!" one of them shouted at her through the mask.

Serela bolted at his words, running for the same clump of trees she had chased the eopie through all those years before. The boulders around her burst into pebbles at the blast from their weapons, her feet narrowing dodging each one by millimeters. Inside her, a small voice seemed to be directing her when to move and where to go, _step here, not there_ it almost seemed to say, and she felt as if her feet weren't even moving of her own volition, but of the Light she held within her.

The soldiers chased her over the now crumbling boulders to reach the trees she had run through. She knew her best chance was to try and lose them. There was no telling how well she would fare 1-1, but 2-1 seemed like foolish odds to bet on. She led them panting through the deep parts of the forest she had come to know very well since the day she had chased her dinner for what felt like miles.

Loose dirt beneath her feet softened the blow of her heavy footsteps, and when she cleared another group of leafy fronds she turned her head back to see if they were visible.

Nowhere in sight, but by no means feeling safe, she curved her path to come back around, heading toward one of the other paths she had long since discovered in the years she had hunted these woods.

She was now running in the same direction she had come, crouching as low as possible but trying to keep a fast pace. They could be hiding anywhere in the greenery and she stopped just short of the boulder pit and listened carefully for signs of life outside the ordinary here.

 _Coming up on your left_ the voice whispered to her.

One more glance behind her revealed both of them heading towards her. She bolted to the right, skirted the trees around the boulders, looking at the rocks she'd sat on for years now reduced almost to dust.

As she came around the bend towards the other side of her special tree, she took a chance and jumping down, then threw herself into the hideaway of the roots, curving herself into a ball and landing in a roll, then encasing herself as much into the tree as possible, waiting for a sign of them.

Her heart thumping wildly, she waited with bated breath for any sight or sound that might indicate they had seen her.

Finally, a _thump thump thumping_ resounded overhead, the boots stomped behind her, making a cracking sound as they stepped on the roots.

Serela pushed her head back into the dirt, roots tangling in her hair as she tried her hardest to blend in. Wearing her purple dress was not the best choice today.

Suddenly, the white uniform jumped down onto one of the remaining boulders, looking around the rubble for any sign of her. She held her breath, waiting for him to turn around and see her.

Panicking, she looked around for something, anything she could use as a weapon. He was walking directly in front of her; if she stretched out her arm she could have touched his leg. Did he hear her breathing?

"Do you see her down there?" A voice above her called.

"Nothing yet, but she can't be far," her would-be assailant answered.

Oh no, he was turning now. In a matter of seconds he was going to see her. Every hair of hers stood on edge and she could have sworn she felt static in her fingertips.

BOOM! Suddenly he went flying backward the moment he had fully turned and seen her. His body went soaring into the trees beyond the rocky grove, and she heard the shuffling of feet as the other seemed to hesitate, then run back the way he had come.

She wasn't sure how long she waited there, eyes closed and holding onto the loose roots for dear life. At any moment she thought they would come back, and with reinforcements, but after a few minutes she hesitantly stuck her head out before she ventured outside.

Her once peaceful sanctuary looked like a half-completed demolition project. Shards of rock were strewn everyday and the sharp edges of once smooth boulders looked ragged to the touch.

Too frightened at the thought of more soldiers, she climbed up the remaining boulders and out, running as fast as she could in the direction she had told the children to run back to the village.

Serela's hair streamed behind her in a brown wave as she leaped and bounded along the path, looking to her left and right and over her shoulder every few seconds to make sure she wasn't being followed.

The woods began to look less familiar here, it was a shortcut she seldom used but thought she might have better luck with. Still running, she tried to calculate how far she still was from the village. 10 minutes? 5?

Just as she had concluded that she was only about 10 minutes away, she rounded a corner of the unfamiliar path, and stopped. There, about 15 giant steps away, stood a person in all black, and her heart stopped cold.


	5. V The Encounter

In everyone's life there is a moment, or even many moments that come to pass which alter the course so irrevocably, that the rest of one's history is forever separated in the time before the event, and the time that has occurred after.

This was the same for the moment when Kylo first saw her.

They had tracked the droid BB-8 to the lawless, wild planet of Takodana in the Tashtor sector. The coordinates they'd been able to track down had pointed to the castle of none other than Maz Kanata, the infamous pirate who hosted a wide range of criminals, travelers and smugglers on a daily basis.

It was here that the First Order descended in order to rain hell upon them, weakening their defense before landing to acquire the droid and the information it possessed. It was one of those rare times where Kylo was so occupied, so full of that familiar sense of dark purpose, that he had momentarily forgotten about his quest to find the girl from the vision.

The TIE fighters descended first, firing on the castle at will and leveling it within minutes. The Resistance pilots had manned their T-70 X-Wing fighters and shown up in force, but not enough to stop the carnage from unfolding.

When his ship finally landed amongst the ruins and smoke, Kylo strode from the walkway like a king come to survey his domain. The bodies of the dead were interspersed throughout the debris, and he scanned his surroundings intently, looking for any sign of that little astromech droid.

"Sir! The droid! They've spotted it in the woods!" a nearby storm trooper called to him and pointed in the direction BB-8 had gone. Glancing around once more at the destruction, Kylo Ren gave pursuit in the direction the trooper had pointed, the hilt of his light saber gripped firmly in his hand.

These woods were quiet, peaceful even on any day that wasn't today. The serene surroundings were a vibrant bounty of lush green hues, and it seemed that leaves and moss covered every available surface. He did not stop to enjoy the view though, for he was single-minded in his purpose and nothing and no one would stand in the way of it.

He paused for a moment, closing his eyes and reaching into himself to feel the familiar tug of the Force as it pulled him into the direction he needed to go. Almost immediately it showed him a map, a clear path marked in purple for him to follow. He was so full of adrenaline that he didn't question the fact that the Force had never done this before, he simply locked the information into his brain, opened his eyes and took off in the pursuit of the droid.

Storm troopers behind him followed at a wary distance, but they were soon preoccupied with more TIE fights shooting down at the trees, trying to find their mark through the foliage.

Kylo pursued. He mask was hot and he could feel the sweat of his face rolling down so profusely as his long, black robes only served to make it hotter. The path curved this way and that, always showing exactly as it had in his vision moments before. There was a small hill up ahead and he doubled his efforts in order to crest it. Three steps, two steps, one step more to the top.

That was when he saw her for the first time.

It felt like... like he had been holding his breath underwater for far too long and finally came up for oxygen, gulping the air from the surface. It felt like he had been wandering in a dry desert for years with no water to be found and suddenly there before him stood an oasis. It was like staring at something so bright, so pure that it almost blinded him.

He stopped in his tracks so abruptly, too dumbfounded at the moment to believe his eyes. The blurry memories he had tried to recall from the vision so long ago were now here in front of him as plain as day. She stood a little ways further on the path looking at him in alarm. Her hair was so long, draping down over her shoulders and back in a series of smooth waves that looked like chocolate, almost reaching to her waist. The sleeveless purple dress she wore showed off small, toned arms and in her hand she held a basket with an assortment of fruit and flowers, a few white blossoms braided intricately into a crown for her head. Brown strappy sandals poked out from the bottom of her dress and her small feet looked poised to run for her life at any moment. In spite of her guarded stance, her very being exuded peace, comfort, a warm familiar feeling that he had waited 15 years to feel.

The moment was so surreal, and so brief yet it felt like it went on for eons, at the very least he wanted it to. He felt that he could stare at her, this creature from his dreams, forever and never tire of it. She was here, she was real, and now she was his.

Until she took off running.

"STOP!" he yelled, his mechanical voice carrying through the trees as he raced after her.

She was quick, much faster than he would have given someone of her small stature credit for. Her basket had been carelessly discarded and she ran full out, pumping her arms to lend her speed as she sprinted from him as fast as her feet would carry her.

He chased her through the floor of the forest, the underbrush snagging at his robes and threatening to slow him down, while she seemed to know every bend and twig as she dodged them all with ease, jumping over each fallen log and at one point catapulting over a huge stump directly in their path.

Exhaustion was beginning to set it for him but he pressed on. This would not happen, she would not escape, not after 15 years of waiting. He had to see her, to speak with her, to hear the answers to all of his questions.

Every time he thought he was beginning to gain ground on her she would disappear behind another tree or a grouping of tall felt unbelievable but it looked as though this girl might escape him. But it began to look bleak for him as his pace slowed, or hers somehow sped up, he could not tell in this cumbersome mask and these hots robes. She had just vanishedfrom view again when he heard the news that made him stop.

"My Lord Commander," a voice spoke through the radio in his helmet, "We've found the droid, along with a girl traveling in the company of Han Solo. Both have been captured and taken aboard the ship."

Slowing, Kylo looked around his surroundings, hoping to see a whip of purple fabric to show him which direction she had gone in, but he looked in vain. She had disappeared.

"ARGGGGGH!" he shouted, unsheathing his light saber and proceeding to hack at one of the ancient trees standing next to the path he had pursued her on. The bark sizzled as the blade struck it again and again, it's owner's temper needing a release on something to compensate for his internal agony.

He had lost her, after 15 years of waiting and he could not find her now, when he knew her whereabouts. To have come this far and failed... that was unbearable. Pressing the button to his mask, he ripped it off and threw it on the ground beside him. The air was sweet here, so clean-smelling and he breathed it in ragged gasps, bending over to catch his breath and recollect himself, unaware of the figure high up in the trees watching him, her body concealed by the thick greenery. She peered out as far as she dared, but held her body close to the thick branches where she could remain hidden.

With one last swipe at the tree Kylo stepped back and looked at the damage. The tree was barely harmed. He'd certainly shredded the facade of it, but it's strong, wide base did not give way at all. These roots were deep here, he noted, this tree had probably stood for thousands of years. One hacking from a light saber was not enough to take down something so ancient.

An anguished expression passed over his face as he looked around again, hoping against hope that she would show herself, as he turned the image of her over and over again in his head. Her hair, her dress, her _face_. He _HAD_ to find her again.

Rumblings of static emitted from the discarded helmet and with a huff of his shoulders he stooped down to retrieve it.

"S-Sir, m-my L-Lord R-Ren?" the static was hard to hear through, he must have be away from the ship for too long and the distance was beginning to jam the radio frequency.

"Yes," he growled into the receiver as he donned his helmet once again, looking around one final time before dejectedly beginning the walk back, his silent witness still keeping watch in the trees until she felt sure the coast was clear.

 _Thanks for those who have been reading thus far, I'm trying to be good about updating every day to every other day. I've got most of the story mapped out already in my head, but please let me know if you have any suggestions or gentle critiques. :)_


	6. VI The Aftermath

The sound of frantic children's voices met her the moment she was in sight of the village.

"Serela! Serela! What happened?"

Parents ran out to meet her too. "We heard explosions! The children said you stayed behind to give them time to run!"

"Who was it?"

"Galactic Fighters?"

Her head swam with the questions as she still struggled to process all that had just happened in the woods.

"Yes, yes..." she managed to say, hoping that if she just started to _something_ the right words would come.

A small crowd had formed of about 15 and they all stared at her expectantly, their facial expressions still questioning even when their mouths had stopped.

"I..." she started again, then closed her eyes and the words began to flow.

She explained about where she and the children had been when they first heard the explosions. The approach of the storm troopers and the children's dispersal as she'd stayed behind to lead the men in white away.

Their expressions alternated from shocked to angry to frightened. Serela omitted the real way she had escape from the soldiers and her excursion with the man in black in the woods. His face had been so obscured by the branches she had peered out from that she could barely make out his features. She had been so consumed with escaping him that she had shimmied up the nearest tree without a thought, taking advantage of her momentary gain in distance and the thick leaf cover.

His anger at losing her was apparent and terrifying. His red, glowing sword had been used to slash the closest tree almost to pieces as she watched from her perch high above, a knot forming in her stomach at the thought that she might have been that tree had he caught up to her.

After he had stormed off back the way that he came and she'd felt safe enough to come down, she grabbed one of the vines and slid back down to the forest floor, landing softly and taking off for the village again without a moment's hesitation.

There was no telling if he was still here, and she was too worried for the safety of the children to waste time hanging around to see if he was.

Her hand had brushed along the side of the tree he had tried to massacre and she whispered the words, "I'm sorry," before she sped off.

Back here in the village the news she had brought traveled fast. In all, there were about 20 families here, so in the space of an hour everyone had heard the story retold multiple times as Serela trudged back to her homestead on the outskirts, her whole body aching from the day's events.

Reha's ashen face could be seen from the kitchen window as Serela came into view of the cottage, and from the corner of her eye she saw a blur of blue as her mother ran out the front door to catch her daughter before her collapse.

When Serela came to, she was lying in her bed staring up at the thatched roof with her arms limp by her sides. A look at her window showed it was almost dark outside.

Her entire body felt spent, and slowly she remembered the past hours. The warning, the terror, the running. It all came back to her in full force and she felt herself starting to hyperventilate.

Reha rushed in, a cold rag in her hand which she used to wipe her daughter's brow and sooth her.

"Shhhh," she whispered, "You're safe now."

"But mother," she tried to croak out, "You don't even know what happened."

"Jonas came by and told me everything dear, the whole village knows what happened. An attack on Maz Kanata's castle by the First Order, it's dreadful. Thank goodness you made it out safe."

"But...mother, what I told the villagers was true, but that's not all that happened."

Reha's look was quizzical, and she leaned in closer as if she thought she had not heard her daughter correctly.

Serela stared back at her with eyes in earnest, the rise and fall of her chest beginning to slow down as she reached that familiar place inside herself to quiet her heart, letting it settle her nerves. She gave a heavy sigh, expelling the last of the anxiety from her body, and then began to speak.

She told her mother everything from beginning to end. The walk to the tree, Rando's warning, the children's escape, her attempt to lead the white soldiers away, then the blast throwing him back and allowing her to escape. When she got to the part with the man in black, she heard her mother's breath catch in her throat.

"Did you see his face?" she asked warily, as if she had been dreading this for some time.

Her daughter did not miss this fact, "Do you know something about him, mother?"

Reha shook her head, "Never you mind right now, tell me what happened. Did you see his face?"

Serela recounted how she had been running from the men in white when she stumbled across the man in black. She described how he had stood rooted to the spot for a few moments, staring at her through the mask as if he knew her, and she had stared back in fear rooted to the spot before self preservation took over again and she had turned around to run.

Once she told her mother about finding refuge high above in the tree Reha let out a breath she had been holding for what felt like an hour, "That could have ended very badly."

"Yes, but if I hadn't he might have kept chasing me until I finally tripped or collapsed," she reminded her.

"True, but Serela, you must tell me, _did you see his face?"_

She shook her head, "Not really, the leaves were too thick and I was worried he would see me if I looked out too far."

Reha looked away at that, staring towards the wall lost in her own thoughts, and closed her eyes in that way Serela knew she was consulting with the power inside her as she often did, looking for answers to the questions she could not know herself.

Finally, she turned her face back to her and spoke, "I will let you rest," she said with finality, as if there was nothing more to be said.

Serela wanted to argue, to ask her mother to explain further what all of this meant, but the decisiveness of her final words left little room at this point in time.

"Drink this," the small tube her mother uncorked and handed to her smelled sweet. She drank it in one gulp and laid her head back down to rest her eyes some more. The lukewarm rag was removed and replaced with another cool one.

The arms of sleep seemed to beckon her back, then tug as she tried to remain conscious just a little while longer. Her last memory before sinking back into peaceful slumber was her mother's soft voice saying, "Sleep well my beautiful girl," before quietly shutting the door.

When she next woke, the window showed a pitch black night outside, and when she rolled over to face the door and fall back to sleep she saw the light beneath it telling her a fire was still lit in the hearth.

Worried that her mother had fallen asleep and forgot to put out the fire, she crept from bed and carefully opened the door, trying not to let it squeak on its hinges as loud as it normally did.

Reha sat in front of the fire, wide awake and in her rocking chair, staring into the fire with her eyes closed, her lips murmuring something unintelligible.

"Mother?" Serela said, her voice much stronger than earlier and her body beginning to feel revived from the sleep and rest. Her mother's head twitched a little at the sound, but she did not move yet.

Stepping closer, Serela set a gentle hand on her mother's shoulder, "Mother?" she repeated, louder this time.

Reha's eyes snapped open, pupils dilating and then focusing on her daughter as she left the meditative state she had been in.

Serela bent down, her hands reaching to hold her mother's in her own, "What's wrong mother, what aren't you telling me about what happened today? What does it all mean?"

With a heavy sigh, Reha waved her hand to indicate Serela should sit down, and she did obediantly in the other rocking chair, listening in rapt attention for what her mother would say.

"I had hoped," she started, "To raise you here to be a lady, in spite of your circumstances, so that one day you might leave this place and make a better life for yourself. A better one than I had, despite my best efforts," she gave a small laugh, then looked at her daughter seriously.

"I wanted you to have a better life."

Serela fumbled for words, "But mother, I love our life here. I'm happy where I am."

"Yes, yes," she nodded in agreement, you have always been a singularly happy individual, a product of the surplus of Light you have inside you. Even from infancy I could tell that you were unnaturally full of it, more so than any other being I had met."

"When you were 5, I left you in the care of the Watts for a day and went to a nearby village without you, do you remember?"

Serela sifted through old memories and could not recall that day, shaking her head.

"No matter, I did, and I went to that village because I'd heard rumours of a woman there with the Light, like us, but much more powerful than me. I wanted to consult with her and see what she could tell me. When I finally found her, she and I sat down to meditate together, and she received a vision, which she shared with me. A vision concerning you."

A lump seemed to be caught in Serela's throat, swallowing she asked anxiously, "About me?"

"Yes, she told me you were a singularly gifted individual, with much to do in this world, far beyond Takodana. She instructed me to raise you in the ways of the Light because you would be more than a servant of it, but a carrier as well."

"What does that mean Mother? A carrier of the light."

Reha leaned her head back against the chair, "I wish that I could tell you that my love, but I do not know. This was all that the woman told me. When I tried to go back and consult with her again years later, she had moved on."

"That still doesn't explain the man in black though, who is he?"

"I wish I could tell you that also love, but I have no idea. My heart tells me though that his coming here has much to do with the vision she shared with me all those years ago."

"Could he be a servant of the Light as well?" Serela asked hopefully.

"No my dear, my heart tells me there is some Light in him, but it has been forced out and beaten down for so long that it is almost gone."

"Then perhaps he has been led her so that I can lead him back to it," she conjectured.

"I don't think so Serela, I think he has come here to destroy you, to remove your presence from the galaxy so the Light will have one less strong ally."

Her daughter gulped at the prospect of that, it seemed so unreal, that a person she did not know would hunt her in order to destroy her for a power she had never known she possessed in such quantities.

Reha spoke again, "You must be ready to face him or flee my love. I fear he will be back, and next time he will bring who knows what carnage with him when he comes."


	7. VII The Hunt

He glared at the screen in front of him, a topographical map of Takodana spread out before him as he almost begged it to give up its secrets.

The spot marked in red was the location of Maz Kanata's _former_ castle, now her pile of large blue spots were the lake abutting it, as well as the other surrounding bodies of water. Mountains rose up on either side of the area, enclosing it into almost an egg-like shape, their peaks cresting above the densely wooded terrain. Outlined in purple was the path he had run while in pursuit of her.

That line traced all the way from the destroyed castle to a spot deep into the forest, but no so far as to reach the base of the mountains. Looking at the map made his temper begin to flare again, for all these coordinates they still gave him no idea where else on the 80 million square miles of Takodana she could be.

 _I must go back_. He had decided this the moment he'd be forced to abandon the chase and come back to the ship, promising himself he would return within a fortnight to search her out.

By the time he had reached the bloodbath at the castle's ruins, he was furious and looking for any reason to unleash his fury once again.

When a nearby storm trooper had nervously approached him, telling him the droid had somehow been recovered by the resistance along with the map containing the coordinates to his uncle, Luke Skywalker's location, his anger was so severe that he immediately unsheathed his light saber and slew the trooper where he stood.

Looking down at the body with disdain, Kylo threw back his head and roared with fury. First, he had lost the girl in the woods because they had told him the task of their mission here was complete, only to return and find that it was not, that he had not only failed in recovering the droid but he had also abandoned his best chance at finding _her_ for nothing.

"My Lord Ren," another hesitant storm trooper stepped forward and spoke up. "The girl we captured with the droid originally is still in our custody."

Kylo wheeled around to face him, his billowing black robes whipping around his menacingly with the motion, his heavy mechanical breathing and the still blazing lightsaber at his side made him look all the more fearsome as smoke from the ruins still rose in large clouds behind him. This storm trooper stood still with fear, bracing himself for the same treatment as the former.

"Take me to her," he demanded, and with that they boarded the ship, doors closing with a loud SWSSSSHH and they had taken off.

Interrogating the girl had not gone anywhere near as well as his efforts with the pilot, Poe Dameron. A Force user, though she had not be cognizant of it before now, she had been too strong even as a novice for him to probe her mind for the information he sought. She had challenged him too, reading pieces of his own mind in the effort to read hers, and spoken out loud his deepest fear: that he would never accomplish and surpass the greatness of his grandfather, Darth Vader.

This was nothing though in comparison to the verbal lashing he received from Snoke. To say their conversation was unpleasant would be an understatement, but he had still been too distracted with the almost overpowering desire to return and seek out the girl that he had not been as infuriated as he usually would have.

Hux had seemed very pleased with Kylo's misfortune, barely hiding his smirk at Snoke read him the riot act about his failure to obtain the droid and the information on how to find his uncle.

Kylo Ren took all of it on the chin, saying very little and trying his best to concentrate instead of allowing his mind to wander further, back to the woods in Takodana.

Back to _her._

 _"Leave us_ General Hux," Snoke hissed, and Kylo's attention was redirected to his Master.

Obviously miffed at missing the opportunity to see Kylo punished, Hux saluted and marched out stoically, resenting his lack of inclusion as the two Force-users were left alone to confer again.

"Ren..." Snoke's voice was seething, "What is it that is so distracting you this time? I sense that you are not single-minded this evening, nor have you been since you returned from Takodana. Explain yourself."

Kylo raised his head to look at his Master, his expressions had betrayed him, and he knew it. Although there were very few people who could overpower him now to read his mind, he knew that Snoke was one of them, and so he had better come out with the truth or a very convincing lie.

He opted for the former.

"On Takodana I found the girl we spoke of. The one from my vision with my uncle so many years ago."

Snoke stiffened on his throne, leaning in closer. "And?"

Kylo swallowed, "She escaped me. I was chasing her when I received the word that the droid and the girl had been captured. I returned to my duty and abandoned the chase."

The silence seemed to stretch on and on as Kylo waited for Snoke's response.

"So you know where she is at last then?"

He shook his head, "No Master, I would have to return to Takodana search the area. It would likely not be easy."

"Then go, my apprentice, with my blessing. Go and retrieve this girl, and bring her here to me. There is much I wish to know about her."

"Yes, Master."

When Kylo turned to go, Snoke stopped him, "Wait!" he said, and watched Kylo turn again to face him.

"If this girl is everything the vision led you to believe, she will be a powerful ally for the Light side if she is found by the Resistance. That must not happen Ren. If she refuses to turn toward our cause, you must kill her."

Kylo's face was impassive, his stony expression did not show the hole he felt had just been ripped inside of him at the thought. How could he possibly?

"Of course, Master."

"You have three days to go and retrieve her, use them wisely," Snoke warned.

Kylo nodded his head and silence and turned to leave again, this time Snoke did not stop him, but sat on his throne, his hands pressed together in quiet contemplation.

Upon hearing the hissing sound of the doors shutting behind him, Kylo's pace quickened on his way back to his chambers. He was going back, he would find her for sure now, and he would bring her back here. He would learn everything there was to know about her and then bring her back here with him. Then he would understand all the secrets the Force had kept from him all these years. Then he would be free to embrace the Dark side without encumbrance once and for all.


	8. VIII The Meeting

Two weeks had passed since the destruction of the castle and Serela's narrow escape from the soldiers who had tried to kill her.

She and Reha had both been watchful, the everyday noises and sounds of the cottage and surrounding woods causing them to jump in fear that this was it, the moment when the man in black would return for whatever his dark purpose was.

Still, Serela refused to be cowed by the fear. While the children were too wary of meeting at her former place of instruction, she resumed teaching them in the barn on their homestead, just a short walk from the cottage which housed their tools for the garden and a few sheep for the wool to make clothes. The chicken coop also stood nearby, providing an endless source of entertainment for the children as they chased them throughout the yard, making a game of who could catch the fastest one, and it made Serela smile to remember her and Lana playing something similar in their youth.

While in the village she had run into Lana's parents, who informed her that the job she had taken in Andui was working out so well for her, and that they hoped to move there with her when she had saved up enough money to settle herself, which should be soon, and would Serela like to go with them? When they made the move?

She swallowed at the thought of leaving this place, of leaving her mother and the cottage and 20 years worth of memories behind. She missed her friend yes, but in a way she felt a friendship with this place, with the trees and birds and animals and the people of the village, she felt a deep kinship with all that this planet offered and possessed. It was her home, from birth until now, and she hoped she would one day marry and raise children of her own on it's soil.

A ball flew towards her and she deflected it just in time before it would have hit her in the face. "Be careful, Karo!"

The little boy looked down at the ground sheepishly, his foot kicking at the dirt, "Sorry," he said genuinely.

Serala walked over to him and gave his a small side hug on his shoulders, "It's alright Karo, you just have to watch where you throw things or someone could get hurt. You wouldn't want to hurt anyone, would you?"

"Sometimes," he mumbled, and she stooped down to listen to him finish his thoughts, "Only when people are mean to me, like my brother. Then sometimes I _do_ want to hurt them. Is that bad?" his eyes searched her face for some form of affirmation that he was not some monster.

"We all deal with people and things that are difficult," Serela began, "But what distinguishes the Light from the Dark is how we react to those things, what we do with them. Do we allow them to change us into something we're not, into something we deep down do not wish to be? Or do we press on in spite of them, determined to pursue the Light whatever the cost?"

Her words affected him deeply, and as she stood up he buried his face into her waist, the dampness of his tears wetting the fabric there. Serela held his hands in hers and looked down affectionately, ignoring the noise from the others as she gave him these few moments of undivided attention and comfort. His mother had died last spring and his father was a hard man, ruling him and his two brothers with an iron fist. She knew that life was harder for him in many ways than it had ever been for her. Although people always talked about the importance of a father for his son and mothers for daughters, she knew that deep down, a boy still desperately needed his mother.

When he let go and ventured back to the other children she decided to dismiss them early today. She felt inspired to go out for a hunt, and to meditate under her familiar tree for the first time since her ordeal weeks ago. The sun was almost directly above them and she wanted to get moving if she was going to make it there with enough time for both.

Giving Karo one last, heartfelt hug, she watched them file onto the path back to the village, some racing the whole way back while others held hands or stopped to look at flowers along the way.

Serela went inside the house to change into her hunting clothes and retrieve her bow and arrow. Her hair was braided again, the festival had been postponed in the aftermath of the battle at the castle. Many of the survivors had come to their village seeking shelter and rations, so the festivities had to be put on hold for the time being. It was currently scheduled for two weeks from today, which suited Serala just fine as it gave her more time to prepare her dance routine with the village women.

A quick kiss on her mother's cheek on the way out the door a brief stop to grab her bow and arrow from the shed, then she was off, back in the direction she had taken almost every day for years now. The quiver and bow she slung over her back, running with reckless abandon not as one being chased, but as one free to do it for the pleasure of running.

The same turns appeared in the path and she took them at a steady pace, keeping her eyes opened for any sign of movement from man or beast as she made her way to the tree.

When she saw it's wide trunk from a distance, her heart swelled with affection and she increased her pace, anxious to rest once again beneath it's branches.

She approached the grove of boulders gingerly, taking note of how many had been destroyed by the soldiers weapons, and noting with gratitude that her favourite stone remained untouched. Settling onto it, she placed her bow and quiver nearby, ready to drink deep of the energy that flowed through her every time she came to this place.

Legs crossed and arms resting atop her knees, she dove into the sensation, allowing herself to rest comfortably in the nothingness she had worked so long to harness. It was dark in here, but not uncomfortably. It felt safe and warm, and behind her closed eyes she suddenly saw herself standing in a field of wheat, a warm sun beating down and a strong wind blowing across the grain, bending the stalks in unison under it's powerful force. She could only see herself from her back, but her hair caught likewise in the wind, waving in wild tendrils all around her as she leaned her head back and stretched out her arms in the bright sunlight, warmed by it's rays in this field of gold.

There was something off though, and as she looked ahead at herself standing free in the field she saw a figure approaching, though she could not make them out. Closer and closer now they were coming, until they were almost upon her.

She opened her eyes then from her meditation and there, on the edge of the trees, stood the man in black, watching her through his mask, head cocked to the side.

Her blood ran cold, ice travelling through every vein as she waited to see what he would do. Her eyes flickered to her bow and quiver, knowing she would waste precious seconds trying to grab them, but even when she tried to move minutely, she couldn't.

His black-gloved hand was outstretched towards her, shaking with the effort of holding her in place. Now she knew she was in trouble.

 _You can break his control_ the voice inside her spoke, _use your power, break his concentration and you will break free._

Panicked, she looked around for anything she could do, anything she could use, but all parts of her body were paralyzed except for her mind. The rustling of the trees seemed to call out to her, as if volunteering their services as she crafted a spur of the moment plan born of desperation.

The sound of one of the trees he had just came out from cracking in half was almost deafening, the rings in the trunk from hundreds of years snapping and pulling apart caused the man in black to turn his head and break his concentration and his hold over her, in order to stop the tree from falling on himself.

That was all the break she needed. Holding out her hand, she felt the bow and quiver fly towards her and she sprinted the opposite way, barreling through the trees down the same path again that she had taken so many years before in chasing her first eopie kill.

A crash and a roar behind her told her that the tree had fallen and he was either under it and in pain or simply screaming in frustration at being sidetracked. The sounds of leaves and twigs being viciously ripped apart behind her told her it was not the former.

Serela sped up, putting all of her energy into gaining ground. She had escaped him once before right? Here she had the advantage again, this was her terrain, these were her trees, her plants and environment, if she could just get far enough away from him to hide again she would make it.

Glancing behind her, she saw his fearsome mask heading straight for her, pumping his arms faster than anyone she had ever seen as he barreled towards her. Terrified, she pushed onwards, losing speed as she realised how fast he was gaining this time and that she would prob not be able to outrun him for much longer.

The clump of leafy bushes ahead of her beckoned, and she charged through them recklessly, not stopping to look around at where she was. It wasn't until she found herself about to run over the edge of the cliff face that she remembered this place.

Standing there on the edge, she looked back and saw him stop a few feet away, approaching cautiously, as if not wanting her to spook and fall over.

His hand stretched out and she could feel him trying to hold her still again, but she was prepared and mentally put up a wall, trying to defend herself from the attack while balancing precariously on the edge.

"Don't," she heard his mechanical voice from the mask for the first time, and it sounded strange. Did he think she was going to jump?

Serela had just shifted her foot forward a centimeter when she felt the rocks beneath her slip, breaking her concentration, she felt herself falling backwards suddenly, and the air beneath her rushed at her as she twisted and plummeted towards the rocks below.

She barely had time to think about her impending death before she felt her body's downward path halt, stopping her just before her face was about to collide with the ragged point of a rock. Slowly, she felt her body lifting, bound by invisible ties as she rose helplessly upwards through the air, where the man in black stood, both arms outstretched, waiting on the edge.

Trying to scream, she could not even open her mouth as her body glided over the edge and then landed softly on the ground. He stepped over to her and bent down, bringing his hand to her terrified face. When she felt the invisible bounds loosen she was just about to scream before she felt a coolness in her temple from his hands and her world went black.


	9. IX The Introduction

The morning after Snoke had given him his order, Kylo Ren set off in a spare TIE fighter for Takodana. He took with him only the bare essentials of food and spare changes of robes, all packed in with Hux's sardonic 'good wishes on your mission' taking off at lightspeed the second he was far enough from the Finalizer to do so.

It didn't take long for him to reach the sprawling wooded, planet, his small ship landing easily amongst the wreckage of the castle from a few weeks before. He saw that all signs of life seemed to have disappeared and what survivors there may have been must have dispersed elsewhere. He stepped over the foul smell of decay and dead bodies left to dry in the sun, unsure of where to start.

Thinking he was more likely to have better luck in the place he had seen her last, he re-boarded the vehicle and directed it upwards, charting the coordinates he had logged in his memory the day he had lost her here in these woods.

When he landed this time he did so on uneven terrain, the leaves and brambles beneath him giving way as the heavy ship settled after breaking half the branches it had landed through down with it.

The planet looked much the same as before, green and beautiful, and even through the mask he could smell the clean air and a whiff of the lake's crystal clear water, pristine in the morning sun.

He set off east, hoping he would see a village or any other sign of life as he walked, but an hour later he had found nothing. Just trees, trees, and more trees. Discouraged, he wondered if he had been wrong about searching here, there was no way to know if she resided in the valley or the mountains or anywhere else on this planet. He had merely chosen to return to this spot on a hunch.

Growling to himself, he closed his eyes and tried to consult with the Force, asking it to show him the way to go as it had before without his knowledge. Of course now it was obvious that the Force had been leading him to the girl instead of the droid that day, clearly finding out that she existed was of greater primary importance.

Though he waited for some indication of the way he should take to find her, he found none, the Force giving him no help in his endeavor.

It was only later, after he had been searching for some hours, that he tried again to listen for the Force's help. At first it was the same, nothingness answered him and he reached for the hilt of his lightsaber in frustration, preparing to destroy something, when in the blackness of his mind he saw the faint purple light again.

A path outlined itself for him, and when he opened his eyes, there it was on the ground as well. A deep purple hue that led from where he was standing through a spot in the trees he had not thought to take. He noticed that with every step he took, when he looked behind him the light had faded to nothing.

Once realising he was on the right path, Kylo took off running in the direction the light was leading him, his black boots tracing the steps as fast as he could go. When he had gone several miles, he reached a point in the path where he stopped, feeling an almost invisible wall of energy in front of him.

The purple light of the path led into a dense crop of trees before him which he could not see through from here, and somewhere inside him he knew, she was on the other side.

As if to confirm to him that he was indeed at the end of his journey, the purple light seemed to flare for a moment, and then fade away.

Tentatively, he took steps forward, careful not to move too quickly or make any sudden noises. He stepped into the trees, brushing their branches aside until he was almost free of them, and then stepping out in an open area.

There she was, sitting silent in meditation on a rock in the middle of a grove of boulders all surrounding an enormous tree that seemed as wide around as he was tall. Her eyes were shut, her arms hung loosely at her sides, resting on her knees. This was the power he had sensed as he approached, _she_ was the one giving off such strong vibes of the Force.

She opened her eyes in alarm as if she had sensed him standing there and impulsively, he reached out his hand, holding her paralyzed where she sat. He did not want to scare her, but nor did he want to chase her through this godforsaken planet again.

Kylo started to approach, hoping he could calm her when he reached her without knocking her out. It wasn't his favourite method, but if it kept her still long enough for him to get answers from her he would do it. Her small body seemed to be shaking in apprehension as he crept nearer.

Suddenly a massive cracking sound behind him drew his attention and he turned his head, distracted long enough that his hold on her was broken, and she bolted.

The sound had come from an enormous, ancient tree taller than many buildings he had seen on other planets. He thrust out his hand and used his powers to catch it effortlessly before it fell directly on him, dropping it to his left with a huge rumble and glancing behind him to see she was gone.

A roar escaped from his throat of pure, raw fury. He pulled out his lightsaber and took one huge swipe at the tree she had dropped on him, then ran full tilt after the direction he could sense she had gone.

Now that they were in close proximity and he had seen her use the Force, he could feel her presence nearby, though growing further and further away. When he cleared through the trees again he could make out her back running East as fast as her legs would carry her, bow and quiver bouncing against her back as she did.

Briefly, she glanced behind her and he knew she saw him running in her direction by the look of terror as she turned back and kept on. He would not let her get away this time, he could not, his mind and body could not bear it again, not after so much time.

This thought gave him renewed energy and he sped up more, beginning to gain the ground between them more rapidly.

When she turned around again he knew she saw how close he was to catching her and she dashed through another dense cluster of trees. WHY WERE THERE SO MANY TREES?

He sped onward and burst through them, finding himself in an open space, the ground flat and devoid of grass, and saw her running towards what he could see even from here was a cliff.

Now he approached slowly, as he saw her skirt the edges and look at him in fear, clearly weighing the option of death or capture. Her feet were so perilously close to the edge.

"Don't," he pleaded, understanding that his gravelly, mechanical voice was probably only contributing to her terror, but afraid to reach up and remove his mask in case she slipped.

She was glancing back and forth from him to the bottom of the cliff, bewildered and fearful, and when he reached out his hand to hold her steady she threw up her mental shield to prevent him. Frustrated, he told himself if he could just get to her before she did something rash, she would be fine. Then he saw her move her foot.

Her body slipped from the edge so fast, tumbling backwards as he ran to the edge, both hands reaching out to catch her. Kylo saw her body stopped midair just before impact, and breathed a sigh of relief, raising her upwards, back to the top of the cliff. He made sure to paralyze her body so she would not thrash around and potentially break his hold, plunging her to a gory death.

Once she had cleared the edge he floated her body a few feet away and set her down, still retaining his hold on her limbs until he could kneel down beside her. Touching her face, he looked into her horrified eyes and released her from his control. Immediately he felt her power rearing up to strike back, and on the impulse of the moment, he pressed his finger to her temple, and then she slept.

He watched her in her sleep, hoping that maybe in her vulnerable state he could ascertain more about her. Sitting back on his legs, he recalled the vision again, going through each scene for details he may have forgotten. The baby in the basket, the girl on her mother's knees, the brown mark on her shoulder.

 _That was it_.

Rolling her onto her side, he stretched the sleeve of her shirt away from her skin, allowing his fingers to make contact with it as he sought out the mark.

 _There it was_. The brown crescent moon shape peered out at him from beneath her shirt and he felt he could barely swallow. After so many years of waiting, a decade and a half of wondering, half the time telling himself that she was not real, that his current path had taken him too far away from her, only now to see her here, in front of him where he could look at her freely instead of a poorly remembered vision as an 8 year old boy.

He rolled her onto her back again, satisfied beyond a doubt that this was indeed who he meant to find, and she began to stir. As her eyes opened, she looked directly up at first, seemingly mesmerized by the green tops of the trees dancing overhead. Then she seemed to remember how she got her and looked over to see him.

Before she could retaliate, he jumped over top of her, pinning down her arms and staring into her eyes, now able to see them up close for the first time. They were incredible, he'd never seen eyes like them before, the way they merged into the different shades and seemed to change even as he stared. They looked up at him now in a mixture of anxiety and defiance.

He felt her muscles move as she tried to push him off of her, but she was so small and frail that he easily overpowered her.

"Calm down," his robotic voice ordered, and he remembered his face and how much more terrifying it probably was. Still, he couldn't let her go until he was sure she wouldn't run away.

"I want to let you go," he started, "But I have to be sure you're not going to make me chase you again. Okay?"

She seemed to regard him with suspicion, but finally nodded. He release one arm first, waiting to see if she would react. When she didn't he released the other arm and then climbed off of her, still wary that she might try something.

She sat up, rubbing her wrists with her hands and looking at him as if to decipher what it was she had been tracked down for. When he'd climbed on top of her to pin her down her mind had automatically assumed the worst, thinking he hadn't just come to kill, but to weaken and damage her beyond repair first. Yet now here he was, standing over her in all black after saving her life, only of course after chasing her to the point that it needed saving of course.

"Are you alright?" he asked, allowing her some space as he took a step back, reaching up to press the button on his helmet.

"Yes," she told him, looking him up from down and taking note of the way he stood before her, as if he was someone used to being obeyed. When her gaze reached his head she waited as he removed his helmet, and it was like she felt the world fall out from under her.

His skin was pale. Much paler than hers, and his hair was long for a man's, almost reaching to his shoulders, which she know noticed were very broad and muscular. She hadn't realised she'd been holding her breath until he spoke and she exhaled again, "Are you in pain?"

She shook her head 'no', looking aware from him to lessen the desire to stare. Serela had not known many boys her age past 16 when many of them left for work in the mines of the mountains to the North of here, and even then, she had never seen one that looked like him.

Kylo took her looking away from him as a further sign of her fear. He wanted to change that, to make her see that he was not here to hurt her, but after years of using violence and control to get his way he wasn't very good at this type of thing.

"I'm... sorry if I scared you," he started, and her head perked up to listen to him, meeting his eyes again, "I've just been... looking for you... for a long time."

 _Nice, Kylo Ren, way to creep her out even more than she already is._

"Me?" she asked doubtfully, "Why?"

Great. Now he'd backed himself into a corner.

"The First Order has been looking for someone we were told is exceptionally strong with the Force who resided on Takodana. I sensed it was you that first day we met in the woods, and so I returned to find you and learn more."

 _Good, good, much less creepy._

"The Force? What is that?"

He gave her a look that said he thought she was bluffing, but when he saw her honest look of innocence, he pressed on, "The Force is what you used to bring that tree down on top of me earlier, it's what enabled me to save you from falling to your death just now."

"Oh, well yes... thanks for that by the way."

"Don't mention it," he shuffled his feet and looking down at them nervously, wishing he had planned better what he was going to say.

"So..." his eyes snapped up to listen to her, "You're... not... here to kill me?"

He smiled, the first smile she'd seen on him, and it filled her heart with an unexpected warmness.

"No," he told her, "I am definitely not here to kill you."

 _Author's Note: Okay so now when I do scenes with them together it will be a bit more of switching between their perspectives, but in the chapters where they are apart I'll still be doing them separately and sometimes inter-lapping. Thanks guys :) feel free to leave actually comments and suggestion too_


	10. X The Answers

It had taken some coaxing on his part, but Kylo had finally persuaded her to walk with him back the way they had come. He tried to slow his long strides down to match her pace, careful not to alarm her in any way.

This felt strange for him, this concern over what someone other than Snoke thought of him. He was so accustomed to people stepping out of his way and obeying his every whim that he'd forgotten what it felt like to trip over his words and think of the best ways to phrase them.

The longer they walked, to more she began to feel comfortable with him, against her better judgement. She thought back to her mother's premonition and tried to push it away into a corner, where it still looked at her, but she could focus on other things like the way his mouth looked when he talked or his eyes scrunched into his face when he smiled.

Inside, she told herself, there is Light in his heart. His facade is pure darkness, but she could sense a Light beneath it, muffled and suppressed, but there, glowing however feebly.

Kylo watched her every expression carefully, analyzing each arch of her eyebrows and twist of her mouth as she contemplated how to answer him. She was still mistrustful, but after some more careful explanations he had managed to appease her anxiety somewhat, repeating more than once that he was not there to kill her, or anyone else.

It felt bizarre to be around someone with the Light side again. Spending all his days surrounded by the Dark side made it easier to resist the temptation when the light called out to him, begging him to return. He knew that he had strayed too far from the Light to ever go back, or even find satisfaction in it if he had wanted to. The power and control that came from the Dark side called to him day and night, keeping it's hold on him in a vice grip, refusing to let go.

He sensed none of that struggle between Light and Dark within her. Indeed, when he tried to read her thoughts, she glowed from the inside when he tried to study her. The brightness of her interior light was so brilliant it felt almost blinding.

Distracted by his thoughts he listened to her chatter on and on as he listened, still pondering the answers she gave to his questions while trying to remember more he had wanted to ask her. He didn't want there to be anything he did not know about her.

When they arrived back at the tree where he had found her she began to recount for him the events with the men in white uniforms the same day he had first chased her in the woods. She showed him the direction the man had been thrown when he had turned towards her and she panicked, somehow blasting him backwards in the process.

Stunned, he listened as she told him how she had been running back to the village when they'd stumbled across each other, and then it was his turn to explain what he and the soldiers in white had been doing on Takodana in the first place.

He explained to her the nature of the mission, recover critical government information that would lead to the capture of an important outlaw. She accepted everything without question, and he marveled at her naive innocence. Even though he equivocated in some of what he said, much of it was the truth, he was just totally unsure how he was going to convince her to come back with him to the Finalizer when it came time for him to leave.

The hour began to grow darker and finally she told him, "I think I should go."

What he wanted to do was tell her she had to stay with him, talk to him all night and answer every question, and in the morning leave with him on his ship to return with him and show Snoke that he was not a failure, that he could follow a task through to completion.

Instead he nodded his head, as if it were natural that he had come all this way to find her and then be left on his own in the woods for the night. He could use the force to find his way back to the TIE fighter, and to find his way from there back to here, but that still meant he had no idea where she lived.

He was just about to speak and ask her if she would meet him here again tomorrow when she spoke, "Will you still be here tomorrow?"

Smiling again, he answered, "Yes, yes, I'll be here tomorrow. First thing."

She nodded her head, accepting his answer, before turning to head back to the village, trusting the cover of impending nightfall to help hide her path if he chose to try and follow. Thinking better of it though, she spun around and looked back at him, 10 feet away and standing on the boulder next to hers, with his arms crossed over his chest and shaggy hair caught in the breeze, "You won't follow me, will you?"

He didn't answer for a moment, and in that brief span of time she was suddenly deathly afraid that she had misjudged him, that she had allowed herself to be duped and now he was about to follow her back to the village to unleash murder and mayhem.

Kylo sensed her fear, and then allayed it for her, "No, I won't."

"Promise?"

His smile broke the widest yet and he chuckled as he reassured her, "I promise."

Smiling back, she turned to leave when she heard him call out, "So what do I call you?"

Giving one last smile over her shoulder she called back, "Serela! What should I call you?"

"Kylo. Kylo Ren."

Back in the TIE fighter, Kylo used to radio to make contact with the Finalizer.

Unfortunately, it was Hux who answered his call.

"Yes?" his sour voice put a damper on Kylo's good mood.

"Tell Lord Snoke I have found the person we are looking for and look forward to delivering them soon."

A long pause preceded Hux's response, as if bracing himself for bad news, "Luke Skywalker?"

"No."

Kylo could almost hear the sigh of relief as Hux received the confirmation that he still had failed to find and deliver his uncle to Snoke, a feat which he himself might be able to deliver on his own.

Neither men betrayed any note of these feelings in their responses to each other though. Hux's only reply was simple, "I will relay your message to Lord Snoke."

Kylo turned off the radio. There was no need for social niceties with his competition. He had found her, he had begun to build her trust, and tomorrow he would see more of her, hopefully convincing her in 2 days time to return with him.

He settled into the pilot's seat, tilting it back as he pulled a blanket over himself, preparing for a night of little sleep, for he was too excited for the events of the following day.

That night Reha remarked to her daughter that she seemed extremely distracted, as she seemed to wander around the cottage aimlessly, lost in thought and her silent musings.

"Am I?" she asked her mother dreamily, her mind preoccupied with the day's events and the way _Kylo_ looked when he smiled at her. There was much darkness in him yes, but underneath that darkness there was still light. The Darkness in him was what had frightened her each time they met, the Light was what had made her feel drawn to him in spite of it. It felt almost as though he held both in equal measure, but the Dark had long ago asserted it's dominance and tried to bury the Light.

Yet underneath the debris in his heart it was still there.

"Yes..." Reha said hesitantly, "You've hardly touched your food."

"Mmm," she responded, not considering that her mother expected more of an explanation than agreement to her statement.

Reha's expression was amused, clearly _something_ had happened in the woods that day, or _someone._

Although she was tempted to press for more information, she allowed her daughter to keep her secrets for now. _Time will tell_ her heart said, _A storm is coming soon that may consume us both. Best to let her have whatever happiness she can now._

If only she had known her daughter's happiness would be the cause of the storm.


	11. XI The Teacher

It had been a long, nearly sleepless night for both. Kylo's position in the TIE fighter was far from a comfortable night's sleep and Serela tossed and turned in her bed, anxiously awaiting the dawn when she could rise and dress, then head back out to see him.

When she did sleep, it was with fitful dreams, her body thrashing in her bed as she imagined being tracked down back to her cottage by an army of white soldiers, their ranks overrunning her home and shooting at it until the roof was engulfed in flames, collapsing the house from the inside.

As the sun broke over the top of the trees and shone it's first rays into her window, she leaped from the bed, pulling on her shoes for the yard and headed out to complete her chores.

By the time Reha awoke Serela was setting the table for breakfast, a plate of eggs and bacon for each of them on the table and a bright smile on her face.

"Good morning," Reha mumbled with a yawn, not trying to hide her shock that her terminally late-sleeping daughter had been up earlier than her, much less early enough to do all this.

"I thought maybe before I leave this morning you could unbraid my hair," she suggested, giving her mother the most persuasive look she could muster.

Still groggy, Reha sat down on the table's bench and regarded her warily, "I thought you wanted me to wait until the day of the festival, in case it got tangled again"

Serela waved her hand at the notion, "Yes, but if that happens we can always rebraid it," she quipped, looking eagerly to her mother for a 'yes' response.

Yawning again, Reha shrugged her shoulders, "Ok fine, but you must let me sit down and eat first. You can't be in such a rush that it can't wait an hour."

Her daughter bit her lip, _Kylo said he would be there first thing..._ but she decided in favour of waiting longer so that her hair would look nice. She did not want to show up in the same thing she'd worn yesterday, with her hunting clothes and her tight braid. She wanted to look nice.

After breakfast Serela rushed around the kitchen to clean and wash up the dishes she had used as her mother went back to her room to change from her nightgown. Serela looked down and realised she was still wearing hers and practically skipped into her room, pulling out on of the three dresses she owned, a strappy green one she had owned since she was 16, but since she had stopped growing around 14 it still fit her. Stripping off her nightgown and pulling the green dress over her head, she dragged her leather sandals out from underneath the bed, tying them around the ankle and standing up to look down at herself, trying to assess if she was presentable.

When she reentered the kitchen her mother was waiting behind the bench for Serela to sit down.

"My my," she joked, her usual teasing self finally awoken, "Are we making a special effort today for someone?"

"Maybe..." Serela let her answer trail off, not wanting to keep the secret from her mother but knowing that if she told her now she was about to meet with the man in black in the woods with no one around to protect her mother would have tried to lock her in her room.

Reha clicked her tongue in that way she always did when she felt like she was playing doubles roles as both doting mother and girlish friend. She gave her daughter a look that said she knew more than Serela thought she did, and she could only smile in response. _Trust me,_ she wanted to say _, this is one time you don't know more than you think you do._

It was still very early when she left, heading in the direction of the village to make her mother think she was heading that way, an after a few minutes she stole around in a circle, making sure to travel far enough that her mother could not see her from any windows of the house or from the garden.

Once she had found the path back to her tree she felt a joy bubbling up inside her which felt so unfamiliar. She had experienced joy before to be sure, and even excitement and longing for things, but never had she felt all those things at once in such high quantities. It was a new sensation, one which made her walk faster as she tried to hasten her arrival.

Along the way to the tree she picked a flower from the path as she had on her way to the tree that first day they'd seen each other in the woods. After she plucked it, she twirled the stem in her fingers before tucking it behind her ear, in the hopes that it didn't make her look too childish.

When she arrived at the tree, Kylo was already sitting there on the same rock as yesterday when she left him, looking around at the scenery until his eyes landed on her and he jumped to his feet.

"Good morning," he smiled.

"Good morning, you didn't sleep here last night, did you?"

Kylo chuckled at the question, "No, last night I slept in my ship. Would you like to see it?"

She hesitated, she still barely knew this man and he could legitimately abduct her at any moment with his powers of mind and body control.

 _But, if he were going to do that, wouldn't he have just finished it yesterday instead of playing along in some grand charade?_

Mollified, Serela smiled at him, "Lead the way," she said.

He led her down the path he had taken the day before, when the Force had shown him the purple path that led right to her sitting beneath the tree. While they walked and talked her stole glances at her, admiring the color of her dress and the way it brought out the bright green hues in her eyes, the way she had done her hair, just like he had seen it the first time he'd found her, even the small blue flower behind her ear left him feeling a well of affection gushing up inside of him for her.

Was all this foretold by the Force as well? Was it all pre-decided 15 years ago, or even before that? How long had the Force been at work to make this moment happen?

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" he asked, realising he had not listened to her last words as he was lost in thought.

"I asked how much further it is."

"Not much," he told her, "Just over this ridge over here..." and with that they crested the top of the hill and his black TIE fighter came into view.

"Wow..." she gasped, looking from the ship to the hole in the tops of the trees where it had landed, "It's enormous."

He grinned at how impressed she was with it, "This is actually a very small ship. I flew here in it from a much, much larger one, at least 1000 times the size of this. I can show it to you if you like."

Her feet stopped moving towards the TIE fighter, "I'm sorry," she said, beginning to walk backwards, "I can't leave here, my mother..."

"Relax Serala, I'm not asking you to come away with me. I can show you a model of it in the ship."

Her face visibly relaxed at this reassurance, and she took the arm he offered her to hold as they walked down the steep slope to the spot where the ship was parked. He had taken down a tree with his lightsaber last night after leaving the tree to provide a step tall enough for him to hoist himself inside, but Serela was so short she needed his help just getting on top of the stump he had used before needing more help getting into the ship.

At one point she had lost her grip and slipped, falling down into his arms without much grace at all.

"Sorry," she said, standing on her own two feet and looking embarrassed.

Kylo's put her more at ease, bending down and grabbing her legs, lifting her up before she could think twice and suddenly she was climbing into the cockpit of the TIE.

Kylo hopped in with much more ease than she had, and gestured for her to take the small cramped seat, showing her the controls and buttons, explaining as he went what each one did. He motioned for her to look at a screen where he pulled up the model of the Finalizer he had promised to show her.

He laughed when he showed her a diagram of the galaxy, pointing out the different planets and surprised to see how many of them she already knew. Her hand held onto the joystick pretending to direct the ship and he carefully placed the helmet on her head, showing her what each of the pieces for it did.

"Amazing," she said, taking it all in. He wanted to respond that this was nothing, that he could show her things 100 times more interesting and incredible if she would just leave with him, but he knew that now was not the time to ask yet. She was still too wary of him, too mistrustful to agree to leave her planet with a stranger she had just met.

It wasn't until they had finished looking over every square inch of the ship in detail and were both back on the ground that she slapped her leg as she remembered, "Oh no! The children!"

He looked at her confused, "The children?"

She looked back in the direction of her village, "Mmmm," she had to think fast if she trusted him enough to see the way to where they lived, "Yes, I teach the village children their basic studies in the mornings after they finish their chores but today I completely forgot and-"

He held up his hands to let her know she could stop, "No need to worry, I understand. I can wait back at the tree until you're free again later." Serela looked both ways along the path, so torn on what she should do. To take him back or not to take him back?

She finally relented, grabbing his hand without thinking, "Come with me."

They set off at a light job, Kylo wondering just how far away it was that they were continuing at this pace. He had no previous experience with it but he thought running and wearing a dress seemed like two things not particularly suited to each other.

He tried to concentrate instead on keep to the path and the feeling of her hand in his own. Her small fingers wrapped around his large ones as she pulled him onward, leading him off the path and into a patch of ferns.

Her village had not been far at all from where he had searched, but it lay to the South of Maz Kanata's castle, and he had searched every direction but that in his hunt for her.

Serela had made them take the 'back way' as she called it to avoid being seen, skirting the outer rim of their yard and pulling Kylo along, careful to bend low when they passed by areas that her mother might see them.

The children were waiting for her at the barn when they arrived.

"We thought you weren't coming!"

Bending low, she hugged them and explained that she had run late because of her friend, and they all looked over her shoulder to stare at Kylo standing there in his imposing black robes.

"Who are YOU?" the children asked excitedly. Some came closer to him to get a better look, many more stayed back, clutching at her skirt in fear of this stranger.

What's your name one?" of the older boys asked Kylo, catching him off guard. It had been a long time since he had been around small children. A _very_ long time.

"My name is Kylo," he answered, feeling very awkward right now. Serela smiled at him warmly, making him feel a little bit better.

She instructed all the children to pull up a chair, which he watched and realised by chairs she meant chopped pieces of a tree that had been cut to the right size to serve almost like a stool for them. He tried to find one around his size but nothing was tall enough and he tried to sit on one of the small ones at first, his knees comically up near his shoulders, until he opted to sit on the ground.

The children all laughed at his dilemma, and instead of getting angry, he laughed with them. It was rather funny, after all, the see a grown man trying to sit in something made for a child 1/3 his size.

Serela took them through their alphabet and numbers, and they sang songs with her Kylo had not heard since he was a small boy at his parents table with a tutor. She told them stories they had all heard 100 times but they loved to hear her tell them again, her voice changing for each character and acting out the funny parts with her arms. When she dismissed them to play, and find their own way home, most wanted to stay behind and play with her and Kylo.

Unsure of what to do, he looked to her for cues on how to handle the barrage of requests.

"Pick me up!"

"Spin me around!"

"Here, Kylo! Catch!"

Barely, he caught the ball thrown directly towards his face with his gloved hands, and threw it back, watching the children scatter as they each ran for a place that he could take turns throwing it to to them.

It felt like a few short minutes was all he had spent there, laughing and joking with the kids and Serela, forgetting for a few moments that he was Kylo Ren, Lord Commander of the First Order, and he could just be an ordinary man, playing catch in the woods with the girl he liked and her protégés.

They were all having so much fun that the group had never noticed the sound of Reha's light footsteps making their way up to the barn with a treat she had made for them before they left for home. By the time Serela heard the cries of "Ms. Reha! Ms. Reha! Look! Serela brought a friend today!" it was too late for her to hide him.

Kylo and Serela both turned to see her mother standing 10ft away, a basket of muffins on her arm and an ashen face attached to a shaking body.


	12. XII The Fight

Kylo stood outside the front door of her cottage in the late afternoon light, leaning against the wall outside and taking in his surrounding while the two women inside argued.

He noticed the clothesline from his vision all those years ago, still hanging from the same place. It felt surreal to be here now, to not only see the person he'd thought of constantly for years, but to also see her here, in her natural habitat, the place he had always seen her at in his thoughts and dreams.

Inside, the environment was much less peaceful.

"How can you be so dismissive of him without knowing him at all?"

"Because I thought you were off making eyes with some village boy. I never thought that you could be so reckless!"

"How is it so reckless to follow my own heart? You of all people were the one who raised me to do that! If my heart says to trust him, and if the Light occupies more of my heart than most people like you said, then shouldn't that be enough?"

Reha threw her hands up into the air, exasperated. "You are too young to understand, too innocent, too pure. I raised you that way, here away from all the corruption that I could, so that you could have the things I didn't! So you could grow up to marry someone and raise your own children in the Light, not to be the pawn of some servant of the Dark!"

"How can you say that when you've barely spoken 2 words to him?" Serela cried in frustration, "You raised me to be kind and forgiving and accepting of everyone, and yet you've left him standing outside like a stray dog!"

Reha paused, knowing her daughter had a point with that, but then she changed the subject, "He will hurt you."

"He has never tried to hurt me!"

"But he will!" her mother hissed at her, lowering her voice at the reminder that he was probably standing directly outside the window listening to everything they said between them.

Serela's crestfallen face blinked at her mother through the tears, "Please... PLEASE mother, just get to know him, let him come in and eat with us. The woman who raised me would have never turned away a guest. She would welcome him in to sit at our table and eat our food, and she would get to know him for who he is, not as he appears."

Her mother turned away from her for a moment to compose herself, but instead found that she had tears of her own to shed.

"He will try to take you away from me," she whispered, crossing her arms over her chest.

"What?" Serela asked, moving closer to bridge the distance her mother had left between them,and wrapping her arms around her mother's shoulders. "Mother, I'm not going anywhere, my place is here, with you. On Takodana."

She rested her head on her mother's shoulder and felt one of her tears drip onto the back of her hand. Reha took the other hand in her own and kissed it, holding it there as if to remind herself that her daughter was still here, right now she was here with her, in the house Titus had built for them, on the only planet she'd ever known, and even though she saw in her own heart that Serela's words were not true, although she could not know it herself yet, Reha clung to her hand as if she could will away the future that was to come. To somehow alter the course.

But she knew enough to understand that she could not.

"I do not promise to like him, or to accept him, but I will not turn away a hungry guest. You may let him in, and he may sleep here tonight IF he agrees to take the loft in the barn."

She barely had time to catch her daughter's smile before she flung open the door and ran out to retrieve him.

Dinner was moderately awkward, with Kylo complimenting the food and Reha giving short, one-word answers to most of his questions.

Serela beamed at him from beneath her lashes and her mother noted how close he sat to her daughter on the bench they shared. Yes, there was definite attraction there, and had he been anyone other than a leader for the First Order, she would likely have relished his attention towards her daughter, but he _was_ a leader for the First Order, and judging by his dress and demeanor, a very important one at that.

Reha tried to fake a smile for Serela's sake, hoping that he would be gone in the morning as he said and leave her daughter alone here, forgetting her as he returned to his ship, and never returning to disrupt their lives again.

When they had finished supper both women cleared the plates and Reha watched Kylo's eyes as they followed Serela's every move around the room, _much like a predator waiting for the right moment to make the kill,_ she thought.

The two young ones stayed on the bench at the table talking after everything had been cleared away, and Reha accepted Kylo's thanks again for a wonderful home-cooked meal, telling her that he had no idea who was responsible for cooking on his ship, but it could never hold a candle to her food.

Clearly unaffected by his comments, she went to sit in her normal rocking chair beside the fire, looking forlornly at Serela's empty one across from here, a fact lost on Serela, but not on Kylo.

An hour later, still deep in conversation, Reha stood from the gradually darkening hearth fire and stated simply, "It's time for us to be in bed, Serela, if you could show our guest to his lodgings."

Her daughter started to argue that it was still early when Kylo interrupted, "Your mother is right, I've imposed enough on your hospitality for the day. It's high time I retired for the evening."

Disappointed, but still glad for the last few minutes she could share with him, Serela gathered the spare blankets they had, their seams threadbare from years of use, but still warm.

In the last few rays of sunlight she walked back up the path with him to the barn where he'd had his first impromptu meeting with her mother this morning, the memory of her red-faced and furious still lodged in both their minds.

An old wooden staircase led to the loft in the top of the barn, and Serela chattered on about how it wasn't as cozy as the cottage, but they had just gotten more hay laid up here a month ago so it should all be clean and hopefully it would be more comfortable than sleeping upright in the seat of his ship.

A window in the loft allotted enough moonlight to illuminate their faces in the darkness of the barn, and when she finally handed him the blankets she felt his hand cup underneath hers, his eyes searching hers as if to ask if it was okay.

Her blood warmed at the contact as he came in closer, and briefly she was sure he was about to kiss her, her first kiss. Then the blankets were in his arms and he was laying them down, trying to form the loose hay into something comfortable for the night.

"Well...goodnight then," she mumbled, feeling rather foolish. After all, she barely knew him, it's not like she wanted him to kiss her, right?

Then how come when he had first taken his mask off in the woods yesterday after saving her life, she looked into his face and immediately felt like she _knew_ him from somewhere, or perhaps that she had _always_ known him.

But that was silly, she had never know of the existence of any man named Kylo Ren until yesterday.

"Goodnight," came his reply, using a vague tone she couldn't quite figure out.

Serela descended the stairs one at a time instead of the regular two at once, holding onto the wall for guidance, but also hoping that he might say one last thing to her before she left. Perhaps give her some indication that he really wasn't pulling her leg.

As she exited the barn she headed for the path and leaned against the nearest tree, breathing deeply of these woods and the cool night around her. It was foolish to think that there was anything there with him, he was a leader among his people, and she was a bastard daughter of a dead Senator on a feral planet in the Outer Rim.

So why did she still feel such a pull towards him?

On their journey up here to the barn he repeated what he had told her mother at supper about leaving to return to his ship tomorrow, but this time he told her it must be early, and he would be waking at first light to make the trek back to his ship. He had asked if she would walk back with him to see him off, and she had said 'yes'.

Warmed by this thought, she closed the door behind her as she reentered the cottage, glancing to the fire to see her mother still sitting in the rocking chair, pretending to be engrossed in her needlework even though Serela knew she never stayed up so late and was only doing it to make sure her daughter made it home.

"I'm back safe," she assured her, smiling in her mother's direction, only to be met with another serious look.

"That boy spells trouble for you my love, no matter how handsome he is or how much he flatters."

Miffed, Serela swept back her hair over her shoulder and stroked it thoughtfully, "I know you do not like him, but I believe him, and I believe my heart, which tells me that deep down he is good."

"Deep down we all have some good in us. There is Light and Dark in every person Serela, First Order or not. The difference is that the people he works for try everything in their power to stamp out the first, in order to leave more room for the second. Ask him how many people he's killed tomorrow, if you don't believe me."

Serela stiffened, "I will," she said, "But as he told you at dinner, he's leaving in the morning, so I doubt he'll be returning here one way or another."

Before her mother could make any more remarks Serela strode across the dirt floor to her bedroom door, mumbling a hasty goodnight before shutting the door behind her, leaving her mother to turn over that last sentence in her head.

 _He's leaving in the morning, so I doubt he'll be returning here one way or another._

If only Reha could believe that were true.


	13. XIII The Proposal

Kylo woke at first light as he'd said he would, still unused to being awakened by the sunlight after months aboard a ship in the middle of space.

He stretched his limbs in the hay and noticed how well rested he felt, surprisingly considering the bed he'd slept on here versus on the ship.

Rising quickly, he had left the barn and headed down the path heading straight for Serela's cottage, wasting no time.

When he knocked at the door Serela had been the one to open it, smiling sheepishly with bleary-eyes, clearly fresh from waking up. She pecked her mother on the cheek who regarded him warily and wished him a halfhearted 'safe travels,' before concentrating on kneading the dough rolled out on the table in front of her.

Serela grabbed a basket, the same she'd been carrying the morning he'd first seen her, and followed him on the door, shutting it softly behind her.

All night before sleep claimed him he had mulled over what he would say to her, how he would try and convince her to return with him this morning, not wanting to alarm her, but not wanting to leave her with any doubt about his intentions.

Snoke had sent him here with instructions to retrieve her without delay, but as they walked along in peaceful, companionable silence, he reminded himself of what he had decided last night. He would not take her by force, if she was going to come with him eventually, it must be of her own free will or not at all.

Strange, he noted, that for a man so accustomed to taking whatever he wanted whenever he wanted, he would waver now on this most important of missions. Here was the girl he had spent 15 years waiting to find, looking for her in every face he passed, searching for her in crowded streets and distant planets, always looking, searching, waiting.

And now he was about to leave here without her.

Serela held the question her mother had posed to her last night and turned it over in her mind, weighing his possible answers and their implications. To think that he had never killed anyone was unlikely, and very foolish. While she did not know much about the First Order, she was aware they were well known for their ruthlessness and brutality.

Once Kylo's ship came into view they both noted that the other seemed to walk slower, as if trying to stave off the moment they would have to separate, likely, in her mind, forever.

When they finally stood before it and Serela looked up at the pilot's seat she had sat with him in yesterday, she did not notice that now he was staring at her, his eyes in earnest.

"Here," she said abruptly, thrusting the basket towards him, "Take this for the trip back."

Curious, Kylo looked inside, finding a piece of fruits, two rolls and some cheese. A meal for the journey home.

There was a small piece of blue inside too, the flower she'd worn behind her ear yesterday.

Heartened by this display of affection, he finally chanced to ask what he had come all this way to accomplish.

"Serela, come with me," he asked, "You could leave this place and come to my ship. I know it would be different, but there would be so much you could do there, so many people to meet and places to see... and we could spend every day together... as friends."

She paused, that last part told her she was right, he must only see her as a young girl from an undomesticated planet, feral and untamed here in her land of wild forest and deep lakes.

"I...can't. I'm needed here Kylo, my mother, the children, my village..."

"What if I need you?" he asked pointedly, and she felt the conversation suddenly seem to crackle with electricity.

"Then you know where to find me," she answered resolutely.

His disappointment was clear, but brief. He forced a smile, then told her, "True, I suppose I will have to return very soon then."

She gave a weak laugh, hoping against hope that he was serious and not just trying to make a joke at her. Lana had told her that sometimes boys only pretended to like girls to see if they could get them to like them back.

"Well..." she offered, "Our village festival is in two weeks time, if you came back for that you could see me dance."

"You dance?" he asked quizzically.

She nodded happily, "I love it, I'm responsible for creating the routine for all the young women in the village. If you came..."

"I'll be there," he interjected before she could finish, and she grinned.

He turned to the ship as if about to climb up when he stopped, thinking better of it now, and turning back towards her, stepping in closer and waiting to see how she would react.

Serela's heart paced rapidly, the air between them feeling heavy with the tension. It had felt like this last night in the barn, when he had touched her hand and she thought he might kiss her, but hadn't. Was this going to be a repeat of that?

His fingers found her chin and lifted it up so he could look into those fascinating eyes again. He tried to memorise the pattern of blue, green and hazel irises, but found that he had something far more important he wanted to do.

Her body was suddenly pulled gently against his chest and she felt his lips on hers, moving softly.

A kiss. Her first kiss.

Kylo pulled away quickly, not wanting to linger if she was unreceptive, but he looked down at a dazed woman trying to find her bearings after a shock. Momentarily worried that his action was unwelcome, he was about to apologise when she looked up at him with the biggest smile he had seen so far from her.

"I'll definitely be back now," he said, brushing her hair behind her ear, "So I can have the chance to do that again."

Serela blushed so deep she knew her face must be redder than the sun, and he took the profferred basket and climbed up quickly, settling himself into the pilot's seat and waving at her as he readied it to launch. He gave her a thumbs up as he strapped in and reapplied his helmet, before pressing the button which made the ship begin to hover.

She watched the TIE fighter rise up through the trees, leaving deep marks in the soil from where it had landed, and she felt a wistful feeling in her heart that she had not taken him up on his offer to leave. Still, she could not abandon her mother and Takodana. This was her home, and for all his wonderfulness, Serela did not think a place on board a ship known for serving the powers of the Dark side was anywhere she wanted to be.

Serela had not asked the question her mother had posed to her, in the midst of the sadness she felt in her heart at his departure, she realised she did not want to know.

Upon his arrival back at the Finalizer, Kylo Ren stuffed the basket into a small compartment in the TIE fighter, resolving to come back later when the place wasn't swimming with storm troopers and dispose of it.

The thought of throwing away the reminder of such a heartfelt gift however filled him with trepidation, he did not want to have something destroyed which she had given him, no matter how trivial.

Even now, he did not realise, he could not even comprehend how much being in her presence these last few days had changed his demeanor. It was not obvious to him how different he felt until he passed General Hux in the hall on the way to his rooms.

"Kylo Ren," he addressed him snidely, "How nice to see you've returned. Finally. Did you acquire what the Supreme Leader wanted?"

"Not yet," he told him, his temper already beginning to rise again, a wild feeling after so many days of peace and rest.

Hux gave a snake-like smile, "How very disappointing. I look forward to hearing how you will explain your failure to Supreme Leader Snoke."

Turning on his heel and not waiting for a response, Hux marched onwards, clearly feeling smug with this new information.

As much as Kylo wanted to return to his chambers and reattain his bearings after the time away, he knew if he wanted Snoke to respond well to his decision not to bring her back with him, he better deliver the news to him before Hux did.

Unfortunately for him, Hux was faster.

"Ren, what's this?" Snoke's massive hologram asked him as he entered the throne room, "Hux tells me you've returned from Takodana empty-handed. Tell me this isn't true, where is the girl?"

"Supreme Leader, I can explain..."

"It seems not only is Kylo Ren incapable of retrieving vital information from the first female he found on Takodana, but now he seems incapable of finding any woman at all," Hux remarked coolly.

Glaring at him, Kylo opened his mouth to speak, but Snoke interrupted him.

"If Kylo Ren returned without the girl I trust he has a good reason for it. Were you unable to find her Ren? Did she elude you again?"

"No, Supreme Leader."

"Then what happened?"

Kylo searched his brain for a good enough reason to justify leaving her on a planet after spending two days earning her trust, "The timing was not right," he stated simply.

Snoke and Hux both stared at him, clearly very skeptical.

"You mean to say," Hux began, "That you found her, spoke with her, had _every_ opportunity to capture her and bring her here, and you _did not?_ "

"And how would _you_ have done it General Hux, please enlighten me."

"We are the First Order Ren, we do not negotiate. I would have offered it to her the easy way or the hard way. But either way she would be standing here right now."

"And if I had dragged her here against her will kicking and screaming she would have been much more determined not to turn to our side!" Kylo snapped at Hux, who glared back at him with unconcealed menace.

"Children," Snoke derided them, "Cease this bickering. Kylo Ren is right to assume she would be much harder to turn if she's brought in by force, but," he turned his attention back to Kylo, "You seem to imply there is another way."

"I could work on her, Supreme Leader, seduce her to the Dark Side slowly, then bring her here of her own free will."

Hux gave a loud snort as if he had never heard anything so funny in his life.

Now it was Snoke and Ren's turn to glare at him in unison.

"What? I'm sorry Supreme Leader but it seems highly preposterous that a man of Kylo Ren's renowned... um... _temperament_ could keep level-headed enough to _seduce_ any woman to any side."

A growl emitted from Kylo's throat, fantasizing about plunging his lightsaber deep into Hux's gut and watching his insides spill out here on the floor of the throne room.

"Watch your tongue General Hux, your jealousy over Kylo Ren's position does you no credit. The First Order is like a well-oiled machine, we need all the pieces working in unison, not competition, in order to achieve greatness."

Kylo lowered his head to hide his smirk as Hux's chastisement.

"I assume you plan to visit again," Snoke addressed Kylo, ending his self-satisfied musing.

"Yes, Supreme Leader, I plan to return within a fortnight, hopefully with the girl, but if not, I doubt it would take many more visits for her to be willing to accompany me here."

"That's not a very specific number Ren, I have no patience to be kept waiting for months over this. I need a definite timetable if I am to allow this, and it had better not be a long one."

"One month," Kylo promised, "If she is not prepared to come by my third visit I will bring her here by force."

"As you have said it," Snoke replied, "See that it is done."


	14. XIV The Festival

The two weeks following Kylo's visit passed treacherously slow for Serela.

Everyday she woke and went about her chores and errands, teaching the children, tilling the garden, preparing the food and consuming it, and everyday she looked around every corner hoping that when she id Kylo would be back early and ready to kiss her again.

She still flushed with a mixture of embarrassment and excitement when she recalled the kiss. Based on what she had been told by Lana and other village girls, the one they had shared was quite chaste. Knowing this still didn't stop her from fantasizing about repeating the act, the thought leaving her with an unfamiliar warm, tingly feeling all over.

Reha still avoided the topic of Kylo in general as much as possible, offering her opinion infrequently unless asked for it. In many ways, life had resumed the same as it had been before.

That morning he had left with Serela she'd watched from the window the entire time, from the door shutting and them taking a path through the ferns, to her daughter finally, thankfully returning an hour or so later, her face still red.

She had been so worried, watching Serela walk off with him, knowing what her daughter had told her, but still knowing even deeper in her heart that she could not foresee the future. While her daughter might be possibly the purest Child of Light in existence, she could still be a fallible human being, blinded by her emotions and the brown eyes of a cute boy, regardless of his obvious unsuitability.

Serela walked around the cottage and her surroundings in a dreamlike state, flitting from place to place with the air of someone so overwhelmingly happy it permeated her every action.

Her lessons with the children were now filled with questions about him.

"How is Kylo?"

"When is Kylo coming back?"

"Will we see Kylo at the festival?"

She answered these same questions over and over again, always amused that the children were almost equally as excited about his return as she was.

As she and the young women of the village rehearsed their steps, _her_ steps, the importance of the festival took on new meaning for her. This was her chance to show him her home, and all the people in it, for him to see her planet and her people as more than untamed pioneers in a vast forestland.

"Someone must be excited for the festival in a few days," the women teased good-naturedly. Word spread fast in a village of this size and children are terrible at keeping in exciting news. By the time Kylo had flown off the morning after meeting the children everyone in the surrounding area had already known he was there.

Hoping to give him more anonymity in a sea of rustic folks, Serela had scrounged up some old clothes of her father's to help him also blend in on his infrequent visits. His Senator's robes would have been too auspicious in a place where most families had three sets of clothing to choose from, and upon his death her mother had packed the few shirts and pants she'd kept for him and put them in a box up in the barn, out of sight now that they were out of use.

Serela had uncovered the box, blowing the years of dust off the top before opening it to pull out the plain brown work clothes worn by so many men of Takodana. She held up the garments, trying to guess if they would fit Kylo. Her father had not been nearly as tall as him, and Kylo stood almost a full foot taller than Serela herself.

An old memory surfaced, of her hugging her father on his last visit here before word reached them of his death. It had been her 16th birthday and he'd managed to get away for two whole days, giving his wife some unknown excuse for what could call him away from his work and family for that long, but it had worked.

They had walked for hours together in the woods, her questioning him incessantly about his life on Naboo, his wife, her half-brothers and sister. His other daughter had made him a grandfather the year before, and she'd listened with rapt attention as he described the baby in detail, from her tiny fingers and toes to the way she held his thumb in her whole fist and blew bubbles with her spit.

She had hugged him when he left, a long, hard hug as he apologized for being away for 6 months this time, and promised that he would visit again sooner, 3 months at the most. He had died one month later, but she still remembered that visit and their final hug with such appreciation. As far as goodbyes went, although she did not have much experience with them, it had been a good one.

Her tree was still a refuge for her, and she meditated under it everyday, still consulting with her inner voice that Kylo had called 'the Force.' It almost felt to her that knowing the correct name for it now strengthened her connection to it. Every day as she sat there it was as if the air around her hummed with energy from the Light, seeping into her pores and filling her whole body til it felt fit to burst.

The day before the festival was the first time she considered that he might not come. The horrifying thought occurred to her as she looked in vain again outside her kitchen window that morning, hoping to see Kylo's tall, dark silhouette striding toward her front door with a smile.

Sighing, she sat down on the kitchen bench, pressing her cheek against the warm wood and trying not to leak a tear at the sudden bout of insecurity. She didn't want to misjudge him, but she didn't want to be naive either.

As she laid there with her head on the table, she reminded herself that she did not know him very well, and if he did not return, it might be the Light sparing her from something far worse than a broken heart. Even though she did not want to admit it to herself, her mother's admonition to ask him how many lives he had taken lingered in her mind, always at war with the Light part of him that she saw so clearly every time they were together.

Yes, she would survive without him if he did not come back, life could and would go on, and her mother would certainly be happier for it, but the question was, would Serela?

He landed the TIE fighter further away this time, trying to leave it closer to the ruins of the castle to give him the element of surprise, in case she was periodically checking his former spot for the ship.

The vibrant greenery fluttered all around him as he trekked through the forest, millions of leaves quivering wistfully in the breeze.

Kylo had left his mask in the ship, but in the absence of owning any clothes other than the black ensembles he wore everyday he had come in his normal robes.

Even though he had logged the coordinates of her cottage in case he had trouble finding it again, today he was able to follow the path from memory, retracing each of their steps with ease from the charred remains of his last makeshift parking spot to the ferns they had traipsed through in the space surrounding much of their homestead.

A flash of white caught his eyes as he neared the property, and as he came closer he saw it was Reha and Serela, their slender arms hanging up sheets on the clothesline. He smiled as the memory of his first vision flashed in front of him, Reha doting over a baby Serela whilst pinning the clothes on the line, her characteristically absent father standing nearby, there for one of his rare visits as his infant daughter cooed and babbled in a basket at his feet.

It was ironically Reha who saw him first. He watched as she seemed to say something out of the corner of her mouth to her daughter, and he saw Serela whirl around towards him, her eyes seeming to light up as she forgot about the sheet she was hanging and looked at him.

Kylo smiled and lifted his hand in a wave, already feeling the last two weeks of anger and darkness beginning to ebb away from him.

Surprising all three of them, Serela impulsively picked up her skirt and ran towards him, her long hair freshly unbraided that morning and bouncing as she did.

He wrapped his arms around her as soon as she reached him, holding her close against his chest and bending down to smell her hair. She smelled of new-tilled dirt, clean clothes and wildflowers; a heady combination.

Kylo wanted to kiss her again now, but knew that Reha was watching not so discreetly from behind one of the sheets. Instead, he opted to give her a warm smile, his insides melting a little when she took his hands into hers.

"Hi," she murmured, her cheek against his chest listening to the soft drumming of his heartbeat.

"Hi."

"I thought maybe you weren't coming," she admitted.

Alarmed, he looked down at her, "Am I too late? Did I miss it?"

Serela laughed, a beautiful sound, "No but I just started to worry after two weeks of not hearing from you."

Kylo released a sigh, holding her tighter to him, "I told you I would. I wouldn't have missed it for the world."

Releasing one hand but keeping the other firm in her grasp, she started to lead him back towards the cottage where he mother stood, hands on hips, waiting for them.

The rest of the late morning he spent helping the women in the kitchen, watching as they chopped, cut, measured and poured, and trying his own hand at mixing things to the right consistency as they instructed.

Reha told him that everyone who came to the festival from the village was supposed to bring one dish per adult in the family, and he noted with some guilt that they were making three things in the kitchen today: a plate of scones that tasted better than any pastry he had ever eaten in his life, a soup made of vegetables grown entirely from their garden, and a black pudding, which he couldn't help but feel was made to signify himself and his dark presence in their house and what Reha obviously viewed as a plague upon her daughter's life.

Serela and him did their best to ignore her mother's hostility toward him, and when the cooking was done and the laundry put away and the garden tended and all the chores Reha could possibly think up were done, they set out into the woods together for a long walk, talking and laughing more than either had done for weeks.

When they were far enough away from the cottage that they could no longer see her mother's shadow in the kitchen window staring off after them, he turned to face Serela and brought his hand to cup her cheek, "I missed you."

He wanted very much to kiss her again, and she wanted very much _to_ be kissed, but neither had wanted her mother to see them and sour the moment.

"I missed you too," she smiled up at him, waiting to see if he would do it.

He bent his head lower and pressed his forehead to hers. They were so close, and she could feel his warm breath on her face and his arms around her back, hugging her body to him tightly.

Serela bit her lip, wanting so badly for him to close the last few centimeters between them and kiss her like she had dreamed about every night these past two weeks. As they stood there, foreheads touching and her arms tentatively wrapping around his waist, the very air around them seemed to go still and quiet with the poignancy of the moment. It was as if all the woods were holding its collective breath, and when he finally kissed her it exhaled.

At first the kiss was gentle, sweet and chaste like the one before, and she had pressed herself against him out of sheer instinct, wanting only to be as close to him as humanely possible. Against her stomach she felt something hard that seemed to be growing larger, and she felt an exhilaration though she did not understand why or what it was, she only allowed her stomach to rub against it once more, to see if she could determine it.

Then something changed in Kylo. He deepened the kiss, and her world seemed to suddenly shift, as if being suddenly turned on its head with the force of his mouth. His tongue traced her lips and she parted her mouth in surprise, allowing it entrance. He proceeded to invade and devour her mouth with it, his hand on her cheek moving to the back of her head to hold herself to him as his other gripped her waist, a burgeoning need inside of him to take the moment even deeper, but knowing this was not the time or the place.

Reluctantly, he pulled his face away from her and held her face in his hands. Serela's lips were swollen and parted, looking as though she'd just been interrupted from a deeply pleasurable dream she was not ready to wake up from.

Both panting, Kylo used every bit of willpower he had to put his hands on her shoulders and back away from her for a second, trying to recompose himself before they did something rash.

Unsure of what to say, Serela looked to him to see how he would respond, wanting to kiss him again and feel her world turn over and over as she held on for dear life, but knowing that there was something deeper to the breathlessness they both felt, as though this were only a precursor to something much bigger and greater. Something much more powerful than just kissing.

"That was... incredible," Kylo finally spoke, his usual composure returning now. Once he knew he had himself under control he offered his gloved hand to her, pulling her close to him, but not too close.

"Yes," she breathed in agreement, still feeling dizzy.

"We should get back soon, before dark or your mother will worry and came chasing after us."

His light-hearted joke broke the tension and she laughed, squeezing his hand and following his lead as they turned back down the path towards the cottage, the last lights of day slowly fading behind them.

That night Reha made Kylo sleep in the barn again, and she had made sure Serela did not leave the house with him to walk there. She reminded her daughter that it was not as though he needed an escort anymore since he surely knew the way by now.

Perturbed, and disappointed at the thought of not getting another kiss, Serela stayed in her room, humming and stitching a needlework she had started last week, wanting to be in her own company for awhile she had explained.

Reha tried to tamp down the noise in her heart and head that said this visit would be somehow pivotal in her daughter's life. Something was about to shift the course of her future irrevocably, and although she wanted to stop her daughter with every fibre of her being from making a huge mistake, she remembered her own mother's words when she had told her she wanted to leave.

 _"Your father and I don't think it's a good idea for you to go."_

 _"But, Mother..."_

 _"BUT, you are a young woman now, and you must make a young woman's choice and a young woman's mistakes, but understand that they will come with a WOMAN'S consequences. The world will not give you mercy for mistakes because of your age, so think carefully through your choices and then be prepared to stand behind them come what may."_

The words which had rang so true for her, as she'd begun an affair with Titus, and decided to choose her daughter over her freedom, still resonated now.

Serela would have to make her own choices. A young woman's choices, and no matter what Reha did, sooner or later if her daughter was going to choose this dangerous man, she would choose him. Reha could do everything in her power to separate them, but at what cost? Perhaps the loss of her daughter.

As she peered through the open crack in her daughter's doorway she studied her beautiful face, deep in concentration with her work, but also clearly in distress. Reha could almost see the thoughts tumbling over and over in her daughter's mind as she covertly watched her.

When she finally retired to bed, she called goodnight from the kitchen and put out the fire in the hearth, listening for a goodnight from Serela as well which never came. She went to investigate and discovered her daughter already asleep, her body on top of the covers and her candle melted almost all the way down to the stick.

Shaking her head with a smile, she turned down the covers beneath her daughter and covered her with them, pinching the wick of the candle and casting out the last light in the room before returning to her own.

Lying there in bed, Reha resolved that tomorrow, she would do better in her interactions with Kylo. There was no way she would trust him, or indeed, even like him, but for her daughter's sake and whatever was to come from her relationship with him, she knew her daughter would need her to be there, and be strong for her.

And being strong was all she knew how to do.

The next day passed in a flurry of activity. From the moment they awoke, Serela and her mother busied themselves preparing things for the Festival. Serela's dress had to be fitted just right one last time, her hair double-checked for knots and the dancing flags and streamers inspected and approved before the show tonight.

Kylo walked down early, still in his characteristic black ensemble, and Serela remembered with delight that she had set aside her father's clothes for him. After some embarassed reluctance, Kylo agreed to try them on and Reha allowed him to use her room to change in.

He'd walked out and both the women had stared, noting just how different he looked in an outfit not entirely consisting of black. His pale skin in the basic brown tunic and loose-fitting pants seemed to warm under the earth tones, giving him a less intimidating appearance.

Even Reha seemed to warm up to him more.

"There, now you look more like a man and less like a harbinger of death."

Kylo smiled at the joke, looking down at himself and trying to remember the last time he had worn anything like this. It had certainly been years.

Soon they were walking to the village, Kylo pulling along the wagon carrying the food they had made, the costumes and dance props that Serela promised he would see in action when it came time to get dark.

The huts and other small cottages all lined the narrow streets and most were built very tightly together, the spaces between houses sometimes no longer than his height, but the children he'd seen her teach roamed the streets freely, weaving zig zag patterns along the road as they yelled out greetings to him and Serela, trying to catch each other in fierce games of tag.

"Kylo! You're wearing _regular_ clothes!"

"Serela, my mother made 5 loaves of bread for tonight, she said her hands are going to fall off."

"Are you going to dance with all the ladies of the town tonight?"

"When can we start eating."

Serela and Kylo laughed and smiled at each other knowingly at their unending questions, Reha watching from behind them as she walked beside the cart, observing their body language with each other.

The road through the village turned left toward a large opening shrouded by more trees and devoid of anything the middle but grass and a wide assortment of tall torches poking out of the ground in an intricate pattern, leaving one large circle in the middle where Serela informed him the performances and dancing would be.

Long tables were off to the side with benches ready for food to be placed on them and consumed in a matter of hours. It wasn't long before Kylo was recruited by a few of the village men to use his height to help hang up decorations, great large banners and strands of multi-colored pennants adorning the trees and giving the place a definite festive feel.

Reha and her daughter were hard at work with the other woman setting the tables, laying out dishes and utensils and the food that people brought more and more as the sun began to set. Within a few hours the tables were all filled with hungry faces of children and adults alike, all waiting for the blessing to be given so they could dig in.

When finally old Toger stood and gave the blessing, so many stomachs were rumbling and his voice was so soft and frail that most could not even hear it, but when those closest to him began to pick up their food and eat it set off a chain reaction down each of the tables as the people began to feast.

Children who ate their fill fast stood up to run and chase each other through the tables and torches, some coming to Serela asking to sit on her knee for awhile and she always obliged them, sometimes offering Kylo's knee if hers were both already full.

By the time dinner had finished they each had one child on each knee and Reha watched the shift in his appearance as he sat there with her daughter. This was a look at the kind of life she had wished for her, a life that radiated peace and goodness, love and a fruitful marriage filled with many children. Things she had hoped her daughter would choose, and yet her mother's words hung around her like a shroud, reminding her of the importance of allowing her to make her own choices, and to help her stand by them if she could.

When Kylo was distracted for a moment with something the children had said to him, she leaned over and whispered in her daughter's ear, "I will be staying in town tonight with the Papool's, you will have the cottage to yourself" she watched Serela as the meaning of her words sunk in, "Please make whatever choices you think you will look back on fondly and not with regret."

Her daughter's mouth looked at her agape for the briefest of seconds before one of the children snuggled onto her lap groaned in her sleep and she looked down at her tiny face deep in slumber. This, this was what she wanted. A life and a family with a man she loved, here on Takodana, or maybe even somewhere else eventually. She wanted the choices to be easy, for life to spread out before her in an obvious direction of which path to take, but she knew from her mother's words that life would show her no such path, she would have to discover it for herself.

Eventually the parents began to come and claim their children from Serela and Kylo's knees, taking the especially young ones like the small girl who had fallen asleep on Serela's shoulder home to put in bed before returning for the fun.

When the night was finally dark, and Kylo could only see the faces of the villages illuminated by the lines and rings of torches, he felt Serela slip away with a smile, "Watch for me," she whispered, and was gone.

The villagers began to rise from the tables, heading in the direction of the open area alive with light from the large bonfire they had built in the center. A few minutes later, a silence fell as everyone turned their attention to the largest ring of torches, and Kylo heard the low beating of a drum.

It's cadence thrummed through him rhythmically, it had been so long since he'd heard music of any kind. The sound of a second drum joined the first, and then the melodic chanting of many of the villagers, beginning to sing a song in a language he had never heard but they all seemed to know by heart.

Gradually, from between each of the torches, a ring of young women appeared and walked toward the centre in unison, their bare feet shuffling through the cool grass.

One of them went into the centre of the ring, and Kylo recognised it as Serela, her long hair and the firelight giving her a wild, tameless look as she stood strong and beautiful, the reflections of the fire glinting in her eyes.

"We, the people of Takodana, as servants of the Light, offer up this, our performance to the powers of the Light, and hope that it will bring honor to it's power and authority, in the lives of all who view it."

The drums had increased in meter throughout all this and at the end of her words they suddenly stopped, and the women in the circle all bowed low to the ground, Serela included.

It felt like minutes stretched on as they waited for the music to begin again, but the dancers were only increasing the tension, allowing the anticipating to build before the first beat sounded.

When the first heavy drum beat sounded, the women all sprang up, their arms lifted to the sky, their bodies poised as if temporarily in flight. As their feet reclaimed the ground beneath them the drums set off on a dangerous fast tempo, the women jumped and pranced and flew from side to side in such synchronization there were times when he lost track of which ones Serela was, as they spun in circles and their long hair flew around them like a cape.

From the neckline of their dresses the women plucked the colored scarves that Kylo had seen in the cart, and holding one end in each hands the women wove together in a tangled web of color and motion, their bodies subject to the whims of the music and the beat of the drums.

At last the tempo increased to such a rapid pace that it left little doubt the song was ending soon. The dance become more erratic, their motions a haze of moving limbs and flying colors. Finally, the music reached its crescendo, and the women sank back to the grass, their bodies motionless and still.

Applause rang out from what seemed like every corner, even the trees themselves seemed to be clapping as a strong breeze came through, rustling the leaves so hard they almost seemed to rattle on their branches.

As the women rose from their places new music began to play and the rest of the villagers began to join in, the circle quickly filling as people began to enjoy the festival for themselves now that their food had long since settled.

Serela came up to him, and looking at him smile, her mother's words came up unbidden in her mind.

 _I will be staying in town tonight... you will have the cottage to yourself._

She pulled him out into the circle and urged him to dance, which he tried without much success. Wanting to enjoy this moment she had with him, she laughed and stamped her feet in accordance with the beat, his deep eyes watching her every move with an almost reverence.

When Glaf the barman came out, offering free drinks of Ebla fresh from the Inner Rim to all who were of age and interested, Serela reached out for two and handed one to Kylo.

"Just this once," she grinned at him, and swigged the drink without much thought, relishing the way her blood seemed to be lit on fire as it filtered down her throat. It felt, she noted, much like it had when Kylo had kissed her in the woods yesterday before he had pulled away.

She paused then, and he noticed and brought his drink away from his lips, looking at her doubtfully, trying to read her mind.

Serela dropped her half empty cup on the grass and reached for his hand, "Come with me," she ordered, and he dropped his to obey her without delay.

 ** _Author's Note. GUYS, the next chapter with be smuttyyyy. If you don't like, skip it, I can promise you won't miss anything except a whole lot of getting down and dirty. If you've only been reading this waiting and hoping for smut, you're in luck, because I'm about to deliver._**

 ** _Also, please remember to star or comment on chapters that you like. I posted this a week ago on Wattpadd and in that time it's gotten 115 views. I posted it last night on and in less than 24 hours it's gone over 1000. (I mean, DAMN) While it's nice to be validated that there are other people out there nursing a big weakness for Kylo Ren in spite of his daddy issues, I'd appreciate so much a bit of validation that people are in fact reading because they like the story or hear their suggestions. Sooo that's it, rant over. Time to proofread the smut and post it! ;)_**


	15. XV The First

The trip from the village back to the cottage felt much shorter than usual. The Ebla in her system seemed to be humming through her veins as she held tight to Kylo's hand, guiding him down the path as if he couldn't have found the way himself.

When they rounded the corner and the cottage was in sight, Kylo reached for her and pulled her in close, kissing her the same way he had that first day in the woods. Gently and sweetly, but that soon gave way to firmness and passion.

She did not pull away, rather she marveled at how it felt kissing this man. For a woman who had never kissed anyone before a week ago, she thought this felt much nicer than it had been described for her by the village girls. His lips were soft and insistent, yet patient as he waited for her to reciprocate the passion before he tentatively moved his tongue into her mouth, exploring her more fully.

Serela's legs felt weak with the sensation, a strange energy that had nothing to do with the alcohol seemed to be filling her all the way to the brim, threatening to spill over at any second. Still innocent, she wasn't sure exactly what this was leading to, but she knew that whatever it was, she would not say no.

His arms wrapped around her back and held her to him so tightly she felt they were melting into one person. One hand found it's way to her neck and into her hair, the other ventured lower, gently rubbing her lower back in a way that made her feel so giddy. She smiled into the kiss, and she felt him break away, looking down at her with a grin.

"Let's go inside," she whispered against his lips.

With one fell swoop he scooped her up into his arms bridal style and carried her the last 100 yards to the cottage door, trying to resist putting her down and kissing her again.

At the door he set her on her feet long enough to open it, then threw her over his shoulder, relishing her laughter as he pulled it shut behind him.

In her room, she lit a candle and turned on her heel to see him approaching her with the biggest grin. He looked so happy right now, so carefree. It made her want to always make him this happy, to make him stay here, with her, forever.

He kissed her again, and she felt herself melting all over, clutching at his shirt without understanding why. He answered the unspoken question for her when he reached down and pulled his shirt off over his head, taking her face in his hands again and kissing her with such tenderness she felt that she would cry.

Serela's small hands touched his back, rubbing up and down and feeling the muscles there as he pulled her into him more. His mouth ventured down to her neck, holding her tightly against him so she couldn't move away as he tortured her earlobes with his tongue.

A loud moan escaped from her without warning and Serela looked at him in shock, her mouth hanging open. "What was that?" she asked worriedly, afraid she had done something unseemly.

Kylo laughed, and kissed her again softly, "That's a sign that I am doing very, very well," he murmured, switching his head to the other side to repeat the motion.

She found herself moaning again, but softer this time, now that she was prepared for the influx of pleasurable feelings his actions were generating.

He wanted to keep going, but first he had to make sure that she wanted this, that she wasn't just about to give herself to him in a drunken stupor only to wake and regret it in the morning. He had to be sure that when she gave herself to him, she would still wake up only wanting to be his.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked, trying not to imbue his words with anything that would force her into agreeing out of guilt.

"What is this?" she asked, feeling that she had a general idea of where this was going, but wanting confirmation of it from him before she agreed.

He stopped her from kissing his neck and held her face before him, "This is me. Wanting you. Wanting you to want me. Wanting to make love to you and show you more pleasure than you could have ever fathomed. Will you let me do that?"

Breathless, she looked into his eyes, dimly illuminated in the candlelight, and instead of speaking, answered him with her hands and her mouth.

It was his turn to moan when she licked his neck the same way he had done hers just moments before, snaking her hand around his waist to scratch his back pleasurably.

With a groan, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her towards the bed, hastening to kick off his shoes as he went.

Nervously, she started to pull down one of the straps of her dress, unsure of how she should do it or even if she should be the one doing it at all. Was the man supposed to undress the woman as well as himself, or did each person attend to their own clothing?

She scarcely had time to think about it before she felt his hands on her hips, gathering her skirt up into his big palms and pulling it over her head, left in nothing but her slip.

Kylo stepped back to look at her. The thin cotton slip was not elegant or flattering, but simple and reminded him of home. This home, the place he came to be with her. The place he would forsake both the Dark and Light side to be able to never leave, just stay here forever with her.

Serela slid down the straps from her shoulders and let the slip fall to her feet, baring herself completely to this man, still unsure of everything except that she wanted him, now and forever, if it were possible.

His mouth hung open now at the sight of her naked before him, "You are so beautiful," he groaned, pulling her to him in a hug momentarily, just wanting to take in everything about this moment with her.

Nervously, she looked at his pants to see if he was going to remove them as well, and he did obligingly, allowing her to see all of him as he saw her, perfect and desirable in every way.

Her eyes widened when she saw the size of him, she knew the logistics of what he was proposing, but the details of the actual process were a bit fuzzy for her. She couldn't imagine how that was ever going to fit inside her.

"Don't be worried," he promised, and moved his hands down her backside to cup her cheeks gently, squeezing them with another groan as she arched her back against him, feeling his erection poking against her stomach for the first time.

Kylo pulled down the blankets of the bed and laid her down on it, covering her body with light kisses and eliciting more small gasps and moans as he lavished attention on her breasts, taking each into his hands and mouth individually, spending a long time torturing her with the pleasure.

Throughout all of this Serela felt on the brink of tears. Everything was so wonderful, so intense, like nothing she'd ever felt before tonight. She both wanted him to stop and keep going forever, a juxtaposition of desires that she found so overwhelming and confusing.

Her hands wove their way into his hair and she felt one of his hands move lower, dipping his finger into her and curving it inside, rubbing on her inner wall with his thumb.

She cried out, embarrassed again but so overtaken with the sensations he was causing. He smiled at her reaction, half of her breast still in his mouth as he used his hand to work her into a frenzy, relishing how wet she was for him. How wet he had made her.

When he finally felt that he would burst if he did not take her, he lifted her up and laid himself down underneath her so she could sit on top of his lap, settling her legs on either side of his. This way she could take him in as fast or a slowly as she wanted her first time.

Hazy eyes looked at him wearily, as if she needed something so badly but she had no idea how to get it and could not imagine going much longer without it. He was only too happy to oblige.

"Are you ready?" he asked, and when she nodded, he gripped himself and positioned directly underneath her, placing his hands on her hips and slowly lowering her down.

Her face grimaced with the tightness and she felt the head *pop* as it entered her tight channel, but she seemed to bear it well and shook her head when he asked if he should stop. Ah, there was the barrier to her sex. He felt it now, taut and stretched across the final entrance, a momentary encumbrance that would likely hurt her, but there was nothing else to be done.

"Are you sure?" he asked one final time, though he did not think he could bear it if she gave any response other than the one she did.

"Yes, please Kylo."

He pulled her down fast, wanting the pain to be quick, and she arched her back, screaming in pain as he ripped through her virginity like a hot knife through butter. The tears came then, spilling hot and fast onto his chest as she bent forward and bit her lip against the pain.

He wrapped his arms around her and held her to his chest, in agony over the pain he'd caused her, shushing her and whispering soothing things in her ear as she waited for the pain to subside.

"I'm sorry. You're so beautiful. I'm so sorry. I love you."

He wasn't sure if she'd heard the last part, he had said it so quietly.

She picked up her head off his chest and looked at him in determination. The pain has lessened enough that she felt she could bear it now, and she leaned in to kiss him again, giving him silent permission to continue.

Kylo proceeded to roll her over, careful to keep himself inside of her but trying not to hurt her further.

Once he was directly over her, he kissed her again, looping his arms under hers to hold her as tightly against him as possible as he began to thrust.

Her cries of pain quickly changed into moans of pleasure, her inexperienced body succumbing to the masterful expertise of Kylo Ren.

His whole inside felt as though it was purring, and inwardly he gave smug look of satisfaction as he brought her to the brink of pleasure and finally sent her spiraling over, more tears spilling over the pillow as she came so hard she saw stars.

Finally, blissfully Kylo followed after, a pure animalistic groan erupting from him as he spilled himself inside her, waiting for what seemed like eons before he came down from his high.

He lay on top of her a while longer, kissing her all over her face and shoulders, tasting the salty tears still on her cheek from her climax.

Serela reached up and ran her fingers through his hair, feeling him gradually soften inside her and trying to process all these new feelings. Her mind was so jumbled, she wasn't even sure which way was up or down after that. He moved off of her and she felt such an unexpected sense of loss when he pulled out of her, as if she had been waiting her whole life for this night, and now she wanted to prolong and savour every moment, every feeling from it.

Still gasping for breath, she rested her head on Kylo's chest, stretching her arm over his stomach and squeezing him tightly against her, not ready for the physical contact to end.

Kylo lay still, staring overhead and trying to replay everything that had happened in his head, already smiling at the memories.

Before he drifted off to sleep, he heard her soft, faint voice just barely audible enough to make out the words.

"I love you too."


	16. XVI The News

It was becoming increasingly harder to get away from the Starkiller base for prolonged periods, and Kylo had taken to escaping just for half a day every week simply to have those few hours alone with Serela. Although he had told Supreme Leader Snoke he would have her convinced to come with him by his third trip that number had more than double now and he was no nearer to convincing her to leave Takodana. The plans for crushing the resistance and finding the remaining piece of the chart to Luke Skywalker had temporarily encompassed all conversations between him and the Supreme Leader, and so he told himself that if he was careful, he could continue to see her a little longer without anyone in the First Order being the wiser of it.

Of course this could not last for very long, and he wracked his brain day and night of ways to convince her that joining him and forsaking her home and family and upbringing to live amongst the Dark side was the right choice for her, but every plan he struggled feebly to come up with felt more ridiculous and doomed to fail than the next. Every time he would suggest it to her, usually after the lovemaking that preempted their conversations, when he thought she would be in the most obliging mood to agree to come away with him forever, but alas, she would never succumb.

Owing to her mother's presumed lack of outright support for their relationship, but at least acceptance of it, Kylo and Serela stayed together in the barn when he came for his visits. Her mother was hardly ignorant of why they wanted the privacy, but she always made sure to be far enough out of earshot when she saw the familiar black clothing pass by her window.

The biggest change though had occurred in her daughter: Serela seemed to emanate happiness, in a way she never had before. Of course, she had always been a happy girl, a child of the Light and all the goodness that exists in the galaxy, but this was something different. This was the happiness of love, of feeling secure and a permanent smile fixed upon your lips because every thought is of them.

Reha recognized it because she knew it well, it was the same way she had acted about Serela's father. A fact which made her very worried, as that had definitely not ended well. A visit here and there a couple times a month had turned into 6 months and then became only a few times a year. She dreaded the aftermath of her daughter's heartbreak if and when things ended disastrously with Kylo. He was a tortured soul, and while she had some sympathy for him, it was still not enough to want to sacrifice her daughter's health and happiness for the possibility of rehabilitating him. That could be someone else's job, not hers.

Serela seemed to see it different though, and for every time Kylo spent their visits trying to convince her to come with him to the base and join the Dark side once and for all, she would turn it back around on him, reminding him that the galaxy was a big place, and if he would finally return to the Light they could get far enough away to eventually be out of the First Order's domain.

It was during one of the longer periods Kylo was away the first time she suspected her condition. It had been 6 weeks since their first time together, and 2 weeks since his last visit. He had left reassuring her that this might be a more prolonged absence because he had some lengthy business to attend to, but that he would return as soon as possible to see her.

It had been one of the many mornings she laid in bed, awake and daydreaming about his next visit, when she felt the overpowering urge to vomit suddenly strike her. Bolting upright in bed, she dashed from the bedroom through the cottage and out into the yard, barely making it past the front door before she spilled the entire contents of her stomach, the remains of last nights dinner still not completely digested as it stared up at her from the ground.

Miserably, she began to walk back in, thinking that this was a fine time to get sick when Kylo could return to see her any day. Before she could make it back through the door though she felt the urge again, and turned to the right to retch directly into her mother's flower bed.

Now exhausted, she slumped down against the door frame, wondering if her mother was nearby or had run down to the village. She wasn't sure she could make it back inside now, feeling as weakened as she did from her episode.

Serela probably sat there at the door frame for about 20 minutes before her mother's footsteps could be heard coming down the path, and she stuck her head out to get her attention, only to find herself vomiting again onto the beautiful blooms.

Reha dropped her basket of eggs she had been collecting and ran to her daughter.

"What is it? What's wrong?" she asked, taking in her flushed face and appearance. When she bent down to help her up, Reha noticed the vomit in her flower bed and looked at her daughter, a grim expression written across her face as this confirmed what she'd long suspected, and now knew.

"Wha-What?" Serela managed to say, not comprehending.

Saying nothing, Reha helped her daughter to stand, then ushered her inside and back to bed, bringing her a bucket in case her food came back up again. Serela was so exhausted that she did not question anymore. Her mother covered her shaking body with blankets to ward off the chill of her clammy skin and waited until she had managed to fall back asleep before she stood, staring down at her beautiful daughter, worrying for her now more than ever.

For the briefest of moments, a dark shadow seemed to pass through her eyes, and her face hardened into an angry grimace before it changed to a sigh and a stream of silent tears that she wiped away on the back of her arm.

The feeling of a cold, wet rag on her forehead woke Serela from a fitful sleep, one filled with nightmares and men chasing her through the forest, intent on taking something from her she would rather die than give.

"Give it to us," they had said upon finally cornering her 10 against 1, "Give us the baby."

That was when she had looked down for the first time and seen the bump that grew.

She woke with a start, her mother's face bent over her as she switched the rag with another.

Gasping, Serela clutched at the sheets with one hand and grabbed her mother's arm for support with the other.

"Mother!" she rasped, trying to regulate her breathing and compose herself, "Mother, I-I'm..."

Her mother's eyes would not meet hers, "Yes," she said, wringing out the old rag into a small bucket, "I know."

"How?"

"It was only a matter of time," she stated, still avoiding her daughter's gaze, "You were very careless in regards to preventing this."

Shocked at the accusation, Serela could only splutter back, "But you never taught me anything in the way of preventing children, or even in the creating of them."

Reha's face looked doleful as she had to admit that her daughter was right, by Serela's age she had known all about the creating and preventing of children, but it still had not stopped her either.

"Forgive me, you're right," she said, then seemed to hesitate before she spoke her next words, finally deciding they needed to be said.

"I confess I thought about giving you the leaf of Andar," she told her matter-of-factly, no hint of humour in her voice.

"What?" her face paled, "Mother, how could you even think to do that?"

Reha sighed, "Because this road you've chosen is hard, harder than anything else you have ever done or will ever do. A child would forever tie you to this man and his tormented life, and I thought that the Light might forgive me if I tried to spare you from that."

"Without my consent?" she almost shouted at her. Who was this woman? What had happened to the mother who raised her, a child of Light, to always do what was right?

Reha sighed again, "As I said, I did not go through with it, only that the thought passed my mind when I realised your condition. I wanted to spare you from further pain down the road."

"You raised me in the Light! And yet you could actually consider what it is your saying?"

"I am not so pure as to never be tempted by the Dark. Only you are my dear, you're the only person I have ever met who so whole-heartedly pursues the Light, whatever the cost. I am not that person, and as a mother, perhaps one day you will understand the deep, desperate desire to protect your child before all other people."

Serela blinked repeatedly at her mother's words, trying to process all of them. This was too much. She was happy with Kylo, well and truly happy, and she was happy about this baby, but the fact that her mother could not be happy for them felt like a knife in her heart slowing twisting in circles. She felt the first tear of many slide down her face.

"Please leave me," she stated, and rolled onto her other side, facing the window and leaving her mother speechless.

Unaccustomed to her daughter ever being upset with her, but understanding the reason behind it, she stood and made for the door.

Before exiting, she gave one last piece of her advice, "Remember that I was once young and in love too, but your father was a much different man from Kylo. He sent us here to live a very lonely life because it was the most convenient for him, not us. I went along with it because I loved him so much, but no matter how patient I was, or how much I gave him, he never sacrificed for me or you half of what we sacrificed for him. I do not ever regret having you, because you are my world, but you must think carefully if my life here, alone on a planet with no family, is the same life you would want for your children."

Serela was just about to respond that she could think of no better life for her children than to grow up here on Takodana as she had, in the house he father had built for them, but when she turned around her mother had gone, and she laid her head back down, waiting for more fitful sleep to claim her.


	17. XVII The Choice

It had been 3 weeks since he had been to see her now, 3 weeks away from the warmth of her smile and her arms. Now though, he wasn't sure she would ever be able to look at him the same if he returned.

He glanced in the mirror at the deep red scar cut across his face just under his right eye. The evidence that he had lost in his battle with Rey, the girl captured in the pursuit of the droid, who had now escaped as well and was probably on her way to Luke Skywalker at this moment, perhaps already there.

The familiar urge to destroy something rose in his heart, but he relented, not having the energy to act destructively when he was so desperate to get back to Serela, to see her and hold her and make love to her again.

Recovery from his injuries was what had kept him away for so long, and he knew he had to get back soon somehow or she would be worried. The morning his doctor finally cleared him to leave the infirmary he had strode out with such haste they had all cowered in fear, worried he would see his face and try to repay the same look onto all of them.

Instead he went straight to his rooms, avoiding contact with anyone in the hopes of making a quick getaway. Likely, no one knew he was being released this morning, as the doctor had projected another week of recovery until he'd felt Kylo's invisible fingers around his neck and changed the timeline to 2 days. If Kylo could just get away for a few hours, he could see her and get back before anybody noticed.

Changing into a fresh set of his black robes, and donning his mask, he hurried down the hallways and corridors toward the aircraft landing bay, deliberately avoiding the eye contact with the few people he came in contact with. He took nothing else with him save for his lightsaber, it would be a short trip and he had not intention of arousing suspicion by looking as if he was packing for an overnight visit.

When he finally came to his familiar TIE fighter he walked in like he did not plan to be disturbed, as if daring anyone to say something to him.

Most of the stormtroopers milling around noticed him and seemed to bring their heads closer together to discuss his unexpected presence, but he marched up to the ship without any impediment and climbed up, situating himself in moments as the surrounding troopers looked on in curiosity.

"Isn't Lord Ren still in the infirmary?"

"Maybe he was released today."

"What on earth could be so important that he would immediately leave the second he was released?"

Their questions went unanswered as the TIE fighter slowly hummed and then rose, levitating in the air for a few moments before whizzing out, transferring to light speed the second it passed the safe boundaries around the base.

Within moments everyone was back to work, speculating amongst themselves as to where he had gone and why. None of them saw the shadow and burnt orange hair of General Hux watching from one of the doorways, surveying Kylo's clandestine escape with a smile.

After pulling out of lightspeed, Kylo watched as the familiar green and blue surface of Takodana appeared before him, wisps of clouds coating the atmosphere as he started to descend towards Serela's cottage.

He landed the fighter a little further away than normal, wanting to surprise her with his arrival after so many weeks away. It occurred to him too late that after such a long period away, he ought to have brought her a gift. Inwardly cursing himself at his thoughtlessness, he stopped along the way to pick a few wildflowers as a recompense for his absence.

A feeling of overwhelming peace came over him as the cottage came into view. There was the smoke rising from the chimney and Reha's flower bed adorning the front. In spite of the still lingering pain from his recovery, he smiled at the tranquility here, the only place he was able to find moments of peace within himself.

Approaching the front door, he saw movement in the kitchen window and knocked surreptitiously, hoping the figure in the window had been Serela and not her mother, who could still be close by. He did not want to alert her to his presence just yet if she was.

His heart dropped when the door opened with Reha standing there eyeing him in suspicion and some other emotion he could not read.

"Good morning Reha," he smiled as much as he dared, and looked over her shoulder to see Serela sitting in one of the rocking chairs in front of the fireplace, her hands in her lap and eyes closed peacefully.

"She's resting," came Reha's curt reply, what progress she seemed to have made in civility towards him seemed to have vanished, and she shuffled past him out the front door into the direction of the vegetable garden, not even looking over her shoulder to see if he went inside.

Irked by her ruder-than-usual reception of him, Kylo stepped in, shutting the door quietly behind him. A few steps of his long legs brought him in front of her and he crouched down to her level, taking her face softly into his gloved hands.

"My love," he whispered, "I'm here, I'm home."

Her eyes opened and her smile widened, the happiness seeming to glow from her every pore as she leaned forward to take him into her arms, resting her shoulder on his head. "I've missed you."

He felt tears prick the corners of his eyes at the sentiment, "I've missed you too," was his heartfelt reply.

She pulled away momentarily and her eyes took note of the scar, "Kylo, what happened?" her fingers lightly traced the mostly healed flesh, holding his face in her hands.

"It's nothing," he said, trying to block out the memories of the day it had happened, including one in particular. Before he could put it from his mind completely again he saw his father's body falling, a gaping hole in his chest as Kylo pulled his from the walkway, feigning indifference as he watched it's descent, inwardly dying inside.

She pulled him tightly back to her, not asking any more questions because her mind was filled with so much as well. Her nose breathed in the wonderful scent of him and enjoyed the soft motion of his fingers tracing patterns on her back, feeling the familiar tug towards the bedroom, but she stopped. There was news she must give him first, before anything else.

"Kylo...there is something I need to tell you."

His mouth found hers before she could continue and she kissed him back fervently, wanting nothing more than to let him carry her into her bedroom and make love to her for the first time in weeks. But the news needed to come first.

"Wait, Kylo, it's important," she chided him mildly, and he kissed her neck instead to give her lips free reign to talk.

"Kylo..." she started again, beginning to get lost in the sensations of his lips on her, and losing her resolve to tell him this important information before anything else.

She raised her fingers to his head and channeled the light inside of her, letting his own subconscious interweave itself with her own, and she focused on showing him the sound of her heartbeat and his. Impatient but curious, as Serela had never done this before, he paused and listened to the sound of their hearts beating one throb at a time, then he felt, rather than heard her instruction to listen more carefully. As he did, he picked up the faint sound of something else. Another sound, the faint thumping of a third small heartbeat, pulsing in the middle of their interwoven psyches.

Released from the trance once she was satisfied he understood what she was telling him, he gaped at her wide-eyed and mouth hanging open, looking for further confirmation of what she had just shown him was true.

"A baby?" he breathed, the air rushing from his lungs as he recalled again the vision from so long ago. Her, as a woman, round with a child. His child.

"Are you happy?" she asked pleadingly, wanting so badly to hear affirmation that the only other person who knew of this was at least excited even if her mother was not.

"I...y-yes..." he stuttered, unable to grasp his emotions fully as he was still sifting through the implications of this new revelation.

The vision had told him that she would bring balance to the force. She, a child of the Light. But now he realised the vision had not been referring to her at all, but their child. A baby born of both Light and Dark, with two infinitely powerful parents strong with the force.

Their child could be one of the most powerful people who ever lived.

"YES," he grinned emphatically at her, pulling her tighter into his arms and squeezing her hard before she squeaked and he pulled away, "Oh no, did I hurt it?" he asked worriedly, glancing down at her still flat stomach in concern.

Serela laughed in spite of her exhaustion, "I don't think so, he's still very small at this point."

"You think it's a 'he'?"

She nodded, "I'm positive. I think we should name him Han, for your father."

His attention snapped up at the mention of his father, a tidal wave of tears rising up to unleash at any moment if she said the wrong thing next.

To hide it from her, he pulled her back towards him and rested her head on his shoulder again so he could wipe his eyes without her noticing, "We'll see," was his response, before he thought of something else, then asked the next question that came to his mind, "What did your mother say?"

She stiffened in his arms, extricating herself to lean back in the chair and let out a heavy sigh. "She told me she almost gave me powder to lose the baby."

The temper he had not felt rise to monumental proportions for weeks suddenly reared up so fiercely that he jumped to his feet, face flushed and body shaking, ready to head straight out the door and find her mother, striking her down for even thinking of killing their child.

Your son the Force inside him spoke wistfully, and he felt Serela's hands on his own frantically trying to bring him back down to her level, to calm him.

"She doesn't understand Kylo, how could she? She doesn't see the parts of you that I see. She doesn't know you for who you truly are."

"So she would kill our son!?" he shouted at her, breaking the peaceful feeling that had existed up until her last statement.

Her eyes looked desperate, brimming with tears and begging him to return to her, Please don't leave me for the dark right now he heard her plead with him.

His temper lessened at her words and he obliged her by stooping back down in front of her, trying to shake off the fury at her mother's reaction to their surprise, "How long..." he started to ask.

"Mother thinks I'm only about 2 months along, so there is still a ways to go," her bright eyes shone at him now, noting the way she had been able to calm him so quickly this time, to bring him out of the darkness within and back here, to her without a fight.

"I can't stay long," his apologetic tone sounded anguished as he stroked her hair with his hands and tucked it behind her ears, bringing her in for another kiss. When he pulled away she smiled at him with the look of a woman hopelessly in love, "Then we had better make the best of the time we have."

Hours later, when Kylo was reentering the orbit of the main ship, he immediately felt something was off.

A group of about 20 storm troopers stood in formation on the landing bay, clearly awaiting his arrival.

Upon exiting, he was approached by 4 of them, "Lord Ren," the first one said, "General Hux and Lord Snoke demand your presence immediately."

Ah, so this was it.

Led through the ship to room where they awaited him, he turned over the days events in his mind, mentally preparing for how to explain himself. As he was brought in now before Lord Snoke, he entered the doors and began the trek down the narrow walkway, noting that Hux was standing there in front of the throne like a confident predator, looking positively gleeful about something Kylo was sure he would not like.

"So...my young apprentice," Snoke began, his voice sounding dangerously composed, "General Hux tells me you were released from the medical bay this morning, yet when he went to your quarters to inquire as to your well being you were nowhere to be found."

"That's interesting Hux, considering you never once came to visit me during my recovery," Kylo quipped out the side of his mouth.

"SILENCE!" Snoke's roar echoed through the columns of the rooms, leaving both the men before him standing straight and compliant.

"Upon further investigation, it seems you vacated the ship today in favor of gallivanting across the galaxy for another rendezvous on Takodana with your Light-loving whore."

Kylo's eyes grew so wide at the way Snoke described Serela that he almost felt himself reach for his lightsaber, wanting to slash holes in the hologram but knowing it would do no good.

"So it is true," Snoke ascertained, "You have gone back to her again. Perhaps more times than this, indeed many more than we had agreed upon before you would abandon this charade and bring her here against her will. I sense a great divide forming in your allegiance to our cause Ren, a great disturbance in the Force."

Hux looked over at Kylo with a pointed expression, clearly enjoying the fact that he had finally found something which could be the undoing of his chief competition.

"Normally, I would just have her killed, but because she is so powerful I must still hold out the hope that she can be turned, assuming she had someone equally powerful enough to accomplish this," his words held clear implication, You are not powerful enough Ren. "Yet there is something else too, something you're not telling me, and I would know what it is before you leave this room."

Kylo tried to shut his mind like a steel trap, but Snoke was much too powerful to be thwarted for long by that. A gasp, and a low hiss were the only sounds he needed to hear to know that Snoke had found what he was looking for at last.

"A child?" the hologram asked incredulously, and Hux snapped his head forward to stare at Snoke as he spoke as if skeptical that his words were true.

"This is... very fortuitous news Kylo Ren, very fortuitous, I must congratulate you."

"Thank you, Master," Kylo answered through gritted teeth.

"While this is unexpected, this babe could be exactly what we need."

A muscle suddenly began to spasm in Kylo's neck at the notion of his child being used for anything.

"This child will be born of both strong Light and strong Dark, we cannot allow it to be raised anywhere but here with us as part of the First Order. You will train your babe from the time it can walk in the ways of the Dark side, and then we will be too powerful for anyone in the galaxy to stop us."

Kylo shifted on his feet uncomfortably, although he liked the idea of having Serela and their baby with him here at all times, he knew she would never agree to it.

"Then you must make her agree Ren," Snoke was reading his mind again, "Bring her here to me by tomorrow, by will or by force. No more arguing with her or trying to persuade her. She cannot be allowed to stay on that festering planet any longer when she carries within her such an important weapon. You will bring her here until the babe is born, then she must either convert the Dark or die."


	18. XVIII The Disaster

Serela was still in bed, the pregnancy leaving her more sick and exhausted today than usual, when she heard Kylo burst through the front door and rolled over.

"Serela!" he called, and her mother turned around from the stove in fright, dropping the dish she had been cooking with a smash onto the floor, scattering in pieces.

"Kylo, what is the meaning of this?" she cried, as he barreled through to open Serela's bedroom door.

She gave him a weak smile as he approached, noting his disheveled appearance and the anxious look in his eyes, "We need to leave," he told her matter-of-factly, ignoring Reha's sharp intake of breath.

His words were met with a yawn, "5 more minutes," she told him, rolling back over.

Kylo sat down on the bed and grabbed her roughly, "Serela!" he cried, almost shaking her, "You have to get up _right now_."

"Whyyyy..." she mumbled, still half asleep from the medicine her mother had given her to quell the nausea, after swearing to her daughter for 10 minutes on everything she held most dear that it was not something which could harm the baby.

He stifled a groan, he had flown out as early as he could manage, his forced promise to Snoke still ringing in his ears and an uneasy feeling inside him saying that it would not be so easy as retrieving her and bringing her to the ship.

Anxious to get her up and moving in the direction of his TIE fighter, which he had actually parked directly on the grass in front of the cottage this time, he bent over and slung her arm over his shoulder, lifting her bridal style and carrying her out of bed into the living room.

Reha was waiting.

"I DEMAND YOU PUT MY DAUGHTER DOWN AT ONCE!"

Kylo narrowly avoided allowing his temper to get the best of him and sending her flying into the brick wall by the hearth. This was the last thing he felt like doing right now with her.

"Listen," he told her, "I know you don't like me, trust me or appreciate my presence in your daughter's life, but believe me when I tell you that if I don't get her off my planet and onto my ship by tonight you and everyone you know in your village will likely die. Regardless of what you think or feel about me, WE NEED TO GO _NOW_."

Reha's face drained of colour and she slumped down to the bench at her kitchen table. This was what she had known would happen, not this moment specifically, but something like it. Her daughter's connection to this man had finally put her life and the lives of all those around her in peril.

Serela stirred in his arms when he had finished speaking. "Go? Go where? I'm not leaving Takodana," she said dismissively, nuzzling her face into the crook of his arm, the groggy effects of the medicine refusing to wear off yet.

He gave Reha a pointed look as if to say, _Wait and see if you don't believe me,_ and as much as she didn't _want_ to believe him in that moment, she _did_.

"When will they be here?" she asked, helping Kylo to open the front door leading outside.

"It could be tonight, or in an hour, or even a few minutes," his feet plodded towards the black TIE fighter marring the face of their yard, the clothesline cut in half and buried underneath one of the wings of the ship.

Reha nodded, hating this but knowing she absolutely did not want her daughter here when the First Order came.

Kylo tried to shake her awake gently and then set her on her feet, "Are you alright love? Can you walk?" he asked.

Wobbly still on her feet, Serela nodded and tried to bring her hands up to his face, "Kylo, I can't leave. My place is here, you know this."

His temper had finally reached its zenith.

"Yes! I know this place is your world, your home and your safety, but right now I have to worry about you and our baby and I'm telling you that there is no safety here for you anymore! The only chance you have for any safety right now," he pointed with his index finger to the TIE fighter, "Is to come with me in that ship!"

A whistling sound pierced the air around them before suddenly his TIE fighter exploded, a great ball of fire in the cockpit rising up and licking at the branches of the trees as Kylo's black command shuttle hovered overhead before beginning its descent to the ground.

"They're here! Get inside!" he ordered.

Serela, now unquestionably awake, but still groggy, stumbled back in the direction of her front door, her feet tripping so many times that Kylo and Reha both lifted one of her arms over their shoulders and dragged her back inside with them, slamming the door.

The sound of his shuttle landing on the hard ground outside put terror into his heart as he realised Hux and Snoke had never intended to give him a chance to bring her back himself. He was now deemed untrustworthy in their eyes, and they likely thought if given the chance to put her in the TIE fighter he would have fled elsewhere in a pathetic attempt to keep her safe, when the best way to have done that would be to never have searched her out, dragging her into his mess.

The hiss of the hatch door from the shuttle opening outside left Serela groping at Kylo's robes, trying to hold herself steady on her feet as the familiar nausea began to take hold again intermixed with her fear, "Kylo...wha-what do we do?"

The sound of hundreds of feet marching drained the color from Serela's face further.

"You must leave," he told Reha, looking from her daughter's face to hers, "For your own safety. Climb out a window in the back where they won't see you."

"I'll be damned if I'm leaving my daughter!" she cried.

 _"Go!"_ she heard him command her mother, and the tone of his voice finally sounded like the man Reha had always told her he was, powerful and used to being obeyed. "They'll never kill Serela because of the baby, but they won't hesitate to kill you, _it's why they came_."

Both women looked at him in horror as his words sunk in.

"It's time to come out Ren," General Hux's shout could be heard from outside, "You won't like it if we have to come in."

Tears blurred her vision as Reha was faced with making an impossible decision with haste. "Goodbye, my love," she pulled her daughter into a tight hug, "Stay safe and may the Light ever be your constant guide," she repeated the words she'd spoken to her before bed every night for so many years. The tears came unbidden to Serela's eyes.

Then she felt her mother tugging away and Kylo pulling them apart, dragging Serela with him out the front door to the front of the house.

There was Hux, surrounded by a few hundred storm troopers, all lined up in perfect formation, waiting for them.

"Smart choice, Ren."

A line of 6 storm troopers stepped forward and lowered their blaster rifles at the house.

"Since your whore thinks she is too good to join our ranks and leave her childhood home, we have no choice but to level it," Hux smiled maliciously before lowering his arm to give the order.

Bullets rained down on the house, shooting holes through every wall and the roof, catching fire in seconds as Serela screamed for her mother who was still inside and undoubtedly had not had time to escape.

Kylo held her back as she tried with everything she had to run back inside, to find her mother, to save her, but there was nothing she could do. The 20 years old structure burned like a match once light and in no time at all began to cave in on itself, the bricks and mortar melting with the heat of the smoldering roof atop them.

Serela's face and hair were covered with smoke and ash, her cheeks with tears as she watched the only home she'd ever known descend in flames, taking with it her mother, her best friend, the person who had known this would happen, that her daughter would bring disaster down upon them.

Behind her, Kylo's arms slackened when it was clear there was nothing left to run back for. Her old toys, her sewing, her few meager belongings were all destroyed, lost forever in a blaze because she had decided to trust the Light in Kylo, but what Light could there truly be in a man who consorted with people like this?

He tried to hold her, to make her wrap her arms around him for comfort as he shh'd her sobs and stroked her hair, but she would not have it. She pulled away from his touch, falling to her knees in the yard she had stood in every day of her life and covered her face with her hands, trying to block out everything that had happened.

Hux gestured for two storm troopers to step forward, and each grabbed one of her arms, lifting her up and dragging her to the command shuttle. Too exhausted to put up a fight, Serela hung limply in their arms, the trauma finally causing her to black out.

Knowing there was nothing he could do, there were too many to fight off by himself, Kylo followed behind, telling himself Hux would pay for this with his life.

As if on cue, Hux appeared beside him, walking beside the sullen figure with a noticeable pep in his step.

"You probably think this was entirely my idea Ren, and no doubt you're planning some harsh plot for revenge in that shaggy-haired head of yours, but just remember, Supreme Leader Snoke was the one who gave the final go ahead. He saw the wisdom of my plan and its purpose; to finally turn your whore to the Dark side and join us."

Although they were surrounded on all sides by marching storm troopers, Ren looked over and pushed Hux out of the line, using his hands instead of the Force to hold him in a chokehold.

"Don't...call her...a whore..." he seethed, his face clammy with fury and sweat.

"Hard pill to swallow, eh Ren?" he gasped, clearly too full of himself to even stop talking when his life was on the line, "Your Master, your Supreme Leader ordered the destruction of everything this girl held dear, all because you had to go and get her pregnant, then be too much of a coward to drag her to our base yourself."

Kylo released his hold slightly, lowering Hux back onto the ground.

"Don't think I will forget this Hux," he warned, marching back into the ship.

Hux readjusted his uniform and looked at Kylo's retreating back as it disappeared inside the shuttle.

"Neither will I," he gloated, to no one but himself.


	19. XIX The Interrogation

Serela came to in a strange room, full of walls made of metal and bright electric lights above her. A persistent humming seemed to emanate from everywhere around her, the walls, the lights, the floor beneath her. It was unnerving. Immediately she tried to sit up only to find that she was held on a cold, metal contraption halfway between a chair and a table. Steel bands held her down against it, and she shook them helplessly, trying to glance around the rest of the room for some hope of escape.

She felt herself beginning to hyperventilate, and she tried to calm down, reminding herself that it was bad for the baby, but the reality of her situation was sinking in and she was terrified.

A beeping sound behind her started to go off and she tried harder to turn and see what it was, straining her wrists against the steel holdings, hurting them with the effort but desperate to see what that noise was.

The doors facing her SWOOSHED open within seconds of the beeping and she turned to see the red-haired man from before, recalling his presence outside her cottage as they had opened fire on it, burning it to the ground within minutes while she screamed for her mother as Kylo held her back from running inside.

"Serela? Is that right?" he asked her.

She didn't look at him. Although she wasn't sure where Kylo was, she knew he couldn't be far. These were his people, they must be, therefore it must be a mistake that she had ended up in here. Kylo would set it right soon, and then he would come for her.

"You're probably wondering where Kylo Ren is," he suggested offhandedly, and watched as her eyes finally met his.

"Well," he started, drawing out the word in such a way that it was clear he thought talking to her was beneath him.

 _Then why come here and explain anything at all._

"You see, Kylo Ren is in a lot of trouble because of you."

Her heart sped up, the sick feeling in her stomach returning with a vengeance as he paced around her.

"You see, Kylo was supposed to convert you, bring you over to our side. But he failed."

She laid her head back against the headrest, suddenly feeling so exhausted and nauseous that she had to close her eyes, that was until she felt his hands on her.

"He was suppose to convert you to the Dark side," he murmured, lifting the hem of her shirt to lightly rub her stomach, "Instead he got you pregnant." He gave a tsk tsk noise at that, then leered at her with a smile, "Not really part of his orders you see."

Serela felt even more sickened at the feeling of his clammy hand on her belly, and she worried that she might actually vomit while strapped to this thing if they didn't let her go.

"Please," she finally spoke, "Please, let me off of this, I need to be able to move, it's not good for the baby."

"What makes you think I care two shits about what is good for _Kylo Ren's_ bastard?"

He moved his face in close to hers, relishing how she shook in fear at his close proximity, "But that's right, you're a bastard yourself aren't you Serela?"

Hux reached into a pocket in his uniform jacket and pulled out a paper. "Serela of Takodana," he read, "Born to Reha of Takodana, no husband of record."

He folded the paper back up and replaced it in the pocket where he had pulled it from, then leaned back in with his mouth directly next to her ear, his hot breath only increasing her urge to vomit, "It says no father of record," he hissed, "So who _is_ your father Serela of Takodana? What man poked your whore of a mother long enough to give her a child to raise in the wilderness of the Outer Rim? Who is he?"

She didn't respond, telling herself he probably already knew the answer and was just in this for the entertainment of torturing her. Her head turned away from him and she felt a lone tear slide down the side of her cheek.

Hux wouldn't let her avoid him though, and his face appeared on the other side or her, snarling so closely with his next words that their noses touched, "Do you know why you're even still alive right now Serela? Supreme Leader Snoke wants that baby inside of you for the Dark side. When it's born, or ready to be, we'll cut that bastard from you and leave you to bled out on the operating table before dumping your body back on the same cesspool you were born in."

She couldn't help it then, she opened her mouth and vomited everywhere, hitting Hux in the face and spilling all over his pristine, polished black boots.

Hux's shock and disgust gave way to anger. "BITCH!" he screamed, slapping her face so hard her whole head turned to the other side. Terrified as to what he would do next, she braced herself when she heard the door SWOOSH open again, just as Hux was about to bring his hand down on her once more.

"General Hux," a silver plated storm trooper entered and surveyed the situation through her mask, "The Supreme Leader requests your presence immediately."

He brought a hand up to his face and attempted to wipe the sick from his cheek, looking from the residue on his hand and back to Serela as if he were thinking about dealing one more blow.

"General," the figure redirected his attention.

With a last groan of disgust, Hux spun on the heel of his vomit-covered boot and made for the door. It wasn't until she heard it close behind him that Serela finally let herself unleash the waterworks in force.

She wept hard, hot, fat tears that streamed down her face in such rapid succession she felt them coating her cheeks in moments. The evidence of her retching on Hux still dribbling out of the side of her mouth. More than anything she wished she could reach up her hand to wipe it away.

Serela had expected this new storm trooper to leave, but she stood there in the doorway in the same spot she'd been in since she delivered the summons to General Hux. Not sure if she was staying here on orders, or simply to enjoy watching the brutality of the situation in front of her, Serela continued her sobbing, crying as hard as her body would allow until everything hurt, and she started to cough violently from the smoke still in her throat and the lack of water.

"Are you finished?" the metallic uniformed woman asked.

Sniffling, Serela's head slumped back and she gave a faint nod. The woman approached, careful not to step in the puddle of sick at her feet.

Pressing a button somewhere behind her, the beeping sound that Serela had completely lost notice of suddenly stopped, and the bonds holding her down loosened. No matter though, she was so sick she had no energy left to try and escape even if the opportunity presented itself.

"You cannot allow yourself to get worked up like this," she chided Serela, "It's bad for your baby."

"So is being tortured and held captive after seeing your home and village destroyed, and your mother probably dead."

Her rescuer said nothing, pressing more buttons behind her which brought the contraption she had been bond to down in a horizontal position.

"So you can sleep more comfortably," she explained at seeing Serela's silently questioning eyes.

Reminded of her mother the thoughtful gesture, she took a chance on posing a real question, "Do you have any children?"

"No," was the curt reply, and she took that as her hint to not ask anymore questions of her.

A moment later, and she felt a cool rag on her face, wiping the dried tears from her cheeks before removing the remains of the bile.

"My sister did," the storm trooper volunteered, "Bloody, messy business it was too."

Serela smiled in spite of herself, "So I've heard. Not looking forward to that part so much I'm afraid, assuming I even survive to see it." She looked up at the ceiling lights again, willing herself not to start crying all over.

"You will survive to see your child born," the woman's mechanical voice assured her, "It's what will come after that will be unpleasant for you."

Alarmed, yet relieved to know Hux's threats of cutting her son from her body had been empty, Serela's asked against her better judgment, "And what is that?"

"You will live long enough to deliver the child. If you agree to turn to the Dark side, you will see it grow up, take part in its life and training to become a great leader for our cause."

"If you refuse they will kill you."

Kylo had been meeting with Snoke while Serela was, unbeknownst to him, being tortured and interrogated by Hux.

"You've disappointed me, my young apprentice, I had not thought you so weak that you would be tempted from the Dark side by the pleasures of a mere woman."

He wanted to respond that he had not thought Snoke trusted him so little that he had sent a shuttle full of storm troopers led by General Hux to retrieve her, but instead his head hung low, listening to his verbal beating in submission. He could not even muster the usual anger which came so easily to him here in this place almost completely devoid of the Light. Now he was too concerned about Serela and the baby. The sooner he accepted Snoke's reprimands and terms for the future, the sooner he could go and retrieve her.

"The girl cannot be allowed to turn you from us Ren, we've worked too hard together to build what we have. Your power, your position all come from the Dark side."

"Yes master, I would never betray the Dark side for the Light. My allegiance is to the Dark alone."

Snoke fixed his gaze on Kylo skeptically, "What assurance can you give me of this?" he replied.

Kylo remained silent, straining his brain to think of what he could say that would please his Master, but coming up empty.

"Just as I thought..." Snoke's gravelly voice muttered, "You can make no guarantees because you yourself know what I say is true. The old Kylo Ren would have never hesitated to take what he wanted, what he was bidden by his Master to do. He would have never dragged out a command from his Supreme Leader over months what could have been done in hours if he had only had the strength to do it. The girl is too full of Light to be turned, and her influence has started to pull you away from us, which I cannot allow to continue."

"My Lord..."

"Therefore," his voice seethed, "It will be as we said before. She may stay here while she carries the child until she gives birth. If she will not turn in order to stay with it, the girl must die. You will raise your son or daughter as a servant of the Dark from birth, and take them on as your own apprentice when they come of age."

Even though he had known this ultimatum already, the weight of Snoke's demands now hit Kylo like a ton of bricks. But there was only one answer he could give.

"Yes Master."

Snoke sighed, leaning back against his throne in mock sympathy. "This gives me no pleasure Ren, believe me, but you and the child now are of paramount importance to the First Order and our cause. If I'm somehow wrong, which I doubt, and her love for you and the child can supersede that of her upbringing in the Light, then she may live, and remain here as your 'companion.'"

"You are gracious Supreme Leader, I will continue to do everything in my power to ensure that she is turned to our cause."

"No, my apprentice, you will not."

Kylo raised his head to look at the hologram again, perplexed.

"We cannot risk you being further corrupted to the Light by maintaining contact with her. Your time together will be very brief and infrequent until she gives birth. Perhaps the isolation from the father of her child will aid in persuading her to change."

Kylo swallowed, "How often will I be able to see her?"

"As of right now, not at all. You can escort her from the interoggation room to her chambers and say your goodbye, then submit yourself for reconditioining immediately. Make sure that she is well aware your absence will be due to her refusal to convert to the Dark. That may also help to change her mind faster."

With a wave of Snoke's hand, the doors behind Kylo opened and Captain Phasma entered, fresh from her trip to see and tend to Serela.

"You'll be relieved to know that Captain Phasma will be charged with her primary care and comfort, the babe is of too much important to be entrusted to anyone else."

Kylo tried to insist, "But Master, with your guidance _I_ could-"

"My _guidance_ is this, Ren, you will not be permitted to see her again after this final goodbye until you submit yourself for reconditioning and I am satisfied you are no longer in danger of letting her sway you from the Dark side. My decision is final."

Now he could feel the familiar stirrings of his temper beginning to boil deep within the pit of his stomach. He tried to picture the nearest place he could go and unleash his wrath with the lightsaber, not stopping until everything lay destroyed at his feet.

Yet as Phasma stood there staring straight ahead in her stoic manner at Snoke, and Snoke stared down at him unflinchingly, he knew this was an argument he could not win.

"I submit myself to your wise council and decision Supreme Leader."

"Good," the gruesome hologram almost smiled, "Report back to me for your reconditioning after you have escorted her with Captain Phasma."

Kylo bowed and turned to leave when Snoke's voice turned him back.

"Remember, my young apprentice, although you will be separated through much of the duration of her confinement _you_ have the best chance of persuading her to turn, for the sake of your _child_. Use her mother's love against her, _make her see_ that joining us is the only way to ensure she will live to see the baby grow to adulthood, _make sure you're convincing._ "

 _Author's Note: Okay, so I know that a lot of people are reading this based on my stats which is blowing my mind how high my numbers are on here versus on Wattpad where I've also been posting the story. I just dropped three chapters in one morning against my better judgment but I was just so excited that 've finally reached a point where the chapters I wrote for their relationship before and then after her capture could be joined. Basically writing The Festival took me a couple days. I've been working on this story for over a week now, and although I can see how many views I'm getting, it's really hard for me to know if people actually like the story or are just kind of following along out of boredom. I'm going to take few days break from posting until I can get about 10 comments. I don't want to be one of those lame review whores, but I do want to know what I'm doing wrong or right and if people consider the story and the characters to be believable or not (as believable as can be in a fictional universe ;)_

 _Thanks for reading guys!_


	20. XX The Goodbye

Phasma followed him down the hallway, allowing him to lead as he took the series of rights and lefts that led to the interrogation room she had been placed in.

When he finally walked in, the SWOOSH of the doors noticeably startled her, lying on the interrogation table now in a horizontal position, and she started to shake, looking at the door in a mix of fear and apprehension.

"It's me," he said without emotion, trying to ignore the rapid beating of his heart at seeing her like this and the overwhelming urge to rip the restraints off of her, then run out as fast as he could carry her to the landing bay.

But the mechanical breathing sound of Phasma behind him in the doorway reminded him without words that would be the most foolish thing he could do. He wouldn't even get her out of the restraints without being shot, for in his heart, he already knew that his unborn child held more promise in Snoke's eyes than himself, and if made to choose between the two it would be no choice at all.

Removing his helmet, Kylo strode over to stand beside her. Serela's eyes, red from crying, looked up at him pleadingly and she reached for his hand, which he gave her, but when she squeezed it for reassurance he could not squeeze it back.

Wishing that Phasma would give them the decency of a little privacy, Kylo nonetheless bent his head down low so they could speak softly, at least somewhat reducing their risk of being overhead here on a ship where everyone already knew their business.

"Hi," she whispered, her voice sounded hoarse. It was then he noticed a red mark on her cheek that looked like it had come from a hard slap. Looking down on the floor, he also noticed the puddle of sick still lying there where Hux had left it when he stormed out, opting to leave her in the room with the smell of it until she was moved to her permanent quarters.

"Who did this to you?" he cradled her face in his free hand, his thumb absently rubbing her cheek in silent affection.

He was so desperate for her to know how much he cherished her, how much the news he was about to deliver was just as crushing to him as it would be to her.

"The man with red hair came by to visit me," she answered him, and watched his face shift from concern to anger at the words. She had just given him all the information he needed as explanation for her injuries.

His eyes glazed over with hatred, "He did this to you?" he seethed through gritted teeth, already planning how he would repay him in full for today's events. It was one thing to target Kylo himself, but to go after the mother of his unborn child to get to Kylo... he would make him suffer relentlessly.

Serela's eyes watered again with the memories of Hux's assault, and hestroked her forehead, cursing himself not for the last time for bringing all of this on her. The vision he had never asked to see years ago had obsessed him in his quest to find her, but here now he had destroyed her life in so doing.

"My mother..." she began to say, but stopped when the fresh tears came, a strangled sob caught in her throat and threatening to tear its way out of her. Tears spilled out of her eyes finally like a dam being unleashed.

"Shhhh," he tried to comfort her, but she broke down crying right there on the table, her arms and legs still bound with him trying to console her.

"She's gone!" Serela moaned again and again through her heavy sobs, "She's gone, she's gone, she's gone!"

"I'm sorry," he whispered in her ear, but the action reminded her of Hux's lewd threats and she stiffened, turning her head away.

Startled by her response, Kylo gently turned her head back towards him and studied her face. Her normally bright eyes were dimmed here in this fluorescent lighting, her whole body seemed to sag against the table lifelessly, as if her will to live were draining away from her with every moment she was trapped in here.

"Please Kylo," she begged, "Please get me out of this place. I don't want to be in here. It's not good for the baby."

He swallowed, bracing himself for what he had to tell her now, but his mouth felt dry and the words too difficult to form.

Trying his best to ignore Phasma behind him and Serela's obvious heartbreak, he struggled to find the cold, impassive voice he had used everyday before he had met her. This was not a time he wanted to be aloof, but Snoke's words resounded in the corners of his heart as a warning.

 _She must convert or die._

 _Make sure you're convincing._

Looking down into her innocent eyes it was almost laughable to think that he could have ever converted her to the Dark side. Even here, in the Darkness of this ship of the First Order, he could feel the slight tugging of the Light at the door to his heart, beckoning him back to it if only he would come. Although he had rare instances of temptation by the Light before Serela, he realised that he had never been so tempted before her. There had always been something else, a wall there in his heart that he had long since crossed over but from time to he would climb back up to the top and look back at where he had come from, a part of him longing wistfully for the days on the other side.

Kylo shook his head, Snoke was right, he _had_ been compromised. Now for the first time, he could actually feel his anger rising again, as it always had before her, but now he felt it brimming to the edge, directed at her and threatening to burst out of him involuntarily. It was so easy here to feel himself make the change back from Light to Dark. Even now in spite of her presence he could feel the hatred and anger burrowing away into his flesh to settle inside his heart, taking up residence as it tried to push out the Light that always crept in when he was with her.

 _The person you were on Takodana was another man's life,_ the Dark side seemed to scold him, _anyone could pretend to be of the Light for a time, but now your true colors will shine through. She will see you here, in your element, a force to be reckoned with, and she will witness your power and authority, succumbing to it or serving her purpose and die._

The venomous turn his thoughts had taken alarmed him and he almost stumbled back, holding onto her hand for balance as she gazed up expectantly, waiting and hoping that he was here to set her free.

"I can't," he breathed, trying to hold himself back from reverting into the monster he had found himself becoming again even in her presence.

"What's happening Kylo, why am I here? What do they want with the baby?"

He steeled himself to answer her questions, all the while aware of Phasma's listening ears which connected to her running mouth, most likely running all the way back to Hux and Snoke.

"Our baby will be the product of half Light, half Dark. Unusually powerful even from a young age. His name will be Darth Renor, and he will grow to be a powerful Sith Lord for the First Order."

Her dim eyes looked at him in horror, "We were going to name him Han, for your father," she whispered.

Alarmed that Phasma had overheard this, he tried to cover up the truth in her words with a lie.

"That was never the plan. Han Solo was a traitor and a smuggler, and I killed him weeks ago before I came to you and learned of the child."

Serela's mouth was agape, "You killed your own father? Our child's grandfather?" she asked horrified.

The more he allowed the words of the Dark side to flow through him now, the easier they came.

"Yes."

Her head fell back, her mind feeling as if it would explode with this revelation, and she finally found the words on her lips that her mother had told her to ask weeks ago.

"How many people have you killed Kylo?"

He seemed to hesitate, if only briefly, "Hundreds of thousands."

"Nooooooooo!" her screamed echoed throughout the room and into the rooms surrounding it with it's volume and power. Something deep inside her had snapped. Her heart was shattered, well and truly broken as she realised her mother may have been right all along. She had been a fool to only see the good in him, when the bad was lying just under the surface, waiting for the right moment to strike.

"I'm sorry this upsets you," he said, his voice devoid of emotion.

So many questions pounded in her head, the need for answers that only he could give, but the fear to ask any more questions if she wasn't prepared to accept any answer he might give. Except for one.

"What happens now?" she wept, and he bent down to take her face in his hands again like he had so many times before, and for a second she thought he was about to kiss her.

"Now, you must stay strong and healthy for our baby, and spend these months here deciding to whom your allegiance belongs, to the Light, or to our child and the Dark."

"You would never seriously let them kill me for refusing."

"I would not have a choice Serela. I am powerful here yes, more than almost anyone, but even I am only one man, one cog in the wheel that turns the galaxy in its quest for balance. When I saw you in a vision 15 years ago the Force told me that together we would balance it. With the arrival of our baby I intend to do just that."

"Raising him in darkness cannot be at all what the Force meant when it indicated balance! Kylo, you have to see reason here!" her pious voice irked him and he looked irritated with her, something she had never expected to see from him.

"You would not understand," he chastened, "You were raised too innocently and naive. The powers that turn the wheels of this universe will be served by what we have created together, our child will be more important than perhaps anyone who has ever lived. The Supreme Leader knows this and is determined to protect the baby from others who might wish to corrupt or harm it."

"You mean like me... and my mother?"

"Yes," he answered without a thought.

Reaching down to remove her restraints and help lift her into a sitting position on the table, she flinched away when he tried to touch her. Hurt, but unrepentant for the things he had said, Kylo looked at her and offered his hand.

"Come, Supreme Leader Snoke has instructed me escort you to your chambers where you will be staying indefinitely."

"You mean until the baby is born and you kill me?"

Kylo did not answer, when she did not take her proffered hand he turned on his heel and headed for the door, lifting his mask and putting it back on.

When he turned to her and she could not see his face, only the image of the man in black who had chased her through the woods months ago, she wanted to scream. Had her mother been right? Was this really who he was this whole time, only showing a facade to her in order to get what he wanted? What was it he truly wanted?

As she tried to stand on her own two feet for the first time in hours, she took one step and slipped in the vomit still sitting on the floor. Falling to her knees and catching herself with her hands, Serela saw Kylo's black boots walk up and she felt his strong hands lift her under the shoulders and pull her back up to standing.

"Come with me," he said, "There is more to tell you before I must leave."

They walked side by side down long hallways and corridors, no green to be seen anywhere. Every place Serela looked there was metal, metal, and more metal. No signs of life except the masked soldiers in white she had escaped from that first day he had seen her.

Captain Phasma followed in their wake, maintaining a close proximity to them in case Serela should try to do anything rash.

She did not however, after all, she had never been on a ship in her life, where would she even begin if she were to escape? Each hallway looked the same, every overhead light identical to the next and every soldier followed by another that could be it's twin. Even their heights appeared to be so close in stature that she would have a hard time telling any of them apart. Kylo and Phasma seemed to tower above them all, and she noted how the soldiers began to move jerkily, almost statue-like as they passed, as if afraid one wrong move would be the end of them.

Serela remembered that fear with Kylo, the second day he had chased her in the woods and saved her from a gory death on the rocks below the cliff. When he had taken his mask off for the first time and her heart jumped as if reunited with someone it had long ago known and sorely missed. Had it meant nothing, just a normal response for a girl to have towards a handsome, dangerous man?

"Your chambers will be adjacent to Captain Phasma's. You will spend your days and your evenings with her." Serela almost laughed at the idea of days and evenings, how could anyone know which was which on this ship?

"You will be visited by a First Order physician everyday and surveyed to ensure the health of the child and yourself as you carry it to term. Your meals will be delivered to you and you will not be permitted to leave your room until or unless Captain Phasma becomes satisfied that you do not intend to try and escape."

Serela turned to him, wanting to rip that mask off and scream at him, to rage and give into the Dark forces that even now seemed to snake their arms out of the walls and try to pull her towards it. She wanted to give into her anger and make him feel some measure of the suffering all this had brought upon her.

But she didn't.

"Where would I go Kylo? Where could I possibly go now? You burned my home and murdered my mother with it, my village is likely destroyed too. What could I possibly try and escape _to?"_

The mask appeared to regard her for a moment as if thinking of saying something, but they continued their walk and in a moment his mechanical voice spoke again, changing the subject.

"If at any time you decide you are willing to cooperate and join the Dark side, Captain Phasma will send word and you will be brought before Supreme Leader Snoke and myself to pledge yourself to our cause."

She snorted at that one, "As if that would ever happen."

Kylo's body noticeably stiffened at that, and she could see the tension in his shoulders as they rounded another corner and he finally stopped in front of a door, pressing a series of numbers until it SWOOSHED open.

Serela walked inside feeling almost defiant, if she was a naive fool, then it was because she had been fooled by a master manipulator.

Kylo stepped forward into the room, leaving Phasma out in the hall and shutting the doors behind him before she could think to enter with them.

"This is not how I would have chosen for this to go," his voice was softer now, even with the helmet.

"Then choose another path," she chided, "Choose me, and our child. Choose life instead of this death machine."

Shaking his head, he placed his hand on her face once more, and this time she did not cringe from the contact.

"I cannot. This is the life I chose long before I met you. I tried to tell you so many times, to bring you here with me of your own free will, until it became apparent that without the use of force you never would. What I'm doing right now is what I must in order to protect you and our child."

"You can't protect him murdering people and hiding your face behind a mask."

"No, but I can protect him by doing my duty and raising him as a father should raise his son."

"So one day he can grow up to kill you too, Kylo?"

A long, desperately slow silence followed, and then she heard the hum of his lightsaber and saw a flash as he turned to the wall and began slashing at it with everything in his body.

She fell back in alarm, crouching in the corner of the room near the bed while Kylo took out his anger on every piece of furniture he could find, reducing them to pieces as the angry red blade swung from one side to another.

When he finished, he retracted the blade and stood panting slightly, then looked at her with that horrible mask.

"Don't...EVER...mention...Han Solo...to me...AGAIN..."

Serela felt a wetness on her face that told her she had been crying while he destroyed her room, and when he stepped in her direction to offer her a hand to pull her up she refused, looking at him with new eyes.

"You lied to me about everything," she accused.

"Not everything, many things, but many things, yes, I did."

"Why?"

Exasperated, but still winded from his tantrum, Kylo snapped back, "Because I desired you Serela! Your body, your affection, those were all I ever wanted from you!" Even as the words left his mouth he knew they weren't true. The part of him he kept buried, the Light he struggled against constantly, it _had_ desired her, but for so much more than her body.

Her lips were pressed tight together in an effort to keep from screaming, and as he turned to leave, she stood up in her small untouched corner, yelling as he pressed the numbers to make the door open.

"Tell me it was _all_ a lie then Kylo! Tell me you were like this every moment I was with you and I was too young and stupid to see it. Tell me our baby and I mean nothing to you."

Even in the mask Kylo looked down at the floor, "I care for you Serela," he admitted, "But I am Kylo Ren, master of the Knights of Ren, and I am accountable to people for my actions. I will no longer allow my feelings towards you or our child to cloud my judgments."

He looked back up at her, and through the mask she could almost sense the stoic facial expression as he told her, "You and I both have choices to make. I have made mine. I have chosen the Dark side just as I chose it long ago. For your sake and our child's, I hope you make the same choice. I hope you choose him, and me." He turned to leave, Phasma standing at the door waiting for him.

"Kylo wait!" she cried, "Don't do this to me! To us! Our baby! This isn't who you are!" her voice had reached a fever pitch as she slumped to her knees on the hard metal floor.

"No Serela," he said unfeelingly, his eyes fixed on a point on the wall behind her, refusing to look at her face as he pushed the button to shut the door to her chambers, "This is exactly who I am. You can learn to accept it, or we and our child will have no future together."

 _ **Author's Note: Well there it is! The first 20 chapters done! I promise you that I have never in my life made it so far into a story before. Usually I get about 5 chapters in and then get distracted and/or give up. If only I could be this possessed to keep at my original fiction! lol.**_

 _ **Thanks to those who have been giving me constructive feedback and criticism since my last chapter. My mind is still blown that I'm topping over 4000 views (what the whaaaat?) I wanted to make sure I addressed what was brought up about Kylo seeming too nice, because I had questioned that myself in writing, but what I wanted to express and I hope this chapter was able to convey, is that my impression from the movie is that Kylo is very much a man 'torn apart' as he told his father just before killing him in the Force Awakens. Snoke and him discuss his temptation to the Light and since he was not brought up as a stormtrooper surrounded by the Dark side at every turn but rather the opposite, it makes sense that the longer he is away from it and in the presence of someone who possesses SO MUCH of the Light, that he would begin to revert (even if only those time when he is in her presence) back to the Light.**_

 _ **This is more than likely the halfway point for my story, although I'm not sure if it will be another 20 chapter exactly or 19 or 21 or whatever, but this is where the shift will begin. Now that they are together on the Finalizer, he will be in his element and it will be time to see if the change of environment has the same effect on her as being in her environment did on him. Uggggh I love writing this and even though I wish I could get even more people to give me an opinion on it I'm just happy to see so many people reading it, as it must mean I'm at least doing something right! Feel free to comment if you agree with my assessment of Kylo and your perception of his inner battle in the movie. I've just finished watching it for the 3rd time (of course I've rewatched just the scenes of him without his mask waaaaaay more times than that) and it feels more and more clear to me that he will definitely turn back to the Light like his grandfather in the final episode of the saga, if not sooner.**_

 _ **Ok, geekout over! Back to writing!**_


	21. XXI The Reconditioning

Whispers seemed to echo all around him as Kylo knelt in the ostensibly empty throne room with his eyes closed in meditation. Each one seemed to say something different.

 _Come back to the Light._

 _The Darkness holds the key to your power._

 _You know the way in which you should go._

 _Forsake her, she is nothing._

 _Make the right choice for your child._

On and on they went, yammering and jostling for attention in his mind as he tried to block everything out and listen for the Force, hoping it would speak to him clearly as it had all those years ago.

"So... my young apprentice, you have chosen well."

Kylo opened his eyes to see the hologram of Supreme Leader Snoke materialise in front of him.

"Yes, Master."

"How did the girl take it when she saw Kylo Ren in all his glory for the first time."

His heart swelled with unconscious pride at the word _glory_ , but he responded minimally. "Not well."

"I see. And were you convincing? Did you make it abundantly clear that she has no chance for survival outside converting to the Dark?"

"Yes, Master. I left her without any doubt about it."

"Good," Snoke smiled genially, the expression looking foreign and unnatural on his grotesquely misshapen face.

"What next, Master? When do I start my reconditioning? When can I be free of this pull toward the Light that she causes in me?"

"Soon, my young apprentice, soon. Your reconditioning must take place over many phases. The next time you see her she will hold no sway over you, and her power will begin to diminish over time. Both with you and overall. Gradually as she is surrounded here by servants of the Dark side, her strong power in the Light will begin to sap away, and then you will be ready to convert her once and for all."

Kylo looked up at Snoke's face and for the first time saw him as he really was, a powerful, evil man bent on corrupting all who crossed his path in his quest to rule the galaxy. When Kylo was younger and struggling with the pull of the Dark, Snoke had found him, sought him out and used a young boy's loneliness and confusion against him, manipulating his emotions and promising power and glory, giving him a sense of place and purpose in the midst of feeling like just another would-be Jedi under his uncle's tutelage.

Why now though, did he sense these things and finally begin to feel anger at this tyrant's manipulation of a little boy? Why not sooner? He had been angry with his parents when they sent him away against his will. His mother had been busy with her role rebuilding the Empire, and his father with her. His childhood had been a happy one, all until he had been sent away from them, left to process all the things a son should have his father to help guide him through alone, or with his uncle.

Luke had seen the evidence of his corruption early, he had sensed it almost from the start. Kylo knew it by the way Luke had looked at him, watching his every move as you would a snake in the grass, readying yourself for when it would strike. He had been 18, still almost a child when Snoke had instructed him to take the Knights of Ren and massacre all his uncle's padawans, down to the very last child, and Luke Skywalker last of all.

Kylo had failed in this final piece, and now that girl Rey had undoubtedly reached his uncle, cooking up some plot for which he needed to be prepared, but how could he be when suddenly he was accosted by all these doubts and regrets, threatening to swallow him whole?

"I have been remiss in my failure to address the situation between the two of you sooner," Snoke articulated, "But you are not so far gone from the Dark as to be lost to us forever my apprentice. You have come here of your own free will, which means you recognise the problem and wish to rectify it, isn't that so?"

 _Do I?_ Kylo's mind asked him, looking figuratively over that wall he had crossed long ago back towards the rising sun, whereas the direction he was headed it was always setting. His old life had been the Light; he had chosen this Dark path, again and again. Serela awoke feelings in him he had long thought dormant which had been enjoyable to relive, _but_ he told himself, _that is not who you truly are. You are Kylo Ren, Master of the Knights of Ren. You possess more power than any Jedi since Darth Vader. Your skill is matchless, your talent limitless, only you can complete the work of your grandfather. Only you can finish what Darth Vader started._

 _"_ Yes, Master. I submit myself to you fully, tell me what I must do to be completely one with the Darkness, and I will do it." A niggling suspicion in his mind remained, but he crushed it. There was no going back to the past or the Light, the only way for him was forward, and that was further into the Darkness. Serela could join him if she wished, but he had come too far to be turned back now.

"Good, good," Snoke nodded, "I have devised a unique reconditioning method with the cooperation of General Hux. Report yourself to the medical bay immediately for further instruction.

Nervous at the idea that Hux had something to do with anything else to do with him or this situation, Kylo nevertheless rose and bowed to Snoke. "Yes Master, your bidding is my command."


	22. XXII The Imprisonment

Learning to adjust to life on board the Finalizer could only be but so difficult, for the first 2 months Serela was rarely let out of her chambers to adjust to anywhere else on the ship at all.

Used to running freely through the forest and the fields, Serela felt herself going stir crazy, left alone in a glorified cell with nothing but Phasma's silent, intimidating presence and her own thoughts to keep her company.

Of course, almost all of her thoughts were of Kylo.

Now that she had nothing else to distract her, she turned over every interaction they had shared, from the first time he had seen her and chased her through the woods to the morning he'd pulled her out of bed and carried her to the front yard where she had watched her only home burn to the ground with her mother inside.

Her mother, the woman who had given birth to her, who had raised her alone on a remote planet far away from the galaxy's corruption. Dead. Gone. Burned alive in the house she had made a home for 20 years with only her daughter for company. Every time Serela thought of Reha she felt a sick, tearing feeling in her stomach that had nothing to do with the baby, and everything to do with guilt. Reha had warned her, pleaded with her, tried in every way to persuade her against trusting Kylo, and Serela had ignored her every time, defending him and encouraging him to keep coming back. She had lost herself in the sensations of being wanted and adored, even if, she now thought, those had all been a farce from him.

Everyday a ship physician came to take her vitals, withdraw a small blood sample and listen to her chest. After the first month of this the physician confirmed that she had entered her 2nd trimester, and a piece of her heart twinged at the realisation that her mother had been right with the timing, Serela had gotten pregnant the night of the festival.

The day her physician confirmed she was out of the 1st trimester and left her alone with Phasma again, Serela finally spoke to her for the first time since that day in the interrogation room.

"Can we go somewhere?" she asked, hoping the unassuming way she posed the question would lend to the likelihood Phasma would answer in the affirmative.

Staring straight ahead at the same wall she looked at most of the time when she was in the room with Serela, Phasma gave no notice that she had even heard her until Serela heard, "And where would you like to go?"

"Oh, you know... around."

"Not possible."

"Why?"

Heaving a sigh, Phasma answered more specifically, "When Supreme Leader Snoke authorizes it, you may travel wherever you wish on board the ship."

Silence ensued as Serela tried to figure out what to say next.

"So he hasn't authorised it?" she asked lamely, and Phasma's helmet turned slowly towards her as if stunned by her stupidity.

"Could you ask him?" Serela continued, figuring if she was going to say something dumb she might as well go with it a bit more, "We're in the middle of space and I have no idea how to fly any kind of aircraft even if I wanted to try and escape. I just need to be able to stretch my legs, get some exercise for the baby." _Possibly see Kylo._

Phasma had resumed her traditional stance of sitting down and staring at the wall with her blaster sitting on her lap. She did not acknowledge Serela's last query.

"You would come with me anyway, so there's no chance of me getting away."

Still not answering, Phasma was staring at the wall, but Serela could feel, or almost sense that the wheels of her mind were turning over what she had said and considering it, so she decided to press her luck a bit further to seal the deal.

"I know everyone wants me to do what's the best for the baby while I'm here on board. I don't think being in a cell the entire day with no exercise is good for it. He might be born lethargic."

"You don't know if it's a boy yet, even the physician said it was too early to tell."

"Maybe," Serela replied, "But I can feel his presence inside of me, and it's entirely male. I wasn't 100% sure until a couple of weeks ago, but I felt him kick and somehow I just knew." Her eyes were filled with wonder at the memory, recalling how the doctor had just listened for her heartbeat and was leaving her chambers when Serela had felt it, the fluttering motion her mother had described to her when she'd asked what it felt like to have a baby in your tummy as a little girl.

 _Oh Mother, I wish you were here to help me with this._

"I will speak to the Supreme Leader and ask him this afternoon."

FINALLY. An answer she could work with. If only she had left it at that.

"Or, you could... you know... ask Kylo Ren."

"Kylo Ren is currently undergoing strenuous reconditioning. He will not be able to see you for many more months, and when you do see him again you will likely not recognise any part of him as the man you knew on Takodana."

Gulping, Serela abandoned all her attempts to make conversation, which she later concluded might have been exactly what Phasma wanted when she spoke the words that would keep her awake at night for weeks.

 _Reconditioning. What does that mean? What will he be like after it's done?_

She barely touched her food when it was delivered and Phasma was given a break by another stormtrooper to have her own meal elsewhere and presumably do whatever it was she did with her free time.

After she had been gone an hour or so, Phasma returned and the stormtrooper babysitting Serela stood to attention when she entered.

"You may leave us," she said, and he did.

Serela noted that Phasma did not resume her normal seat by the door and begin staring blankly ahead at the wall again this time.

"Supreme Leader Snoke has agreed that you should be given free reign of the ship when, and only when, you are in my company. He wants for me to show you all the levels of the ship so you will see the place your child will grow up without you if you continue to refuse his generous offer to grant you your life in exchange for forsaking the Light."

"Wow. Well, when you put it like that..."

"Furthermore, he would like me to take you to see Kylo Ren."

Her heart skipped a beat, and she wondered if it was the baby excited at the prospect of seeing his father or her.

She hastened to get up and put on her slippers. The floors here were so cold she could never be without them except when she sat on her bed or bathed. Indeed, everything about the ship was cold and unfeeling. Her body was so used to the balmy Takodana air that she usually sat in her meditation pose on the bed with a blanket wrapped around her for warmth. She assumed it must be very hot for all these soldiers in heavy uniforms and so it was kept intentionally cold, but for her everything felt like ice.

The day he had brought her to her chambers and destroyed half the room, they had to find other accommodations for her, putting her in a slightly smaller one with a tiny lavatory attached and a table with one chair in it. Phasma usually took the chair since almost every moment she was not asleep or eating Serela was in a meditative pose on her bed, eschewing any prolonged contact with the strange floor and surroundings. She had stubbornly refused to bathe for almost a week until Phasma had threatened to strip her down herself. Relenting, Serela had taken a shower for the first time in her life, marveling at the lack of a tub to bathe in and the scalding temperature of the water.

Serela had been loathe to remove her dress, her last remaining tie to her planet which had to be removed to bathe, but she had done so at last and tried to hide her grief when she came out to find basic black clothing folded and waiting for her on the bed.

"When can I have my dress back?" she'd asked Phasma.

"That rag has been taken to the incinerator. From now on while you are here you will wear the clothes provided to you by the First Order."

She had nodded her head in understanding, wanting to cry and lash out but knowing that it would do no good. This was just one of the many consequences of not listening to her mother all those months ago.

The black clothes they provided her fit loosely, as if they were made with someone two sizes larger than her in mind, and the sleeves dangled over her hands with their length, the bottoms of the pants pooling at her feet. Her long hair she wore freely, no braids or other attempts at making it better or worse. She simply existed her, a prisoner waiting for her taste of freedom or death, whichever came first.

With her slippers on and her oversized black garments hanging from her like a skeleton, Phasma directed her to follow and the doors opened to reveal the same hallway she had walked down with Kylo the day he had brought her here.

Phasma led Serela down the same series of halls, giving no indication that she noticed any of the fellow storm troopers they passed as she escorted a young girl whose clothes were so huge she kept tripping on her pants as they walked.

It took a couple of hours for Phasma to show her each of the levels. She pointed out the control room where Serela stood in a corner near the entrance, trying her best to remain unseen as soon as she saw the red hair she had come to associate with danger and pain. They had seen one of the many cafeterias where the ship's crew took their meals, and many other places which Serela barely noticed because she was too busy looking around every corner for Kylo.

She'd had a long number of weeks to think about what she would say when she saw him; she'd contemplated how she might persuade him to leave with her, to make an escape and flee with their baby to some unknown planet where they could be safe. She knew he would call her naive and maybe she still was, though she had still learned much in the ways of the world and people since discovering his true self.

All these thoughts she was still pondering when she followed Phasma around a corner and almost walked directly into a set of pristine, white doors.

"This is the infirmary and medical bay," Phasma explained, and entered a code which caused them to slide open.

Everything in here was white, such a stark different from the metal that surrounded her at every turn elsewhere on board. It was quiet too, almost eerily. Since the time she had been here she'd gotten used to the sound of air vents as substitution for birds and other living things, but in here all was silent and still, as if holding it's breath.

Phasma led her down the main hallway to a room all the way at the end, which they entered and shut the door, leaving them in darkness except for the light from a window into an adjacent room which Serela walked up to, almost tripping again on her pants in the dark.

Kylo was lying on a table in the middle of a blue tiled room, a breathing mask attached to his face and tubes implanted in various orifices that attached themselves to machines nearby. The steady rise and fall of his chest told Serela he was alive, but he looked so frail and vulnerable from this position, a sight she had never seen before.

Serela felt so confused by her reaction to seeing him like this. The man was a murderer, on a massive scale, he had even confessed to killing his own father and lying to her about it. His presence in her life had caused the destruction of everything she had ever known and held dear, but yet when she saw him here, lifeless and still, and looking close to death her heart stirred with concern and affection for him. She loved him still, she knew that, and it was against her better judgement yet still it was out of her control. He was the father of her child, her first kiss, her first everything...

"We must leave now," Phasma was suddenly beside her and Serela became conscious of the tears on her cheek, trying to wipe them away without Phasma seeing but knowing she was unsuccessful.

"What's happening to him?" her small voice asked shakily.

"This is part of his reconditioning. Retraining his brain to recognise his call to the Dark side and reinforcing his commitment. He submitted to it voluntarily after saying his goodbye to you the day you came."

Serela gulped, remembering that day too well and the way he had flown off the handle as she cowered in the corner, her hand placed protectively over her stomach in fear.

When they got back to the room, Serela threw herself on the bed in anguish, knowing already that what she had seen today would haunt her for a very long time. Yet even in the midst of her inner turmoil, Serela remembered to say something to Phasma her mother had trained her from birth to remember in situations where someone has done something nice for you. The phrase, however, had become so foreign to Phasma that she was completely caught off guard when she heard it uttered from the bed, Serela's mouth muffled by a pillow with her head facing the wall.

"Thank you Phasma."

 _GUYS. Thank you for hanging in there with me. I'm slowing down from my writing high where I was pumping out 1-3 chapters a day and now I'm in a normal pace of 1 a day usually or every other day. I just got offered a new job and my mother is coming this weekend so I'm anxious about giving notice tomorrow and making it through the next two weeks at my crap job. I usually write on my lunch break and when I have time in the morning before it gets hectic and busy. I will try very very hard to keep at the 1 chapter every day to every other day, but this weekend be prepared for probably a 4 day hiatus. If I somehow get ahead of myself I'll try to ration them out one a day._


	23. XXIII The Transformation

Sleep. He had been asleep for so long he wasn't even sure he remembered when he had first laid down. His mind, usually a jumble of conflicting emotion and voices calling out to him interchangeably from the Darkness and the Light, was strangely silent, devoid of anything at all.

When he tried to look inside his own heart, lying there with eyes still closed in his new state of semi-consciousness, he could see nothing, for inside it was completely Dark.

The reconditioning had worked. For the first time in years and years he could feel himself brimming with whole-hearted devotion to the Dark side; no nagging thoughts of Light vs. the Dark. There was only the Dark now, and it filled him with purpose.

His breathing was measured, the steady rise and fall of his chest seemed to pump new vigour into him and his lungs. The blood in his veins seemed to have darkened too in way, as if every vein were filled with the power of the Dark down to the last nerve ending. Slowly, he cracked open one eyes, looking at the room around him.

Kylo had no memory of being brought here, but he looked at his surroundings and found blue-tiled walls with overhead lighting so bright it burned his eyes after weeks asleep. He squinted against the glare, allowing his eyes to adjust to the new sensation.

A two-way glass window on his left side and a set of double doors on his right were the only variables in this blue room, his body and the table he rested upon the only occupants.

He heard a beeping sound behind him and strained his stiff neck to look, seeing that there was one more item in the room; a large metal box covered in screens and buttons with various tubes connecting it to his body, pumping him full of whatever formula must be responsible for his new found clarity.

Anxious to get up and test his legs again, Kylo laid still as a board, listening as his whole body hummed with the adrenaline of his freedom from the Light, the absence of internal conflict that had threatened every day to tear him apart. His memories were intact now, both the good and the bad, but he viewed them with indifference as he struggled to sit up and remove the tubes from his body by himself, eager to resume his work for Snoke.

Suddenly the doors to his right opened, admitting a female orderly. She approached him with a clipboard under her arm, her blonde hair pinned up in a tight bun and her lab coat so starched and bleached the color hurt his already sensitive eyes to look at.

"Lord Ren," she addressed him, using her index finger to push the black rims of her glasses back up the bridge of her nose as she said it.

"Speak," he ordered her, and he heard his voice for the first time, still the same, but also somehow darker, more menacing. It was as if even his vocal cords had been affected by the process he had just undergone.

"My Lord, your reconditioning was enormously successful according to your test results. General Hux instructed us to begin weaning you off the sedation a few hours ago."

Kylo felt his throat tighten at the mention of his nemesis, his chief competition for Snoke's praise and admiration. He began to recall how Hux had spent the past months questioning him at every turn, gloating at every failure and doing his best to usurp Kylo's power, undermining his position in front of Snoke. As if that were even possible.

 _I am all powerful_ , he thought, and, and Hux, like all the others on this ship would kneel and bow before him, standing in his rightful place at the right hand of Supreme Leader Snoke, his son and apprentice on Snoke's left.

 _We will be unstoppable._

"How long have I been in reconditioning?" he asked snappily.

"About 3 weeks, sir."

"And what has transpired in my absence? What important information have I missed on board the ship?"

Nervously, she replied to him, "I...I don't know sir, I merely work here in the medical bay, people in my position are not privy to the plans of the officers."

"Of course you're not!" he snapped, already losing patience with her and her uselessness. Where was Hux's worthless self, shouldn't he be here to explain things if he'd given them the order to waken him?

He had not noticed he was balling his hands into tight fists until the orderly did, "Sir, are you alright? Are you experiencing any adverse side effects."

"None," he hissed, and swung his legs over the side of the table, noticing the ridiculous medical bay robe he was wearing instead of his own black ones. "Where...are...my...clothes?" each word sounded more and more dangerous.

Fear clouded her eyes and she looked from side to side, which amused him, as if there were anything she could do in this room to protect herself from him. "I could go find them, my lord, and General Hux as well!"

He held out his hand and she lifted from the floor, feet dangling precariously over the tiles as her head tilted back with the tightness of his Force-choke. Rasping for breath, her body began to shake involuntarily with the effects of oxygen deprivation, and at just the moment before she lost consciousness, he dropped her, watching as she landed in a heap on the cold floor.

"See that you do."

Hours after the woman had scrambled back into his reconditioning room, bearing his freshly laundered black robes and already sporting bruises on her neck, Kylo strode out of the medical bay heading in the direction of the control centre, searching for General Hux.

He found him in the throne room, standing before the hologram of Snoke and looking very self-satisfied when he turned to see Kylo approaching.

"Supreme Leader, here is our creation now, I give you the new and improved Kylo Ren."

"Shut your mouth and save your introductions, Hux, our leader already _knows_ who I am."

Hux looked surprised, usually in Snoke's presence they kept their venomous jibes more subtle, but this _new_ Kylo Ren was much less concerned with following anyone's protocol but his own.

"Master, I have returned, fully sold out to the Dark side and with no trace of temptation left towards the Light. Tell me what I must do now. Is my task to search out Luke Skywalker?"

Snoke smiled, "No, my young apprentice. Skywalker will have already been found by the girl and he is a priority that must wait. There is another girl though, who needs your attention."

Kylo's thoughts flashed to images of her. They flipped through his mind like a photo album as he recounted each expression, her smile the first time he kissed her, the look in her eyes the night she had danced at the festival, the way her mouth parted, her hair spread out on the bed as he drove himself into her and listened to her moans... and finally, the last face he'd seen her make, the day he left her alone in her new room after destroying most of it, her beautiful eyes wide with terror and her body poised in the corner as if readying itself for flight.

Hux was saying something now, Kylo dimly realised it, and shut the photo album in his mind, listening to hear what new rubbish he was spouting.

"Supreme Leader if you would only let me have time alone with the girl, I _know_ that _I_ can make her see reason," the implication of Hux's words was clear as day, and Kylo felt an unnaturally boisterous reaction roil in his stomach at the thought of Hux being alone with her in the interrogation room again.

"NO ONE TOUCHES HER BUT ME," he snarled at the top of his voice, "SHE. IS. MINE."

Hux looked taken aback and Snoke looked jubilant on his throne, gazing down at his creation with pride. Clearly, the reconditioning had been every bit as effective as they had hoped and more.

"Yes my apprentice, she belongs to you. _But what must you do to keep her?_ "

When he answered, his voice sounded like the low grumble of thunder before lightning strikes, "I will bring her to the Dark side with me."

"And what if she resists your best efforts? What if she refuses?"

"I will kill her."


	24. XXIV The Reunion

A gradual camaraderie began to form between Serela and Phasma after the day she'd toured the ship and seen Kylo in his comatose state in the medical bay. Whether it was because a genuine affection for Serela was growing in Phasma or because both women were so completely bored staring at 4 walls all day was hard to tell. Either way, Serela welcomed the change.

Phasma began to answer many of her questions now, glad of the ability to talk again instead of remaining silent most of the day. Her tone was never animated or friendly, but Serela noted that she wasn't sure if it was possible to sound either of those when wearing a helmet.

One day, after Serela had eaten breakfast and they were waiting for the physician to come by and take her vitals, Serela plucked up the courage to ask Phasma something she had been wondering for months.

"Phasma?"

Silence, these days she knew that meant to go ahead and ask.

"What do you look like? Under your helmet I mean?"

"Much like any normal human being. Two eyes and ears, a nose and a mouth."

"Do you ever let anyone see you without your mask?"

"No."

"Why is that?"

Taking a deep breath, which Serela was afraid meant she had grown impatient with her questions again, Phasma began to tell Serela of her childhood and adolescence spent living in the shadow of a sister much too beautiful to compete with, but also much too wonderful to hate.

When the First Order had come to her planet in search of youth to recruit as trainee stormtroopers, Phasma had seized her chance to be free and was the first one there the morning they were able to register.

This had finally allowed her to leave behind her family, including her militaristic father, who had openly hoped that his 2nd child would be a boy, only to be saddled with another daughter, whom he had little time or patience for with the rare exception being times that he wanted someone to take hunting with him.

Although Phasma had been young when she was recruited, 15 or so she remembered, her sister had been 6 years older. The year before she left Phasma had watched her secure a fine society marriage into one of the galaxy's ancient houses, the Vandrons, and birth her first child, a daughter, named Tierney.

Serela listened to Phasma recount in grisly detail how her mother had allowed her to be present at the birth, watching the gore with a mix of horror and fascination.

When her niece was born and placed in her arms for the first time, Phasma told Serela she knew that she would never be a mother herself, but that she would do everything in her power, for the rest of her life, to ensure the protection of this tiny, innocent creature. Tierney had been 6 months old when Phasma left; she had never seen her again.

Sensing there was an even sadder ending to this story, Serela opted to wait silently and see if Phasma would offer the rest of it voluntarily. After a few quiet minutes she did.

"Her husband was a Senator of the New Republic," Phasma finally explained, "They had been living on Hosnian Prime, one of the 5 planets in the Hosnian system we destroyed the day Lord Ren first saw you on Takodana."

Serela's face went ashen, "They destroyed the planet with your sister and family on it?"

"My sister and her husband were enemies of the First Order. The government they were a part of gave support to our enemies, the Resistance, and for their treachery they paid with their lives. Such a sacrifice was necessary for the good of our cause," her tone did not sound convincing.

"But Phasma... your niece, the other siblings she likely had..."

"I never knew any of them!" she snapped, and Serela knew that she had struck a nerve, "If I had seen them on the street I would never have been able to tell them apart from anyone else."

"How many-" Serela started to ask before Phasma interrupted her.

"The last report I saw listed the number of their children at 5, but that was 3 years ago. My sister always wanted a big family, it's likely there were 1-2 more at the time of the attack."

"Oh Phasma, how terrible for you. I'm so so sorry," Serela's voice cracked in emotion for her, and the pain she must have endured as she watched the destruction of her flesh and blood from afar.

"Don't pity me!" she growled, the edge back in her voice, "I made my choice long ago. I don't deserve pity from you or anyone else."

Serela closed her mouth to prevent saying anything else that might further alienate Phasma from her, and looked down at her burgeoning belly, rubbing the bump with her palm as she contemplated what she could possibly say. The baby kicked gently, as if giving her a nudge to say something else that would comfort Phasma.

Just as Serela was opening her mouth to speak again, the double doors to her chambers SWOOSHED open, admitting the same physician who came to attend to her every single day.

"Captain Phasma, General Hux commands you to bring the prisoner to the medical bay for a sonogram of the child to examine it's progress."

Deterred from offering some comfort, Serela scooted off the bed, a process which was becoming gradually more difficult as her midsection continued to grow. Not yet waddling, Serela's pace was more of an amble these days, her stomach beginning to protrude noticeably now, but not so much in the oversized black clothes they continued to supply her. Someone mercifully must have said something about the pants length though; after one of her exercise walks around the ship she had tripped on the pants and almost fallen flat on her face (and the baby.)

After that she began to receive hemmed pants, which fit her length-wise if not necessarily girth-wise yet. Of course, she reminded herself, it was only a matter of time before she begin to fill out the waist of them too.

The three of them, Serela, Phasma, and the physician, began the walk down the hall, the physician in the lead and Phasma taking her usual position bringing up the rear. If she was still thinking about what they had spoken of moment before being interrupted, she gave no notice of it.

Serela was getting more familiar with the layout of the ship. She almost felt confident that if they trusted her enough to report to the medical bay by herself she could find the way there on her own.

When they had almost reached the white double doors, Serela turned the corner just on the physicians heels and stopped dead in her tracks. It had been so long now since she had seen Kylo that her heart had almost stopped looking for him at every turn; but there he was, 30 ft ahead and standing next to Hux, the red-haired man who made her blood turn to ice. Their heads were bent down deep in a conversation that did not look friendly.

She inhaled sharply when she saw him, and the sound made his helmet snap up to see her, drawing the attention of both men as she stood there dumbstruck. The sound of Phasma's boots on the hard floor stopped suddenly behind Serela as she rounded the corner behind her prisoner and watched the situation unfurl.

Ignoring Hux, Kylo stepped towards her, the physician stepping aside quickly to avoid any unnecessary communication with him. Although Serela had not yet met the new Kylo Ren, word had spread fast amongst the Finalizer crew about his changes, and most were in no rush to encounter him.

"Hello," he said, stopping in front of her and looking over her shoulder at Phasma as if to say, _Back off._ This was not the Kylo Ren who wished for privacy anymore, this was the one who demanded it.

"Hi," she whispered shyly, unsure how she should respond to him. She had spent so many weeks contemplating everything she thought and wanted to say to him, but now here he was: tall, dark, and intimidating. All she could think to do was stare back at him and wait for him to speak.

"How are you feeling?" There was something different about his voice. The words were kind, but the tone which delivered them carried a sinister undercurrent, sounding inherently sinister and she felt sure that they still would, even without the helmet. She withstood the strong urge to shudder.

"Better," she admitted, "The nausea isn't so terrible anymore. It's been weeks since I've felt very sick."

He did not answer her, merely turning his head toward the physician as if giving her permission to speak and confirm this.

Responding rashly and tripping over her words, the physician scrambled to answer in the way that would make Lord Ren most happy, while at the same time not knowing what way that would be.

"It's true sir. She had entered her 2nd trimester and is approaching her halfway mark in the pregnancy. Everyday she and the babe appear to be in the peak of health."

"Good," Kylo responded, and the physician visibly relaxed. Serela noticed over Kylo's shoulder that Hux was still in the foreground, staring at her with no attempt to conceal his revulsion.

Kylo stepped closer to her and cupped her cheek with his gloved hand, an action reminiscent of much happier times which sent familiar shivers down her whole body. Only now she couldn't be sure if the reaction was from affection or fear.

At his touch, another sensation gripped her, which was wholly unfamiliar and she had been entirely unprepared for: the baby _moved_.

Startled, both her hands flew to her stomach and she looked down in surprise, drawing concern from Kylo.

"What is it?" he asked, and again she heard that stern, dangerous tone to his voice that unsettled her deeply. Still, she couldn't shake the smile that came from the sensation.

"He moved!" she told him excitedly, too preoccupied with the joy of the moment to worry about Kylo's mood.

"Doesn't he...move all the time?" Kylo questioned, slightly less menacing sounding and now more curious.

"He kicks sometimes but never like this. I swear he just did a complete flip!"

It was impossible to read his reaction with the mask and he gave no other indication as to how he was feeling, so she looked up at him through the mask and smiled, her hands absently rubbing her belly as she did.

"You will report all medical tests and results to me from here on out," he was addressing the physician again, not her she noted painfully.

Kylo bent his head down until his mask was within an inch of her face.

"I will come and see you tomorrow," he promised, his tone less commanding than the one he had used with the physician, "I have some other things I must attend to today."

Her heart fluttered in spite of what her head told her finally, that Kylo Ren was bad news for her and the baby.

He brushed her shoulder as he passed by her, nodding to Phasma before turning the corner and heading the direction from which they had just arrived. He left Hux glaring at his back, and once he was gone, at her.

Hux approached her like a lion approaches it's prey; knowing full well it had the poor beast cornered but wanting to make a game of prolonging its victims terror as long as possible.

"Don't presume that because he's coming to see you he will be anything like you remember," he threatened murderously, "His reconditioning was _very successful_." The last two words he whispered in her ear, giving her the first feeling of nausea she'd had in weeks as it brought back to mind the day he had tortured her hours after giving the order to burn her house to the ground with her mother inside.

Wishing he would just leave as Kylo had, Serela stood rigid as his hand reached up and brushed her long hair over her shoulder, stroking it and her back.

"This is entirely too long for a woman so small," he murmured, "You should really think about cutting it." His breath grazed over her neck and she felt the baby move again, this time not with excitement, but fear. It felt as though the baby wanted her to move it as far away from Hux's presence as she herself wanted to be in that moment.

Finally, mercifully, he was gone, leaving her a shaking mess standing there and looking back at Phasma for some comfort.

"Come along," was all she said.

Later, after they were back in her chambers and Serela had a print of the sonogram in her hand, she sat cross-legged on her bed and stared at it, remembering her conversation with the physician.

 _"It's definitely a boy," the woman had told her, and Serela had rolled her eyes._

 _"I knew that weeks after getting pregnant," she told her._

 _"Well, here's the confirmation right here on the screen, he's normal sized for a baby in every way but that, he'll have to.. um... grow into that."_

 _"Lord Ren will be proud to hear it," Phasma offered from behind them, and both woman turned from the screen, shocked to have heard Phasma make a joke._

 _All three had then burst into laughter._

Serela smiled at the memory, it had felt good to laugh again, and to see a side of Phasma that could deviate away from serious. A memory surfaced, a funny moment with one of the children she had taught, and she turned to tell Phasma and see if she could make her laugh again.

The doors opened, and standing there making her stomach immediately tighten in anxiety was Hux again, though she could not think of any reason for him to be here which would make her rest easier.

"Captain Phasma," he addressed her, but his eyes were fixed on Serela, "How fared our prisoner in the medical bay this morning?"

"Her progress and the baby's are very good, sir."

"Excellent," his voice sounded like that of a snake hissing, and he closed the doors, heading for Serela where she was sitting on the bed.

"I thought I might come by and see for myself how you were doing," he said, "Our last conversation was too brief for my taste."

Serela bit her tongue from saying the opposite had been true for her, but resisted the urge. Better to sit here and try to take whatever he was going to dish out than possibly instigate something worse.

"So, do you have a picture of your bastard?"

Her face grimaced at the term he chose and she saw Phasma's head glance up from the floor to stare at his back, and she remembered that Phasma had not been present in the room the last time they had been confined together.

"Yes."

"Where?"

She did not want to give it to him, but she knew if she refused he would likely hit her until she gave in, so she slid the photo out from underneath the covers where she had tried to hide it, her hand shaking as his met hers in midair.

His free hand grabbed her wrist and held it in place while his other took the photo, turning it over in his hands again and again trying to figure out what was what in the black and white photo. Serela would have explained which part was the head and the spine if he'd asked, but since he didn't she remained silent until he threw it back down on the bed in frustration.

Hoping that was the end of it, she made the mistake of trying to wriggle her arm free of his grasp, which seemed to anger him more, and he yanked her forward, using his other hand to grasp her other wrist and pull her towards him. Too startled to fight back she felt her body lurching forward and her arms being tugged painfully as he tried to force her to stand before him. "That's better," he crooned, his mouth only inches away from her face and his breath smelling of chemicals and death.

Serela looked over his shoulder as he leaned in closer and stared at a fixed point in the wall, trying her best to ignore the sickening feeling of his nose on her neck, inhaling her scent and tracing her collarbones with his fingers. One hand trailed down to stroke her bare belly and again she felt the urge to vomit in conjunction with her baby's panicked, get-me-out-of-here motions.

"Don't. touch. me." she said more bravely than she felt.

He didn't fall for it, "Or what?" he asked, lifting her shirt to stare at her bare belly, the bulge poking into his stomach as he moved his body closer to her.

Light help her, she was going to vomit on him again!

Her hands came up to push him away and he grabbed them roughly, squeezing her wrists until she cried out and slumped down, "Please...stop!"

"Sir!" Phasma was up and coming to intervene now, _Yes Phasma, help me, please._

Serela slumped to the floor when she felt his fingers release their hold and felt her face touch the cold floor, her cheek hot and flushed from shame and fear. There was a scuffling sound as if they were struggling against one another in the corner of the room and she raised her head to look.

Hux had Phasma by the throat, holding her against the wall, her face purple and gasping as he stared wildly into her eyes, strangling her. Phasma's view of the situation was beginning to fade as the blackness started to cave in, when she felt the release of pressure from her throat and collapsed in a heap.

In the blink of an eye, Hux was thrown against the wall with a loud clang, falling on the floor and leaving a large dent in the wall in his wake.

Standing there beside the bed where he left her Serela had her arm outstretched, her entire body radiating a powerful vibe of pure Light. Her skin almost seemed to glow with it and when Hux looked at her to realise she had been the one to cause his injury he made to stand and come after her, only to be thrown back against the wall again.

"GET...OUT..." Serela's voice was loud and deep, it was a voice that did not sound like her own, but someone else speaking through her, a powerful entity which she could not place but it felt familiar, as though it had always been there below the surface of her body, just waiting for such a moment when it could be unleashed.

Her face was still beautiful, but terrifying, and when Hux rose again he glanced at her, then Phasma, and thinking better of trying his hand at a round 3, he exited the room swiftly, not sparing a glance back at either of them.

A minute passed where the only sound was Phasma's labored breathing and the dull whir of the air vents. Serela still stood where she had been, straight and tall with her arm held out, still trembling and ready in case he decided to come back. When she felt confident he was not returning, Serela rushed to Phasma's side, sitting on her knees, asking her what she could do to help.

While she was lying on the floor, gasping for breath, Phasma herself reached up and pressed the button that removed her helmet with a hiss. Assuming it was okay to help her, Serela reached over and took the helmet from her hands for her, and then she finally looked upon the face of her captor and pseudo friend.

Her skin was pale, almost alabaster white, most likely from so much time away from the sunlight and wearing a mask. Her hair was blonde and cropped just beneath her ears, the strands damp with sweat from wearing the mask all day every day.

"You didn't leave? You could have tried to escape, but you didn't." Phasma tried to sit up but her breathing was so short she became dizzy and laid back down on the floor.

Serela looked at her sympathetically, "You would have gotten in trouble Phasma if I tried to escape, and I couldn't have them hurt you. Besides, I'm probably safer here with you than anywhere else in the galaxy right now."

Phasma snorted, "Hard to believe you would still say that after what he just did."

Serela didn't answer, she was too busy studying Phasma's face, a product of weeks of wondering what she looked like, and now being one of the few to see for herself.

"Oh Phasma," she said, "You're beautiful."

 ** _Update: sorry this chapter posted last night before I was completely done with it because I was so anxious to give you something, so pretty much the last few lines sounded jumbled and rushed but I've fixed it now, sorry for the 'whoops' moment._**

 _sorry if that sounded cheesy I just LOVE Gwendoline Christie as Brienne so I figured I would just describe her as looking the same. Even though they try to ugly her up on GoT I think she's actually a really breathtaking woman and I wanted to be able to show the friendship dynamic that has been forming here gradually over the months Serela has been on board, because it's going to be crucial in the next few chapters and the events that take place._


	25. XXV The Change

The morning after her sonogram Serela woke early. She rolled over and looked at the cot Phasma had chosen to sleep on last night as opposed to going back to her own room. Even after seeing how Serela had repelled Hux, Phasma didn't want to risk him coming back when she wasn't there and another stormtrooper would just let him in unsupervised.

Dim underlighting in the room had helped to comfort Serela, who panicked the first time the lights had gone off in here, throwing her into a darkness so deep she could not see her own hand in front of her face. What she wouldn't give for a window in this room...

Phasma stirred, and Serela rolled over to face the wall, not wanting her friend to know she was awake yet. Kylo had said he would come see her today, and she wanted more time to be able to ponder her thoughts on the matter before she had to begin another day as a prisoner aboard this ship.

She didn't have long however, before she heard the static of a call box next to the door and the sound of Phasma climbing off her cot to answer.

A robotic, male voice that did not belong to Kylo addressed Phasma through the radio, "Lord Ren wishes for you to bring the prisoner to him in his chambers within one hour. Have her rise and dress now so she will be ready to meet with him."

Serela's heart leaped in her chest and the baby woke up; it felt like he was bouncing in every corner of her womb, as if he too sensed and hoped that today his father would be more of the Kylo she had known during his conception, and not whatever monster he'd been made into.

"Serela," Phasma was addressing her softly, her mask still on the floor where it had remained since last night. There didn't seem to be a need to hide anymore in here. Serela popped her head up and smiled at her so she would know she had heard, then rolled herself over and began to clamber out of bed. A shower seemed to be in order, and so she ambled towards the bathroom with Phasma still seated on the cot, watching her slow pace with sleepy amusement.

The hot water soothed her bare skin and helped to wake her from her sleep, the steam enveloping her like a warm fog even after she'd shut off the water and stepped out in search of her drab, black garments. Catching her reflection in the mirror over the sink as she was pulling on her shirt, Serela turned from one side to the other, looking at the bump protruding out, the subtle curve of her stomach a testament to the life that grew inside of her. A life _they_ had created. _Together_. She could only hope that somehow she would be able to get through to him when they spoke today, but the strange tone of his voice in the hall yesterday did not seem to suggest it likely.

Her hand rubbed the bump, making swirls with her fingers tracing delicate circles and patterns around her belly button, _We're going to see Daddy soon,_ she tried to communicate to the fetus, but received no response other than a lazy kick. He seemed to be falling back to sleep.

Phasma led the way when they left, and Serela followed close behind, her hands crossed over her stomach protectively and her baggy sleeves clutched in her hands to ward off the chill of these hallways.

It was not nearly as far to Kylo's chambers as she had thought. The medical bay seemed to be on the other side of the ship, and it had taken them almost 20 minutes to walk there, 25 with Serela's progressively slower pregnancy pace, yet Kylo's rooms were only a 10 minute walk, but in the opposite direction.

Once they arrived they stood outside the door for a moment, and Serela experienced something she had never felt before. She could _feel_ him in there. It was like she could hear his heartbeat through the inches of hardened steel that made up the doors; she could see his spirit through the layers of metal surrounding him. His presence seemed to call out to her, making itself known so strongly that she would have felt it was him even if she had not known to whom the room belonged.

"Are you afraid?" asked Phasma's robotic voice, by now sensing her insecurity. They had known each other too long for Serela to fool her.

"Yes," she breathed, "But my mother used to tell me that when you must do something that scares you, it cannot be allowed to control you. She said when those moments came to let the fear sink in, let it paralyze you if it must, but to only let it do this for 5 seconds. You must count them, she told me, and after 5, you must push forward with whatever it is you must do. _Feel the fear, and do it anyway."_

Serela looked to her friend for comfort but could not decipher any from the mask she wore, yet she knew Phasma was there, and that offered some reassurance in and of itself. Turning her face to the door, she took a deep breath and closed her eyes. _1..._ the fear was very real, but not overpowering. She felt anxious about seeing Kylo again. Would he be wearing his mask? Would he explain more to her? _2..._ The baby was squirming inside her anxiously too. Could he sense something that his mother could not? It wasn't good for babies if their mother's felt continuously anxious while carrying them, right? _3..._ Fear had her heart gripped in its cold hands, squeezing a little tighter with each passing moment, but there was something else too, the powerful presence of the Light which resided in her heart like a burning flame seemed to be growing brighter and larger in spite of her fear. _4..._ This was it. It was almost time for her to knock and go in. Almost time for her to see him and speak with him for the first time since he'd told her about his lies and deception. Was she ready for it? Was he? The Light burned brighter, filling her heart, brimming with energy and buoying her spirit until she felt she was ready for the next number.

 _5..._ The doors SWOOSHED open before she could finish and she lifted her eyelids, coming face to face with Kylo Ren standing in the doorway, his masked face pointed right at her.

"Welcome to my chambers," he greeted her, and gestured with his arm that she was welcome to enter at her leisure.

Serela looked back at Phasma with a nervous smile, and then took a few tentative steps past Kylo until she was in middle of the room, looking around at his sparse furnishings. When Phasma made to walk inside as well Kylo stepped into her path, blocking her.

"Captain Phasma your presence will not be needed at this meeting," he informed her brusquely, and Serela turned to see her friend pause in the doorway, as if unsure whether or not she trusted that she would be safe anywhere that was out of her sight.

"It's fine, Phasma," Serela assured her, "Kylo would never hurt me or the baby."

Kylo did not even regard Phasma for a moment after rejecting her from the room, his whole body was turned towards Serela, watching her every action. Phasma stayed in the doorway, unmoved.

"Phasma, don't worry about what happened yesterday. I will be _fine_ ," Serela gave her a smile this time to make sure Phasma would be more heartened, and it seemed to work, for she took two steps backward.

Immediately after she cleared the door frame Kylo's hand twitched and the doors shut, closing her off from Phasma abruptly and leaving her completely alone with Kylo Ren for the first time in months. For the first time since he had told her if she did not join the Dark side she would be separated from her son at birth and _murdered._ Her stomach was doing flips now, and she didn't think these ones had anything to do with the baby.

"Hi," she offered weakly, unsure of who should start the conversation.

He didn't answer, he just looked at her from across the room, pausing momentarily before striding toward her; an ominous black presence approaching languidly, as if he were the predator and she the prey. Hadn't her mother tried to tell her something to that effect? His wide steps closed the distance between them in no time, and he looked down at her from his tall height, cocking his head to the side and studying her face. There had not been much time for him to look at her yesterday, and now he took his time. He appreciated how extraordinarily beautiful she still was, perhaps even more so now that she was carrying his child. She seemed to have filled out some and he could see that beneath her hands lay a stomach beginning to bulge with the signs of his growing baby inside her. Long, brown locks adorned her shoulders and back like a shawl, but her clothing was something that he had noticed yesterday which surprised him greatly.

"What are these things you've been wearing? Is this what you _like_?" he asked, looking skeptically at her haphazard, ill-fitting black ensemble.

Surprised that this was how he began their conversation, she nonetheless responded, "I wasn't really given a choice on what to where, my dress was burned and I couldn't very well walk around the ship naked, could I?"

His mind went fuzzy and warm at the image and memory of seeing her naked, recalling the many times he had done so, but then his vision went red with the thought of anyone else seeing her naked, _anyone_. That was a privilege for him and him alone. He had claimed her the night his seed took root inside her womb, and now whatever she said, she _belonged_ to him.

"I'll see to it that you're supplied with some more appropriate garments as befits your position on this ship," he stated simply.

"And what position would that be exactly?"

"The position of my companion, the mother of my child and the future mother of the most powerful Sith Lord in the galaxy. You have been treated as a prisoner for far too long and it is time you were regarded more highly."

"I'm your companion? Kylo, I've barely seen you since the day I was brought to this ship, now you're speaking as if I've been here everyday in close communication with you. I have not changed my mind about turning to the Dark side, so I would rather keep what ugly clothes I have as they don't seem to come with the condition that I convert or die."

His shoulders stiffened, but instead of losing his temper she heard the mechanical voice reply, "Suit yourself. I will still have different clothing delivered to your room. I would prefer that you wear it, but I will not force you."

Serela glanced around inspecting the few items in the room, a double bed with silvery sheets and a black duvet folded neatly down and tucked perfectly under the mattress, a metal nightstand with a lamp, a door she assumed led to the lavatory and a chest of drawers built into the metal wall which housed his collection of black robes. Everything here was so completely opposite the life she had led on Takodana, and the life they had led together during his visits. It pained her to realise that this was where he had come back to when he had left her for those prolonged periods. This was where he had plotted and planned and slept when he was away from her bed and her arms.

"See something you like?" His question startled her and she stopped her perusal of the room to respond.

"Please take off that mask," she asked him, "You know I don't like it."

As they were in private and he thought seeing his face again might aid him in convincing her to turn towards the Dark, he reached back to press the release button, waiting for the hiss that told him the helmet was loose enough to be removed.

She held her breath until she saw his face. Still the same but also much changed. The light scar over his right eye had faded to a dull line, but his eyes held the same probing look they always had, as if trying to learn everything about her just by looking.

He gazed down at her expectantly, an almost superior look on his face as he asked her, "Better?"

Serela pursed her lips before answering, "Yes."

"Good," his hands came up to cup her face, stroking her cheekbones with his thumbs. Her mind immediately swam with memories he was projecting onto her, but they were happy and so she accepted it. There was that day in the woods he had kissed her the first time, the feel of his soft lips on hers so warm and inviting, the feeling of expectation the night of the festival and the way his hand had felt in hers as they'd left for the cottage together.

It was so tempting to give in and enjoy this familiar moment, so reminiscent of others. If only she could abandon herself to the memories and forget all that had transpired since she had told him of her pregnancy. If her mother could have survived that day on Takodana...

She pulled her face away from his hands. None of those things were possible, and she had to deal with the situation before her in the here and now. Her son was in grave danger from his father and everyone around them. That was her reality right now. That was the trial she must face head on.

Kylo huffed in frustration when she pulled away but he was not deterred, even in the midst of the impenetrable darkness inside himself now, he could still remember how happy she had made him, and remember well the pleasure he'd given her with murmurings of love underneath the covers . Those were not things one forgot easily, and he had seen in her mind that she kept those memories close to her, but there was a new space occupied inside of her that he had not seen before. A space for their son which seemed to almost overshadow all others.

Serela wanted him to touch her, hold her, kiss her, make love to her again. But she knew if that happened it would set a dangerous precedent, and only serve to confuse her feelings more. She knew that she wanted him, somehow in spite of everything, she wanted to be with him and for them to be a family, but not here... there was no such thing as a family here.

He reached out his arm and touched his finger to her temple. Knowing he was reading her mind, but being conscious that she could control some of what he saw, she chose to show him images of Takodana, trying to convey her longing for her home; the wild trees and brush, the long green grass that tickled your feet and moss that covered every rock, with waterfalls and mountains and lakes as far as the eye could see in some places. She showed him an image she kept close to her heart, of the two of them at her cottage, smoke rising from the chimney and him outside, chasing their toddler son through the yard as she watched them from the window. She felt it when the meaning clicked for him, and she knew he understood what she was trying to tell him, _I want to go home._

"Takodona is closed to you," Kylo sneered at her, "No one on the entire planet will touch you or help you knowing that you've been held by the First Order."

He sidled up closer to her and she could feel herself shaking at his proximity, this was not the man she had known and loved for that brief time before everything had fallen apart, this was something else: a perverse creature corrupted by the First Order into a shadow of that man.

"You know I can take whatever I want," he whispered in her ear, his hand snaking around her waist, and her traitorous body went weak at the first intimate contact she'd had from him in months. "You remember how I used to do this to you?" he asked softer, bending lower to lightly lick her neck and nibble on her ear lobe.

Serela moaned before she could even think, and she felt Kylo's smile against her neck, "You still like that don't you baby?"

Her eyes had glazed over in that familiar way they always had when he was about to take her to bed and her head began to gradually forget everything that had happened as her body responded to Kylo's siren call on her. His hands found their way into her hair and wound themselves in the strands, pulling her close to him roughly before he descended on her mouth with urgency.

This kiss was unlike any of their others. There was no gentleness first, no letting her get accustomed to the feel of his tongue in her mouth and his lips on hers. It was raw, hot and forceful. A battle between their mouths which she had no chance to win.

He bit her lip and she tried to pull away, but he held her to him so tight it hurt everywhere as she struggled against him.

When Kylo broke away to resume his attention to her neck she gasped in gulps of air and tried to push him away, "No Kylo, stop it."

"But you don't want me to stop do you my love? You know I know all the ways to please you. I still remember every. little. detail."

The urge to give in was so strong, and she knew he was probably inside her head, trying to force her mind to succumb while he worked to do the same to her body. Images of their former liaisons surfaced, leaving her body yearning for his in a desire so strong she wasn't sure she could resist him. _Please_ , she thought, _Please stop this._ She didn't think there was much more she could take.

"I want to make you moan again Serela. I want to make you writhe in pleasure for hours as you scream my name again and again, just like it was before." His hands moved to her lower back, trailing lower and squeezing her flesh, recalling all the things that had left her helpless to his touch before. "It can be just like it was before, Serela," he promised.

The reminder of how it had been, but no longer was seemed to bring her back to reality, and she was once again conscious of the bump between them, reminding her that she _could not_ give in, even if she wanted to. She had to do what was the best for her son.

When he leaned in to kiss her again, she put her hands against his lips and instead of being thwarted he kissed a line from her cheek back to her ear, making her knees weaken as she tried again to deny him again.

"Stop Kylo, this isn't right."

"Of course it is, you for me is the only thing that's ever been right in my life. I know you want me, you want to feel good like I used to. _Give in Serela._ "

He was holding her face in his hands now and looking at her so sincerely she could almost believe this was the same man, just for the briefest of seconds, who had played with her students and helped her and her mother cook food in the kitchen and bounced children on his knee at the festival, the man she had loved for a short time, the man who fathered her child.

He leaned in and kissed her forehead like he used to, "You want us to be together. To be a family. I can see it in your mind, it's practically shouting at me. You feel the call to give in, and stay here with me, forever, and our son. Don't be afraid... I feel it too."

"No Kylo, no you don't. You have no idea what I feel."

His face hardened and suddenly his hands on her face were gripping her hard, his eyes widening in concentration as she felt a terrible pain in her head. They had read each other's minds before, but always playfully and never without consent. This was different, it was rough and invasive, as she felt him combing through her brain for memories and thoughts and feelings, looking for something he could use to persuade her. She fought him as he did, which made it more painful; it was like a razor blade scraping the lobes of her brain and leaving small cuts behind in its wake that ached and bled.

She was screaming by the time he finally relented and let go, pushing her away from himself. The last memory she had seen him find was the day she had told him about the baby, how happy he had been at the prospect of being a father. Raw, genuine happiness that could not have been faked in a thousand years. The echo of her words then followed, " _I think we should name him Han, for your father."_

There was a shift in his eyes when he pushed her away, and he seemed to look around warily, as if not sure where he was or how he had gotten there. Serela sensed in him a small bubble, filled with the Light and resting in the middle of a black abyss. It looked so clear and pure, and her heart fluttered as she saw a glimpse of hope for him, that there was still something in there, golden and pure, trying to work its way out.

Almost as soon as she sensed the bubble, seeing it clearly in her mind, she watched as the abyss crushed in around it, and it popped.

Back came the hard face and she knew that, just for a second, she had found him, the real him, with equal parts Light and Dark inside him, but with the return of his malicious scowl she knew he was now lost to her again.

"DO YOU WANT ME TO KILL YOU?" he screamed at her, and she startled backward, beginning to fall until she felt him use his power to catch her, draw her back upright and pull her towards him, the toes of her slippers dragging on the floor.

There she was, in front of him again, and his handed rested ominously against her throat, caressing the skin he had been licking minutes before.

" _Give in to me_ ," Kylo said forcefully, his voice taking on an almost potent tone as he rubbed her neck with his thumb, and she knew he was trying to use the Force on her without her knowing. "Let us be a family. You, me, our son. Together we could rule the galaxy, raise him and ensure his future together."

She scoffed at him, no longer so naive about Snoke's purposes for the thanks to the information Phasma gave her, "Our son has no future if he is raised by the Dark side, he will only be used as a puppet until he had outlived his usefulness. Just like you and I would be."

Serela felt his hand tighten around her neck, "Be careful, Serela," he warned her in a mockingly pleasant tone, "Remember the fact that you have your very life at this moment is thanks to the good graces of the Dark side."

Her stomach gave a lurch every time she looked at him and saw that sinister expression on his face. His reconditioning had been more than effective, if the intended effect was to horrify and revolt her.

"Actually, it's been made abundantly clear that the only reason I am still alive right now is because I'm needed for the health of our baby. If he were already born when I was captured I would have been left for dead on Takodana or thrown in the trash compactor here months ago."

He started to say something, his face looking dangerous, and she continued, emboldened with the knowledge that while pregnant, she was safe from harm from him or anyone, no matter how high their anger rose.

"I will _never_ succumb to the Dark side Kylo, not on your life or mine or our child's. The Light will be the winning side in the end."

Serela watched as he pinched the bridge of his nose, waiting several seconds before responding.

"You've grown up listening to too many fairytales," he reproached her, "The Light loses, the Darkness wins. Sorry."

"That's not true Kylo and you know it. The Light prevailed 30 years ago on the battle of Endor and the Death Star when your uncle and your parents helped to defeat the emperor."

"Han Solo and Leia Organa were traitors to the Empire, using their positions as war heroes to form the New Republic which we have already effectively crushed! It's only a matter of time before we discover the new location of the Resistance base and wipe them all out. As for Luke Skywalker, he will be found too, and brought here to answer for his crimes."

"What crimes Kylo? For escaping your rampage when you murdered every single one of his progeny?"

He released her throat and raised his hand up as if he was about to strike her, but instead of cowering away like she normally would have, she stood tall and resolute, staring at him with the air of someone who has no doubts that they are right.

"You're not Kylo Ren," she whispered when he dropped his hand, "The man I loved would have never raised his hand to me in anger or anything else. Whatever else they have done to you, they have taken you away from me and our son."

This time there was no anger on his part, he just stared at her listlessly, trying to figure out how to respond. "You're right," he finally admitted, "I'm not the man you loved. That man was a remnant of a boy long gone. The man before you now is Kylo Ren as he should have always been. Dark and fearless, more powerful than almost anyone."

She grabbed his arm and he almost pulled it away from her but she held fast, "But Kylo, that isn't what I want. Not for you or me or our son. We could leave here together, start over somewhere that no one knows who we are. We _could_ be a family, if you would only renounce the Dark side and come with me."

The smile he gave her was one of purest evil, and she felt herself shaking almost as badly as when she was in the same room with Hux. There was no shadow of mercy or pity in his face, only cold, unfeeling determination to take what he wanted at whatever cost.

"I underestimated you," he observed drily, and he relinquished his hold on her, pushing himself away to put distance between them, "I thought you loved me and our child. I thought you would make the choice that would let our son have his mother, something I thought you of all people would consider vital to his development."

She regarded him warily, thinking she knew what he was trying to imply, but waiting for him to say it.

"After all," he continued, "You only ever had your mother. You spent your whole childhood longing for two parents, a mother and a father to both love you and care for you. I don't understand how you could not want the same for our son."

This wasn't fair, he was taking everything he knew about her, all the information he had gathered over months and months and using it against her, trying to manipulate her towards his side.

Serela stepped closer to him, and he stepped back again. She had rejected his physical advances, and now he wanted her to remember what it felt like to yearn for his touch like oxygen, depriving her of even a close proximity to him in order to starve her out metaphorically.

"I want..." she began, hesitating as she tried to phrase it the right way, "I want what all mothers want. For my child to have the things I didn't. I want him to grow up safe, and happy, and free, as I did. I want him to have the choice of what he wants to do with his life when he comes of age, not spending every moment from his birth until death being trained in the Dark side until he doesn't even realise there is another side to be found. Yes, I do want him to have a mother and father who love him, but more than anything I want him to be safe. I grew up with only one parent, and I'd like to think I still turned out well. I can only trust the Light that in the same circumstances my son will too."

"Even if you are dead and it is I who am doing the raising?"

She swallowed, "Yes, I trust that the Light side will protect me from dying and give me and our son a future. But if it doesn't I still trust that he will be alright in the end, whatever the case may be."

He gave a half-sigh, looking down at the floor and rubbing his forehead as if staving off a headache. "So we stand here at an impasse. I will never leave the Dark side for you and you will never leave the Light for me. It seems we are right back where we started from when you were brought on board this ship months ago."

"It seems so." She wanted so badly to reach out and touch him, to hold him to her and let him feel the baby kicking beneath her skin, she wanted him to feel the baby's thoughts as she did sometimes, when he was sleepy and happy and the way his small body quivered and flipped when his father touched her face affectionately. But this was not a time or place for that. Their conversation was ending, and with neither getting the resolution they were hoping for.

"Then we have nothing more to say at the moment Serela."

"No...no, we do not."

 _Sooooo you probably noticed I used a few of Kylo's lines from his interrogation scene with Rey just because they were SO HOT and I thought it fit perfectly with the scene. Lemme know what you think about their characterization and dialogue. I'm always self conscious that I'm repeating words too often or the dialogue gets confusing, so any feedback on that would be very much appreciated. I'm still blown away by the number of views on here. Somehow, because the world is a crazy place, I am over 10,000 views in less than two weeks! WUT? You people must REALLY like Kylo Ren as much as I do. (also, sorry if you were hoping for more smut, I can't promise if or when that will/won't come again, but if it does, you will see it coming ;)_

 _I love writing this though and I'm hopeful that more of you will give me your honest opinions on how the story is progressing. I probably sound like a broken record, I just never really share my writing in person with people because I'm so insecure about it and secretly I think everything I write is probably crap and I tear it apart in my mind after posting it, so your comments legitimately mean the world to me because it's the only feedback I get._


	26. XXVI The Torture

"How goes your efforts with the girl?" Snoke's hologram inquired from atop his lofty throne, his perceptive eyes watching Kylo's expression carefully.

"She is persistent in her resolve to abstain from the Darkness Supreme Leader, but I know that in time she will come to see the power of the Dark and abandon her predilection for the Light in order to be with the child, if nothing else."

Hux stood beside him and rolled his eyes with a snort, "Not so easy on the eyes anymore with that scar eh Ren?"

Kylo's hand was just raising to lock Hux in a Force-choke when Snoke put an end to it, "SILENCE!" Dropping his hand, Kylo looked up and started again, "Supreme Leader she is only halfway through her condition and that leaves at least another 4 months for me to sway her. I have every confidence that she will relent and join us. It is only a matter of time."

A derisive cough from Hux drew his attention but he kept his eyes fixed on Snoke, who was reading his mind like a book.

"I see you are not lying my apprentice, whether or not it is true what you say about her renouncing the Light, you are wholly convinced that she will, which pleases me."

"Yes, Supreme Leader. Her ties to the child are strong, she will never willingly leave him to be raised without a mother, no matter what she says."

"Perhaps, but in your renewed fervour for our cause perhaps you are forgetting the power of a mother's love knows no bounds. Your own mother, for instance, sent your father to draw you back to the Light at the cost of his own life. In spite of this however, her power in the Light is, I fear, too strong and goes too far back to be changed. It is an irreparable damage her mother did to her, raising her from infancy as a Child of the Light. She will not come easily to our side, if ever truly at all."

Kylo paused, then opened his mouth to speak again, but Hux interrupted him, "And if she refuses, even to the point of death Ren, what then? You've pledged your restored commitment to the Dark side, but I wonder if when the time comes will you really be able to follow it through."

Irked at being addressed by Hux this way, Kylo resisted the urge to Force-choke him again and concentrated on convincing Snoke of his undying allegiance, "Supreme Leader I have already killed Han Solo, my own father for our cause, when the time comes if she will not convert it will be no more difficult to wipe her out than to kill a flea. My place is here with the Dark no matter the cost."

Snoke's gruesome face broke into a smile, "Good, my young apprentice. I see your zeal has not diminished with your disappointing results in seducing her this morning. I leave her in your hands."

Kylo bowed, knowing he was dismissed, "Yes, Master." He turned on his heel and spared one last glower in Hux's direction before he took his leave.

Hux waited until the last echoes of his footsteps had faded away and he head the sound of the doors closing behind him before he spoke freely to Snoke.

"Supreme Leader, with your permission I believe I could make the girl see reason without any undue trauma to the fetus. I had begun to break her down the day she arrived but was forbidden by you to have extended contact. I would like an opportunity to try again."

"And you waited for Kylo Ren to leave because you know he would be displeased with your plans?"

Hux straightened, pulling back his shoulders to deliver his defense, "Kylo Ren is completely ours thanks to the method of our reconditioning. Even if he has moments of brief lapse, which will happen from time to time, our results already show that his treatment resolves the matter quickly. Yet even still, the area of the girl is a sticky subject with him, and I fear he is too _attached_ to allow us to do what we must."

"You believe he lies when he says he will kill her himself?"

"I believe that depending on where he is in the cycle of his treatment there will be moments or series of moments where he will be more susceptible to resort back to old ways, though never so completely gone as before."

"What exactly is it that you plan to do to the girl General?"

As Hux explained Snoke sat on the throne, his elbow propped on one of the stone arms, listening intently. When he had finished outlining the plans, Snoke regarded him thoughtfully for a moment, looking off at a point in the wall while he considered it, before finally clearing his throat and giving him the order.

"See to it that it is done."

* * *

Hux marched through the halls with a self-satisfied look on his face, careful to avoid the control room where he knew Kylo Ren most likely had gone. He didn't want to be anywhere near Ren in case he should read his mind and see what he had been plotting. Always very careful to steer his thoughts away from his plans while in Kylo's presence, Hux had trained himself to be very selective as to what he dwelled on while in the same room as his nemesis.

After a stop in his chambers to retrieve some items, he checked the hall both ways twice before setting off in the direction of her room. When he passed two storm troopers on a patrol he stopped them and gave orders to follow him. It had become clear that Phasma was just as protective over this girl somehow as Kylo Ren, and he would not walk into that room again without sufficient backup and leverage.

The ominous sound of three sets of approaching boots somehow seemed to reach Serela in her meditative trance on her bed. She sensed them coming, and opened her eyes in alarm, jumping up and attempting to tuck herself into the corner of her room furthest from the door. "Phasma!" she cried, "They're coming!"

Almost as soon as Phasma rose from her normal seat, the doors opened and the two storm troopers immediately grabbed Phasma, disarming her and casting her weapon aside where it was far out of reach from both women. Her arms held fast in their grip, Phasma tried to whirl around and demand of them, " _What is the meaning of this?"_

As Hux strode in purposefully, he stepped up to her, lifting his head so he knew she was looking into his eyes.

"Your task on board this ship for the past few months has been to guard this prisoner, yes?"

Even with the mask Serela could tell Phasma was seething when she spoke, "Yes, sir."

"But you attempted to restrain me the other day when I was having a perfectly normal conversation with this woman here, the whore of Kylo Ren."

Phasma did not answer, but Serela felt her anger in waves as she cowered in the corner. Under normal circumstances she would have tried to stand and fight but she had been uncharacteristically drained since returning from her conversation with Kylo, and she barely felt she had the strength to stand, let alone fight him off.

"Yes," Hux murmured, turning his attention to Serela crouched in her corner, "Kylo's Ren's bastard, Kylo Ren's _whore_. That's all anyone on this ship seems to talk about these days." He was walking towards her now. Oh, what she wouldn't give to have Kylo come in here at this moment.

He stepped uncomfortably close to her, though not yet reaching out to touch her. His hands were clasped behind his back and he looked down at her ravenously, as though intending to devour her whole. She clutched her stomach with both hands, trying to control her trembling as she felt the baby wake and begin to swim anxious circles inside of her.

"Kylo still thinks he can break you _Serela of Takodana_. He still thinks there is hope that you'll do the right thing and join the Dark side for the sake of your son. I'm not so easily convinced though, and neither is Supreme Leader Snoke."

A tiny flame of defiant energy flickered inside her and she snapped back, "I don't give a damn what either of you thinks."

All of a sudden Hux had pushed her against the wall, pressing her against it with his weight enough to keep her in place but not enough to hurt the baby. Still, the shock of it left her gasping with tears in her eyes from the pain of having her head bang against the metal paneling.

"You know what else I think, _Serela of Takodana_ , I think you've been handled with kid gloves for too long on board this ship. I think you've been allowed to sit in this room and dwell on all your sweet memories of _Takodana_ and forgotten what your true situation is. That you are not a guest here, but a prisoner, and one meant to serve a specific purpose. You may later be allowed to serve others, but that is conditional upon your conversion to the Dark." He looked her body up and down lasciviously with his last sentence, and she felt the familiar urge to vomit all over him, but this time she stifled it. She would not give him the satisfaction any more of knowing how he affected her, not if she could help it.

His body pulled away and he walked across the room, giving her a moment to breathe before he grabbed the chair Phasma had been sitting in and gestured for Serela to take a seat. When she hesitated he stomped over to her and grabbed her by the arm, yanking forward until she had to move her feet to prevent falling. Her hands still covered her stomach protectively as she sat on the cold, metal chair.

Hux withdrew a small device from his pockets and a razor blade, placing them on the small table by the door with a clang. Pushing a button, a hologram emitted from the device which showed Serala a rotating planet, it's orb-like structure spinning in a fluorescent light as she stared.

"Do you know where this is?"

Serela shook her head, and Hux's smug smile returned.

"This, you feral, backwater bed warmer, is Takodana. Your precious home planet."

She looked closer, ignoring his insult and he obliged her by enlarging it, closing in on the point where she could see the lake by Maz Kanata's former castle, where she knew her village would be nestled in the wooded area between the water and the mountains. Hux zoomed into that precise location, and she reminded herself that he already knew where it was.

As the image enlarged it gradually became a screen, and she watched as it showed her the village. All the people she knew and loved, her entire life up until 2 months ago, all milling about commencing with their everyday business. The children darted through the streets chasing each other shrieking with mirth, and people joked in the windows of their homes with others passing by. It all felt so wonderful and _real,_ almost as if she could touch them right now, and when she reached out her hand to try it fell straight through, distorting the images with her own flesh and blood. She hadn't realised she was crying until she heard Hux's loathsome voice speaking to her.

"Now Serela, how far would you go to protect the ones you love? I understand your mother is gone, but there are still others here that you care for, no? Others that you might make sacrifices in order to protect."

Serela sniffled and wiped her nose with the back of her hand. There were people she loved there, yes, but what was he getting at with this? What exactly was he going to ask her to do?

"I understand that the tradition for native Takodana women is to wear their hair long, is it not? Many have never cut theirs even from birth."

Now she remembered his admonition to her about cutting her hair yesterday on the way to her sonogram. So this was it? His newest method of torture was to slowly strip away all pieces of herself until only a shell remained? He was right, she had not cut her hair for many many years. It had been a lifeline for her, a type of security blanket if you will. It concealed any physical flaws she felt self conscious about like the shape of her face and the way her ears sometimes stuck out from her head. She had drawn comfort from it so many times, draping it around her shoulders for warmth and to cover the baby, sometimes tickling her stomach with it when he was awake. It held memories of her mother brushing it, cradling her head as she did so at a young age, and eventually braiding it when it became long enough, watching year after year as it grew more and more. Her hair was a part of her, and he knew it. It was a part of her that bonded her to Takodana and her mother and in some ways to the Light itself. She understood that by cutting her hair he would be trying to sever her ties with her planet and her memories. Only then could she be free to join the Dark side. Or so he thought.

"I know what you are thinking," she whispered, "But it won't work. My hair may be gone but my commitment to the Light will remain."

"We shall see."

The flash of the razor blade glinted in the overhead lighting as he drew it to her. Serela flinched when he brought it close to her neck, resting the edge of the blade against her throat just above the major artery. He leaned in close and his putrid breath reeked in her face, "Maybe this will be the same one I use when I dispatch you after we pull that bastard out of you." He looked thoughtful for a moment, "I wonder how good your bastard's chances for surviving would be if I just cut him out now," his index finger traced a line across the bulge of her stomach, then his lips caught her ear lobe and nipped at it lightly, "Or maybe I'll keep you around a bit longer and have some fun first."

Serela was trembling from head to toe, and she closed her eyes, trying to find that place inside her that she had called upon that day in the woods with the storm troopers and the afternoon Hux had tried to strangle Phasma.

As if reading her mind, Hux cautioned her, "Don't even think about using the Force against me. The second you do these two soldiers will shoot your friend Phasma here full of so many holes they won't even be able to piece enough of her back together for a burial."

That was the moment she broke. Out of options, and hoping in vain that Kylo would think to come in time to save her, she bent her head low, resigned to her fate.

"Do it," she told him.

He brought the blade down quickly each time, hacking off one huge chunk of her hair after another. It was more work than he thought it would be; her locks were thick and healthy, the wavy tresses cascading onto the floor in short piles as he worked efficiently. He took no care in chopping evenly, and with each haphazard slice her tears spilled hot and fast, her cries of internal agony unable to be contained for long as he cut away something so precious to her. Each strand was cut, not a single one being spared.

When he was finished, he surveyed his handiwork with a staggering amount of bravado. "There now," he smiled patronizingly, "You're finished. Would you like to go see yourself in the mirror?"

Through her tears she shook her head 'no'. She could see the evidence of his butchery for herself in the form of her 20 years worth of growing laid around her like a sheep that had just been shorn.

"Well, at least I know now what lengths you would go to protect your people and your prison guard, if not necessarily your own son," he spat at her condescendingly.

She cried out in anguish, collapsing on the floor in a pile of her own hair, the result of years worth of braiding and unbraiding, brushing, washing, growing. It all lay cast as her feet and she felt so naked without it she began to shake uncontrollably, accompanied by deep, shuddering gasps as she sobbed into the fragments of herself strewn across the cold floor like garbage.

Serela still lay there weeping when they released Phasma's arms and she was allowed to rush over, leaving her weapon abandoned on the floor as she knelt and tried to pull Serela up. In no time at all, Hux had disappeared with a smirk, snapping his fingers at the storm troopers to indicate that they were to follow.

"Stand guard outside the doors," he ordered, and they obeyed, as the doors slid closed with a brutal finality to it.

Phasma held Serela as she sobbed into her shoulder, trying to subdue the despair clouding her mind as she wept the hardest she had since the day her mother burned alive in their cottage while she watched from outside.

"Shh, shh," Phasma tried to comfort her, but Serela was beyond comforting. She felt violated in every way, and she played back everything he had said from the verbal to the nonverbal, shivering at the memory of his finger tracing a line across her stomach and his horrific words, _Maybe I'll keep you around a bit longer and have some fun first._

She wanted Kylo here. She wanted him to come in and wreak havoc, to make Hux leave her alone to carry her child and find whatever small pleasure she could in this half-life she led here now as a consequence to her poor choices. The desire for revenge, something she had never sought before in her life, for there had never been a need, became a very real and potent emotion coursing through her. The Light however, would not have it, and when she felt the itching of Darkness trying to creep inside of her system, she saw the Light attack it voraciously, trying to expel every inch of it's inky shadow.

When she had calmed herself, she looked up at Phasma's mask watching her, the uncomfortable armour of her arms digging into Serela's back but it felt so good to have arms around her while she cried that she didn't care.

"Th-thank you, my friend," she said, eyes red and swollen from crying.

Awkwardly, Phasma patted her shoulder and waited for Serela to pick herself up before she rose as well. They stood there for a moment in a sea of hair until Serela finally said, "Well, I guess I should go and see what damage has been done," her normal cheerful demeanor returned.

Phasma stepped aside to let Serela pass and open the lavatory door, stepping in front of the mirror to survey her mangled hair. It could have been worse, many different tufts stuck out at odd angles and almost all of it was completely uneven. She couldn't remember a time in her life when she had ever looked or felt more ridiculous.

She was just about to reenter the room and make a joke to Phasma when she heard the doors to her chambers reopen and Phasma's startled cry, "Serela!"

Panicked, thinking Hux had returned, Serela heard her and threw open the lavatory just in time to see Phasma's chrome-armoured body standing in front of the now open doors. There was a flash of light and Phasma's low groan told her something had happened, but then a pool of blood began to spill from her stomach as Serela watched and began to scream.

* * *

 _Author's Note: I know what you're thinking, WTF a chapter two days in a row? What is this? Honestly I've just been pushing myself to keep going with this to the point that I'm spending most of my lunch breaks writing and even some of the workday when I can get away with it LOL. There's really a kind of high that comes from getting so much writing done and not to be a stats whore, but every time I log in and see some insane number of views and read the encouraging reviews it makes me want to just sit my butt down and keep going! You guys are really awesome, I'm still just so surprised considering my view count on Wattpad isn't even at 200. Amazing, simply amazing. Please please PLEASE let me know what you thought of this chapter. I originally was going to make it longer but the events that are about to transpire would probably have made it twice as long to write (therefore twice as long to post). I promise to do my best to upload the next one in the next 1-3 days, although the last time I said that I took 4 days and it was the longest chapter I've written to date. Anyways, hope everyone is having a great week! I for one can't wait to start my new job next Tuesday so I'm just trying to get through this week at work and using whatever time I can to finish this. Have a great rest of the week!_


	27. XXVII The Escape

"No. No! NOOO!" Serela screamed, rushing forward and grabbing Phasma's hands as they clutched at her side, trying to support her friend's body as she slumped down to the floor. Serela glanced at the doors expecting to see Hux or the stormtroopers, but instead she saw their two bodies dead in front of the doorway, and a man dressed in plain clothes standing there with a blaster in his hands.

Too devastated to understand or question him being here, she turned back to his victim, watching the blood seeping onto the floor as Phasma struggled to draw breath, both women's hands red with the angry liquid.

The man in the doorway cleared his throat, "Are you Serela of Takodana?" he asked.

She ignored him, holding her friend in her arms and fumbling for the button on her helmet that would allow her to remove it. There had to be a way to fix this, she had to live! Even as she sat there on the cold floor, hoping for a miracle, Serela knew already that Phasma was beyond help. When she looked inside of her friend, she could see a small candle, flickering in a wind and beginning to dim.

"Phasma, Phasma, please, not you... I can't lose you too."

"I-I did w-what I had to d-do... to protect you... and the b-baby..."

Serela didn't know what to say. She had lost her mother first, then Kylo, now this? It was too much to bear. The man behind her came closer, his tense face betraying his anxiety, "Look! I'm here on a rescue mission to find you! I'm with the Resistance. We need to get out of here now if we're going to get you to safety!"

Phasma's throat gurgled as she tried to speak to her, "T-take **him** , g-get him as far away from here as p-p-possible. Save h-him and y-y-yourself."

That was when she understood that Phasma was talking about the baby, and when she finally found the button again to remove the helmet, she pulled it off and placed her fingers on Phasma's temple, reading her thoughts and last memories before dying. She saw the face of her sister and her niece the day Phasma had left on the ship, both her sister and mother waving a tearful goodbye on the launchpad as Phasma ascended the ramp into the command shuttle for the First Order. She felt the stages of Phasma's feelings towards her and the baby, how they had morphed from irritation and mild concern to this point which had led to her needless death. There was Dark inside Phasma yes, but there in the memories she saw Light too, and she braced herself against the grief threatening to rip from her throat in another scream. Tears blinded Serela as she bent over and bestowed a kiss on the forehead of her captor and rescuer, watching as a few of the droplets fell on the breastplate of her armour when she pulled away.

The man waiting behind her was standing at the open doorway warily, looking both ways waiting for someone to come upon them and make all this for nothing. His eyes were wide with fear, but Serela could not bring herself to leave.

"G-G-Go! Go w-with h-him, " Phasma ordered, her voice even shakier now, "B-Before it's t-too l-l-late."

Her head slumped to the side, the dark red puddle beneath her spreading out further and seeping into Serela's slippers. Her eyes were open, but glazing over as the steady pull of impending death enveloped her.

Letting out a sob in spite of herself, Serela hugged her friends body to herself one last time, "Thank you, my dearest friend, I will never forget you," she promised, and slowly let Phasma's body lay flat against the floor. Devastated, but recounting her dying words, Serela stood to her feet and wiped away her tears with the back of her arm, stepping away from her friend's dead body and looking towards the man in the doorway as if she were completely lost.

"C'mon!" he hissed, beckoning her wildly with his arm while trying to remain quiet.

She stepped towards him and felt the squelching of her feet as she looked down over her protruding belly and saw the blood-drenched slippers on them amongst the hair red with Phasma's blood.

"Let's GO," he mouthed to her and grabbed at her arm to pull her with him, which she wrenched back.

"Don't touch me," she warned him, and she used her heels to peel the slippers off her feet, beginning to take wobbly, uncertain steps in the direction of the door.

Suddenly another man appeared dressed similarly, "Thank God! We've been looking everywhere!"

"Yeah, well I've been trying to get her to leave her room since I found her but she won't move!"

"Ms," the other man approached her, and she pulled back her arms in case he thought of reaching for her arm too, "We don't have much time to get you out of here. There is a narrow window left for us to rescue you, you MUST leave with us now."

Her swollen eyes felt irrepressibly tired, and she was afraid if she did not step forward now she would falter and collapse on the floor next to her friend. The second man looked from her to Phasma to her surroundings, taking in the piles of hair soaked with blood and he shook his head in confusion and disbelief, then held out his hand to her. It wasn't a demand, it was a request.

"Please," he asked her, and she felt inside him immediately a flicker of the Light burning like her own. Not nearly as strong as hers, but enough to make her take the step toward him and take his proffered hand with her own bloody one.

Barefoot, she followed them down the hallway, leaving red footprints in their wake as she struggled to keep up. "Is it this way?" the first man whispered to the second, indicating a hallway to their right, and she released his hand in order to take direction.

"Are you looking for a ship?"

They both gaped at her, this was the first thing she had actually spoken to them.

"Yes," the second one finally sputtered, "Which way?"

"Here, I'll show you."

Now she led the way, and Serela felt thankful for all the times she had gone for walks with Phasma down these halls, acquainting herself with the ship and its topography. Oh Phasma, why did she have to think of her now? The tears were rising again in her eyes and she squinted them hoping to keep the urge at bay until she could take the time she needed to grieve properly. Certainly, this way neither the time _nor_ the place.

Both men had their blasters at the ready and she tiptoed as best she could, but knew that sooner or later bloody footsteps were going to arouse suspicion and led a host of storm troopers right to them. It did seem strange though that they had yet to encounter anyone at all.

"Where is everyone?" she muttered, more to herself than to them, but the first one answered for her as they made another left.

"Poe Dameron and his crew are creating a distraction on the bottom level to keep them busy long enough for us to find you. We were able to get enough information about your whereabouts from one of the storm troopers we found when we first got here, now if we can just get back to our ship without being killed we'll be in good shape."

Serela nodded and then looked down at her hands, stained crimson with Phasma's blood and she reminded herself to wait for safety to grieve, doing so here and now would only put her and the baby in danger. They were just rounding another corner and almost to the landing bay when she caught sight of a troupe of storm troopers marching towards them. Too late to avoid being spotted, she ducked behind the wall as the first blaster fire aimed for her head.

"Stop!" she heard a static-like voice order, "Lord Ren will have all our heads if she is harmed in _any_ way."

This threat created just the diversion her two rescuers needed as they pulled her from the corner and jumped to take her place, firing at will into the group of soldiers, surprising them so much that all fell within seconds.

She wanted to scream with the brutality of it. All of it. Phasma's death, these men, the storm troopers, she just wanted to crouch down here and close her eyes, forgetting everything except her wonderful cottage in the woods of Takodana, her mother baking in the kitchen and Serela scanning the trees for Kylo's impending arrival. That was her happy place, where she went to when she needed solace from the turmoil of her life. Even if only for a few moments, she could relive those happier times and find a bit of peace.

"Let's go!" the first man was tugging on her arm and she followed, hugging the wall as they did while they scurried along to the waiting ships.

The room was huge, and definitely not empty. Hordes of storm troopers hastened every which way, loading themselves into TIE fighters like the one Kylo had used to visit her on Takodana. Serela and the two men were still behind the last corner, trying to figure out the best way to board one undetected.

That was when she sensed he was close.

"We don't have much time," she warned them, "Kylo Ren will be here any second."

Startled, but not asking why or how she knew this, they both seemed to lock eyes on a black X-wing fighter 50 ft away that seemed to be the perfect fit.

"X-wings can go into lightspeed, right?" the first one asked.

"The one from the Resistance can, dunno about the First Order."

"Well, I guess there's only one way to find out."

They looked back at her, this poor pregnant girl with the haircut from hell, half-covered in blood and the second man reached his hand back to her again, "Together?" he asked.

"Together," she nodded, and the three of them sprinted off in the direction of the ship.

Serela's bare feet slapped the floor painfully and she ran for all she could, flanked on both sides by the men with blasters. It took all of 10 seconds before they were under fire but she could feel Kylo's presence creeping closer in the field of her mind, and she knew they only had minutes to get out. Without knowing how or why she did it, Serela let go of the man's hand and reached out her arms, allowing the same strange energy to flow through her as the day she stopped Hux from strangling Phasma. Instantly storm troopers were thrown back against the nearest hard surface, most knocked unconscious and others merely disoriented, but it was the headway they needed.

Boarding hastily, both men had to help Serela get into the ship. Such a large exercise of power had cost her whatever remaining energy she had and she felt herself getting faint. The second man helped her to her seat and strapped her in while the first made a dash for the cockpit, firing up the engine as Serela began to pass out.

Her last conscious thought was Kylo's presence, so close, but far enough away that she knew they were going to make it, and his voice, pleading with her, _Don't go Serela, don't leave me here without you._

After that, blissful nothingness.

 _I wasn't going to post this tonight because I thought I should wait it out another day or two, but I told myself if I hit 27 reviews (since this is chapter 27) I would go ahead and post, so here you go!_

 _If you couldn't tell, Serela has a little bit of Stockholm Syndrome, hence why she was afraid to leave even with Phasma gone. She's pregnant and alone and her mother is gone so even though she's still clinging in some ways to her naivete, she is growing in leaps and bounds, but it's still a terrifying thing to trust two strangers you've never met who tell you to come with them._

 _Okay, so the good/bad news here is that I am now completely caught up on most of what I have already written, with small snippets of future chapters sitting in the notes section of my phone and a pretty good idea of what is going to come next. I'm so grateful to those of you who are sticking with me and this story, I promise you I have never written so much in my life on one story before I started this one. It's so insane to me. Thank you again for all the lovely comments/reviews, they are what encourage me to keep going!_


	28. XXVIII The Refuge

Serela was in and out of consciousness, hearing small snippets here and there during her bouts with wakefulness.

"How much longer?"

"At lightspeed we should make it there in another hour."

"How is she?"

"Still sleeping."

"Any sign of the First Order following us?"

"No signs on the radar. We've got Dameron and most of the fleet behind us guarding our tail. We should make it there fine."

Periodically, she felt warm hands feel her forehead and check her pulse, but she was too exhausted to even lift her head on her own. Eventually she felt both men unbuckle her from her upright position in one of the seats and carry her, one by the shoulders, the other by the knees. They laid her in a small bed where she was gently strapped in again in case they had to make a turbulent escape when and if the First Order did show themselves.

Serela did not know or care about any of this however. In her sleeping state, she was alone on an island inside of herself, dozing lazily against a tree while the sun shone high above her, it's bright light hurting her eyes and making her sleep longer every time she tried to open them. Sometimes the baby would wake up and begin to move but even that she began to sleep through, and in commiseration perhaps she felt him nestle back down inside of her in soft slumber too.

There was a vague memory of being lifted again, this time onto a stretcher of sorts, and each corner being carried by a pair of strong hands. She smelled fresh air and felt the warmth of real sunlight, trying to open her eyes but she couldn't. The exhaustion and grief was still too all-encompassing.

She heard many voices during this transition, mostly male, but there was an older female voice too, someone who sounded powerful as the other voices asked her for direction while they carried Serela.

"General, where do you want us to take her?"

"She should be brought to the infirmary to be checked and treated before being released into my care. See to it that she and the baby are healthy and then report back to me. When she is awake you may take her to see our other guests before bringing her to me."

Serela groaned slightly, trying to let them know that she heard them, that she wasn't half dead, even though it felt like it.

"That sounds like a good sign," the female voice said, "Take her to the infirmary now."

It wasn't long after that she slipped back into unconsciousness again, retreating to her private island in the middle of an ocean, her last memory of cracking an eye to see the sun, only to watch it eclipsed by the ceiling of another metal building as she was carried inside to await her new fate.

* * *

Drip drip drip. The steady sound of water was what finally woke her from her comatose state with a start. She looked up at the ceiling, breathing heavy and trying to remember what she had dreamt about. This was not the shiny metal prison she had just escaped from, these walls were metal yes, but of a hardier sort. The walls and ceiling were solid, worn metal that looked as if it had stood the test of time for years and years.

Her eyes still felt heavy, like she was on the verge of falling back to sleep again, but the desire to wake up was stronger this time, and she forced them to stay open.

She looked down to the foot of her bed and saw that the wall opposite from her was one long window, it's surface completely covered with various greenery the likes of which she had never seen before. Fronds and vines of every kind obscured her view of anything past the first line of foliage, but it warmed her heart to see green again for the first time in months.

The dripping sound that had woken her was from a bag of fluids suspended next to her head, pumping the various secretions into her arms, both of them plugged with multiple needles. Panicked, she fumbled clumsily with the bandages, trying to extricate them from her arms and get off of this bed. She wasn't sure what parts she had dreamed and what she had actually remembered in the hours, or was it days? since her rescue from the Finalizer. All she knew was that she did not want any of what they were forcing into her system while she was unconscious and unable to consent.

As she ripped one of the needles free from the back of her hand she cried out in pain as the blood began to run down all the way down her arm. Never in her life had she encountered needles beyond the necessities of sewing and she was already woozy from the sight of her first one. It lay cast upon her lap over the starched white blanket they had covered her with, small red droplets of blood calling to mind the pools of Phasma's she had stood in only minutes before her escape. Serela looked down with dread at the three remaining needles in her arms.

Thankfully, just as she was reaching to pluck out another one, a woman, middle-aged with a kind face emerged from a door that swung open to her left. "Good morning,"she smiled, then looked at her watch, "Or should I say good afternoon?"

Serela stared open-mouthed at her, sure that she looked stupid but still too disoriented by these new surroundings. This woman seemed to sense that, "No need to worry dear you've had quite a shock, being rescued from the First Order like that, and in your condition too. My name is Dr. Kalonia. I'm the chief resident physician here for the Resistance base."

Swallowing, Serela tried to find words but before she could Dr. Kalonia looked at the needle lying in Serela's lap and tutted her concern, "Now my dear, you mustn't remove these things by yourself, it's dangerous," she was approaching the bed and sat down on it next to Serela, picking up the discarded needle and wagging her finger. "This is no good my dear, you were very weak and in need of fluids and supplemental nutrition, which is why we put these into you. Believe it or not you've been asleep for almost a day since we brought you here. It's understandable though, given the trauma that you've been through, but you're safe now."

Shaking her head in disbelief at this doctor's reassurance, Serela finally found her voice, "Where am I?" Her hands absently clutched at the sheets and she twiddled her thumbs trying to resist the urge to continue pulling out all of these needles. Dr. Kalonia noticed this and gave a sigh before beginning to help her remove them while she explained, "The Finalizer was deep into the opposite side of the Inner Rim from us when we found your location. You're on D'Qar now, safe."

"Where is D'Qar?" she asked, scrunching her face in pain as another needle was withdrawn from her wrist. The doctor immediately applied pressure to it however, and gestured for Serela to hold the gauze in place while she removed the other two.

"It's located in the Outer Rim," she told her, "Far from Takodana, but not nearly as far as you were on board that ship."

"Does the First Order know where I am?" she asked panicked.

The woman hesitated before answering, her head cocked to the side in sympathy, "Most likely," she answered truthfully, "But that is not for you to worry about now. You need to take care of yourself and your baby, and leave the worrying to those of us in the Resistance."

Serela stared down at her hands. They had been washed while she was unconscious but she could still see Phasma's blood under her fingernails and she felt sick to her stomach. These people had gone to so much trouble and endured such peril only to retrieve her! Who would give such an order for such an unimportant person?

"Quin is one of the men who rescued you," the woman interrupted Serela's thoughts when she began to speak again," He's going to come in here in a few minutes and escort you to see the General. She should be able to explain everything."

Momentarily mollified, Serela rubbed her arms where the needles had been extricated and flexed her muscles, noting their soreness from so much time left sedentary. Dr. Kalonia reminded Serela of her mother, the way she spoke in soft, soothing tones and rubbed her arm gently as she explained things. Other than Kylo's attempted seduction and Hux's intended torture she'd barely been touched by anyone for months, especially not in comfort or affection.

Almost as soon as the doctor had finished telling Serela about the impending arrival of this Quin person, the door opened again and in stepped the second man who had found her distraught in her cell, weeping over the body of Phasma as she refused to go with the man who had killed her. The same one who had offered her his hand as they ran through the loading bay dodging stormtrooper blast rays, and who had settled her into a seat before tending to his own safety belts.

He entered with a smile of recognition and she finally got a chance to look at him. He was an older gentleman, not her mother's age but still in his late 30's, with dark hair that held some streaks of gray and a large stature reminiscent of her own father's. He seemed genuinely happy to see her and Dr. Kalonia rose from her seat on the bed when he entered, greeting him warmly.

"I was just explaining to the patient where we are located and giving her a brief description of her visit so far, since she was by and large unaware of it."

Quin chuckled, "Yes, you did seem to be out cold for a long time," he joked, "But I doubt you could sleep much on board that ship with the sound of engines humming all day everyday."

Serela tried to force a small smile, barely lifting the corners of her mouth at his good-natured humour. Perhaps when she had more answers to her questions and felt more confident that she and the baby were truly safe here, then she could smile and laugh again. But not now... definitely not now.

Unaware of what to say that would set her mind at ease, but knowing that he was taking her to someone who likely would, Quin stepped forward and offered Serela his hand again, and she was reminded of the tense moment before she had fled her chambers with the two strange men; when she had chosen to trust him. She felt so unsure of so many things, almost everything right now really, but when she looked into his face and then closing her eyes, into his heart, she saw the same Light inside him that had made her take the hand he offered her then, and this memory was what caused her to take it again now.

He pulled her gently from the bed, and she stood shakily on her two legs, grabbing Dr. Kalonia's arm for support.

"You might be a little rough on your feet at first," she warned her, "But the more you exercise the sooner you will regain your strength. Don't push yourself too hard though, remember the baby."

Serela nodded and took a lumbering step towards the door, almost pitching forward onto her face in her efforts to do so. She saw that she was wearing a strange gown and there was a noticeable draft along her backside, and when Dr. Kalonia was sure Serela was steady enough to stand with only Quin for support, she hastened to a closet by the window and retrieved a type of robe which she helped Serela into.

"There now," she quipped, "Should help keep you warm and safe from, er, prying eyes."

Thanking her, Serela took a few more wavering steps forward, her confidence in her ability growing with each one until she finally stood up straight again, still holding Quin's hand for balance, but not feeling as if she would collapse without it there.

Once they cleared through the doorway, Quin steered her to the right, his spare hand softly touching the small of her back to guide her wobbly progress. They made their slow, unsteady way down the halls one step at a time, her freshly cleaned feet squeaking on the tiles of the floor as the dingy overhead lighting illuminated the way through the windowless passages.

They had just cleared a particularly long hallway, leaving her winded when she stopped and turned to face him. "Are you taking me to the General?" she asked, "I need her, or someone to explain to me what is happening. I need answers to all of my questions if I am to stay here." She almost laughed at her own pretension, she spoke of staying here as if she even had a choice. Still though, she wasn't going to leave him thinking that she was as helpless and pitiful as she seemed. She might be a pregnant orphan with a target on her back courtesy of the First Order, but she was still a person with her own mind.

"We will," he promised, "All will be explained soon, but first, there is someone who wants to see you." His arm stretched out, pointing to a door on her right only a few steps away that she hadn't noticed yet. Taken aback, she braced herself for some foul creature to come running through the door, or Hux, having tracked her down or organising this whole ridiculous charade for further torture. Who was there that would want to see her besides this new female general she was going to meet later? Who else in the whole galaxy did she have now except for her child?

Cautious, she tread warily towards the door, holding her stomach and rubbing the bump softly as if to reassure the baby that they really were safe, while still being totally unconvinced herself.

She reached the doorway, pausing at the threshold and making one final glance back at him. He nodded at her in encouragement, "Go," he mouthed with a smile, and she held the narrow door frame for support as she took the final step inside. It was a sparsely decorated room, with a few settees and wing-back chairs, their fabric old and ratty from wear and age. It seemed to be a type of lounge for the Resistance employees, owing to the fact that there was a table with chairs and the remains of someone's crumbs on it's battered surface, along with scattered drink cups and food wrappers. Small windows let in sunlight and gave her another look at the wooded area outside this building. There on one of the settees sat a female figure facing away from the door. Her heartbeat quickened, and she approached tentatively, noting the dark hair piled on top of the head and the graceful curve of their neck. From back here it almost looked like...

The woman turned her head and rose frantically when she saw her, eyes never leaving Serela's face.

"Serela!" she cried, and almost jumped over the settee to get to her.

"M-M-Mother?" Her voice came out in a sob, thinking her mind must be playing tricks on her. The woman she saw in front of her had died months ago. Worst of all, she had died as a repercussion of Serela's choices and mistakes. This was impossible, another cruel irony to torment her for her catastrophic lapses in judgment.

She fell to her knees in shock and looked up at the presumed apparition, wanting to drink her in before she disappeared. Her hands fell limp beside her and she bent her head down to let the first wave of tears fall before looking back up. This was a moment to soak in, before the fantasy disappeared and she was left with the cold harshness of reality once again.

"Yes love, it's me. I'm here," Reha smiled down at at her daughter as she walked towards her, arms outstretched for an embrace. Tears were pouring down Serela's face at her approach; her ghost of a mother was 5 steps away, 4...3...2...1... And suddenly she was bending down to the floor and lifting her up, the arms holding her felt tight and wonderfully real. Serela buried her face in Reha's shoulder, still sure that this was somehow a trick.

"You-you can't be here, there was no time for you to get out of the house."

"The Light has a way of making things happen that otherwise never would my love. Remember that."

Another wave of tears came. Huge, gasping breaths ripped from her throat as she squeezed the body in front of her for all she was worth. They stood there, mother and daughter for a long time before Serela finally began to realise that Reha was real. This was a flesh and blood person hugging her tightly back, her _own_ flesh and blood, the very one she had come from herself 20 years ago. She sobbed harder at the knowledge that somehow, in some inexplicable way, the Light had saved her, in spite of all Serela's failures to recognise and avoid Kylo. In spite of the danger she had put herself and everyone from her village in, _her mother. had. been. spared._

When she finally pulled her face from her mother's shoulder and looked her in the eyes she saw Reha was crying too. Absently, a product of years of doing it, Reha began to play with her hair. "You cut it," she observed.

With that Serela began crying harder, "They made me," she sobbed, "Oh Mother you were so right and I was so wrong about everything. Everything!"

"Not everything child."

Reha glanced over Serela's shoulder to look back towards the door she had entered from and Serela's eyes followed. A man stood a few feet away in the corner, dressed in gray, tattered robes, hood obscuring most of his face.

"Who-" but Serela was cut off by the man as he stepped forward and pulled back his hood, revealing a kind, aged face with graying hair.

"Hello, Serela," he smiled at her, but she still didn't understand who he was.

Reading her mind, indeed her thoughts were practically shouting at him in her delirious state, he answered her first and foremost unspoken question: "I am Luke Skywalker."

* * *

 _Truth time: how many of you are like, "DOH! I saw that one coming! The mother was secretly alive the whole time ohhh how ORIGINAL." I try not to be too predictable but c'mon I couldn't completely torture the girl beyond all repair it's just not in my nature. I'm not some George R. R. Martin here. LOL. ALSO, can I just tell you how much freaking research it feels like I put into every chapter. I'm so afraid of being torn apart by die-hard enthusiasts that I'm on different websites looking up maps, names, ship models, etc. So if you see anything that doesn't completely gel with you as far as canon goes I'm sorry! I've certainly tried my best!_

 _Okay now don't judge me for this but I get absolutely giddy when I log on and see there are new reviews to read. You guys have all been so sweet and wonderful in your reviews and I love seeing the suggestions people come up with. I'm trying to make sure I'm taking my time and making the chapters good before posting them, but at the same time I'm freeing up more time atm so they seem to be coming together faster again. Hard to believe I've only been posting this for a couple of weeks. Anyways, just wanted to say thanks again for all the feedback, when I wake up in the morning the first thing I check on this phone is this site to see if anyone has said anything. Y'all awesome! Hope the plot is turning in ways that you like! There will be more plot twists to come, I promise!_


	29. XXIX The Council

"I don't understand," she sputtered, "Luke Skywalker? You-you're..."

"Kylo Ren's uncle, yes."

Feeling weak again and worrying she might pass out, Serela grabbed her mother's arms for support and Reha lead her to the weathered table, sitting her down in one of the hard wooden chairs and brushing the crumbs away. Luke came forward to take a seat across from Serela while Reha pulled another chair over in order to sit closer to her.

"Start at the beginning," she pleaded, and clasped both her mother's hands in her own, afraid to let go in case she vanished, "Don't leave anything out."

Reha sighed, "There is much to tell my love, and you still have many others who wish to speak with you today."

"If I am so important that many people want to talk to me then _they_ can wait," she said forcefully, and heard a tremor of Kylo's demeanor in her voice when she did.

Her mother's eyes widened at the attitude but she said nothing, instead launching into her explanation of everything as she remembered it transpiring.

"The two of you had just walked out the front door and I ran for the bedroom. I'd barely gotten the window open when I felt the heat from the blasts..." Serela squeezed her hands tighter, remembering that horrifying moment from her own perspective.

"Somehow, Light only knows, when I felt that blast of heat, it literally threw me through the window, just propelled me out of the house. Once I finally came to the cottage was in ruins and you and the ships were all long gone. I knew what must have happened to you, but I knew I couldn't do any good there on Takodana, and with the house destroyed and you gone there was no longer anything to stay there for."

Reha cleared her throat then, and seeing that Serela was shaking, lifted one of her hands to stroke her daughter's face, "I knew Maz Kanata still had many contacts on Takodana even after the attack on the castle. I simply traveled from village to village for a few days until I found someone who could put me in touch with the Resistance. Once I did and I explained the situation, who you were and who it was that had come to retrieve you, they sent a ship to get me the same day."

Serela looked at her mother, stunned, then over to Luke. He sat languidly in his chair, deep in silent contemplation.

"And where have you been?" she asked him directly, "Kylo went to a lot of effort to find you, but I heard from Phasma that they could never get the coordinates of your location. So how did you come to be here then?"

Luke hunched forward over the table and seemed to regard her with a leisurely curiosity. This was not a man accustomed to rushing to and fro, this was a man who possessed the Light, and large quantities of it. She peered into his mind and when she did she realised he was letting her, that he was showing and directing her to the information she sought. The island in the sea where the girl, Rey had found him, the plea to take up his light saber again and join the fight with the Resistance, to destroy the First Order and bring balance to the Force once and for all.

"But I cannot do it alone," he told her, speaking out loud. Her mother seemed nonplussed about being omitted from the internal conversation, maybe she was used to Luke Skywalker speaking to her in this way too?

"Who else then?" Serela asked, dreading his answer.

With a smile that said he knew what was in her mind, Luke replied, "I believe you already know the answer to that Serela... I need **you**... and your son."

"My son is the bastard child of a notorious mass murderer and a naive girl from a village on a feral planet, a bastard herself as I was _constantly_ reminded aboard the Finalizer. What hope can there be for him if he is raised in this environment of war and chaos?"

Luke's mouth was a fine line, and she wondered if she had offended him with her frankness.

"Serela..." he began, "There is an ancient prophecy passed down through the Jedi for generations. It told of a Chosen One who would bring _balance_ to the Force. Many believed for years that it was my father, Anakin Skywalker, or Darth Vader as you may have heard him called. Many others, however, believed that Anakin was not the Chosen One, and instead the prophecy spoke of another, yet to be born."

Serela was nervous about where this conversation was going, "So... you think my son is the Chosen One?"

"Yes Serela, I do."

She closed her eyes and tried to feel for it, the connection to the Force that had always been there, helping her, testing her, guiding her throughout her life. Was this what it had planned for her all along?

 ** _Your son will be extremely powerful, Serela,_** she could hear his voice inside her head, **_Surely the First Order must have given some explanation as to why they were so desperate to keep you there instead of killing you._**

 ** _Yes... they told me when the baby was born I was to convert to the Dark side or die. Kylo said he would become a Sith Lord, named Darth Renor; he said our child would be more important than perhaps anyone who has ever lived._**

 ** _Well, he wasn't wrong._**

 ** _Why though? I'm nobody, a bastard myself. Kylo found me in the woods one day and pursued me until I gave in and soon after I was carrying his child. I'm no one._**

Abruptly the door to the room opened and Quin walked in again, "Sorry to interrupt," he apologised, "But the General wishes to see her now."

Luke stood from his seat, "Thank you Quin, we were just finishing." His eyes locked with Serela's and she heard his promise in her head, **_We will speak again later._**

Reha stood too and helped Serela to her feet, her daughter still shaky from all that she had learned. There was so much to process, so many more questions had formed to take the place of the ones just answered, so much to think about for her and her son. Him? The so-called Chosen One?

Quin led them out, although Serela still held onto her mother's hands for dear life, refusing to let go.

This time he led them through different hallways, Reha by her side and Luke following somberly after them, his keen eyes watching every step Serela made and likely reading each thought that passed through her head.

 ** _I'm not actively trying to read your thoughts Serela, but you must work to control them around people who possess the Force. There are those who will, and have, used them against you._**

Wanting to respond but not appear crazy, Serela gave an imperceptible nod of her head to let him know she had heard and understood. She was sure no one else had noticed, but she didn't want to respond to him out loud if Quin or her mother wasn't aware that she could hear him without the aid of speech. Even though she knew she could respond to him with her thoughts as well, he intimidated her, and she wasn't sure how ready she was to talk with him again so soon before meeting this general.

Although she couldn't see it, Luke smiled at that, feeling her anxiety at meeting the general, which was something he could have allayed for her, but he sensed her hesitancy to continue conversing with him this way for the time being, so he abstained.

As they reached a wide metal door at the end of a hallway, Serela gripped Reha's hands tighter, walking steadily towards it but slowing her pace as if hoping she could hold off on this meeting just a little while longer. She knew nothing about the general, only that she was a woman of power, and likely was used to being obeyed, much like Kylo. Serela wasn't sure if she was interested in trading one dictatorial captor over another.

"This is it," Quin informed her, and she looked expectantly from her mother to the door, waiting for Reha to indicate she was coming in with her.

"Oh, er...um..." Quin fumbled, "The meeting is between you and the general alone." He looked at her apologetically, and Serela began to protest when she was interrupted, the tears already beginning to resurface.

"It will be alright," Reha promised, "I will still be here when you are done."

Serela sniffled, "But... the last time I let go of you I almost lost you."

Reha hugged her close, tears spilling into her daughters hair and when she pulled away the front of her shirt was wet with Serela's own. "That was a different day, a different time. We're in a new place, on an entirely separate planet. We are safer here, with more people to protect us. On Takodana we had no one with such ability," she caressed the crown of Serela's head, "Don't be afraid to let me go right now my love, I'm not going anywhere."

With that, Reha kissed her daughter on the forehead and turned on her heel to follow Luke, leaving Serela with no other choice but to comply. She watched until they had rounded a corner and left her sight though, before looking back at Quin and then facing towards the door. The lump in her throat felt large, and she felt as though she could imagine every negative outcome of this meeting and not a single good one. Was this general going to treat her to a long exposition about her poor choices in relationships, or threaten her to give up the baby just as Kylo and Hux had, or maybe even something far worse that Serela couldn't wrap her mind around yet?

There was only one way to get the answers she needed, and it was through that door. She remembered this same situation days ago when she had stood outside Kylo's room with Phasma, feeling her fear and counting to 5, each number calming her until she was ready to walk in and face whatever was ahead.

She started to count, closing her eyes and feeling Quin's tension next to her as he deliberated whether to gently coax her into opening the door or do it for her. Almost immediately she felt a spurt of that raw power flowing through her, letting her see into his mind and watch as the decision clicked into place for him to open it for her. Without even realising she was doing it, Serela's hand reached up and stopped his from grabbing the doorknob. She felt his fear when he saw that she was holding his arm at bay without even touching him, and as his fear escalated hers began to shrink. By the time she reached 4 she was clearheaded and ready, opening her eyes in determination.

5... This time there was no Kylo to throw open the door for her, and she reached for it herself, turning the cold knob in her hand and pulling hard, the rusted metal from years of use screeched as she wrenched it open. She stepped inside and took a look back at Quin, who nodded before taking his leave. This really was just her and the general.

Serela's eyes surveyed the room. Another sparsely decorated chamber, with a bed in the far right corner, a table for eating and a long sofa for sitting, the only color other than the palate of browns and grays came from the throw rug in front of the sofa, a kaleidoscope of reds, oranges and blues, so dazzling in it's complexity that it threw off the tone of the rest of the room, somehow seeming to lighten it.

There next to the table stood a woman; she was of a medium build and graying hair that she kept pinned up in a careful plait, but she didn't give the air of someone who spent an inordinate amount of time on her appearance. She was dressed in a plain outfit, cream tunic with a collar and vest, her shirt tucked into brown pants with a belt and badly worn out boots. This woman looked every bit the general of the Resistance, and Serela was painfully aware now that she was still in the hospital gown and robe she'd been wearing since she woke up.

"Hello Serela," the general spoke first, "I was glad to hear you'd woken, I hope your journey here was not unduly stressful after everything else you've been through." When she spoke of undue stress, her eyes had gravitated straight to Serela's stomach. Self-consciously she tried to cover herself with the flaps of her robe, hoping to somehow conceal what was now becoming very noticeable.

"There's no need to hide dear, I've been pregnant before myself. It's a very natural thing."

Serela wanted to reply that it wasn't natural to be impregnated and kidnapped by one of the most feared men in the galaxy and held against your will for months with the knowledge that you would like be murdered immediately after giving birth, but she held her tongue, waiting to see what the general would say next.

Both women regarded each other silently for a moment, Serela still holding the doorknob as though she had not decided yet whether to flee.

Finally the general broke the silence by huffing her shoulders with a sigh, "I'm sorry, this is not the circumstances I would have ever chosen for our first meeting.

Serela still did not respond. This woman was so intimidating, and yet there was something about her that seemed familiar somehow, as though she knew her from someone or somewhere...

The general gestured to the couch behind her, "Please, come sit."

Although she was terrified, Serela obeyed, finally releasing her hold on the doorknob and moving unsteadily towards the couch. When she sat down the general seated herself across from Serela in a wooden dining chair she'd pulled over from the table.

"Are you hungry, thirsty or anything?" the woman across from her began.

Serela found her voice, "No, thank you."

"Well, I hope during your stay here you will be very comfortable. A life in the Resistance is not luxurious by any means, but we always have enough to get by," her wrinkled face smiled affably at Serela when she spoke, and her words were genuine.

Still defensive, Serela responded without missing a beat, "If you've spoken with my mother you'll know I've never lived in any place that could be considered luxurious. We're used to working hard, and I hope to be able to do here as well."

"Yes, I have only spoken to your mother briefly a few times, but the life she described on Takodana sounded very primitive yet idyllic. I think you'll find that life here can be much the same." Serela tried to see into her head without her noticing. Most of her mind was a steel trap, no doubt knowledgeable with how to block out Force-users from seeing things she did not wish them to see. What she could find was a woman with a bruised heart and a wounded spirit. From what though she could not tell.

"I appreciate you're trying to make me feel welcome, but regardless of how life here is done, there is nothing that can replace the life I lost on Takodana: the places and people and memories that were taken from me."

"Believe it or not, I'm very well acquainted with what the First Order has the potential to take away."

Serela tensed, "How? I'm sorry, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but what have they taken from you? I still don't even know your name." She knew she was probably overstepping her bounds here but she had come in here for answers, and she intended to leave with them.

The woman across from her smiled sadly, and replied with a sentence she knew would answer both questions at once, "I am General Leia Organa, and I am Kylo Ren's mother."

Serela gasped, and for a minute she was sure her body was falling through some limitless space with no bottom to hit. It was as if she was falling and falling and there was no end in sight. Kylo's mother? No! This couldn't be her! The woman Kylo had told her very little bit about, who had sent him away to study with Luke when he was still such a small child. This was the woman he had been talking about, sitting across from her now? It felt like the very ground beneath her was shuddering with this revelation.

"So you know that your son..."

"Is the father of your baby, yes," she quipped, somehow giving the impression that she did not find this conversation at all awkward, "You're carrying my only grandchild," the small hint of a smile was playing on her lips.

"How..." Serela started to ask, but then...

"Your mother contacted the Resistance from a remote village on Takodana where we still had field operatives, when she explained the situation and the danger that you and the child were in, I felt we had no choice but to become involved... for everyone's sake." Leia's story was so far the same as Reha's, but now Serela could feel herself beginning to hyperventilate, this was all too much. On top of everything else she was processing, here she was sitting in the same room with the grandmother of her baby, and up until Leia's revelation she'd had no idea.

"You sent the men to find me, didn't you? Not the Resistance as a whole, but _you?_ "

"I did," Leia nodded, "I admit we undertook a considerable risk in coming to rescue you, but the result was monumentally worth it."

Serela's throat tightened, and afraid she would start crying again, she tried to find a spot on the colorful rug to fixate on, instead of looking into the kind, motherly eyes of her baby's grandmother sitting across from her. _Worth it_ Leia had said, _Risking so many lives to rescue her was worth it, but worth it for who? Leia or the Resistance?_

"I feel so lost," she admitted, burying her face in her hands, cheeks hot with embarrassment. Next to her, she felt the sinking feeling of another body sitting next to her, and then Leia's surprisingly soft hands rubbing her back in comfort. "I understand," the older woman told her, "I feel the same way oftentimes, but there is nothing to be done but to forge through it."

A sob escaped Serela and Leia drew closer, wrapping her arms around her shoulders and rocking her, "Shh, I know dear, I know."

"You can't! You can't have any idea what this is like! Months ago I was no one, then suddenly I meet your son and in a matter of weeks I'm swept up into this strange world I want no part in and a life I never asked for! I'm being hunted by multiple people and they all want something from me, they want _my baby_ , and they want him for their own reasons my wishes be damned! Every day I was locked inside a room with one person for company and a physician came by once a day to make sure I was healthy enough _for the baby_. Other than that I was completely alone. In a small room, with no sunlight, no friendly faces, just masks and masks and lewd threats from Hux! All the while trying to keep this life inside of me safe when the only thing anyone around me wants to do is cut my body open and pull him from me for their own nefarious purposes!" Serela could hear herself screaming every word by the end of her rant, and Leia sat stoically, listening to all of it with a patience that could only come from years of practice.

"I know you may find this hard to believe," she began, her tone very serious, "But we did not cross the galaxy to rescue you so we could treat you as the First Order did. As your son's grandmother I will have opinions on what you do, but so will your own mother. However, as a free woman who is of age you will be the one who makes the final decisions for yourself and your baby. Unless you plan to negligently place yourself or him in harm, I will not cross those boundaries and stop you from anything you decide to do. I will try to always give opinions, and not orders. But you must also remember that I am responsible for many others, and when I make decisions I have to take the good of the galaxy into account too. I believe you've already met my brother, Luke?"

Serela nodded, still turning over the speech Leia had given in her head, "Yes, he was with my mother when Quin took me to her."

"I thought so," Leia's tone softened, "He is, as I'm sure you know, the last known living Jedi. Currently, he has undertaken the task of training Rey, a girl who retrieved him from his self-isolation recently, and instructing her in the ways of the Force."

Continuing to nod, Serela did not yet understand what this had to do with her.

"My dear, I want Luke to train you as well."

Dumbfounded, Serela stared at Leia as if she had just grown three heads, and spluttered, "Me? A Jedi?"

Leia's countenance did not waver under Serela's disbelief, "Yes, I understand that you have been unusually strong with the Force from a young age, though you did not call it that, and that your powers are considerable for one lacking proper training. My hope is that if you agree to it, you might be able to grow even stronger, and help the Resistance in our fight against the First Order, as well as protecting your son."

The last part resonated strongest in her, and Serela held back from voicing the concern she most wanted answered, _What about Kylo?_ Instead she chewed the inside of her lip thoughtfully, contemplating the offer set before her. "I will think about it," was all the answer she gave.

Even though Leia sensed that there was something Serela was not saying, her heart and her mind was burdened with a question of her own, and she left the topic of training with Luke where it was in favour of voicing what she had waited for weeks to know.

"Serela..." she began, "I want to ask you something very personal, and if you're not ready to tell me or if it is too painful I understand, but I have needed to know since I was informed of your condition."

Leia's watery eyes met Serela's own and she could tell that whatever Leia was about to ask was taking a great deal out of her. When she tried to peruse Leia's thoughts she instantly hit a wall again, this time much sooner than the last, and she relented. Hesitant, but curious, she nodded her head that she was ready to hear it.

At first Leia seemed to start asking, then paused, and finally she stumbled through the words in a rush, "Did my son... er, Kylo... Did he force you?"

Humiliated, Serela could feel her face redden deeper than it ever had in her memory. Hastily, she shook her head 'no', hoping that would be sufficient and Leia wouldn't feel the need for anymore details. In spite of her mortification, Serela saw Leia's face instantly relax, as though a great weight had been lifted off of her shoulders by this simple admission.

"So it was love then?"

Serela swallowed hard and wiped away the moisture from her eyes before nodding her head 'yes'.

"Thank you my dear." Leia paused again, looking down at her lap thoughtfully, "I am sorry for how things have gone with him, but I am grateful at least that whatever you shared at the time leading to this was something both of you wanted."

When both women looked at each other again, there were fresh tears on each face. With a sad laugh, Leia reached over to wipe Serela's away with her thumb, cupping her face softly and recalling the gentle way Kylo had always done the same.

"I miss him so much," she blurted out, and before she could regret the admission she heard Leia's tortured reply, "I miss him too."

(~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

An hour later, Serela found herself following Leia into a meeting with the Resistance council. Still wary of her place her amongst so many war heroes and strategists, she stood against the wall furthest from the door, hoping to attract as little attention as possible and listen only, until she felt more confident in her position as refugee of the First Order.

More people sauntered in, most standing around a large octagon-shaped table with various buttons and levers or opting for a similar stance against the wall. A gold droid with a red arm stood nearby and she tried to remember if she'd heard of him before from Kylo. She recalled his mention of two droids in particular, but their alpha-numerical names had long been lost to her memory.

"C-3PO," Leia called to him across the table, "Please find our new guest in the back a chair to sit in. She is still very tired from her long journey."

Obediently, the droid retrieved a chair and brought it to her, bowing as he introduced himself and returning to his spot at the table. Serela watched Quin walk in and when she caught his eyes he winked at her, bringing a small smile to her face.

Thankfully, Leia had the foresight to realise that Serela would not be comfortable attending this meeting with her while still wearing a hospital gown and bath robe. Before leaving Leia's chambers, a young woman in similar clothing to Leia had brought another drab outfit for Serela, the monotone colours nothing like she would have chosen on Takodana, but far better than any of the cavernous black apparel the First Order had provided for her.

Her mother had been omitted from the meeting simply because she was busy in the kitchens assisting some of the cooks after one had been relieved for coming in sick. Serela was reassured multiple times by Leia that immediately following the meeting they would be reunited. After that they could share her mother's temporary room on the base until they decided where they would like to permanently reside whilst living on D'Qar.

"Of course for the baby's sake I would prefer you stay as close here as possible for protection, but at this time I will not force you. It is your choice whether to live on the base or not," she had said, and Serela had been grateful for her words.

At last the final necessary member ambled in and took his spot at the table, as other, less important members she assumed were relegated to standing at the walls. She noted that she was the only one sitting down, and felt especially self-conscious, hoping no one would even notice her being in here at all.

Leia opened the meeting, "Thank you for joining us Serela, considering all that you have gone through up until recently it speaks very highly of you to use what energy you have to be here at this council meeting." So much for the idea of going unnoticed.

Serela gave a weak smile and looked around the table at the others present, most were human, although there were other species represented as well as many different human ethnicities. Many were also young, although she supposed it wasn't frequent for members of the Resistance to make it into old age. A trio of three people who looked about her own age stood together in the corner, a tall man with dark skin and a face deep in concentration, a thin woman, beautiful and waifish-looking (although Serela wasn't one to criticise anybody's wardrobe or appearance these days) and a roguish man of medium build, with swarthy, caramel-colored skin and dark hair like chocolate. All three looked friendly, but intense, and Serela told herself that they were likely a tight-knit group with no need of anyone else.

"This meeting will be brief," Leia explained, "But I wanted to gather us here so Serela could have a general understanding of how things work and who she will be living amongst while she is under Resistance protection indefinitely." Most eyes were still on Leia, but many had drifted back to Serela, including those of the three in the corner, making her look down at her hands in order to avoid their silent questions, saving herself from further embarrassment.

"Serela has been aboard the Finalizer for the last several months, and she is currently in her 5th month of pregnancy. She will have vital information about the First Order, not necessarily their plans, but their habits, their goals and the layout of their ship." Serela was thankful Leia had not made mention of whom it was that had left her in this pregnant state, although her common sense told her that most of those present already knew.

"Won't the First Order attempt to attack us here, in retaliation for rescuing her?" a Mon Calamari in the front posed his question, the whiskers on his chin wobbling when he spoke.

"They might," a small man with a salt-and-pepper hair spoke up to answer, "And up until recently that might have been disastrous for us, but since their super weapon the Starkiller base was destroyed months ago, we have no need to fear a catastrophic attack the likes of which we almost faced, at least not yet."

"But won't they attack in other ways? General Hux will stop at nothing, nor will Snoke or Kylo Ren to find me. They'll reduce this planet to dust for coming to my rescue," Serela almost clapped her hand over her own mouth in alarm that she had just spoken out of turn amongst so many of these important figures, but this was the question she knew would haunt her every minute it was left unanswered.

The salt-and-pepper man looked directly at her and spoke with respect, as if he somehow regarded her very highly in spite of her predicament. "They will come, that much is certain, it's more a question of who and when rather than if, but we have a stronghold here, and they will be on an even playing field with us. Actually, we will have the advantage of home defense."

"Thank you Admiral Statura," Leia chimed in, "We know the First Order's weakness now, and it is Serela's child. They will stop at nothing to acquire the baby, and Serela while she carries it. Her protection, and the baby's, are of paramount importance to the Resistance now. We cannot allow them to be taken. It could spell the end of the galaxy as we know it."

"Why is the child so important to the First Order?" the young man with the rogue-ish face and tanned skin was asking from his place in the corner.

Luke stepped forward from the shadows where he had been listening to all of this, and all eyes turned to him for his answer.

"The child she carries will be born of a heavy mix of the Light and the Dark side. Depending on who raises him, he will either be a beacon of hope for the Light and eventually bring balance to the Force, or he will be a product of pure Darkness, programmed from birth for only evil and destruction. If his powers are anywhere near as potent as I foresee, this would spell disaster for us and the Resistance."

"Well, who is the father?" a female towards one of the back corners had spoken up, and the atmosphere of the room immediately turned tense with the awkwardness. Serela kept her eyes fixed on the floor, she couldn't bear to see how many of their faces were staring at her. She had assumed most of those present were aware of her son's parentage, she wished she could sink into the wall when they all learned it in unison.

Leia cleared her throat and answered, "For those who are still unaware, the father of the baby is Kylo Ren."

Hushed whispers erupted all around her and Serela closed her eyes trying to drown them out, but their unguarded thoughts spoke louder than their words.

 ** _Leia's son is the father?_**

 ** _Her grandson?_**

 ** _This girl let that monster touch her?_**

Trying not to cry, Serela chanced a look up at the faces and saw most were too busy conversing with each other as Leia stood by, allowing them to voice their queries to each other before continuing. When Serela looked in the corner at the trio again, the thin girl and the dark-skinned man were conversing with each other, but the man who had asked the question about why her son was so important was staring straight at her. His face was not contorted in anger though, or disgust or revulsion, it was a strange mix of confusion and pity, which she thought was somehow worse.

"Ladies and gentleman," Leia finally interrupted them, and Serela could feel the atmosphere of the room change as all attention snapped dutifully back to their general.

"There will be many more questions that you undoubtedly have, and I ask that you respectfully direct them to me at this time, and not Serela. She had been under too much stress already for a woman in her condition, and for the health and safety of her and the child, we will only require of her what little we can in the months until the baby's arrival. Anyone who disgrees with this may come and see me." The emphasis on her last statement was severe, and Serela had little doubts that it would not be obeyed.

"So what are the next steps?" a heavier-set man in an orange pilot suit was asking.

Admiral Stattura spoke again, "Wexley, you, Dameron, Pava, Asty and Nunb will lead the other pilots in drills every day this week, specifically focusing on evasive maneuvers with the newer recruits. While we've had no new communication from the First Order since Serela's retrieval, their counter-attack is bound to come soon and it is bound to be hard. We must be ready to meet them when it does."

"Yes sir," the man in orange replied, keeping his eyes directed at his superiors.

"Any more questions?" Stattura asked, surveying the room, while Serela held her breath in the corner.

When no one else spoke Leia told the room, "Dismissed," and the small crowd began to disperse, most talking softly and heading for the door.

Serela kept her head down and her eyes fixed on her feet in the battered pair of boots they had supplied her with until she saw the rippling brown robes of Luke appear before her.

Looking up, she noticed most of the room had been vacated, with only one or two staying behind to question Leia, including, she noted, the swarthy man from the corner who had stared at her after the big revelation.

Anxious to be out of this room with him and any other who might pity her, Serela took Luke's hand when he reached down and offered it to her, and stood to her feet. Even though she knew she would break down as soon as she was safe in the confines of a room with her mother, she was determined to hold herself together until she had the luxury of doing so in private.

Hastily, she walked past Leia and her prying subordinates, keeping her eyes down when she passed the man and tugging Luke in the direction she had come, just wanting to get out of sight and earshot before anything else.

When she felt confident they were far enough down the hallway to avoid being heard, she stopped and waited for him to pass her, his wise eyes regarding her perceptively when he paused in front of her. Unbidden, she heard his words in her head again, but instead of refusing she forced herself to listen and respond, knowing that while she was here this was likely the most private kind of conversation she could have.

 ** _You are anxious to be here, why?_**

 ** _Because I'm putting everyone on this base and this planet in danger with my presence, including my mother and the family of my child._**

 ** _This may be true, but have you considered that these people WANT to help you? That they consider you and your baby important enough to merit helping even in spite of the danger?_**

 ** _You heard them in there! I know you heard their thoughts too! They think I'm a fool for letting myself ever get so close to a monster. They have no idea what Kylo was like when he was with me; how different he was than anywhere else. If I had known him for who he was I would never have let him seduce me, but now all anyone will see when they look at me is what everyone on the Finalizer saw: Kylo Ren's WHORE._**

 ** _But you are not a whore, Serela. Far from it. You must learn to balance what you know in your heart with what you know in your head. Regardless of what anyone thinks about you, it is not based on more than a few facts, whereas you know the whole story. Give it time, people will warm to you quicker than you think. Don't let your experiences with the first order poison you for all interactions with people outside of Takodana._**

Footsteps were approaching and Serela felt a warm hand on her shoulder, then her mother's soothing voice, "Hello, my love, have you eaten?"

"I'm not hungry," Serela croaked, and she felt the tears already beginning to come. She hoped the room was close by or the halls were at least empty for dinnertime.

"Come," Reha mercifully told her, sensing her distress, "We will rest here tonight and then discuss more in the morning. Leia has given us a room not far from here."

Luke followed them as they traipsed down the corridors, and try as she might to guard her mind from him she knew he could probably read everything going through her head. By the time they had reached the door to their room Serela was drawing deep, shuddering breaths in an attempt to keep herself calm. When Reha opened the door her daughter allowed the floodgates to open too, and quickly Reha ushered her to one of the small beds to sit while she held her close, rocking her back and forth as the tears poured out, Luke watching from the doorway.

Instead of abating, the crying only began to worsen as Serela felt the impact of every possible negative repercussion to her being here, leaving her in hysterics. She saw visions of men and women strewn across the ground outside like garbage, their bodies dismembered and disregarded as Kylo and the stormtroopers walked among them. There was Luke's body, bent and broken, his lightsaber hilt still in his hand. Kylo stooped to pick it up and she saw in his arms he held a baby, _their baby_ , his soft skin covered in fresh blood and eyes closed in peaceful slumber. When they passed by the body of his dead uncle she could see behind him another body lying haphazardly on the ground, soaked in dried blood. Approaching closer, she looked and saw her own face looking blankly up at the sky, a huge red gash left across her stomach and her mouth open in a silent scream.

Shrieking in spite of herself, Serela could feel Reha shaking her here in the present, and struggled to leave the vision, but the image of her own cold, dead eyes staring into nothingness would haunt her for months to come.

Sobbing into her mother's lap, she could hear the sound of Luke approaching from the doorway, and then two fingers on her head. "Please," she begged, and she felt a cooling sensation in her temple as she began to lose consciousness, slurring her words "Please please don't leave me."

Reha held her daughter in her arms as Luke put her to sleep, "I won't Serela, I will never leave you again."

 _Sorry if you were expecting an update from Kylo's perspective. I know I usually do them alternatively, but since this chapter was picking up right where the last one left off I thought it would feel jumbled if I threw a different perspective in there between the two. Sorry if it threw anyone for a loop! Kylo's reaction will be the next one I promise! I just had so much in my head regarding what Serela was going through and I needed to get it all out there! **ALSO** , sorry it took so long to update! This chapter took a lot out of me because I really wanted to make sure I got it right but there was **A LOT** going on in it, so I decided to take my time, and hopefully the final result shows that. The chapters seem to keep getting longer and longer now! Thanks again for all the reviews and feedback! Now that I'm about to start my new job with more downtime I can hopefully get ahead a bit with the story and keep spacing out the chapters to one every day. :)_


	30. XXX The Resolve

He had run for the loading bay, abandoning all pretext of calm, resolved power in his desperate bid to catch them when he felt her slipping away. If the stormtroopers had been unable to retain her, there was no one else on this ship save for him who had a chance. However, when his feet had finally carried him through the same entrance she and her two rescuers had used minutes before, he arrived just in time to see the retreating lights of the X-Wing fighter as it entered lightspeed.

The entire landing bay seemed to freeze, all waiting to see what Kylo Ren would do, and he did not disappoint. His lightsaber ignited and he turned to the nearest TIE fighter where he began to slash with all his might, roaring with furious rage at each laceration. Stormtroopers at each corner tried to walk away as discreetly as possible, not wanting to be the one he unleashed his temper on next.

Hux's footsteps behind him drew his attention away from the ragged steel remains of the ship.

"Problem Ren?"

His smug expression was so ill-timed, his tone so condescending, Kylo felt his fury reach a fever pitch. Raising his arm back to swing at Hux with the saber, he was stopped by his next patronising words: "You'll have a hard time finding her without me."

Kylo paused the blade in mid-air and retracted it, ignoring the curious stormtroopers all watching to see if he would really cleave their general in half during his tantrum.

"I already know where they'll have taken her," he growled from inside his mask, "It's no secret the main Resistance base is on D'Qar. Give me one good reason why I need you alive to take on that planet."

"Because with Phasma dead now I am the last senior General of this ship. Without me you will have an almost impossible time managing the fleet. You might be the leader of the Knights of Ren, but you are no general."

More than anything in that moment, Kylo wanted to finish what he had begun and swing his blade down onto Hux's head, rending him in two. He wanted to take out all his frustration and disappointment and even fear that she had somehow escaped from him forever, and he felt a familiar sensation inside him that had been gone since his reconditioning, only surfacing for a moment one other time, when Serela had shown him her memories in his chambers.

This time however, the flickering of the candle inside him burned brighter, and though the Darkness pressed in again, it could not put it out entirely. He felt his love for her again, a faint sensation, but with roots that went deep. His possessiveness and jealousy were there too, but for the first time in a long time, he felt that affection, that very real feeling that she was the thing grounding him from completely surrendering to the Dark and instead pulling him back to the Light, that her _love_ was his salvation.

Hux was looking at him with eyes narrowed in confusion and Ren finally shook his head, ending his reverie and with that the darkness encompassed the flame again, but the memories of the feeling remained.

"I said: We should go to Snoke and explain what has happened," Hux repeated himself slowly as if he was speaking to a small child.

Kylo did not give him the courtesy of a response. Instead he walked straight ahead, his shoulder hitting Hux's hard as he passed by wordlessly. His feet carried him down the hallways and he staved off his inclination to destroy more things along the way. Every time he thought about the fact that she was gone, that he had been thwarted from keeping her here, he grew angrier and angrier.

Hux followed close behind him, which he knew, but was still unwilling to halt his pace and wait for him. The Darkness had forced its way back in and now he was filled with a blind rage that the Resistance had the gall to come here and take away what was his.

Upon reaching Snoke's throne room Kylo gave a wave of his hand and the doors SWOOSHED open, revealing Snoke's hologram already waiting, as Kylo knew he would be.

"So..." Snoke began, not waiting for Kylo to reach his feet before asking, "Is the girl lost to us?"

"No Supreme Leader, the Resistance managed to pilfer her from under our noses but there is only one place they could have taken her and I intend to strike back **hard**."

"A worthy goal, my apprentice, but how to carry it out?"

"An immediate reconnaissance mission must begin. The men who boarded the ship to rescue her also disabled the hyperdrive, therefore eliminating our ability to travel at lightspeed. With that they also destroyed much of our supplies to repair it with, so the journey to D'Qar will take several weeks, possibly even longer than a month, during which time we can make plans for our assault and recovery of the girl." Kylo's tone was flat, betraying none of the emotions he had battled with on his way here.

"Supreme Leader," Hux's repugnant voice rang out in the chamber as he finally entered behind Kylo, "Emotionally, the girl is heavily damaged but she still does have strong quantities of the Force. We will likely need leverage against her if we are to coax her out of the Resistance base. There must be an air assault, yes, which will help us to significantly weaken them, but likely there will be heavy fighting on the ground as well, which we and our troops must be prepared for."

"Did your efforts with her go unrewarded then?"

Kylo, assuming Snoke was talking to him, opened his mouth to reply that he had not met with her again following their last meeting when Hux responded instead, drawing his attention.

"Yes, Supreme Leader. The torture was very effective. While I could tell she tried to keep me from seeing, even someone with no knowledge of the Force could tell she was more than visibly affected."

"Good. The more unstable we can make her, the easier it will be to sway her when the time comes."

Hux and Snoke were smiling grimly at each other while Kylo stared at Hux open-mouthed.

"I...thought...I made...it clear...she was NOT...to...be... ** _touched_** _..."_

The superior look he received from Hux told him the decision to forge ahead with his plans to torture her had not been something he'd done without permission from Snoke himself. When Kylo tried to look into Hux's thoughts, the general let him in willingly, gleefully calling to mind how he had forced her down into the chair, with Phasma held between two stormtroopers as he clumsily chopped at every strand of hair she had.

Enraged, Kylo looked to Snoke, "You allowed this?" he shouted.

"I did, your methods of persuasion were taking longer than I wanted to wait, and when Hux came up with a plan that would not cause harm to the fetus, I made the decision to go ahead with it."

Kylo was fuming, his whole body shook where he stood as he tried to control himself in front of Snoke, but he was not succeeding.

"You are angry, Ren," Snoke observed, "Use that anger, channel it for the Dark side and use it to find her and bring her back here, one way or another."

He wanted to scream, to destroy everything he could and cut down Hux where he stood before stabbing at the hologram. Dark side or not, she was _his_ and _no one_ else was allowed to touch her.

"I see your jealousy for her, that is also valuable. But remember your place here, your commitment to the Dark side. You swore to me that if she refused to release her position on the Light, you would kill her yourself. Is that still the case Ren?"

Hux snorted and without thinking Kylo lunged over and punched him in the jaw, sending his smug ginger face sprawling on the floor, landing dangerously close to the edge of the walkway. Kylo did not even glance at him again, straightening his robes and looking up at Snoke's impervious face, "How's that for using my anger Supreme Leader?"

He expected Snoke to berate him, call him childish and immature, but instead he saw the leering smile return and when his lips spoke they said only one word, "Good."

(~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Kylo wasn't sure what he expected to see when he went into her chambers. Perhaps he just wanted to check for himself that what he already knew and felt was true; that she was really gone.

Once the doors opened and he strode in, he was assaulted by the foul stench of blood, and looked down at the gory mess of hair intermingled with the red liquid. All of her hair. All of it. Indeed he wasn't sure how she could have been left with any following what had happened. Some stormtroopers had come in soon after word of Phasma's death and taken her body down with them to the incinerator. There was no glorious funeral, no celebration of life or service or duty in the First Order. Everyone here served their purpose to the Dark Side and was then discarded when they took their last breath. Some were certainly more valuable than others, but their bodies all met the same end if it occurred on this ship.

He sat down on the bed and gathered the thin blanket in his hands, bringing it up to his nose so he could smell her scent again. The covers had long gone cold but he tried to imagine how warm they had been wrapped around her here in this bed day after day and night after night. How many times had he wanted to come in here and wrap himself around her, keeping her warm in the chilly room with his naked body against hers? If only she hadn't been so stubborn, if she had been willing to amend her ways and embrace the Dark as he had, they could have shared a room _and_ a bed together, no more guards or supervised visits to the medical bay. She would have been the unquestionable queen of this ship, but instead she had chosen her pride and her upbringing, she had chosen the Light over him and even their baby.

Angry again, he stood and kicked aside the grotesque pile of hair that resembled a large, bloody bird's nest and headed for the door. Snoke was right, he had sworn to bring her here, to give their child as a veritable offering to the First Order and the Dark Side. He had come too far to fail now.

When he waved his hand and shut the doors behind him with a hiss, he looked down the hallway, contemplating his next move. A lone stormtrooper came walking down the hall on patrol and stopped when he saw him.

"Go and tell General Hux I've given orders to change course immediately. Starting right now we concentrate all our efforts onto making our way toward D'Qar."

 _Okay, I know compared to the last two chapters this was incredibly short but until they're reunited the majority of the plot will likely be focusing on Serela and her character development as well as the others in the Resistance. I feel like we all pretty much know the personalities of the First Order by now and I've gotten complaints about Hux so I'm going to kill two birds with one stone and try to avoid mentioning him for a couple of chapters. There might be minor flashes but unless I change my mind expect the next 1-3 chapters to be mostly set on D'Qar._

 _I hope this chapter didn't seem rushed. Honestly I feel a bit pigeonholed with Kylo's perspective at the moment because of course he's going to be stuck on the ship for a while and there's only so many variations I can do on his perspective of it. I'll try my best to make the next one better, but I'm already deep into writing the next one on D'Qar so I wanted to get this one squared away so I could concentrate on that. Tomorrow is my first day at a new job so wish me luck! Fingers crossed it really has as much downtime as they said so I can write write write all day!_


	31. XXXI The Request

"Hold still," Reha scolded, her furtive eyes deep in concentration as she made the final snips, "Almost finished."

Serela kept her head bent down as her mother tried to salvage what she could of her hair. Most had been chopped so unevenly that they'd had to cut it all to the shortest length Hux had left, which was around her shoulders. Even there random pieces were left with jagged cuts and haphazard angles, but when she finally looked in the bathroom mirror at her mother's final project, it was a monumental improvement on what it had been when she arrived.

"It'll grow back," Reha promised, smoothing the strands and squeezing Serela's shoulder for comfort. She couldn't remember seeing her daughter with hair this short since she was a young child, and it was a strange sensation for her. The women on this planet all wore their hair differently from one another, Leia one way, Dr. Kalonia another, that young girl about Serela's age even wore hers in a series of three buns. When she had asked Serela how she wanted to style her hair after the cut was finished she had mumbled something about leaving it alone, opting to wear it down naturally where it just brushed her shoulders. In time when it was longer Serela said she might like it braided again, but until that happened she would wear it as close to how it had been on Takodana as possible.

The morning after her first council meeting Reha and Serela had discussed where they would stay and decided on an area where Reha had been living temporarily until they informed her of Serela's impending rescue. Then she had moved into the barracks on base, she said, but always with the hope that after arriving Serela would want to reside with her there.

Leia had not been thrilled at the choice, but true to her word, she made her opinion on the safety outside of the base known and then said no more about it.

Their new place of residence was more of an encampment no more than a 10 minute walk from the base. It was accessible through a narrow dirt path, and Serela was delighted to see it was laid out amongst the trees, their dense cover and foliage reminding her of home on Takodana.

The natives here were similar to home too, though their structures were more primitive and closer together. Instead of houses or cottages most everyone resided in elaborately makeshift tents. Many were incredibly detailed while others were more simple, ranging from a basic A-frame to ones with multiple rooms. One common denominator was that all were decorated in a patchwork quilt of colors, the fabric of the tents made from leftover cloths from anywhere they could find, ranging from old base uniforms to worn out Resistance flags. Everywhere she went the air smelled of green plants and clear skies, and at all times there was the light breeze which rustled through the camp, cooling its inhabitants and lightly jostling the hundreds of miscellaneous wind chimes that seemed to hang from every tree, their delicate strings dangling a myriad assortment of wood, glass and shells.

Serela had only needed a few moments here to realise why her mother had chosen it over the relative safety of the base; here felt familiar, here felt like home.

It was easy to move her in since she had nothing with her except for the clothes she'd been issued upon arriving as well as a few extra tunics and pairs of trousers. Reha promised that there was a woman in the camp who sold fabric, and that she would trade some of the mushrooms she collected early in the mornings in order to make Serela another dress; one with more allowance for her expanding belly.

The baby was more active now. It seemed the happier and more at ease his mother felt, the more comfortable he was to list from side to side in her womb, making his presence known.

She had worried Reha might resent the baby, maybe blaming him for his mother's mistakes and all the misfortune that had befallen them since his conception. All her worrying was in vain though, because everyday Reha would greet the baby inside her daughter as if he were already here in her arms. She talked to him, cooing and coming up with nicknames in lieu of Serela deciding on a real one yet. Her calloused hands would lightly rub Serela's stomach and rest her cheek against it, humming old lullabies she had forgotten she knew.

Leia was more reserved of course, understanding her role as paternal grandmother came with more restrictions, and it would not call for such displays of affection, especially considering the absence of the baby's father. Still, she offered what support she could, sending Serela some old fabric of her own she had on hand to finish covering the three room tent Reha had devised, with one main room at the tent entrance and two smaller areas branching off from it with just enough space for a bedroll each. Serela was grateful for the gift, but even more so the day Leia came down carrying a small blue blanket. By the looks of it, this blanket had been well loved long before.

"It was Ben's...er, Kylo Ren's," she corrected herself with embarrassment, "He slept with it every night from birth until one day when he was 4 and suddenly he hit a growth spurt. It was like he went to bed one night and it covered him fine but the next morning his legs were too long to fit under it anymore, so I packed it away." She smiled warmly at the memory, and Serela felt the affection rolling off of her in waves. "He was always such a tall boy after that," she gushed, "Just like his father."

"IS," Serela corrected her, and slipped her hand over Leia's in a kind gesture, "Leia you may not believe me but somewhere in there is still your son. I saw him and knew him for myself. Even though I may have known him as Kylo Ren, that name turned out to belong to the monster. It's clear to me now that the man I loved was your Ben, perhaps as he would have been under different circumstances. Regardless, one day we'll find a way to bring him back to us and to his son."

Leia balked at Serela's directness, but relaxed, "I hope you're right," she murmured.

"I know I am," Serela told her.

All this had occurred within the first week of her arrival on D'Qar, and by and large the Resistance had left Serela (with the exception of Leia's visits) to herself so as to acclimate to her new surroundings. Leia told her as much in one of her visits, and Serela was grateful for the gesture.

Everyday now she took walks; her limbs beginning to stretch and feel strong again after so many months of being sedentary. The feeling of sunlight on her face again, wind in her hair and fresh air in her lungs seemed to revive her more than anything else had since the day of her abduction by the First Order.

Sometimes Reha walked with her. Sometimes, when she could get away long enough, Leia would, and together they would talk and laugh as she regaled Serela with tales of Ben Solo and his childhood antics. She spoke of the son she had loved and lost, and the man he had chosen to become. Most of the time though Serela walked alone, exploring the nearby forest and enjoying the time to meditate and be with her thoughts as she processed all of this newness.

Eventually, a little over two weeks after arriving on D'Qar, there came the day when Luke finally chose to visit them for the first time since she had met him after waking up in this strange, new place. Hearing murmurs in the main room of the tent, Serela stirred in her bed roll, stretching her stiff muscles and staring up at the roof of her partition of the tent. The voices seemed to grow louder and she could feel Luke in her mind, realising it must be him who was here. She rolled onto her knees and pushed herself up with great difficulty. It seemed each day made mundane tasks like getting out of bed harder and harder as the baby grew inside her.

When she pulled back the flap separating her from the main room, she saw Luke sitting with her mother by the small fire they kept in the centre for the kettle. Reha was pouring him a cup of tea as Serela tottered in, stifling a yawn and wondering to herself how long Luke had been here.

 ** _Only about an hour,_** she almost jumped when she heard his voice inside her head, and it made him smile in amusement. "Good morning," he greeted her softly, and started to rise from his seat on one of the floor cushions to offer it to her.

With a wave of her hand and a cluck of her tongue, Reha dismissed the kind gesture and went to retrieve another floor cushion for her daughter. Gratefully, Serela took the cushion and set it down next to her mother's across the table from Luke. He still made her feel wary with his presence, and she was afraid to think anything around him because she knew he could read every bit of it.

 ** _With time I can teach you how to resist showing me so much that is in your head_** _,_ he promised, and she stared at him across the small fire, her keen eyes trying to decipher what his motives were.

"I want you to come and train with me and my new padawan, Rey, during the day Serela. I understand with everything that has happened to you why you might be hesitant, but you growing stronger in the Force and learning to better harness your power can only be positive. Aside from myself and Rey, you are the only other person on this planet I know of with the power to be an asset to the First Order. It's time you allowed me to begin your training."

Grateful that he had forsook his favorite method of communicating with her in favor of one her mother could hear too, Serela contemplated his words carefully.

"Do you really think it's a good idea for her to begin strenuous training when she's this far along into her pregnancy?" Reha spoke up worriedly.

"I do. There will be other, more physical parts of the training that she will abstain from for the time being, and I will teach them to her later after the birth. Until that happens most of the training she will receive from me will be mental. She needs to learn how to shut people out of her thoughts, especially if the First Order is coming here to try and retrieve her. Ben-Kylo Ren, will be searching desperately for her when he gets here, and it is still much too early for her to have the baby, therefore it will be very difficult for her to move fast and escape him on foot if she must. I want to train Serela to be able to fight with her mind, to use the Force to combat Kylo Ren and his soldiers in whatever way she can in her present condition. It could mean the difference between life and death for her and her son."

Reha swallowed, "Doesn't sound like there's much of a choice in the matter."

"The damage to the hyperdrive on board the Finalizer was significant, but not enough to deter them much longer than a month. It's been 2 weeks already, which means they could be here anytime within another 2 weeks, or possibly even sooner."

Serela still had not answered either of them. She sat on her cushion, eyes closed in meditation, trying to listen for the voice of the Force to tell her what to do.

Luke and Reha waited for her to say something, and the tent was silent except for the noise of neighbours shuffling about and the tinkling of wind chimes outside. All this was lost on Serela, who had entered her special, secret place and sat there contentedly, waiting for the power inside her to guide her in the direction she should take.

 _Go,_ it said, _Go and learn from Luke what he will teach you. The First Order will be here soon, and you must be ready to face your child's father when they do._

Serela opened her eyes and saw her mother and Luke staring at her expectantly.

"When do we start?"

 _Author's Note: Holy crap I'm so sorry this took so long to get out. My old job made me work on Monday since my new job had the day off and I threw out my back picking up the kids I worked with (it was a daycare) so I've been in mega pain off and on until I went to sleep with a muscle relaxer for a few nights, now I'm all better :) plus my new job has decided after two days I'm fully trained so I'm just enjoying being out of my old place and getting settled in here._

 _This was a pretty short chapter considering how long the other ones were, but I will try very hard to post another one by tomorrow or at least this weekend. Thanks for all the people who continue to review and give me feedback. The next chapter will probably be from Serela's perspective again AND it will include interaction with the Trio, so hopefully you will not be disappointed!_


	32. XXXII The Lightkeepers

That afternoon Serela set out from camp in the direction of the base, her mother waving from the door flap of the tent as she watched her daughter leave, dabbing her eyes with an apron. It was the first time they'd been separated in the two weeks since Serela had been brought here.

Of course there was talk in the camp between the locals, but nowhere was there more talk than on the base amongst the Resistance. Rumours flew rapidly and everyone seemed to have an opinion on Serela's situation, and Leia's choice to get them involved in it. Most agreeing that there was nothing to be done for it now, but apprehensive of the repercussions that were sure to come from such an audacious move.

For her first training she had not expected to run into anyone save for Luke and possibly the girl he had mentioned. It was still early enough in the day that she expected all the Resistance staff would be busy running drills and the many other things she knew they must be doing to prepare for the First Order's arrival.

So when she cleared the last of the trees and began to head through the tall grass surrounding the back entrance to the base, the last person she expected to see was the dusky, olive-skinned man who had stayed after the council meeting to speak with Leia. Yet there he was in the middle of the grass, seated on a large rock with his back to her. Even without seeing his face she somehow knew that it was him, the orange jumpsuit reminding her that his position here was as a pilot. Immediately wary, she tried to think if she knew another way to go around without him seeing her, but the only ones she could think of were too far for her to walk in her pregnant state.

Hesitantly, she stepped forward on the worn path through the grass, trying not to make any noise as she did and hoping that somehow he might not notice her pass by him, or at the least ignore her. The soft afternoon breeze rustled through the green stalks and they bowed under its force. Her newly short hair caught in the wind and lightly grazed across her face as she kept closely to the path. Reaching up to tuck the strands back behind her ear, she was almost past him and knew he must see her when she heard his deep voice, "Hey!"

Serela stopped, but didn't turn, instead waiting to hear what he would say next.

"Hey!" he said again, and she heard the sound of his feet hitting the ground and shuffling over to her through the grass, "Are you heading towards the base?"

Finally she turned to face him and was surprised to see how close he was. For a man she was pretty sure did not want her to be here he was almost near enough for her to reach out and touch. He was an average height, not nearly so tall as Kylo had been, but still much taller than her, and upon closer inspection, had a face that seemed very good-natured. Brown eyes and a wide nose, with a set of brilliant white teeth flashing at her as he spoke, "Are you okay?"

"Yes!" she said a little too forcefully, and the baby gave a faint kick. "Yes, I'm fine," she assured him, feeling the baby roll over and resettle himself, "You just startled me is all."

"Sorry about that," he gave her a sheepish grin and raked his hand through his wavy hair. This was not what she had expected to receive from him in the way of welcomes.

"So are you?"

"Am I what?"

"Heading for the base?"

Embarrassed that she had been distracted when he first asked her the question, she nodded, "I'm supposed to be meeting with Luke and his 'pad-ah-wahn' to begin training," her lips enunciated every part of the word carefully.

He grinned at her as if stifling a laugh at the way she said it, "Well, I haven't seen you around here since the first night after you arrived. Do you know the way to the training area they use?"

"Oh, um..." she fumbled, trying to recall the directions Luke had given her when he'd left the tent earlier. "I know I'm supposed to use the back door, head down the hallway and then take a series of rights, but I'm afraid I forgot the rest," she admitted diffidently.

The man in front of her smiled again, and she felt a strange feeling in her stomach that had nothing to do with the baby, who she could tell by his inactivity was falling asleep now. This was odd to her. Of course she could see that others would undoubtedly find him attractive, but as soon as the thought crossed her mind, her heart reminded her what she already knew; that somehow in spite of everything, Kylo still occupied to much space inside her to entertain the idea of being attracted to anyone else right now. So she shrugged off the butterflies sensation as pregnancy hormones and listened to him as he asked her, "Do you want me to show you the way to the training area?"

She nodded absently, and noticed for the first time the scar he had on his right cheek, the same place as Kylo's. It was smaller of course, and much less noticeable, but the comparison brought her back even further to the sharp reality that she was carrying Kylo's baby, and it was him she felt butterflies with. No one else. Even if he never returned to her or the Light side, she told herself there would never be another man who stirred her heart the way he did. The finality to this realization strengthened her resolve and she felt less ill at ease speaking to the man now, but still determined to overcome her shy demeanor with him.

He started to head towards the base with her then paused, spinning around and saying, "I'm Poe, by the way, Poe Dameron. I don't think we were ever introduced."

Serela wanted to respond that she didn't think he was very interested in being introduced to her that night in the council room when he had looked at her so strangely, but instead she opted to politely reciprocate the gesture, "Nice to meet you Poe, my name is-"

"Serela," he finished for her, and again those perfect white teeth flashed at her in a smile, and she felt some of her wariness of him beginning to slip away, whether she meant for it to or not.

"C'mon," he waved his hand towards the base and turned to heed the path, leaving her to follow behind him as quickly as her burgeoning girth would allow.

When they reached the back part of the base, the gray concrete walls and rusty metal entrance waited for them. Poe opened the single door for her, laughing at her startled reaction when the screeching metal sounded like nails on a chalkboard. Stepping inside, the smell of mildew and cement wafted to her nose, erasing the pleasant lingering scent of the grass and flowers outside.

"Do you remember your way around this base at all?" he asked in a gentle tone.

Wracking her brain for any memory of which ways she had come and gone during the one day she spent in here, she finally sighed and admitted in defeat, "Not really."

"That's okay," Poe assured her, "It's a confusing layout, especially with all the endless hallways, but the base goes deep, even underground there are more levels, in order to help us hold out here as long as possible in the event of a land invasion. I'll show you around if you have time."

Serela thought about the offer, Luke had said to come by in the early afternoon, but he had never really given her a definite time. "Well..."

"If you're busy or don't want to it's okay," he told her, "Just thought it might help you to feel more welcome if you knew your way around here. I won't always be out in the field when you walk by to show you," he said with a wink.

Nonplussed, Serela wasn't sure what to say. Should she tell him 'yes' and be forced to spend more time with this man she wasn't sure liked her or approved of her presence here, or risk being rude and telling him to just take her to see Luke? In the end she decided she might as accept the offer, as this might be her only chance for awhile to find someone with the time to show her.

"Okay, so this hallway right here leads down to the barracks, and each of these doors opens to the chambers of one of the senior officials, Leia is down another hallway closer to the council chamber," he was pointing as they walked and talked, keeping a brisk pace she had to almost trot to keep up with.

"Down here is the way towards the front entrance and the landing pads outside, over this way to the medical bay," there were a few people they passed, some in uniforms, but everyone's face was visible. Not a helmet in sight, and she realised she was still expecting to wake up back on board the Finalizer, a patrol of stormtroopers around every corner. Poe was continuing to talk and point but she didn't hear most of it. The feelings of panic were beginning to take over, and she felt as if the ground were wobbling beneath her, leaving her feet unsteady. Her last memories before she fainted were Poe's concerned face mouthing the words Are-you-okay? before she put out her hands to the wall to catch herself as she fell.

In her unconsciousness, she had another vision. This time she was lying on a flat plain, surrounded on all sides by the pitch black night with no way to see anything until the first flash of lightning. Alarmed, she tried to stand up but found she couldn't. Her body was staked down to the ground by ropes and when she glanced around in terror she saw the lightning strike the ground only inches away. It continued to rain down in a blaze, and she looked up in terror to see it illuminating the silhouette of Kylo Ren standing above her, the angry red blade of his lightsaber glowing as he violently swung it upwards only to bring it back down on her."

Waking with a scream, Serela opened her eyes to see Poe and Luke standing over her, Poe's worried face bent close as his hands lightly shook her shoulders.

"Serela! Serela! It's okay, you're okay, you're still here. Nothing bad is happening to you! Wake up!"

Luke's stoic expression was unreadable, and she felt Poe's hands on her shoulders trying hastily to help her sit upright. Her whole body was still limp from the shock, and her skin felt clammy and cold.

"How long was I out?" she asked Poe, her eyes still drooping.

"Not that long. Luke sensed you were here and that something was wrong. He showed up a few minutes after you fainted."

The look on Luke's face told her he had witnessed her vision, and tentatively, she spoke over Poe's shoulder to make him confirm it, "You saw?"

Confused, Poe looked back and forth from her to Luke several times before asking, "Saw what?"

"Yes," Luke replied simply, "I did."

Poe was still waiting expectantly for someone to clarify for him what had happened, which Luke knew of course, but he was waiting to see if Serela would explain it.

"Er, I had a vision," she told him, and Poe's head snapped back to her, listening for her to continue, "A vision?" he asked, "Of what?"

"I'm not sure," she told him lamely, "I've started to have them just recently and I don't know if it's the future or the past, or what it is."

He was listening intently, his arms still holding her sitting upright until she realised this and made to stand on her own, uncomfortable with the prolonged contact.

"Poe, thank you for your attentions towards my student. I think you'll find that she is most appreciative you were here during her ordeal. However it's imperative that she and I begin training, so if you could help her to her feet, I think we should be off." Luke's voice bade no disagreement, and Poe lifted her to her feet, his arms surprisingly strong and muscular for his height.

"Well..." his voice trailed off as he regarded them both skeptically; he had not gotten all the answers he wanted and now he understood that he had missed his chance, "...I guess I'll leave you both to it."

Luke stood with his hands folded and Serela wobbled a little, but gave a small smile to them both. When Poe began to head back down the hallway he had brought her up here from, he turned back with a wave and another grin, picking up his pace and jogging down the hallway until they could no longer see him.

 ** _You know you don't need to worry that he dislikes you_** Luke's voice interrupted her thoughts, and she recoiled at the onslaught of his voice in her head without warning her.

 ** _You must get used to this Serela,_** he chided her, **_At times where physical speech is not possible, the Force enables us to still communicate. This is a gift to be treasured and practiced whenever possible, for it may well be what saves your life someday._**

 ** _It's very uncomfortable though_** she responded, **_Knowing that you're always in my head, seeing everything with no control on my part._**

 ** _I told you I would teach you to control this and I will. First you must be willing to accept that this will many times be our primary form of education, especially when it is the two of us. When others are present I don't want to seem rude, but even then there are certain merits to being able to speak privately with someone in the same room without the knowledge of the others._**

She understood, and he knew that she did.

 ** _Come_** _,_ he beckoned, crooking his finger at her, **_Your fellow padawan has agreed to meet us on the training grounds when she has finished her afternoon duties. We mustn't delay._**

Serela gingerly followed after after him, the pace he set being much easier to keep up with than Poe's. There were more hallways, and small flights of steps only 3-4 at a time, up and down, down and up. Finally she saw a single door straight ahead, it's luminous outline visible even from far away, seeming to suggest that on the other side was the sun and outdoors.

 ** _This way_** he guided her when they had reached it, and without touching it once the door opened. Outside again, the sunlight was so bright it nearly blinded her after just an hour underground in this bunker.

The door opened to a small patch of grass no larger than her cottage, surrounded everywhere by trees, trees and more trees. Though the day was beginning grow later, the sun still filtered down through the branches and warmed her. Serela's face broke into a smile at this familiar atmosphere, and Luke gave a faint one in return.

"Come sit with me," he spoke out loud, "I want to see something before we begin. Rey is not here yet, it is the perfect time."

Serela took a spot on the grass where a large strip of sunlight could beat down on her back, filling her with its rays and energy. She struggled to cross her legs beneath her stomach and after several minutes finally succeeded, watching with envy as Luke sat down nonchalantly across from her, retaining the same pose but with none of the difficulty.

 ** _Pregnancy is only for a short while Serela, though it may well feel like forever. Enjoy every part of it that you can, while you can._**

Guiltily, she looked down at the grass between them; Luke had only left a narrow strip of it, choosing to seat himself very close.

 ** _Take my hands_** he instructed, then sensing her hesitation, reassured her, **_Do not be afraid._**

Serela's fingers found their way into his own, and then she heard his voice in her head again, guiding her, **_Take deep breaths like your mother taught to do in meditation. Feel the Force around you, let it flow through you. I need to be able to see inside your heart to the place where it resides._**

Nervously, Serela closed her eyes. She immediately felt her heart begin to speed up and she tried to calm it, breathing deeply as he had instructed her and trying to delve back into that sacred place, calling out for the Force to unite with her.

It suddenly felt like a flash inside her, and she gripped Luke's hands in alarm, clutching them in the midst of this strange feeling. It had never been like this before! The sensation was intense and all-consuming, as if she was experiencing it for the first time and was overwhelmed with the effect of it.

She felt Luke's presence inside her, prying, combing, searching. She tried to guide him to the places she instinctively thought he would want to look, but he evaded her, choosing to see the things that she tried her best to hide from him. All the memories she wanted to keep hidden were of Kylo, and yet Luke seemed to pull them from her as easily as he might pluck the strings of a harp. Some memories he perused, others he lingered on, and still others, like her reminisces of Kylo's lovemaking, he thankfully deterred himself from. Her cheeks felt hot and she knew she was blushing, but there was no one around to see.

Carefully, he seemed to dive from place to place, looking for one thing in particular but she didn't know what it was. He seemed to be frustrated at not finding what he was looking for, until finally, when she could feel his resignation begin to set in, he saw it.

There, in the middle of the room of her heart, sat the candle. Curious as to why he would care so much to see it, when she knew Kylo had one too, she nonetheless held back from trying to deter him. It felt as though he was circling it, waiting for it to do something, and then just like that, a spark. The candle's flame began to emit a series of them, firing off rapidly one after the other, like a firework. Serela watched stunned, she had never seen anything like this before either. When the sparks abated and the flame still held, she thought it was all done when Luke's voice shushed her, and she came in closer to watch. The flame began to grow, larger and larger until it was so large it felt like it would burn her if she touched it. When she reached out her hand to try though, it did not burn, rather it seemed to respond to her much like a pet to his master. Flowing over the palm of her hand like waves and spilling out from her fingertips. Without even thinking about it she formed the flames into small spheres and hoisted them up, watching as their fiery orbs floated around her. Fascinated at this new experience, she glanced over to Luke excitedly to see his response.

His serious expression ceased her reverie and suddenly she opened her eyes. They were still in the same patch of grass, but the sun seemed to have gone down significantly since they had started, and as if sensing this, her stomach growled suggestively, indicating that it would soon be time for dinner. The baby was awake too, perhaps also fascinated by the things she had just seen, and it felt like he was dancing inside of her.

"He senses it too," Luke whispered in awe, staring at her belly.

"Senses what?" she inquired, the implications of what she had just experienced were lost on her.

 ** _Serela, let me see your shoulder please._**

Immediately reminded of the time Kylo had asked her for the same thing, Serela narrowed her eyes at him, **_Why?_**

 ** _Because I need one last thing as confirmation of what I've just seen._**

Reluctant but still willing she slid down the strap of her new dress, twisting her back and hunching her shoulder forward so he could see what she presumed he was looking for.

The crescent moon birthmark stared back at him and he exhaled forcefully, sucking in new breath with a hiss.

"It's better than I'd hoped for," he exclaimed softly.

Just then, the other two she remembered seeing from the council, the ones who had stood in the corner with Poe came dashing out of the door laughing, the dark man chasing the small girl. They stopped in their tracks when they saw Luke and Serela sitting stoic on the ground, Serela's shirt pulled down and looking very peculiar.

Hastily she moved to cover her shoulder again and Luke greeted them, "Welcome, Finn and Rey. I was wondering when you would get here. The hour has already grown very late."

"I'm sorry Master," the girl Rey said, hurrying to come closer and seat herself, leaving Finn alone by the door, "We got distracted and lost track of the time."

Luke stared into her eyes with such a serious expression that Serela knew he could only be speaking to her through the mind as he did with her.

"Finn," he addressed the man abruptly, "You may leave us now. We will meet up with you for dinner."

Finn's eyes darted from Luke to Serela to Rey, then receiving no response, seemed to give up, accepting that this was one instance where he could not be included. Serela felt his frustration without even meaning to delve into his head and shook herself, _why was she suddenly seeing people's thoughts withing meaning to?_

 ** _Because your powers are growing stronger just by being here._** Luke's eyes were closed, his finger to Rey's temple, imparting something that Serela was still unaware of. So how was he able to talk to her and do that at the same time?

 ** _Practice,_** she heard, and saw him smile, his eyes still closed.

When the process with Rey was over, her head turned towards Serela quickly, looking her over as if she was seeing an entirely different person.

"So what does it mean?" she asked Luke.

"She is a Lightkeeper," Luke breathed, the portentous affect of his words finding no recognition.

"I suspected it almost from the moment your mother's message reached us, but I barely dared to hope that it was true. She spoke of a daughter so filled with Light that she had somehow seduced the infamous Kylo Ren, to the point that he paid you _multiple_ visits instead of tiring of you or simply taking you by force to be with in itself was suspicious, but then she spoke of your upbringing, your strong connection to the Force almost from birth, your abilities that manifested themselves in powerful ways sometimes, lifting heavy objects with your mind even with no practice in doing so. I remembered much from the vision I received with my nephew so many years ago, but the birthmark on your shoulder I somehow missed, or I would have known it then."

"But what is a Lightkeeper?" Rey inquired, shifting her gaze from Luke to Serela, then back to Luke.

"Lightkeepers were-ARE very rare," he explained, "In the days of the old Jedi temples Lightkeepers would be identified at an early age and trained much the same as Jedi, but their powers were stronger and different in a myriad of ways. There was always one way to identify them, for those who knew where and what to look for. A small birthmark on their shoulder, in the shape of a crescent moon. This was the defining symbol even from birth, though Lightkeepers born on distant planets frequently were not identified until they were much older, if ever at all. With Anakin Skywalker's destruction of the Jedi, the Lightkeepers were destroyed too, though they were never as prolific in number."

"Is it hereditary?" Serela asked, trying to recall anything her mother had told her about their family history to indicate where this had come from.

"No," Luke squashed her train of thought right there, "Generally speaking there are only 1-2 Lightkeepers born per million, which made finding and training them even when it was universally acceptable to do so very difficult, but next to impossible in this present environment."

Serela sat stunned, trying to process all of this, "So...what does this mean?"

"It means that a part of the Light still lives inside of Kylo Ren, a part that you drew out of him without him even realising it. It means that the more he was around you the stronger it became. Snoke sensed this and likely would have ordered you killed if not for the news of your baby. The temptation of a child born with such extraordinary powers was too good for him to pass up, and so he forced Kylo's hand, bringing you aboard the Finalizer and separating the two of you until he could be sure Kylo's allegiance was secure."

Her head was spinning, so many questions answered, only to be replaced by 100 more.

"But his reconditioning was successful. I barely recognised him aside from physical appearance. His tone and disposition; all of it had changed."

"The First Order's reconditioning is likely a strenuous process, akin to brainwashing in many ways. I would ask Finn what it is like but he escaped the Finalizer before he had the chance to find out. A fact which has led all of us hear to this exact spot today. Thankfully, I might add."

Rey was nodding and Serela pursed her lips together, deep in thought while the now rapidly setting sun was beginning to cast dark shadows over their vigil.

Just as Luke was about to usher them inside, Serela spoke, "What can I do?" she begged him frantically, "How can I save him? Bring him back for good? What use is there in being a 'Lightkeeper' if I have to stand by and watch him succumb to the First Order?"

Rey spoke to her for the first time, answering instead of Luke, "What use is there in any of us who possess the Force to fight against the Dark, Serela? Nothing we try and do is ever a guarantee, we must simply continue to try, and maintain hope that our efforts will work."

Her words had not been unkind, but they struck Serela in the heart, piercing her in the spot that Kylo had created months ago. Every day since her escape it had begun to scab over, not much, but enough to help her function. However, sitting here now listening and talking about him and the lengths the First Order had gone through to retain him she felt the hopelessness of her situation so much more poignantly.

Tears came to her eyes and she was thankful for the darkness, hoping it shielded her stricken face enough that they didn't notice.

With Rey's admonition complete, Luke stood, waiting for the girls to follow suit. Rey was up in an instant, but Serela struggled to even hoist herself enough to maneuver her feet out of the cross-legged position. Bending down, Rey offered her both hands and helped her rise to her feet.

"Thank you," Serela whimpered, and Rey squeezed her arm with a smile, perhaps sensing that Serela didn't want a fuss made over her emotions at this time, but she still needed to know she had a friend if she wanted one. Luke led the way inside, both girls following his stride.

As the three of them walked down the hallways in search of the cafeteria, Serela thought of something else and decided to practice her Force-speak as Luke kept encouraging her to do.

 ** _What makes you think my son is the Chosen one?_** she asked him skeptically, watching how his steps slowed just enough that she noticed but Rey continued on next to them, unawares.

 ** _I've spent much time alone these years with nothing but the Force for company. We are so close now we're practically one in the same. It was the Force that led me to believe the Chosen One was still to come, and when word reached me of the child growing inside of you I knew it to be true. I knew it to be him._**

 ** _He will be a baby! Even if he does have special powers far superior to any of us, it will take years for them to manifest! Years!_**

 ** _Yes, and it is still as I said to the council: who he is raised by during those formative years will make all the difference in bringing balance to the Force. Whether he is raised by Darkness or the Light is imperative. We cannot allow him to be captured by the First Order, for if he were to be raised by Snoke and his accomplices, there is no telling what wrath he might be able to unleash when your son comes of age and into the fullness of his powers._**

Serela frowned, upset with the implication that her son could be raised to be so dark.

 ** _It would be almost impossible for him to resist it Serela, if that's how he was raised. You were raised in the Light, which helped the manifestation of your powers so much. If you hadn't you might never have been able to bring out that side of my nephew. That's why it is so important that you learn to harness your powers, so you can protect your son and keep him away from it._**

 ** _And bring back Kylo..._** she added, but they had just reached the cafeteria and she received no response.

It was a surprisingly large space, with long lines of Resistance members in their uniforms, fresh from duty running drills and the other various precautions being made in preparation for the First Order invasion.

Serela realised she was absolutely famished and had just joined the line behind Rey and Luke when she saw Finn and Poe approaching, both of them all smiles.

"Hey," Poe greeted them first, and came to stand next her while Finn greeted Rey and shuffled in behind her, whispering a joke in her ear. Serela heard her laugh and felt another twinge in her heart, would she and Kylo ever be able to share a joke or laugh together again? Luke hadn't answered her either of the times when she talked of bringing him back to the Light. Did he believe that his nephew was a lost cause?

"So how'd it go?" Poe was asking her, and she looked over at him, remembering Luke's words about Poe, _You know you don't need to worry that he dislikes you._

"Good," she answered truthfully, not sure how much she should really relay to him and deciding to change the subject, "How was the rest of your day?"

He ran his fingers through his hair again and smiled, "Good! Finished drills this morning and took the early shift with training the new pilots. Most of them are still pretty green behind the ears but we should have them in decent shape before the First Order gets here."

"You're one of the top pilots then?" she asked, feeling stupid because she was already sure of the answer.

"Yeah," he chuckled, "I was actually one of the pilots who flew with your rescue mission."

It dawned on her suddenly, that this was the man she'd heard them speak of. "You said your name was Dameron?" He nodded. "Then you were the one leading the pilots in the distraction while Quin and the other one found me... you damaged the hyper drive to slow down the First Order from catching up to us!"

"Guilty as charged," his tone downplayed the heroics of his actions, "Just doing my job." Another warm smile.

"Wow," she felt almost dizzy, and her first thought was that she hoped she wouldn't pass out again, especially not here in front of all these people. "Thank you," she managed to say, looking ahead and trying to focus her eyes, the baby kicking directly against her stomach, or was that just hunger?

"You okay? You seem a little woozy."

Luke turned around to look at her after hearing this, taking in her pallor and shaking hands. "Serela, this line is too long for someone in your condition to wait in, especially since you have not eaten for hours. Poe, go and find her a seat and sit with her, we will bring the food to you."

Serela felt his gentle, calloused fingers on her elbow and forearm, steering her out of the line and towards one of the 30 or so waiting tables. Many were already full so they chose a spot closer to the back where there were still clusters of empty seats together, claiming a table that was still entirely empty. Poe helped her to sit down and took the space next to her, watching her with concerned eyes.

"How long has it been since you ate?"

"I'm not sure. I had breakfast with my mother and a small snack at lunch, but I was anxious about coming here so I wasn't very hungry. I guess I didn't eat as much as I thought."

"Maybe that's also why you passed out earlier?"

"No," she shook her head emphatically, "I don't think so."

Silenced by her pronouncement, Poe glanced back over at the line, noting the progress the remaining three had made.

"How are you feeling now?" he ventured to ask, and she groaned, "I'm fine. Really. I just need to eat and after that I'll be able to walk home." She jolted in her seat as the baby gave a hard kick to her ribs.

"What is it? What's wrong?" he asked her worriedly, and she laughed at his concern.

"I'm FINE," she insisted, taking his worried face into account and softening her tone, "It's just the baby kicking."

Poe's eyes widened and he looked at her belly as if expecting the baby to pop out at any moment. "How often does he do that?"

Serela laughed, "Pretty much all the time when he is awake, he's very mobile."

Mollified, Poe relaxed his shoulders and resumed his congenial mood. "Have you decided what to name him yet?"

She shook her head, "I-we were going to name him Han... but that was before I knew-"

Finn dropped the tray with two plates down in front of them with a loud clatter, causing Serela to jump in her seat. "Sorry," he apologised, and Rey gave him a stern look, setting her own tray down next to his with much quieter fanfare, passing a plate of food across the table to Serela, while Finn handed Poe his. Luke seated himself at the head of the table where he could see all of them, and Serela looked down at her plate, grateful that it looked like a good meal.

There was meat with gravy, as well as vegetables and some sweet type of bread she guessed was cake, they all tucked in hungrily and conversation ceased for a few minutes as they began to eat, the only sound was the dull roar of voices surrounding them.

When his plate was clean, Luke made to stand and took his tray in hand, "I must go," he told Serela directly, "There are things I must speak with Leia about. I trust your new friends to see you safely home."

Flustered at the thought of him thrusting her onto them like a small child, she barely managed to retort that she was old enough to walk home by herself before he had strode off, leaving her there like a lost puppy. She turned back to her food after she saw the last of his robe disappear behind one of the cafeteria doors. Dimly she searched for his subconscious and found it, although he said nothing to her, but she felt him smile at her irritation.

Annoyed at how he had left things she turned to the trio and assured them, "You really don't need to worry about me getting home, I'm perfectly capable of finding my way alone in the dark."

Rey spoke first, her tone incredulous, "Um, with the entire First Order looking for you and due to arrive here at any time? I think not Serela. We're taking you back, all of us, as a group."

Finn and Poe nodded at her assertion and Serela rubbed her stomach, trying to keep the blush from her face. She didn't want to feel like anybody's burden, and when she caught Rey looking at her with eyes focused, she knew Rey could see that in her mind.

When they were all finished, or rather, when the men had completed their second and third helpings and finally couldn't hold anymore, the four of them rose from their seats in unison, Finn taking Rey's tray and empty plate while Poe took Serela's.

The girls waited for Finn and Poe by the doors, Rey giving Serela a friendly smile as she stared after Finn, watching his every move until the two of them returned.

"Miss us?" Poe joked, "Always," Rey replied, but her eyes never once glanced at Poe. Finn smiled at her and held open the door, allowing all three to pass through before he followed.

Once outside the air was chilly, and Serela felt herself shiver, wishing she had one of her scarves from home to wrap around her shoulders. Poe must have sensed this, and he shucked his jacket off his shoulders unexpectedly and draped it over Serela's.

"Sorry, you looked cold," he stated, the same good-natured grin from earlier shone back at her, but this time thanks to Luke's words she could believe that it was genuine, and she expressed her gratitude to him for the gesture.

Moving along down the path through the grass again, she kept her eyes on Rey and Finn up ahead, both talking low and teasingly, with an occasional playful shove from Rey against Finn's shoulder.

"So are they together?" Serela asked Poe conversationally, trying to fill the silence.

"More or less," he chuckled, "Depends on the day and which one you ask. Rey's training to be a Jedi and part of the Jedi Code is not to have romantic entanglements, but it's pretty hard to fight biology."

Serela smiled at that, "Yes," she agreed, "It certainly is."

They walked the rest of the way mostly in silence, Poe once cautioning her to tread carefully when they reached the trees for fear she might trip in the dark. Finn and Rey carried on a few steps ahead, oblivious.

As they came upon the mass encampment, Serela enjoyed their gaping expressions of fascination when they saw the colorful assortment of tents; people and animals walking to and fro in quiet respect for the darkening hour. People yawned as they passed by and the faint wail of babies and small children fighting their bedtime joined with the chirping of birds overhead settling in for the night and the tinkling of the windchimes on every tree.

"Wow..." Finn managed to say, as he and his two friends stood enraptured, while Serela watched on in amusement.

"My tent is this way," she motioned to the left and led the way,their path now clearly lit by the torches stuck every few feet along the pathway through the camp.

Finn and Rey remained behind, but Poe followed, walking with her all the way down the path to the flap of her tent, where Serela peeped inside and saw Reha seated on one of the cushions, stirring her bedtime tea with a spoon. Not wanting to go through the awkwardness of introductions, she quietly bade Poe goodnight, thanking him for acting as her guard and moving to enter the tent.

"Wait!" he called, and she stopped before pulling back the flap, hoping her mother hadn't overhead him, although she wasn't sure why.

"Look, er, I just wanted you to know... the whole Resistance is on your side here," he began to speak quickly, trying to get everything out before he forgot it, "We know you're going through a lot, sooo I guess what I wanted to say is just, don't shut us out, you know, or think that we're all against you here. There might be a handful who don't agree, but the rest of us are on your side. We trust the general, and we're going to protect you and your baby the best we can."

Serela listened with a detached air about her, afraid that he might say something negative, but he never did. When he was done she lifted her hand to his own and squeezed it, "Thank you," she said, and then she was gone inside the tent, not waiting for a response.

Bewildered by her rash departure, Poe stood there for a moment before he turned and followed the path back to where he'd left Finn and Rey, both still taking in the surroundings with enthralled stares. They followed after him back towards the base, but still lagging behind him as if they were one entity and he another.

Meanwhile Serela had entered the tent with a sigh, and greeting her mother, immediately made for her partition in the tent, declining her offer of tea. After a day like today, she knew she would have no trouble falling asleep. Indeed, when she crawled into her tent space and collapsed with a huff on her bedroll, she was out cold within minutes, her mind turning off as she slipped into unconscious dreams.

 _Author's Note: OKAY, so again with the longest chapter thus far. Hopefully you can tell why it took another two days to finish. My new job is freaking amazing and I literally sit at a computer all day and answer like, 10 phone calls the whole 8 hours I'm there. Seriously, I'm living every writer's dream right now. I would give my own feedback for the direction I'm taking it, but I'd rather hear yours. How do you feel about the character development this chapter. Is anyone getting on your nerves? Is there something you thing I could be doing more of. Again, I spend a TON of time writing and rewriting and proofreading this stuff, so I've tried very hard to polish it as much as possible before posting. Feel free though to point out any grammatical errors or maybe words that you feel I overuse. Still blown away by the 17,000 views but you guys have proved you're amazing readers. Thanks again for all the feedback and support!_


	33. XXXIII The Dream

The sounds of her moans and small gasps filled Kylo's ears as he paused in his ministrations below. Using his tongue in ways he had always wanted to but never gotten the chance before, he teased and tortured her with it in unseemly ways as she arched her back off the bed in his sparse room aboard the Finalizer.

His large hands cupped her buttocks and lifted her sex as his tongue delved inside of her, eliciting screams of ecstasy as he felt finally her walls contract with the sensation. Fingers roamed up to her burgeoning belly and rubbed the proof of his claim on her, his child, _their_ child; her body twitching with the aftereffects of her climax.

Whimpering as she came down from her spectacular high, Serela covered her face with her hand as she felt him shift upwards and behind her, gathering her body into his arms and pressing his chest against her back as he took her from behind. Panting with the effort she gripped his hand which had snaked underneath her shoulder to palm her breast, his other one gripping her hip as he guided her body in time with his thrusts.

Kylo's mouth against her ear groaning his desire for her and the feeling of his legs in tandem with hers was so mesmerising, but it wasn't until his hand left her hip and traveled below where his mouth had been moments before to help her come with him that she felt the beginnings of a second climax building. He waited for her, coaxing her body as only he knew how to do and finally bringing her to another screaming finish, moaning his own release and spilling his seed into her already fertilised womb as she cried out his name again and again. The feel of his kisses lingered on her neck long after his lips had left them and her stomach fluttered wildly as the baby kicked, unaware of his parents activities.

"I love you," she whispered, guiding his hand to her stomach, rubbing the smooth taut skin with soft caresses.

Kylo woke with a start before he had the time to answer. His body was slick with sweat and his hair damp with it, the sheets soaked in evidence to the austerity of his dream.

He sat up in bed and turned on the lamp on the small table next to him, trying to catch his breath after the intense genuineness of such a dream. It had felt _SO_ real, he had believed she was here at last, in his arms and in his bed, finally succumbing to his wardship and attentions in every possible way. The skin on his back was soaked and he swung back to punch a pillow in sexual frustration, pulling it onto his lap and ripping it in two, the ivory feathers flying into the air and floating down softly to land on every surface they could find. Glaring at the wall as his body became coated in the white tufts that stuck to his sweaty skin, Kylo swung his legs out of the bed and made for the shower, turning the water on as cold as he dared before stepping in.

Rivers of white plumes ran off his back and floated their way to the waiting drain while he leaned against the wall of the shower, letting the frigid water cool his body and his mind. His desire for her was so intense after so long apart, so all-encompassing. He knew that he had to have her again, there must be a way to convince her to come with him willingly, without resulting in her blood and dismemberment to remove the child from her. Everyone had a weak spot, he just needed to figure out what hers was.

When he finally turned off the water and wrapped himself in a towel, he reentered the bedroom and immediately stripped the sheets from the bed, lying down on the bare mattress in nothing but the towel. Kylo stared up at the ceiling and began racking his brain as he had been for the past three weeks, searching endlessly for a way to guarantee her compliance when they finally reached D'Qar in one week and he came to retrieve her.

Flashes of his dream surged through him and his body tensed again with the frustration. Groaning, he rolled over and turned off the light, encasing himself in darkness as he waited for sleep to claim him again, his last thoughts of the feel of her walls fluttering around him when he made her come a second time.

The next day he had risen irritably, his neck and shoulders stiff with his restless sleep. He tried to put the memory of the dream from his mind as he dressed, but he knew tonight's hallucinations would be much the same; indeed, he'd been dreaming of almost nothing else for the past two weeks. Once his head had accepted that her physically presence was really, truly absent from the ship, his heart had plagued him with fantasies of differing variety every night, reminding him of what had been and could one day be again.

After he strapped his lightsaber into the holster at his hip, he thought better of it and pulled it out, releasing the flare of the blade and turning to gouge a huge slash into his wall, severing one of the bathroom pipes which split open with a hiss, the sound of spraying water gushing through places it should not be.

Kylo marched down the hallway furiously, looking for anyone or anything that would give him cause to rend them from head to toe. When he saw a group of three stormtroopers on patrol he barked at them, "You three! Go to my chambers immediately and see to it that the pipe in my wall is repaired before the end of the day," his mask tilted menacingly as he finished, "Or I will need more than water to be cleaned up from my floors tonight."

Hurrying to comply with his request, the three cantered off in the direction of his chambers, and he swung around, sensing the presence of the one person he wanted least to see and most to kill.

"Morning Ren, sleep well?"

"Will sleep much better the day Snoke allows me to cut you into pieces," Kylo snapped at Hux, brushing past him on his way to the control center.

"Tsk tsk, we really need to find a way for us to move past former indiscretions. I've done things you found reprehensible, like torturing your little whore, and you've done things I've found reprehensible, like taking her to your bed in the first place."

Kylo swiveled to face him and with no prior warning Hux found himself with the red blade of the lightsaber close to his throat.

"Give me a reason to do it. I swear," Kylo threatened, and Hux seemed to think better of his mutterings.

"Careful Ren, one might almost think your concern for finding the girl outweighs your commitment to the First Order."

"Don't speak to me about allegiance snake, I have already given up everything for our cause!"

"Not yet," Hux reminded him cooly, "There is still the matter of her... and your son."

Kylo stopped moving, indeed, everything around him seemed to still in the moment when he stared through the eye holes of his mask at Hux's repulsive sneer.

"What did you just say?"

"You know as well as I do Ren that the battlefield can turn much bloodier than previously thought with no warning. If she were to evade capture and it was a choice between letting her escape and killing both her and the babe... well, I'm sure Snoke would forgive me for making an executive decision. He would not, however, forgive you for letting it come to that, nor for killing me now as much as you want to. "

The red blade inched a little closer to Hux's neck as Ren contemplated (not for the last time) slicing him open and leaving him to bleed out on this cold metal floor for all to see.

Hux winced in pain when the blade came close enough to singe his neck hair, and with a grim smile no one else could see, Kylo retracted the blade and holstered the weapon, "I can't wait until the day I kill you," he promised.

Hux stared back at him with an unrelenting glare, "And I can't wait until I destroy the last two things preventing your full commitment to the Dark side," he seethed.

Kylo stepped forward until his mask was almost touching Hux's nose, "If you ever touch either of them again it will be to your peril."

"In one week we shall see, won't we?"

 _Author's Note: Okay, so I've been getting almost NO feedback from people (Thank you to the 3 who DID give me some on the longest chapter ever.) I was getting pretty discouraged over the weekend because I realised when I don't get much feedback either good or bad I just assume what I'm writing is bad and people are not interested, so I thought I'd throw everyone for a loop and include some smut for the first time in almost 20 chapters. Don't lie, some of you are only coming back to this to see more of it ;) I already know._

 _Basically, and I'm not saying this as a threat, more like a statement of fact, I think I'm going to start updating a little less frequently, to see if that induces more people to generate feedback. I'm not trying to be a whore for reviews, because really even a "U SUCK" would at least be an acknowledgment of the hours I spend writing this. I'm so grateful for the few people who do leave commentary and I'm going to continue writing, I'm just honestly pretty discouraged that my stats tell me a chapter gets read 200+ times and I only have three people who can bother to tell me if it blows chunks or not._

 _Would that be a better option for people anyway? If I just consistently released something new on say, every Saturday or something? That way it's not this 'will she, won't she?' and there would be a specific day to expect an update on?_


	34. XXXIV The Tree

Serela tossed and turned on her bedroll, the lasciviousness of her dreams causing her to thrash and moan softly. Her hands gripped the blankets covering her as her knuckles whitened with the effort of holding on. Back arching, she sucked in a breath and was on the verge of something familiar when her eyes opened and she exhaled sharply in disappointment.

Her dreams had been salacious lately and she felt too uncomfortable to ask her mother if this was a common trait for pregnancy, instead waking up frustrated and alone, wishing for a way to make them cease. She had wondered to herself in a moment of desperation if Luke would know how to stop them before telling herself she would die with the shame of it and resigning to an indefinite period of enduring them.

There was still about a week left before the First Order was due to arrive. Training efforts had been stepped up and Finn and Poe were busy almost from dawn until dinnertime, leaving Serela and Rey most of the day to train with Luke. He had been true to his word; Serela took part in none of the physical aspects of training, instead watching from an old tree stump as he took Rey through the motions and form of lightsaber training. Serela had only been coming onto the base for a week now but she had been making great strides in her own training with Luke. It had taken a few days but she had become better at shutting off her mind from openly broadcasting what she was thinking to any perceptive Force-user near enough to hear it.

Now he was concentrating on teaching her to reach out through the Force as well, using Force-speak over increasingly further distances. They had started small, he left her in one room and went to another, and after she had communicated with him with ease, he began to walk down the hallway, testing her until she could no longer hear him in her thoughts.

From there it become a challenge to her, she would attempt to communicate with him at all times and odd hours, testing herself and her abilities. Sometimes across the table at meals, sometimes on her walks home, once she had even done it in the evening before she settled in for the night, surprising Luke greatly. He had been impressed with her progress, all in the span of a week, but told her that was not an uncommon trait for Lightkeepers; they were unnaturally fast learners.

Chuffed at the compliment nonetheless, Serela continued to practice, spending most of her free time with her mother or Rey. The two became fast friends, in spite of Rey's pessimistic views on the chances of Kylo's redemption. Both girls had known solitude, although Rey had seen a much grimmer version of it on Jakku. She told Serela of her earliest memories of her family, as well as the day she was torn away from them, watching a ship speed off into the unknown and leaving her behind.

Serela teased Rey about the obvious infatuation between her and Finn. Rey blushed under the observation, trying to brush it off as nothing, but fooling no one. Many times Rey would walk back with her to the encampment where she would followed Serela down the path to the tent, and each time Rey's eyes would stare every which way trying to take it all in. Sometimes, when Finn was off duty for an hour or so, he would walk with them, and Serela would make sure to lag behind them both to give them alone time. It was easy, in those last few days of freedom, to forget about the imminent danger, even if just in small moments seated around the kettle in their tent, or meditating with Rey and Luke in that small grass enclosure, shaded by the great hulking trees.

One morning they held another council meeting, and this time Serela stood next to Rey and the other two, enthralled with the feeling of inclusion into this group which, up until last week, she had thought she had no business or chance in being a part of.

Most of the meeting passed by in a blur. It was meant more as a synopsis of how preparations had come, and what measures still needed to be taken to ensure the safety and survival of as many civilians as possible.

"The First Order knows we're on D'Qar, but they don't know where exactly. There are essentially two options for us in this situation, we can either sit here and wait for them to find us, or we can take the fight to them and try to give ourselves more time until they do," Snap Wexley was giving the speech, gesticulating wildly with his hands as he explained their predicament. "If we try to draw them towards the other side of the planet then that buys us time. We can continue to reinforce and we already know they're going to use ground troops because they won't want to risk killing the wrong person. When it does come down to fighting on land it's going to be dog-eat-dog, but the more we can prolong it, the better for all of us."

"What do you propose then?" Admiral Statura and Leia were only asking on pretense, this meeting had been called because they had already discussed and decided on their course of action, but they were trying to be diplomatic in how they presented it.

"We'll keep them busy elsewhere on D'Qar. Send out scouts, X-wings and the like to more remote areas where the First Order can waste their time hunting for us. Meanwhile back here we batten down the hatches, restrict movement outside to only at nighttime and tell the locals they can either flee to the hills and their kin or stay with us underground on the base. We can't take responsibility for anyone else on the planet except for those in our immediate vicinity. Hopefully we'll be able to hold the First Order's attention through aerial tactics for a month or so, at least until Serela gives birth. Then we can discuss evacuating her to another planet, or..." he paused, "Hopefully while we're buying more time someone will come up with a better plan for how to get rid of them."

A heavy silence fell on the room, and Serela avoided eye contact with anyone except Rey, who caught her attention with a squeeze of the shoulder and reassuring smile.

After being dismissed, Serela almost bolted for the door, wanting time and space away from everyone, even Rey and Luke. The serenity of the past few days was gone, the threat was very real now and it was almost here. Desperate for fresh air, she hurried down the hallways toward the back door of the base, almost clawing at the handle in her frantic bid to open it.

Outside the sun was beaming, completely throwing off her dark sense of dread. Indeed, it seemed the more she tried to worry about the disaster coming, the brighter it shone, as if trying to ward off the foreboding feeling in her chest.

Serela made her way home aimlessly, trudging through the soft earth and the trees with all the usual gracefulness of a woman in her 7th month of pregnancy. When she arrived back at the tent her mother was out, and a neighbor told her one of the girls a few tents down had gone into labour and they asked Reha for her help.

Glad for the chance at some privacy, Serela slipped inside. She found some leftover jerky and cheese to nibble on for lunch then felt her whole body freeze as she let out a massive yawn. The baby had been mellow this morning, perhaps resting himself up for all that was to come, and she could almost swear she heard him yawn inside of her too, his body straining against the confines of her belly, contorting it into erratic waves.

Smiling, she whispered to him, "I think a nap is a good idea for both of us," and headed for her bedroll in the small partition she had to herself. Lying down was harder every day, but nothing compared to getting up. Leia had made the suggestion of Serela moving into the base weeks ago when it became apparent that sleeping on the ground could not be a viable solution much longer, but Serela had stubbornly brushed it off, promising to let her know if she changed her mind. Of course with the looming arrival of the Finalizer Leia had made it clear in no uncertain terms that Serela would not have a choice of residing outside the base once the danger was here. Reha had surprisingly agreed with Leia, and had been packing their meagre belongings in a large sack for the time when it became apparent they needed to flee.

Another yawn rolled out of her and Serela rested comfortably against the pillows, her expanding girth sinking into the bedroll as she pulled the blanket over herself.

"Go to sleep little one," she reproached the baby when she felt him give a weak succession of kicks, trying his best to fight the impending nap. Eventually they both gave in, drifting into a peaceful slumber.

It was hours before Serela woke again, and when she did her head was groggy with the effect of too much rest. Hoisting her body up to sit, she felt dizzy and waited for it to pass. Once it did she called for her mother to come help her, but remembered where Reha was upon receiving no answer. Annoyed at her predicament, Serela tried to lurch forward, hoping to avoid the embarrassing process of rolling onto her knees and trying to push herself up. Unfortunately that seemed to be the only thing that worked for her anymore, and Serela rolled over in a huff as she struggled to make her way out of the small section she occupied.

Grappling her way into the main room of the tent, she stood up fully and twisted her body. When she bent her back to stretch, she could feel the loosening of her sore muscles and hear the nauseating pop of her neck that came from sleeping on it wrong. Ouch. Leia was right, it was about time she moved into the base and slept on a real bed. When Reha got back later, she would ask her if they could move their things in tonight.

First though, she felt the compulsion to go for a walk. It was strange how suddenly the urge possessed her, especially after such a long nap. Most days she was exhausted just from making the journey to the base and back, but she reminded herself that those days she also spent working with Luke and Rey, which required a considerable amount of energy too. She chalked up her mind's abrupt desire to go for a walk as just her body wanting exercise after lying around for most of the day, and she emerged from the tent to see the sun on the other side of the trees from where it was this morning. It was still the afternoon, but in a few hours time she knew it would begin to set.

Serela made her way through the camp and took a familiar path through the oft-traveled brush, careful to avoid the thorny bushes that blocked part of her route. Along the trail she began to feel her soul lighten. Closing her eyes, she listened for the still, small voice inside her, which seemed to be trying to lead her away from the projected route. When her eyes opened she saw in front of her a line golden light, curving around various obstacles in the road as it led away from the path and into the thick shrubs to the left of her course.

Curious, she followed it.

She tried hard to avoid every wayward branch and overgrown root as she followed the mysterious light to its unknown destination. Craning her head upward she hoped to see the sun through the tree tops but found that she had wandered to an area of the woodland where the their monstrously-sized trunks and their interwoven branches grew too thick together for her to see through them. The forest began to grow darker and quieter, almost unnerving her. Just when she was about to turn back though, Serela saw a bright patch up ahead and made to follow it, allowing the light to guide her further on.

As she cleared the dark part of the woods, she stepped into a lustrously sunlit glen, and beyond, she could see the golden light shimmering in a silent invitation to keep following through the last rows of trees, their dappled leaves enticing her onward as she heard a nudge inside her saying, _Only a bit further now._

Not put off, Serela made to pursue this to the end, seeing how the gold string seemed to lead beyond her sight to a destination so bright she had to wince and shield her eyes. Hurrying to finish before she lost heart, Serela increased her pace, weary feet plodding the seldom used path until finally she reached the end of the string and saw the truly dazzling scene of gold at the end of it.

She found herself standing on the edge of a field of wheat, and stretched out her arms to greet the sun here at the end of her quest. Every square inch of the field flashed against the spires of wheat, their tips caught in the glare of the sun and giving off a golden sheen. Serela stepped out into the field, her hands gently caressing the tops, allowing them to glide off her palms as she passed. Here even though the sun was beginning to wane just slightly, it felt like anything was possible, as though the planet itself were lending itself to their cause and victory.

 _Is this what I was brought here to see?_ she thought, looking around as the undulating waves of grain bowed under a low breeze sweeping in from the East.

Her reverie was interrupted all too soon.

"Hey," she heard a familiar voice behind her, "What're you doing out here?"

Serela looked over her shoulder to see Poe behind her, walking carefully, his feet lifting up to his knees with every step in an attempt not to break the stalks.

They had seen each other a handful of times since the first day he had shown her around and Serela felt content that he did not dislike her, but also that she did not like him beyond the bounds of friends either. There was so much going through her mind on a daily basis that she could not make sense of, and she worried that to throw anything else on the pile might cause her head to explode.

Still, it was nice to see a friendly face coming towards her and she smiled over her shoulder at him, squinting her eyes against the sun.

Poe's answering grin made her stomach flutter again but she pushed it away as she did every time now, reminding herself that she was pregnant and thus nothing her body did could be trusted.

"How's your day been?" he asked conversationally, planting both feet next to hers as he surveyed the golden landscape.

"Good," she offered, avoiding his eyes, "Just found this place on my walk and wanted to stop and enjoy it."

"It's a beautiful spot isn't it? I come here sometimes when I need space to be alone and think."

A broad smile crossed her face as she remembered her old tree on Takodana, the ancient roots and vines intertwining among boulders, and she felt such an affection well up inside her heart that she wished she could see it again, one last time.

"What's so funny?" Poe asked in mock offense that she was getting a kick out of his confession.

She gave the kind of laugh that can only come when one is reminiscing on happy memories, "It's nothing," she said, "I was just thinking of the place where I used to go when I needed time alone to be with my thoughts."

"You mean you don't have a place like that now?" She shook her head smiling. "Hmm, well, in that case, I mean it's a big field, I suppose we could share it if you really wanted to."

Serela laughed again, this time from amusement rather than memory, and Poe gave her a look that said he was happy to be the one making her laugh. Momentarily, she was tempted to read his mind, to see what he was really thinking about when he looked at her like that. She resisted, telling herself that it was stupid to be curious when he was just a man making a girl laugh, and enjoying that for what it was. No... she did not want to get inside of his head, though a niggling voice inside her managed to whisper to her, What is it you're afraid you will find?

Coming back to the present, she responded cheerily, "I'll take it then!"

"Okay well the problem is that you're sort of standing in my spot at the moment, so if we're going to share we need to divy up the field into halves so we each have our space," he gestured towards the enormous field with his arm and she laughed again, trying to cover her smile with her hand.

"Hmmm..." he pretended to concentrate as he looked out over the field, "I think that corner waaaaay over there can be yours, because unfortunately I'm very attached to my half over here, therefore if you want your space you'll have to take that part."

She played along through her laughter, "Well, I can hardly complain since you're giving me so much space, you said it's that corner over there? The one by the tree in the middle of the field?"

"Yes, the very one," he agreed, his tone falsely serious now.

"Well," she joked, "I can see I've trespassed on your land for far too long as it is. Very good of you to compromise with me, I shall take myself to my own corner now and leave you in peace."

"Please do," the corners of his mouth were lifting with the words.

Serela lifted her long skirt with her hands and began traversing the field to where he had directed her, playing along longer because she couldn't remember the last time she'd actually had _fun_ with someone. She turned around after she was about 50 feet away and pretended to question with her eyes if that was far enough.

"NOPE! Sorry, you gotta go further!" Poe called out to her, waving her onwards with his hand, the other cupped around his mouth to amplify his voice across the waves of grain.

She marched forward further, approaching the tree that stuck out in the middle of the field like a sore thumb, its leafy green branches dangling down seductively. The closer she approached, the closer she felt a camaraderie with this tree. The dark wood of the bark almost called out to her to come and rest her hands against it, the branches beckoning her to take shade beneath them. All jokes aside, this was a good place to come when she needed to be alone; this was a 'thinking' tree.

Serela was almost at its base when she heard heaving footsteps approaching her from behind, and turned just as Poe reached her, laughing as he ran. He bent over and planted his hands on his knees, looking back at the way they had come, his face reflective.

"I've changed my mind," he told her earnestly, "I like this spot better, I'm afraid as the previous claimant to this field I reserve the right to demand a swap."

He looked at her so sincerely she could have almost believed him if she didn't know his nature by now. Without warning, they both double over laughing, Serela holding her belly to her as she lost herself in the humour of the moment. Winded from his antics, Poe flopped down on a patch of grass directly at the foot of the tree and lay back with his hands behind his head, breathing deeply.

Not wanting to appear rude by standing there Serela made to sit down too, leaving enough room between them that it wouldn't be awkward either way. Poe rolled over and rested his head on his palm the other reaching down to pick at a sprig of grass, wheedling it in his fingers as he looked at her rubbing her belly softly.

"How do you feel?" he asked suddenly, she looked weary with the question.

"As well as can be expected I suppose."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning I'm pregnant by the most hated man in the galaxy, whom incidentally is on his way here right now with an army to take me back so the horrible people he works for can take my baby the second he's born and kill me for refusing to accept their ways. Plus there's the fact that I'm putting countless lies in danger just by being here, and not all of them are even in the Resistance. My camp is full of natives to D'Qar who never asked for this, they have no allegiance either way, but regardless they're going to be swept up into it one way or another." Her eyes were off gazing across the field, enjoying the comforting sway of the grain in the breeze. Poe's face however, was fixed upon hers, watching her every expression for clues on how to respond.

"No one blames you though Serela, that's what you need to understand."

"Yeah, well, I blame myself," she laughed gloomily, "For being stupid enough to get caught up in this mess. Ruining the lives of my mother and probably too many others in the process."

"You couldn't know that though. You were on a remote planet..."

"Where I still had my mother who told me it was a terrible idea!" she snapped, "You shouldn't make excuses for me, I don't deserve it!" She immediately regretted the words when she saw his wounded expression. "I'm sorry," she apologised, "This just isn't a situation I ever thought I would find myself in."

"Most anyone you talk to would say the same thing though. Nobody is in the same position as you Serela, but nobody is really where they thought they would be either. Think about the General. You think she ever expected she'd be mourning the betrayal of her son and the murder of her husband at his hands? We make choices yes, but none of us can really control how those choices affect us. We can only see the consequences, make the best of them and move on."

They were wise words, and sounded very akin to something her mother would tell her if Serela relayed all of this inner turmoil to her. She didn't though; she chose to keep it tucked away inside herself, as a penance for her naiveté that had generated this mess of a situation.

Poe was about to speak more words of comfort to her when they were interrupted by the static noise of the radio on his hip.

"Dameron? Dameron come in." The voice belonged to Admiral Statura.

Hastily unclipping the radio from his belt Poe brought it to his mouth, "Yes, Admiral?"

""The Finaliser has just appeared on our radar. They're within a two hour range of D'Qar. We need you back here as soon as you can to prepare for an assault."

"Roger," he replied, and the radio went silent.

Serela looked at him, eyes wide. "They're here?"

He shook his head, eyes furrowed in concentration as he stood, "Not yet, but they're about to be."

 _WOW. So after I got so many wonderful responses from people I just wanted to close with a few (a.k.a. a lot of) notes:_

 _#1. Thank thank thank you for all the feedback, again. I know I sound like a broken record, but it means so much._

 _#2. Hux sucks. Yes, very much so. I don't want to give away any spoilers about the end of the story but suffice to say I have written a lot of it and I hope it's very satisfying to you because it is to me. *wink*_

 _#3. To sort of tie in with my last statement, I've started at the end of the story and began moving backwards because I've been struggling a bit to figure out how my whole timeline is going to work with the First Order and the Resistance going at it in conjunction with Serela's pregnancy. Also, I know everyone is looking forward to Serela and Kylo's reunion and it is coming, but I can't rush it or the whole thing will feel forced and ridiculous so I'm trying to get there for everyone's sakes, but have patience with me. I want their reunion too!_

 _#4. I've gotten mixed reviews on the possible relationship between Serela and Poe and again I can't give spoilers to my own story but I'm hoping you'll be happy with where and how that situation goes. I'm trying to be careful not to fall into that cliche love triangle trap, but we shall see what you guys think as the story progresses. Hopefully no Team Edward/Team Jacob-esqe rivalry. LOL_

 _#5. Lastly, as of right now I'm going to stick with the Saturday posting schedule because I've found it takes pressure off of me (pressure I'd been putting on myself) to crank out chapters as fast as possible. I've got other commitments at home (husband, housework, hedgehog...other responsibilities that start with H ;) so basically if I get something finished early I might post it depending on my weekend plans or hold onto it until Saturday so it will relieve my stress (I'm warring against my perfectionist nature here to just post a whole chapter everyday, which in hindsight, is unrealistic at the length they're becoming.) That being said, some of you liked the idea of Saturday posting, and some didn't, so I'm trying to be respectful of everyone's time here, including mine. I'm not saying I won't update earlier if I have it, but I guess I'll just keep people on their toes, lol._

 _It's crazy to think I've been posting this now for a whole month. I don't know about you, but for me it feels like a lot has happened in so many ways, just in my progress of the story and where I feel like the characters are being taken to on an emotional level. I hope those who had initial reservations about the story and certain plot points are feeling validated in the way things have progressed and I certainly hope everyone who's reading stays with the story until the end. If you want to follow me on Wattpad my penname is the same as on here, yddraig318_

 _Have a great rest of the week!_


	35. XXXV The Beginning

Things moved quickly after Poe received word that the First Order was arriving. Both of them had run for the base, Serela waddling as fast as she could after him and Poe communicating his position to someone on the receiving end of his radio.

"We need to find Serela," she heard Admiral Statura's voice emit from it when they paused to rest for a minute, after Poe assured her it was not that much further.

"I have her here with me," Poe spoke into the device, "Send someone to the camp to find her mother and bring her to base. Tell the locals to stay put. We'll help them evacuate tonight when it's dark. But make sure you get Reha first."

Serela's heart swelled: He had remembered her.

The baby was awake as they made for the safety the base provided, and he seemed to sense the urgency, kicking with such gusto that she thought he was trying to lend himself to her speed. When they finally came upon where Serela knew one of the side entrances to be she balked, "Where is the door?" she cried.

Poe grabbed her hand and led her to an overgrown patch in the wall. The greenery hanging from the roof of the base looked fake and he stuck in his hand, seeming to find something and twisted it. With a rusty creak he pushed the hidden door open and swiftly pulled Serela inside, locking it carefully behind them.

"One of our precautions," he explained to her with a wink and a tap of an index finger to his forehead. Their hands were still joined and before Serela could move to change that Poe was jogging again through the labyrinth of hallways, half-dragging her behind him.

At the junction between three hallways Poe skidded to a stop as the speakers began to blare the voice of Leia, "Members of the Resistance, this is not a drill. Report to your stations immediately, the First Order will be here within the hour."

Serela's throat felt dry and when she tried to swallow she felt like she was going to choke. This was all happening so fast, and all because of her... The walls seemed to be closing in around her and she could feel the familiar sensation of beginning to pass out.

"Serela!" Poe cried, and she felt his arms under her shoulders and knees as she slipped quickly into the vision.

This time Kylo was on board the Finalizer, standing in a large room with a high ceiling and a throne in front of him which shimmered with a menacing figure atop it.

"Have all the preparations been made?" the ghastly creature spoke down at Kylo's masked self.

"Yes."

"You will find the girl, and bring her back here to me."

"Yes."

"And if you fail to retrieve her willingly, what must you do?"

"Kill her."

Serela opened her eyes to see Poe looking down at her, his strong arms still encompassed her body.

"Are you alright?" he asked, and tried to set her back down on her feet.

"Y-yes," she stuttered, but unlike previous times she found her balance quicker and stood with only one hand on Poe's arm.

"Can you make it a little further?"

"I think so...yes. Yes, definitely."

He smiled, and she felt his hand on her arm now as she dropped hers.

"Poe!" the radio sounded. It was Snap Wexley's voice this time. "Get Serela somewhere safe and meet us in the room closest to the launch pad. The General wants us in the air in 30 minutes or less!"

"Got it," Poe responded, and pulled her into the hallway on the left that she had never been down before. She remembered him saying that this was the barracks the first day he had shown her around here. They stopped in front of a door in the middle of the hallway and Poe let go of her hand to fumble in both pockets until he heard the jingle of keys.

Once found, Poe picked the largest key and inserted it into the doorknob, turning it until it clicked. "You'll be safe in here for now," he assured her, opening the door and flipping on the lights before leading her into a somewhat messy room.

As her eyes adjusted to the bright fluorescent lighting she looked around, taking in the confined space. Furnishings in this room were sparser than in Leia's chambers but it still had somewhat of a homey feel. The desk in the corner had maps and drawings of different ships and planets on the wall above it, with various stacks of paperwork strewn across its surface. A bunk bed against the wall had no sheets on the top level, and the blankets on the bottom bunk were left dangling over the edge of the starched white mattress and onto the concrete floor. There was a sink to her right, and a door hung open to reveal a small bathroom. The only other piece of furniture in the room was a tall chest of drawers, each one of them left open and the contents thrown inside without care; a pair of white briefs lay on the floor in front of it.

Hastily Poe made to pick them up and shove them into the top drawer, shutting it with force, "Sorry for the mess," he apologized sheepishly, and ran his hands through his hair.

"It's fine, don't worry about me," she gave a faint smile of reassurance, "I'll be fine, really," she promised.

Poe seemed hesitant to leave her here, but the idea of taking her down into the bunkers wasn't appealing either.

"I'll let Leia know where you are and to have your mother brought to you here when she arrives. You can stay as long as you like and sleep or whatever. I've got some food stashed in the bottom drawer over there if you get hungry. Otherwise someone will come by to check on you later, probably Luke, and move you to somewhere more comfortable. I just didn't want to leave you in a place unfamiliar when your mother isn't here yet."

Touched again by his thoughtfulness, Serela's hand naturally gravitated towards his own and curled her fingers around his. "Thank you," she said genuinely, and the look she received was perplexing. He stared at her as if trying to communicate a thousand unsaid things in that moment, but she either couldn't or didn't want to let herself comprehend them.

He came in closer and brought his other hand onto her shoulder, facing her directly. "I'll come back here to find you if things go well and I can get back tonight. Otherwise it might be a few days of camping out in the field, trying to keep their eyes occupied other places than here. If not I'll figure out where to find you when I get back."

Vaguely uncomfortable by the intimacy of this pose, Serela nodded and closed her eyes to avoid looking too deeply into his. A warm hand on her belly made them shoot back open in alarm, "Take care of yourself. And him," Poe whispered, bestowing a chaste kiss on her cheek. The baby leapt at the contact and she was so stunned from the unexpected affection that she stood there many minutes after he turned and left, her mind racing. Once she began to process all that had just occurred she felt lightheaded and decided to make herself sit down.

The bed seemed the most likely place, so she gathered all the blankets in her arms and dropped them at the foot. Almost as soon as she sat down she felt the fainting sensation again, and her body slumped to the side on the pile of blankets as another vision took her.

There was Hux, his evil presence making her cringe even now. He stood in the same room Kylo had been in before and speaking to the same figure, except this time Kylo was noticeably absent.

"Supreme Leader, we are approaching D'Qar as we speak and should be there within the hour."

"Good, any sign of the main Resistance base?"

"Not yet, there are many potential outposts on the planet and the population outside of the Resistance is sizable, so it's difficult to tell yet where exactly they are located, but it should not take us long. Within no more than a few weeks we should be able to narrow down all possible locations."

"The girl may be in hiding. Even if you find the main Resistance base she might not be in it."

"True, but most likely General Organa will want to keep her precious future grandchild close to her. I doubt she would allow her to be sent away, but if she did, it will likely not be far."

His cruel smile turned her stomach as he grinned up at his Master, receiving an equally jovial expression in return.

Hux spoke again, "If Kylo Ren should fail..."

"He will not fail. You have seen to that General Hux. His reconditioning was successful and your continued control over him has been instrumental to our cause thus far."

"Yes Supreme Leader, but if it fails. If, somehow, the whore awakens the Light side of him again and we cannot retain him, I have developed a new plan which would give us a tactical advantage. By imbuing more Dark power into another individual they might, even without the aid of the Force, become equally as powerful as Kylo Ren, and destroy him should the need arise."

The figure looked down at Hux perceptively, "You mean to offer yourself for this task." It was a statement, not a question.

"Yes, Supreme Leader," Hux spoke hungrily, he clearly had been waiting a long time to have this idea heard, "I have been working with the same team who developed the serum we pumped into Kylo Ren during his reconditioning and together we believe we have constructed the makings of a super serum which might make Kylo Ren's powers obsolete, or at least level the playing field should he be corrupted again. I would be honoured to offer myself as the test subject."

"If what you say is true, then the serum is already prepared?"

"Yes," Hux replied happily, as though he were a child showing his work of art to a person he greatly admired, "Whenever you say the word I will happily submit myself for the experiment."

Grim eyes surveyed Hux and the creature stroked his chin with his long, pale fingers.

"We shall see what becomes of our efforts with Kylo Ren first General, but keep the serum close at hand. If we have need of it I don't want there to be a delay. How long would it take to be effective?"

Hux grimaced like his answer would pain him to speak it out loud, "Likely a month worth of transfusions for it to reach it's full potency."

"A month is a long time General."

"Yes, but in order to wipe out the Resistance once and for all, it would be but a moment's worth of time," Hux persuaded.

Hollow eyes narrowed down at him, "You truly believe Kylo Ren will fail in his quest."

"I believe that he has always been unnaturally turned by her power over him. Whatever control it is that she exerts, be it conscious or unconscious, it still holds some sway. The Resistance cannot be ignorant of this, and if they are able to find a way to undo what we have done using her, we would do well to have a backup plan in place."

"Then go, oversee the preparations for our invasion of D'Qar. We shall see where the chips fall and act accordingly."

"Yes, Supreme Leader," Hux said excitedly, turning to leave as the vision ended.

When she came to, Serela was conscious of the sounds of running water and a cool rag on her face, then the shifting of her head as her mother's warm body settled next to her, lifting Serela's face onto her lap as she dabbed away the sweat from her brow.

"That was the longest I've ever been in a vision," Serela observed. Her eyes were just beginning to refocus as a large brown object in the corner moved, startling her into sitting up.

"Rest padawan, it's me," Luke soothed, and when his hand stretched out in her direction she felt a cooling sensation that calmed her mind, giving her a sense of tranquility in spite of what she had just witnessed in the vision.

Luke came closer and Serela reached out to grab his hand abruptly. She closed her eyes, inviting him into her mind to see what she had just watched.

Curiously, Luke watched and listened both scenes multiple times. Serela felt as though she was taking a backseat inside of her own head as he played, rewound, replayed the scenes again and again.

Reha's presence beside Serela gave her comfort as she waited for Luke to finish and explain all of this to her. When he finally did though, he offered her no such explanation.

"This has given me a great deal to think on Serela, I will retreat to my chambers and meditate. I advise you do the same. I've showed your mother to the rooms you'll be using until we need to go deeper underground. Please go to them and wait for word from myself or another member of the Resistance. Someone will come by and bring you meals until the time when we decided how to proceed."

Dumbfounded at his lack of transparency, Serela was nonetheless too tired to argue and instead asked only a single word question, "Poe?"

Luke's eyes watched her face warily, "He is in the air with his comrades, distracting the First Order for as long as they can on the other side of the planet. We likely will not see him for many days yet," he spoke grimly, "If at all."

 _Author's Note: Okay, this was one of those times I finished earlier than Saturday and since I'm pretty confident I can pump out at least one more chapter between now and then I went ahead and posted it in honour of St. David's Day, for those few of you who also celebrate it. I've been eating welshcakes for the past 2 days and have just enough to take to work tomorrow and convert my coworkers to their addictive taste. Hope everyone had a great weekend!_


	36. XXXVI The Chance

The next three weeks seemed to pass in a never-ending cycle of the same repetition day after day. Serela and her mother shared a bunk bed in an empty room close to Leia's in the officer's quarters. In the mornings Luke and Rey joined them in the room for breakfast, and a table from the cafeteria was produced exclusively for this purpose. It was brought down the morning after Poe's departure, and when Serela resisted, Finn and Rey reminded her that it would not be missed. Most of the Resistance was still occupied out in the field and the kitchen staff did not need to provide nearly as much.

No word came of Poe specifically for the first week, just general bits of information about the success of distracting the First Order while the natives had either fled to their distant relatives or taken shelter in the bunkers of the Resistance base.

Luke continued to train her and Rey, though without being able to venture outside it proved difficult. In the mornings Serela and Rey worked with Luke on controlling the powers in their mind, moving objects and restricting movement in one another. Now one week shy of being in her 8th month of pregnancy, Serela was usually too tired in the afternoons to participate in anything else, even just watching Rey practicing lightsaber feints and jabs made her feel winded.

Sometimes Luke asked her to let him see the visions she had witnessed again, and she always obliged him. Afterwards however, she would note with concern the way he looked at her as if she were some kind of ticking time bomb. She didn't let on that she felt this way, as she had almost perfected the art of keeping her thoughts a secret to herself, unless she _wanted_ to share them.

Dr. Kalonia continued to monitor the pregnancy and said that Serela had no cause for concern other than the uncommon amount of stress on her shoulders during her condition. A derisive laugh at the scolding had been her only answer. She saw the doctor conferring with Luke once when she had been roaming the halls for exercise, their heads bowed low in hushed conversation. Serela had been curious, but moved along when Dr. Kalonia gave her a look that said this was not a conversation for her ears.

It was obvious that Rey was worried for Finn almost as much as Serela was for Poe. He had been sent on a ground mission to another nearby base to try and fortify what reserves they could in case of an invasion here. The majority of fighting had taken place in the air during the daylight hours, and Serela and Rey both breathed sighs of relief every time a list of casualties was produced at the nightly meetings without Poe or Finn's name on it.

There was still no sign of Kylo or Hux, and during a meeting in the second week, Admiral Statura speculated that the First Order was likely trying to weed out what members of the Resistance they could through superior firepower and sheer mass of numbers.

"They're trying to wait us out," he explained, "They know we can only last but so long through an air assault. Once we abandon the attempt to combat them primarily in this way, they will launch a land invasion and it will be massive. It is likely then that Kylo Ren will make his appearance. We've received intelligence that once they capture Serela their plan is to level the rest of the planet, sparing no one."

"Which we will not allow to happen," Leia quipped when she noted the pale expression on Serela's face.

"Agreed," Statura continued, "But we desperately need a plan that will allow us to protect Serela and the child while at the same time defeating the First Order. Anyone with ideas we advise to please come forth with them now."

Silence answered him, and shaking his head, Statura looked around the group of people, his worried eyes finally coming to rest on Serela.

"Very well. Dismissed."

The grouping for their council meetings was now much smaller with many of the others off working and fighting, and it felt hollow to her when she looked at the empty space beside her where Poe would have stood, and Finn next to Rey. Both girls looked at each other and tried to give one another a comforting smile. Serela was about to leave, even getting so far as the doorway when she turned around to look for the Admiral and ask him something.

Unexpectedly, Luke stepped towards her and Serela felt his hand on her elbow suddenly guiding her down the hallway. _I need to speak with you padawan._ Confused as to why they did not simply communicate in Force-speak as they had been doing for so long now, she nonetheless allowed him to lead her down the halls, forgetting her question for Statura. After several minutes they stopped and entered the room she had first met him in when she discovered her mother was alive, and when she turned to shut the door she saw Dr. Kalonia directly behind them, slipping inside before the lock clicked behind her.

Luke spoke unobtrusively, keeping his voice low and forgoing Force-speak in favor of all three present being able to hear what transpired, "Serela, what we need to talk to you about is very serious, but it is something that cannot be attempted without your consent. Now we feel the time has come for us to explain everything that we know and suspect before we inform Leia and the council."

Stunned, Serela's eyes bounced back and forth from one to the other, looking for some hint of what was to come. It was Dr. Kalonia who spoke next:

"I think-" she paused to take a deep breath, "We have devised a way to bring Kylo Ren back."

The expression on Serela's face was not one she could see, but if she had, she would have known the way her face almost glowed, even from just that small sentence.

"How?" she asked desperately.

"Serela, I need to explain to you what we believe will work, but we cannot proceed unless you agree, and the trade-off does have complications."

Alarmed now, she narrowed her eyes and moved closer, speaking furtively as she asked, "So what is the cure?"

Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, Dr. Kalonia spoke again, "I haven't even told Leia this yet, because the only chance we can think of comes directly from you, so it made the most sense to come to you first, because if you don't agree there's no going forward with it."

Serela almost stamped her foot in impatience, "Whatever it is I'll do it! I can't stand this suspense anymore!"

Kalonia swallowed, "If we can remove the serum controlling Kylo's mind and filling his body with darkness by transfusing his blood with another's, it might work and allow him the mental clarity to return to us. The problem is that most people are made of a mix of Dark and Light, so their blood would likely not contain enough potency to make much of a difference."

Immediately, Serela's eyes widened at the implication. "You need my blood." Not a question; a sudden understanding.

"Yes," Dr. Kalonia agreed, "Your genetic makeup as a Lightkeeper might be the only one with enough Light inside your system to overpower the Darkness they've been pouring into him."

Serela began to feel shaky, and she reached out to take hold of the doctor's wrist for stability. "Is it dangerous for the baby?"

"It can be, which is why we came to you first. We cannot go the route of filtering blood from each of you into the other, because that would lessen the power of your own. The only way would be to extract enough blood from you over a period of days to completely replace the blood inside of Kylo Ren. Our hope is that when he finally completes the transfusion process that he will wake up a new man."

"But you can't guarantee it?"

Dr. Kalonia shook her head, "Nothing is certain my dear. What is certain is that we are running out of time, and this is the only viable option we have come up with. You are very far along in your pregnancy so we could not take much without causing distress to the fetus, but if we took 2-3 bags over the next few days and kept you on bed rest at the base, that might be enough to start with once we have him here.

"How do you propose we get him here?"

This time Luke answered, and she saw how Dr. Kalonia pursed her lips as if she did not think this was a good idea.

"We would set a trap for him," Luke explained, "And you would draw him close to the base where you could distract him and we could sedate him. Then he would be brought here and kept under close watch until the transfusion could take place. It will weaken your powers, but indeed, the pregnancy has already taken a toll on your energy levels so you should not exercise them in large bursts except in the case of emergency. In fact most likely after the birth and a tremendous amount of blood loss your powers will be weakened for several months. However, in the event our plan fails, it will likely be the end of us all."

"So if we don't do this, we all die? If we do, and it doesn't work, we still die?" Serela asked, the odds feeling insurmountable in the moment.

"Yes, but it is the only plan we have at the moment," Dr. Kalonia answered her quickly.

"Well, after you put it like that... when?"

"Sometime in the next week most likely. We will have to inform Leia and the council tonight, then they will likely bring all members of the Resistance back to the base to regroup and prepare for the invasion. Depending on how well we cover ourselves it might still be many more days until the First Order finds us. We'll need all the time we can get."

Serela nodded that she understood.

"Very well then," Kalonia spoke to both of them, but her eyes were directed at Luke, "We will tell Leia tonight. I expect she'll agree, if so you may report the the medical bay tomorrow afternoon, not until you've eaten lunch though, so fill yourself up. You'll be staying in the medical bay for a few days. Let your mother know so she can come with you, she can sleep on a hospital bed next to yours."

"Thank you," Serela murmurered, and taking that to mean she was dismissed, left the room quietly.

Luke and Kalonia faced each other, and his soothing voice tried to assuage her troubled spirit, "Without Serela's powers, we need Kylo to return to us. He is the only one powerful enough to stand against the First Order without her."

"That's a big risk to take."

"It is, but her and her son will otherwise be taken. There is no way we could all stand against the First Order and win. Not with only myself and Rey against clone armies, storm troopers, and the Sith. We need Kylo back."

"I agree," Dr. Kalonia admitted begrudgingly, "But she grows more tired and frail every day. Her stress eats away at her, surely you can see that? I worry for the child if she has to go through another month of this uncertainty. I don't think her body can take much more."

Luke's hand waved across her face, "Rest easy Kalonia, I have seen what the Force has shown me. She and the babe will live through this, though Kylo's future is less certain."

Her anxiety lessened by his control, Dr. Kalonia nonetheless sighed, "Let's hope you're right."

 _Author's Note: Okay so apparently I'm getting a second wind of writing inspiration here... either that or I'm just ready to get through this so I can concentrate on something else since this has occupied an enormous amount of my time almost immediately since the beginning of 2016. LOL. Thanks for the continued feedback guys, you rock!_


	37. XXXVII The Plan

Her first day in the medical bay had felt daunting, but after Leia came to her room the same night Luke and Dr. Kalonia had explained their plan to her, and hugged Serela to her body so tightly, she knew it was the only way forward.

"Thank you," Leia had whispered to her, lips brushing Serela's forehead as she did. Tears streamed down her face and onto her shirt, "Thank you for giving me a chance to get my son back."

The pain of the needle had not been as bad as she thought, and with Reha and Leia both there holding her hands, she felt better. It might have also had something to do with the fact that Luke stood in the corner staring at her, and she could feel his calming rays bouncing off her mind like beams of sunshine.

She tried to concentrate on the feeling of the sun on her face while the blood drained out of her arm. Woozy, but determined, she closed her eyes and focused in on the memories she kept close to her heart: lazy days on Takodana, the rustle of the trees in the wind, Kylo's lips on hers.

"Are you feeling okay?" Reha asked in concern. She had been more reluctant at the idea, but after Luke's insistence that without this risk most likely Serela and her future grandson would be retaken she had come round to the suggestion. Still, it didn't mean she liked it.

Serela squeezed her hand, "Yes. I'm doing this for all of us," she reminded Reha, and smiled faintly, already feeling dizzy from the loss of blood.

Dr. Kalonia entered from the door beside her bed with a clipboard. Her fingers pushed reading glasses up the bridge of her nose and scribbled something on the paper, then addressed the three women in front of her, "Normally we would tell a blood donor to just eat and drink something and then go about their daily routine, but given the advanced stage of Serela's pregnancy I'm going to hold her here overnight for the next few days so we can monitor the fetus to be sure the blood loss is not affecting him adversely."

Both women nodded at her, Leia stroking the top of Serela's head in affection.

"What if it doesn't work?" Serela asked in a hushed tone meant only for Leia, the strange sensation of blood leaving her body heightening her anxiety.

"Then we will have tried everything humanly possible to bring him back," Leia stated simply, but the look of turmoil in her eyes suggested letting go of the possibility for her son's rehabilitation would be anything but simple for her.

The doctor said nothing, listening to the exchange between the women impassively, as though she had heard all of this before.

"We'll only take one pint today Serela, then you must be sure to eat plenty for dinner, breakfast and lunch tomorrow so we can do it again. You're very small and your veins were difficult to find, so I'm going to leave the needle in until we're finished with the whole procedure if you don't mind."

Serela agreed, if only halfheartedly. She hated the idea of keeping this thing inside of her arm any longer than necessary.

Dr. Kalonia looked at the bag of blood hanging from the hospital bed and checked her watch. "Only a few more minutes," she assured Serela when she caught a look at her worried face.

Resting her head back against the pillows, Serela felt a light squeeze from Leia, and in less than a moment she felt herself fall into the same dark place she always went when one of the visions overtook her.

She saw Kylo in his chambers, the same ones Phasma had brought her to all those months ago when he had tried so hard to seduce her to the Dark side. It had been very difficult not to give in she remembered, and a familiar feeling stirred in her stomach, a hunger that Kylo brought out in her which only he could satisfy.

He was sitting on his bed, arms braced on his legs as he looked down at something, a black mask of some sort.

"Help me grandfather," he spoke, "I feel it again. The call to the Light. I can always feel it more when she is near me. We are so close now... and the child..." his voice trailed off; the mask muffling the deep natural timbre of his speech.

Her throat burned with the effort of holding in her tears and she groaned softly. She wanted to reach out to him, take off that evil mask and kiss him until the Darkness melted out from his body naturally. There was nothing she wouldn't give to bring him back to her and the baby, and here now in the vision she remembered that she was doing exactly that.

Kylo seemed to sense someone else's presence in the room and turned around suddenly as she sniffled.

"WHO'S THERE?"

Scared, she stumbled backwards in the vision, trying not to trip on the shimmering surface of the floor that she was standing on but not quite part of.

Kylo's body came near and she stood still where she was, unsure if he could actually see her or not. Eventually he planted his feet only inches away from her, and with a hiss he removed his mask, revealing the beautiful tortured face of the man she loved beyond all reason.

His eyes peered right through her, as though he could see her but not see her at the same time.

"Serela?" he breathed.

She woke in the hospital bed again, Leia was patting her hand and Reha was helping Dr. Kalonia hold the bag of blood steady as she detached it from the needle in Serela's arm. Her face felt hot and red, and she looked to Leia for any recognition of what she'd seen.

 _ **You must be more careful in your visions Serela**_. Luke's voice in her head startled her and she looked into the corner where he still stood, his eyes watching her.

 _ **Did he really see me? How? No one else in these visions has been able to.**_

 _ **Partly. He likely did not see you in a solid form, more like a shadow of you since you're untrained in the art of transplanting yourself through visions. The reason he was able to see you partly this time and not others is because some of your visions have been of the future, and others of the present. Usually the ones in the present though have happened while Kylo is with Snoke and distracted, or with Hux, who to my knowledge contains no trace of the Force, therefore he would not sense you there at all. Meanwhile Snoke's presence is only a hologram, an illusion of him in the absence of the physical self, therefore he could not sense you as acutely as if he'd been there physically.**_

 _ **How do I control them? Does Kylo know where we are now?**_

 _ **Unlikely, but you must be careful to never interrupt the vision you're given. If it happens again, he could force his way into your mind and see where we are hidden. You must try and avoid this at all costs until we are prepared.**_

 _ **Yes...Master.**_

That night Reha slept in the hospital bed next to her, and the following nights as well. On the 4th morning Serela was released, tired and wobbly, but able to walk on her own back to the room. She slept until the late afternoon, wishing she could go above ground to the surface and feel the sun, sure that it's rays would recharge her depleted energy.

Instead she opted to take a walk through the hallways again. It wasn't long after she'd passed the cafeteria on her way towards the council chambers that she almost collided with Rey.

"Oh Serela! SERELA they're back!"

"Who?" she asked, her heart already leaping in her chest with the knowledge of who it must be.

"Finn and Poe! The others! All of them just got back!" Rey's enthusiasm was so contagious Serela almost forgot they were on the cusp of war; in another situation they might have been two normal girls waiting for their boyfriends to return home from a long trip away.

 _But Poe isn't your boyfriend_ her mind reminded her, and she felt a strange ache in her stomach at the thought.

"Where are they?" she forced a smile when she asked, and Rey's broadened at the response.

"They're in the underground landing bay, it's located under the regular landing strip but it's very difficult to find if you don't know where it is. Admiral Statura is there debriefing them, but he's saving some big news for the council meeting." Rey's body seemed like it was bouncing with every word, and Serela had to laugh at her fervor, though inwardly she cringed, knowing full well what the 'big news' the Admiral planned to share was.

"C'mon," Rey grabbed her hand, "If we head to the council chambers now we can meet them at the door!"

The two of them took off, navigating the hallways with ease in their haste to be the first ones to welcome Poe and Finn home. Deep in her gut though, Serela felt a deep uneasiness at the thought of Poe hearing everything that had transpired in the last several weeks.

They were the first to arrive, standing outside the empty council room like two love-struck teenagers. Rey tapped her feet impatiently and Serela tried to stretch her back, wishing she had grabbed a chair to sit in until the guys arrived. Thankfully, they didn't have to wait much longer.

If Serela had expected Rey to scream and jump up and down when Finn came down the hallway, she was mistaken. The giddiness Rey had been exhibiting ever since they'd found each other in the hall gave way to calm composure as they waited for the troop of pilots and land soldiers to come down the hallway in unison.

Poe was near the back, talking and laughing with someone else in an orange jumpsuit. Serela caught sight of his dark, wavy hair just as Finn got close enough to Rey to hoist her into his arms in a big bear hug, spinning her around.

Serela smiled at them wistfully, knowing she was far too pregnant for any man to do that with her, but she still watched the sweet gesture with longing.

When Poe caught sight of her he jumped up from behind the masses of people still making their way down the hall, and waved his hand as high as he could to get her attention. Smiling, Serela gave a light wave in return before being pulled into Finn's arms in a much gentler hug than the one he'd given Rey.

"Still pregnant then?" he asked teasingly, "I thought the sadness of our departure would have been enough to send anyone into labour."

She and Rey laughed. "Well," Serela began, "If it were a month later than it is I would say you're probably right."

The majority of the people had passed by, and in the midst of her joking with Finn she had taken her eyes off of Poe, so she was not expecting it when she felt herself once again being pulled into a pair of strong arms.

"I missed you," Poe whispered into her ear so low no one else could hear it. They broke apart from each other and Serela felt flustered. So much was happening and there didn't seem to be enough time to process it all. She knew she needed to share the news of Kylo's potential rehabilitation with Poe before he heard it from somewhere else, but felt uncertain on how to do it with so many people around. There was no need though. Finn's hand swung up to rest on the small of Rey's back as he blurted out, "So what's this I hear about how we're going to cure Kylo Ren?"

Poe's suddenly went still, his rigid body more like a statue than a man as he turned his head towards Serela to confirm what he heard was true. Rey looked at Serela dumbfounded as well, all three waiting for her to answer.

"Maybe," she breathed softly, and looked into Poe's eyes in a mixture of guilt for not having told him and a silent plea for him to take the news well.

He did not.

"There is no cure for him," Poe murmured dangerously, "He's a traitor and a killer! He murdered his own father and kidnapped you and let that demon ginger guy torture you all while pregnant, what kind of cure is there for something like that other than death?"

Serela shook her head, feeling a flare of temper rise within her, "You're taking things out of context, we think the First Order— "

"No, YOU'RE conveniently forgetting things because _some_ people on this base still can't let go of the fact that their family member grew up to be a monster."

Angrily, Serela backed away from him and bumped into Rey's shoulder. "What is wrong with you," she asked in a low voice, and Poe's face broke, his furious expression wilting as he tried to close the distance between them again.

"I'm sorry Serela, I just—"

"All those who apply begin to make your way into the council chambers. The rest of you may report to the cafeteria for some much needed hot meals. Great work crew!" Snap Wexley cheered at the rest of the crew still clustered in the hallway, and most of them joined the loud hurrah before they began to disperse in the direction of the food.

Had the announcement come any earlier than Finn's ill-timed comment, this would have elicited cheers from everyone in the hallway. As it was, Poe, Finn and the women remained silent as the group around them erupted into raucous laughter and conversation.

"Let's go inside," Serela said with a tone of sad frustration, and she pushed her way past Poe, not waiting for anyone to agree.

The minutes before the meeting crackled with tension. Poe opted to stand on the opposite side of the table from them, and his foot seemed incapable of being still, shaking as he kept his arms crossed over his chest, brow furrowed in deep, painful thoughts. Serela ignored him as best she could, catching eyes with Rey a few times who shook her head, _**Leave it be for now**_ she told her, _**It's going to be a lot for him to process. For all of us.**_

Serela looked down at the floor and her battered boots. Everything about this situation was so wrong. Under normal circumstances no one could ever fault a woman for trying as hard as she could to save the life of her baby's father, right?

"Thank you all for coming," Leia had taken her place with the Admiral at the head of the table, Snap on her other side, and Poe beside him, "We hope this will be brief, but because our news is vital to the survival of everyone within the Resistance we wanted to relay it to you, our leaders, so you can pass it down to those who report to you." A turn of the head and she deferred the attention to the man beside her.

"It is our belief," Admiral Statura began, "That Kylo Ren is under the influence of a complex drug developed by the First Order, which manages to suppress his leanings towards the Light and effectively control his mind."

"How?" Poe enunciated gruffly, and Serela tried to catch his eye in warning but now he was the one refusing to look at her.

"We're not entirely sure where, but Dr. Kalonia has speculated there might be a small micro chip of some kind planted on his body which continues to supply a heavy does of Darkness to his bloodstream. From what Serela has told us about his reconditioning, we assume there was a long process involved in it, and therefore it will be difficult to undo, though hopefully not impossible."

"But that _would be_ impossible," Finn interjected, "How do you plan to subdue him? The man is basically a Sith!"

Leia and the Admiral both looked at Serela before she answered, "We will set a trap for him, using Serela as the bait."

"NO!" Poe shouted, and the entire room went tense, looking to their best pilot for some explanation of his outburst, but his eyes were pointed directly at Leia.

"I won't have it," he said coldly, "It's a fool's errand. Kylo Ren is not Ben Solo. Kylo Ren is a monster, and if any of us have a chance to take the shot we should destroy him once and for all."

Leia's face went dark, and when she opened her mouth to give her reply, Serela spoke up, "This is my choice, no one else's."

"YOU ARE ALMOST 8 MONTHS PREGNANT!"

"You think I don't know that?" she yelled across the table at him, and felt Rey and Finn's gentle hands on her back as a reminder to not overreact. Calming her voice, she attempted to respond again, "I knew Kylo Ren as a completely different person than the monster the First Order has made him into. He is the father of my son, and Leia's only child. More so if he can be turned back the First Order would stand no chance against us. We owe it to ourselves to try every outlet!"

"No," Poe was shaking his head, refusing to be reasoned with, "You can't offer yourself and your unborn son up as bait, I won't let you."

Serela's eyes glinted dangerously, and she felt the angry feeling in the pit of her stomach rising up at the idea that he presumed to tell her what she could or couldn't do. "Without doing this my son and I are as good as dead, same as everyone else in this room. I am doing this for him, and if I have the blessing of the General and all senior members of the council," she castigated him, "Then that is all I need to go through with this plan."

Poe's face almost crumpled, and the defeated look he briefly held was nothing short of heartbreaking before he recovered and shot back defiantly, "Fine! Go ahead and risk letting yourself be recaptured. Let them possibly take you again, force you to give birth to your son on that ship and then kill you the second he's born! Enjoy your suicide mission! All of you go ahead with whatever insane plans you can cook up, but you'll do it without me!"

With that he pushed his way out of the room, shoving people aside and holding up his hand against Finn and Rey when they tried to stop him. When they finally relented and let him pass he stormed off, his shoulders hunched and footsteps heavy on the cold floor.

 _ **He didn't mean it**_ , Rey tried to comfort Serela, who stared after him like she'd seen a ghost.

All eyes were on her now, and thankfully Admiral Statura spoke again, breaking the awkward silence, "So there we have it. The First Order will begin their land invasion any day now. We need to keep doing all we can to prepare, while Dr. Kalonia and our medical team will research more possible avenues for reversing the reconditioning of Kylo Ren."

Serela squeezed Rey's hand at his words, and they looked at each other in understanding. Both knew the severity of the situation: If we cannot get him back now, then we never will. He will be lost to us forever.

Luke stood across from them, and she caught him looking at her thoughtfully. She could feel him actively trying to probe into her mind and she raised her defenses; she had no interest in letting him see what was in there right now.

Leia dismissed the council and everyone quickly dispersed. Serela turned to catch Finn and Rey's attention but they were the first to duck out, Serela caught a glimpse of their plans to go find Poe and help calm him down.

Feeling somewhat guilty, but too tired physically and emotionally to care at this moment, she walked over to say goodbye to Leia and gave her arm a light squeeze to let her know she was leaving. Admiral Statura was engaged in a quiet conversation with the General so they both nodded to her as she stepped around them to exit.

In the hallway, she passed many of the same people she saw every day, but nobody that she actually knew. Suddenly feeling very lonely, she was just deliberating whether to head back to the room with her mother or rest in the cafeteria and take a meal back when two strong hands reached out from one of the doors she had just passed, covering her mouth and dragging her inside.

The dark room she was pulled into immediately lit up as Poe flipped on the lights and spun her around, pressing her gently against the wall with his hand still over her mouth. His face was uncomfortably close.

"Don't scream, I just want to talk," he promised, and removed his hand. Serela's chest heaved as she tried to calm her heart and resist the urge to slap him. "What...are...you...doing..."

"Trying to prevent you making a terrible mistake," he answered unapologetically.

Serela rolled her eyes, "I appreciate your concern but I personally don't think it's a mistake to try and save the man who fathered my child."

Poe 's hand slapped the wall hard in frustration and she jumped, putting her hands out in front of her to push him away if he got too close again.

"I'm sorry," he said, resting his forehead on the concrete, "I lost my temper, I just... never dreamed you would do something so dangerous... and for a man who has effectively ruined your life."

She softened her response, trying to find some grace in her heart for him. It was obvious for her from the moment this plan went into action that he would find it hard to bear. "I know it seems hard to believe. It's a difficult road that I've chosen, and there's nothing else for it but to continue down it until it ends."

"But it did end Serela. It ended the day we rescued you from him after you were tortured and threatened at the hands of that other maniac."

"No... it doesn't end there Poe. I don't know how to explain it, the connection between Kylo and I... it's something that defies the laws of rational thought."

Poe's watery eyes met hers, "I thought of nothing but you the entire time I was away Serela. While I was flying and firing at the ships, while I was looking for a safe place to land, while I was sleeping on the cold wet ground; that entire time I was thinking of you and telling myself that I could get through all of that if it meant that you and the baby were safe." He swallowed hard, finding the strength to finish what he most needed to say, "You have to know that I have feelings for you by now, right?"

Serela averted his eyes, she had long expected it, but the confirmation was not welcome.

"Poe... please... I need you to understand. He is the father of my son, my first love, my...everything. I can't just cast him to the wind when there might be a chance to get him back. Leia thinks-"

"The General's judgment is clouded by love for her son!" Poe hissed, "She thinks somehow you're the only one who can bring back Ben Solo and banish Kylo Ren forever!"

"What if I can? Don't I owe it to myself and her to try? Don't I owe it to my son? Or is that letting my love for him cloud my judgment?"

Poe scoffed, "You're twisting my words Serela and I don't like it. You know very well what I mean. I'm looking out for you here, something even Leia isn't doing. You're looking out for the baby, Leia's looking out for the baby, hell, even Kylo Ren and the entire First Order is looking out for him, but who's looking out for you? Hmm? Can you tell me that you feel like if Kylo Ren were here right now and you had the baby in your arms instead of your belly he wouldn't still issue you the ultimatum of convert or die? Tell me that then, please Serela! Tell me you feel like you and your son's well-being are of paramount importance to Kylo Ren, because from where I stand, the only person here looking out for you besides your own mother is ME."

Serela recoiled as if he had struck her with his hands instead of his words. The truth of what he said reverberated in her heart, but the agony of admitting it to herself was too much to bear.

"Don't do this to yourself anymore Serela! Let him go, you can choose to let him go. Choose to move on, for your sake and your son's!" His next words were said in a low murmur, "Choose me."

Her hands had dropped during this exchange and he had moved in, their faces were unnaturally close now and Serela was momentarily afraid that he might kiss her. She turned her face away from his.

"I see..." he said, "Then I guess there is nothing more left to say."

Dejectedly, he opened the door he had pulled her through minutes before, his limp shoulders looked as though they carried the weight of the galaxy upon them.

When she was alone in the room, she bent over trying to breathe in deeply, her heart racing and eyes brimming with tears. What could she have done to prevent this? She had never meant to encourage him in thinking there was something between them, even though she struggled with the temptation to think so on occasion. But now here she was crying over his anguish, taking it on as her own.

 _ **Come out into the hallway**_ , she heard Luke call to her.

Wiping away her tears she obeyed, opening the door to find him standing there, his face soft and understanding. She realised he must know the whole thing.

Serela shut the door behind her after turning out the lights, then folded her arms over her bulging stomach and waited to see what he would say.

 _ **Follow me,**_ he said, and they walked down the halls together, keeping a slow pace so she could keep up as she waddled beside him, her stomach churning in dread.

 _ **What you must understand Serela, is that your power, your goodness, it draws people to you, many times unconsciously. The stronger your powers grow, the more people will be drawn to you without knowing. Those also possessing the Light will seek you out unconsciously, those who possess little or no trace of the Light will be drawn likewise, but instead they will try everything in their power to stamp it out. Like General Hux.**_

 _ **So how much is Poe's attraction to me a result of our encounters versus an unconscious response to my powers?**_

 _ **That's impossible to say, though it likely plays some large part is how he attached to you so quickly, but the same could be said of my nephew. Your power accelerates things Serela, whether you want them to or not. You happened to be ready for love at the time you met Kylo. This dalliance with Poe Dameron has not come at a time when you are as available emotionally.**_

 _ **But I don't want a dalliance with Poe, I want a friendship. I WANT Kylo.**_

 _ **I know, and soon enough we will know if that is even a possibility anymore.**_

They had arrived back at her door, and she held the knob hesitantly, afraid that the moment he left she would be faced with a thousand more questions she would need for him to answer.

He smiled, "You're letting your defenses down again," he chastised her gently, tapping his temple with a finger.

Annoyed with herself, Serela put the walls back up, and tried to cover her embarrassment.

Luke made an effort to make her feel better in spite of this, even resorting to using his voice, "You've done well Serela, very well. You and Rey are two of the most apt pupils I've ever taught. Do not let your mistakes overshadow your accomplishments. I am very proud to be your master."

Serela blushed, and turned the knob to open the door, hoping to escape this awkward moment between student and teacher. She relished his compliments, but now after so much had happened in the last several hours, she wanted to be alone with her thoughts. It was bad enough that she had slipped up her mental defenses once around Luke, she didn't want to repeat it when she mooned over her choice between Kylo and Poe like a schoolgirl.

"Thank you Master, goodnight."

 _ **Goodnight Serela.**_

She barely noted that her mother was already asleep before she collapsed on the bottom bunk, falling into a listless sleep of her own. That night, she dreamed of Kylo again, once more in her arms and in her bed.

The next morning when she woke on the bottom bunk she could hear the sounds of Reha's faint snoring on the bunk above her. She lay still, her short hair splayed out on the pillow and closed her eyes, trying to make sleep come back to her, but the baby was awake now and kicking too much for that.

Sighing, she tried to meditate while lazily tracing circles on her stomach in the hopes of calming him so she could rest some more. The dim emergency lighting in the room illuminated the shapes of what few objects there were. It was similar to Poe's quarters, with a desk, dresser, sink and a door to the bathroom. When she closed her eyes and opened them again, the chair from the desk had moved to the center of the room, and sitting atop it was the foreboding figure of Kylo Ren, his mask laid at his feet.

"KYLO!" she almost screamed, but found that she had no voice.

Gone was the vulnerable stare from yesterday's vision. Here instead was the man she had become accustomed to on the Finalizer: Brutal and ruthless. She sat up and pushed herself against the wall as much as she could, the cold concrete making her shiver as the mattress above her creaked when Reha rolled onto her other side.

"So here you are," he gloated, his imposing black ensemble looked all the more menacing in a room where she could see very little.

"My little Serela," he mused, "Sitting here in a concrete box when she could live like a queen with me aboard the Finalizer... it's insulting really."

She tried to retort that she had only traded a concrete box for the metal one she'd been imprisoned in on his ship but her mouth still wouldn't move, much as she tried.

Kylo's eyes wandered to every corner of the room, trying to find some clue where this base was located. Serela could see the cogs of his mind turning, could feel what he was looking for. He wanted to know where exactly she was so he could come and find her- he made no attempt to hide these thoughts from her.

On the other hand, she struggled to keep up the walls in her mind, and when he came closer she wedged herself into the corner of the headboard and the wall, cringing when he removed one glove and she felt his bare fingers on her temple.

"Don't fight me like the last time," he warned her, and she felt his other gloved hand on her stomach, rubbing her round belly as their son danced for joy in her womb, recognising his father's voice and touch.

"He likes me already," Kylo smiled, genuinely smiled, and again she was reminded of the man inside the monster, the man she loved endlessly.

Knowing there were too many things in her head that she needed for him not to see, Serela made a rash decision. When his fingers made contact with her skin, she showed him the tree in the field of wheat. It's dark trunk contrasted against a blue sky and waves of rolling gold. Standing together in the middle of the field, she placed her hand in his and led him through the tangles of grain to a small copse in the woods, the same one she had found just before stumbling upon this place weeks ago.

Suddenly, her voice returned. "Meet me here, come alone," she whispered in his ear, and his arms circled her waist, bringing her in close. His lips came closer and closer to her, stopping just short of contact, "I will," he whispered back, and then she awoke from the vision with a start.

 _ **Serela...**_ she heard a voice through Force-speak, but this time, she knew it was not Luke's, but Kylo's.

Reha was still asleep, and Serela rose from bed, scoping out the room in a quiet panic that he was still in here with her. A trip into the bathroom to splash cold water on her face momentarily allayed her concerns, but a tiny presence in the corner of her mind told her that even when she couldn't see him in the room with her, he was here now, in her head. The echo of his voice whispering her name still haunted her. Quickly, she changed into her clothes for the day and slipped out into the hallway, careful not to wake Reha and worry her before she could figure out what to do.

 _ **Luke**_ she called out for him, _**Where are you?**_

 _ **Council chambers**_ he replied back, and she hastened down the hall to join him there.

When she entered Luke stood with Leia, Admiral Statura and Poe, all circling the table in the centre. Statura and Leia were still in their night robes, and she felt a heavy sinking feeling that she was about to hear some bad news. After all, what were the odds that she would wake this early and all of them would be gathered here for something unrelated?

"Serela," Leia ventured to ask, "Do you have something you need to tell us."

"Yes," she replied, "I was coming to find Luke and ask him about my latest vision."

Poe cleared his throat but said nothing.

She didn't wait for Luke to come to her, she met him across the table, putting her fingers to his forehead this time instead of waiting for him to do so. Eyes both closed, she showed him the vision: Kylo's invasion of her room and her mind, and her desire to keep their plan a secret from him, leading her to show him where the tree was.

Luke stiffened his posture as he watched Serela lead him through the field of wheat again, and she could feel him noting how close it was to the base itself. Finally he released her and stepped away, placing his hands on the edge of the round table for support as he tried to formulate a new plan.

Serela wanted him to say something, anything.

"This is what I feared."

Well, anything but that.

"What is it?" Leia asked her brother, looking furtively from him to Serela.

A few more moments of silence passed before Luke looked up.

"He's coming."

"Who's coming?" Poe asked as Leia's head sagged in defeat.

"We're not ready," the Admiral stuttered, Serela had never seen him afraid before, and the very sight of it made her stomach lurch with fear, "We thought we'd have a few more days."

Luke glanced at Serela, his expression serious, "We no longer do."

Poe crossed the room and took her hand, begging her to look at him. "What happened? What did you see?"

"Serela's mind was infiltrated by Kylo Ren due to her increasingly vivid visions. He invaded her head this morning and in order to keep him from seeing our plans she showed him a nearby place where she told him to meet her. I have also sensed his movement through the Force. He is coming here. Soon."

"So by connecting with Kylo through the Force she has indirectly led him straight to us?"

"In a way," Luke stated simply.

Poe groaned, and Leia gasped, "Oh Serela, what have you done?"

 _Author's Note: Yes, I'm uploading early. I've got a lot going on this weekend and I've been working on this one all week so I wanted to go ahead and get it posted. I've got a lot written for the next couple chapters but of course I've got to do heavy editing and linking all the plot points together. Lemme know what you thought of this one pls, I know there was/is a lot and everyone is waiting for the resolution between Kylo and Serela but I can tell you **they will definitely meet again in the next chapter** *cue applause*. Thanks again for all the feedback so far it's fun to see how many people are rooting for Poe over Kylo and the reverse. I hope you're pleased with the chapter and the way it's gone, and that I haven't left too many loose ends. Anyways, I'll be checking for your feedback all through my busy weekend, so comment away! :) ;) :*_


	38. XXXVIII The Confrontation

Statura's fist were clenched, "Does he know exactly where our base is?"

"No, but this move has forced our hand. We must be ready to act and retrieve him when he arrives. It will not be very long. An hour or two at most."

The silence stretched in the chilly room, and Serela hugged her arms over her stomach, wishing she could sink into the floor. Once again, she had caused this. On Takodana she had made poor choices which had led to all of this, but now she was responsible for leading Kylo dangerously close to their base.

Luke sensed her contrition and tried to allay her fears, "It was only a matter of time before they found us," he offered, "This doesn't change anything except it speeds up our plans by a day or two."

She nodded that she understood but the fear in Leia's and Statura's eyes did nothing to help quell her guilt. She _had_ caused this - she hadn't kept control, hadn't exercised sound judgement and now once again she was leading people into harms way.

Within an hour the room was full- Finn, Rey, Snap, and all the others who would usually be present for their end-of-the-day meetings had gathered hastily- the Mon Calamari they called Admiral Ackbar was still in his striped pyjamas.

Serela stayed close to the wall, ignoring Rey's attempts to get her attention, even when she resorted to Force-speak, but all met with the same reluctance to answer. Soon she would know. Soon they would all know what she had done and what a dangerous position she had placed them in.

The urge to flee was so strong. To escape this room and this base and get out as fast as she could, but her swollen stomach and feeble legs reminded her that she could barely waddle from this room right now, much less run.

When Leia started speaking, Serela closed her ears, trying to drown out the inevitable gasps and murmurs that would come with the announcement. Dr. Kalonia was there, and Serela weakly tried to listen to what she was saying

"The timing here is far from disastrous. In fact we've been hard at work for days and now believe we have perfected as much as we can without having tested it on a human subject."

"But you've tested it on animal subjects?" Finn asked skeptically.

"Well-no. I haven't met too many animals being injected and brainwashed by the First Order, have you?" Kalonia asked testily.

Finn threw up his hands in a gesture that indicated he was merely asking, and Leia spoke, "What are the things that could possibly happen if the serum you've developed is unsuccessful?"

"It's a mixed bag really. The treatment could work perfectly, turn Kylo Ren back to the Light and make him into a model citizen. It could also kill him with its potency after so much Dark power swimming through his system for so long," Leia could be seen noticeably swallowing a large lump in her throat at the suggestion, "Or he could wake up, be completely unaffected and lead the First Order directly to our base here, killing us all."

The room let that last option sink in as people shifted uncomfortably where they stood, fully contemplating the possibilities that had just been lain out before them.

"So what happens now?" Poe asked Kalonia, but his eyes were trained on Serela.

"Now we continue with the plan," Admiral Statura spoke, his tone sounding like a warning for Poe, "Serela will meet Kylo Ren in the place they agreed upon in her vision, flanked at a distance by our reconnaissance team. She will distract him by any means necessary and we will attempt to sedate him, then bring him back here."

Poe's eyes glinted hard under the fluorescent lighting and it occurred to Serela that she had never questioned why he was in the room with three high-ranking officials less than 12 hours after publicly butting heads with a senior official.

 ** _Why was Poe in here this morning?_** she asked Luke rashly, noting how his head turned just enough for her to notice he heard her.

 ** _He was pacing the hallway outside Leia's room when I came down to wake her and tell her what I saw. He wanted to apologise and ask her to let him take your place. To somehow allow him to try and trap Kylo, or distract him long enough that we could subdue him._**

Serela's heart ached, even after she had crushed him last night, Poe was still looking out for her.

 ** _Of course there was no question of it and we told him so as soon as he asked. It wasn't long after that you came in and here we are now._**

 ** _What can I do? How can I help him to let go of me?_**

 ** _That is not what you need to concern yourself with right now. You are already too overwhelmed for a woman in your condition. Poe knows that and he is trying to help, even if he can't control his feelings towards you._**

 ** _He told me Kylo is a monster beyond redemption. Poe thinks there is no way to rehabilitate him and I am wasting my time and risking the life of my son. It's just that... I saw a different person on Takodana. Kylo never would have been the father of my son if he hadn't shown himself to be a different person than who he is now. I want so much to believe there is a way to bring him back..._**

 _ **But don't you see Serela? If Kylo could even fake being that kind, that good, it means there is still the capacity for that inside of him, in spite of all Snoke's attempts to stamp it out.**  
_

"Serela?" Leia was addressing her now, interrupting their silent conversation.

"Yes?" she answered, embarrassed that she hadn't heard the question.

"Are you ready?"

 _What? Now? They wanted her to go right now?_

"I need to say goodbye to my mother and then yes."

Her heart was drumming and the baby was bouncing up and down, careening from side to side as though he sensed something big was coming. She winced in pain as he gave a particularly painful lurch and she patted her stomach, trying to calm him.

Those who were not taking part in this mission began to disband, and the remaining members, Kalonia, Luke, Leia, Statura, Rey, Finn, and of course, Poe, all stepped forward to stand around her.

"We'll come with you to your room," Finn offered, and she nodded her head, trying to dispel the lump in her throat and the blood rushing to her head. She still felt weak from the blood donation these past two days, but she still had a month to go into the pregnancy and Dr. Kalonia had already told her they would likely need more blood after the transfusion had begun.

They set off as a group towards Serela and Reha's room. Along the way they passed other members of the Resistance who seemed to look on curiously at such a large group of powerful people travelling together, but Serela paid them no mind. It was her mother she needed to see.

When they arrived Serela slipped in quietly, shutting the door behind her the afford them some privacy. She found Reha setting on the edge of her daughter's bed, fumbling with the corners of the blanket; her eyes red and watery. After Serela sat next to her and took her hand the two women cried into each other's shoulders, trying to muffle the sounds of their weeping with their hands as they did.

"I woke up and knew something was different," Reha sobbed, "I felt it the moment my eyes opened. I knew today was the day."

"It's all my fault Mother, all of this. Everything. I've put the lives of so many people in jeopardy and now I have to do it again just for the chance to save them all!"

Reha's fingers wiped the tears from her daughter's cheeks and she forced a smile, "You have already been so brave dear one. You must be brave for a little longer. I do not like this plan, and if there were any other way that seemed remotely possible I would pursue it with everything in me, but I see the wisdom in Luke's words. You have been the key to this all along, and in spite of all my aversion to it, I doubt this could have been stopped one way or another. This-all of this, was _meant_ to happen. Luke has shown me the vision he and Kylo had of you when he was very young. You were always meant to meet him love, and you were meant to carry his child, this little one-" her hand rubbed the top of her stomach, "Was destined to be born long before anyone on this base has ever drawn a breath. I may not be as powerful in the Force as you and Luke, but I have seen it myself. If we can keep him away from the First Order, your son will be the most powerful Jedi this galaxy has ever seen, and he will restore the balance the universe has sought to achieve for so long."

Serela's face was covered in her tears as she listened to her mother tell her all the things she had been waiting to get off of her chest for months now. When Reha was finished, she cradled Serela's face against her chest and kissed the top of her head, "You are a good daughter, my little one, and you will be a great mother. Do not be afraid to do what you must to protect your son and your family. Allow the Force to guide you."

A knock on the door reminded Serela that there were people waiting outside, people depending _on her_ to right this situation and help them obtain the means of ensuring the First Order's downfall. She only hoped she had the strength to see it through...

"I love you Mother."

"And I you, my sweet girl."

The door opened and Luke stepped inside, followed by Poe and Rey- the rest opted to wait in the hallway.

 ** _Time to go_** , Luke spoke to only her, and Rey smiled at Serela reassuringly.

"It will be alright," she assured her, "I've got a really good feeling about this."

Serela gave a weak smile. She wanted to say that she wished the feeling was mutual, but instead she kept her mouth and her thoughts to herself.

"We won't be far behind you," Luke promised her with a pointed look.

Serela nodded and used the bars of the bunk bed to hoist herself to her feet, almost losing her balance and tumbling back onto the mattress with the weight of the baby. Strong, warm hands on her back held her steady and she saw with dismay that it was Poe holding her up. The poor, sweet man whose heart she had effectively broken. With one last, lingering stare at her mother's crestfallen face on the bed, Serela turned and made for the door, Poe and the others in her wake.

She said nothing to him as he accompanied her down the hallway with Luke and Rey, the remainder of the crew waiting behind outside the door to the room. Rey and Finn gave meaningful looks at each other as she passed by them. Along the way, Luke explained that the plan was for Serela to go alone to meet Kylo, but with the rest of the reconnaissance crew trailing not far behind her. Hopefully, if Kylo was focusing most of his attention on finding her, he would not notice the nearby presence of others in the Resistance, or might merely think them run-of-the-mill soldiers.

It was a big gamble, Serela thought, to put all their hopes on her presence being enough to distract him, and she remembered Statura's words at the meeting, _She will distract him by any means necessary._ What had he meant by that? It sounded ominous and explicit somehow, as though she would have to subdue him by means that should not be viewed publicly.

They reached the end of the long hallway that led out to their former meditation grounds. The glow of sunlight around the edges of the rusty metal door promised freedom and warmth outside - Serela could smell the faint traces of fresh air in here through the cracks.

Poe heaved open the door and Luke held back the curtain of leaves for the ladies to pass through first. The first smell of freedom and fresh air hit her like a ton of bricks and she reveled in the scent, fantasizing about lying down right here in the grass and rolling in it.

"Alright," Luke began once the door had been closed again behind them, "Serela will head for the tree in the field, the rest of our group will meet here in 10-15 minutes time and follow after."

Serela thought to herself that seemed like an inordinately long head start for them to give her, but a kick in the ribs from the baby reminded her that she was not going to be keeping a very brisk pace.

"Poe," Luke was addressing him directly, "You'll be in the back of the group, heading up the rear with Finn."

"No, I'm going with Serela."

The remaining 3 paused, "That's not part of the plan Poe," Rey reproved him, and Poe shrugged. "I don't trust _him_ alone with her, not even for a minute."

Serela spoke up for herself, "No! Leia did not approve this and you know she never would!"

"Exactly! Because Leia is more concerned about retrieving and rehabilitating her son than your safety. We're all worried that Kylo is going to sense us coming, and hoping that Serela will be able to distract him. Well, here's my best effort. If I go along with her he'll be more likely to think that she only brought one person, as opposed to her coming completely alone which he would never be stupid enough to think we would allow. If I'm there, he'll think he only has one person to get through, and we're much more likely to catch him off guard."

Luke opened his mouth to speak, then shut it, considering carefully. "He's right," he finally admitted, "It's a better version of our plan, and Kylo will be more likely to let his guard down if he thinks he knows what he's up against."

"Good. Then there's no need to keep arguing about it. You know it's the best option we have and right now we're wasting precious time," Poe's voice had a hard edge to it that made Serela feel uneasy. She wanted Luke to say no, to use the Force and stop Poe from following her and potentially getting himself killed, but instead she was met with Luke's affirmation that Poe's dangerous intentions were valid.

Inside her head felt like it was a pot beginning to boil over, and she felt sure her face was as red and steam was emitting from her ears. With no words to any of them, she turned on her heel and began to trek away from the base and into the treacherous brush on her way to an uncertain future.

Poe wasted no time in following, his steady footsteps plodding just behind her as she struggled to walk faster than she should, breathing heavily and cupping the bottom of her rounded belly with both hands.

"Stop trying to walk so fast! You're straining yourself! " he called out from behind her, and she ignored him.

The next half hour passed in silence save for the sound of the forest around them as both traipsed through the undergrowth, feet looking for purchase amongst the myriad of bushes and brambles mixed with fallen leaves, roots and low-hanging vines. Her brain was firing in a million different directions, from fear to anger to disgust to regret... it was if her body was running the full gamut of emotions all within the space of time it took them to walk in fretful silence from the base to the tree. They were just nearing the shimmering field of gold when Poe spoke again.

"Look, I know you're angry with me for changing the plans without Leia's approval, but I won't let you do this alone," Poe said, and she stopped, turning around to face him. He held out his hands in front of him as if to prove that he was unarmed.

"You can't stop me," Serela shot back, wincing her face in pain as she struggled not to cry. The hot tears surfaced as she hastened to wipe them away with the back of her sleeve, Poe still approaching warily.

"He could hurt you," his soothing voice was trying to calm her, but she was terrified.

"Yes, he _could_ hurt me, but he'll _definitely_ hurt you if you try to come with me. He's expecting me to come alone!" Her eyes darted around frantically, already scanning the area for signs of him.

"This is beyond foolish Serela, you're weeks away from giving birth, you're being hunted like an animal by people who only want you for the baby growing inside you, and now you're elevating your past relationship with some guy over your personal safety now!"

Serela wanted to retort back that her past relationship with 'some guy' was the entire reason she had this baby to begin with, but then she considered that he would find some way to turn that around on her and instead she stormed onward to the field, the spidery branches of the tree's shadow coming into view.

They had just cleared through a particularly dense patch of trees when Serela stopped just short of the forest's edge. Closing her eyes, she searched the Force for Kylo's presence, seeking it out to know if he was here. She thought she would feel him already, but there was nothing. Just the sound of birds above and the rustle of the grain. Then there was the sudden pull of Poe's hand on her wrist, imploring her to turn around and listen to him.

"Serela! Please! Don't be like this!" his fingers were caressing her wrist in comfort and she felt the baby begin to hiccup.

"You shouldn't be here," she reproached him, and his other hand came up to caress her other wrist. "I couldn't let you come out here and face this alone," he whispered.

More tears clouded her eyes and the baby's hiccups left her stomach twitching as she scrunched up her face against the wave of grief and fear threatening to wash over her and drown her in it's depths. Poe's hand crept further up her arm and he stepped in closer, "Let me help you."

There was no warning, no indication that Kylo was close. His arrival felt like a freight train in her head-when she felt it, he was already so close that his presence could be felt, seen, heard- it was potent in every possible sense as it assaulted her mind.

Poe was suddenly writhing on the ground, his hands trying to pry away unseen fingers squeezing his throat. A look over her shoulder revealed Kylo, clothed head to toe in black with that menacing mask over his face, his arm and fingers outstretched pointing at the choking pilot on the ground.

"WHAT. MAKES. YOU. THINK. YOU. CAN. TOUCH. HER?" his voice shook like thunder and she felt the entirety of the forest quaking with his possessive rage. Without thinking twice she knelt next to Poe's thrashing form as the air was slowly being forced out of his lungs.

"KYLO STOP!" she screamed and looked at him with frantic pleading eyes. Her fingers trying to cloy at the invisible hands around Poe's throat- his face beginning to turn blue. Summoning all her power at once, she held out her hand to Kylo and expelled the power within her, sending Kylo stumbling backwards only a few meager steps before he collapsed on the forest floor with a thud, but the sound of Poe's resumed breathing told her it had been enough.

Kylo was on his feet in a moment, brushing himself off and making straight for them. Serela stood up, wobbling, and held out her hand as a threat. "LEAVE HIM," she demanded, and her voice sounded powerful, as though it were not really her speaking. It was enough to stop Kylo in his tracks, his mask cocked to the side and he tried to decipher whether it was worth it to try and kill this man again.

Serela stepped forward to him, and when she spoke her voice was its usual tone, "Leave him alone Kylo, he's not the one you came here for."

"True, but he had his hands on what's mine. That's not something I take lightly."

"Kylo..." she started, shoulders slumping in frustration, "Please let's not start like this."

"This started a long time ago Serela, I'm just here to finish it." His hands clamped around her wrists and she tried to yank them away but he held fast, "You're coming back with me—you better lay back down pretty boy before I finish what I was doing to you!" he called over Serela's shoulder and she heard Poe's raspy voice, "S-Serela."

Kylo bumped her shoulder as he stepped forward to confront him, "This doesn't concern you pilot, you're lucky I'm letting you live after the spectacle I just witnessed. What makes you think you can touch a woman pregnant with a child that isn't yours?" his mechanical voice sounded almost hysterical, hissing on almost every syllable as he spoke through the mouthpiece. Kylo released one of her hands so he could stoop down and pull Poe up by the front of his jumpsuit, shaking him. "What makes you think she wanted your hands on her?"

Poe was dazed from his near-suffocation and now it was Serela's turn to tug at Kylo, "Stop it Kylo, let him go. It's me you're here for, me and our son. Please release him." Her words sounded calm but through their bond in the Force he could hear how fast her heart was beating.

Wordlessly, Kylo released him and Poe's body felt back onto the mossy knoll, head thumping against the ground.

"KYLO!" she remonstrated him, yanking his sleeve harder as she tried to pull him away from Poe.

When he turned back to her his arms reached around and pulled her to his body, his hold on her felt desperate. They stood there like that- the sound of his mechanical breathing mixed with Serela's anxious heartbeat and her body crushed to his. Even though she couldn't see his face, she could feel the intangible pull between them, the excited motions of the baby at the feel of his father next to him at last, and the palpable fear emanating from Kylo at the thought of losing her again.

Serela reached up both hands and Kylo let her; his hold on her was too solid for her to get away from him even if that was her desire. Instead she placed her palms on either side of his helmet and lifted it up, revealing Kylo's sickly pale, sweaty face underneath. His eyes stared at her hungrily, and she was vaguely aware of the sight of Poe just behind Kylo. He was sitting up watching the situation unfurl, a dumbfounded look of horror on his face. Although it pained her to think of what she had to say to him, Serela managed to find the words.

"Go back Poe, I'm staying here."

Kylo stiffened but relaxed when he understood the weight of her words. Poe shook his head as Kylo's turned towards him, ready to ensure that his chief competition really did follow through on Serela's directive.

"You don't mean that Serela," he sputtered, his face reddening as he clambered to his feet.

"I do. I've made my choice. You need to go back."

"There has to be another way."

"There isn't. This is the path I choose. I choose Kylo."

"B-but..."

"YOU HEARD HER!" Kylo shouted at him, and Serela cupped his face softly with her hands, turning it back to face her. "Shh," she soothed him, "I'm still here, you don't need to worry."

Mollified, Kylo's hands rubbed her back, gliding up and down her spine in graceful strokes, distracting her from the scene with Poe. She quivered under his touch and closed her eyes as he brought up a hand to her cheek, his favourite form of chaste affection. When she looked back at Poe his wounded expression told her this would be something that haunted him for a long time to come.

"Please go," she quietly implored him once more, and this time he did. Poe turned around and trooped through the dense patch of trees like it was a prison trying to hold him in. Arms thrashing wildly he ripped at every branch he could reach, rending them from their trunks as he passed and paying no heed to the scrapes he sustained. It took only minutes for the noise of his exertions to fade in the distance, and Serela felt Kylo's other hand on her face drawing her back to the present.

"You'll stay with me?" he asked, and she saw in his eyes the same candle she had thought long extinguished, inside him she felt the same flicker she had seen briefly after his reconditioning, and her heart leapt in hope that what Kalonia had proposed was true, that they could bring him back to her, to all of them.

"Yes," she promised, and reached up to take his hands, placing them on her belly, "He needs both of us." The golden field lay behind her while the sun glowing through the trees warmed her body and her heart as she stood here with him, and she knew deep down that her words were true, both those spoken and left unsaid. She would stay with him, now and forever. There would never be another for her, even if she had wanted it to be so. Her life, her love, her fate all rested on the shoulders of this man in her arms, and the proof of their shared love growing inside of her.

The moisture appeared in both of their eyes simultaneously. Kylo gazed down at her rounded stomach, the evidence of their connection for life. He needed her, oh how he needed her more than he could have ever realized. She was his sun in the midst of so much darkness, his lighthouse in a storm.

Before she could react his hands were on her cheeks again pulling her face to his. Their lips met and it was like the ground quaked with the energy of it. Her body was singing as he wrapped his arms around her and she fisted her hands into his hair, trying to draw him in even more. The familiar, painful ache between her legs she had been waking up to for weeks returned with a vengeance and she clenched her thighs together, trying to resist the urge to let him take her here on the forest floor.

If she hadn't kissed him, Kylo told himself later, he never would have allowed himself to be snuck up on. As it happened, with Poe's departure Luke, Finn and Rey had approached, followed closely by Dr. Kalonia and two more medics, the physician's finger flicking the syringe in her hand. Serela and Kylo were so caught up in the heat of the moment that they never heard Rey's tentative footsteps, tiptoeing up behind Kylo's back. In her mind, Serela could hear Luke speaking only to her, _**Keep him distracted a little bit longer**_ and she pulled out the greatest weapon she could think of.

Suddenly Kylo's mind was assaulted with images. Memories of their past liaisons, his sweaty, muscular body pounding into hers as he took her from on top, behind, and every way in between. Some of it was memory, others were dreams that she'd had over the weeks, fantasies which played out in her mind every night as she dreamed of him taking her and claiming her body once more. He growled into her mouth with the onslaught of images she was giving him, there was no room for any other cognitive thought. His hands groped her wildly and he moaned into her mouth, the hardness of his body straining against hers.

It wasn't until a second before Rey struck that Kylo broke his face away from Serela for air and heard the sound of a twig snapping behind him.

He turned around too late and Rey had already stabbed him in the neck with the needle, dispensing the powerful serum directly into his bloodstream. He had the sentience to blast her backward, but only a few feet before he slumped to his knees, looking up at Serela in confusion and fear, his hand reaching up to cup her cheek.

"I'm sorry Kylo," she sobbed, bending down to kiss his forehead, "It was the only way."

As the darkness in the corners of his mind began to close in with the effects of the serum, he slipped into unconsciousness with his last thought being that the serum had been lethal, and she had allowed the Resistance to kill him.

 _Author's Note: Holyyyyyy crap. You guys. Seriously. 25,000 views? 90 reviews? Whoa._

 _Okay, so here's the deal. I've got another 6-7 ish (poss 8) chapters left to go. 6 of those are already drafted and in various stages of completion. I hope you were satisfied with how the 'reunion' went between the two of them. Don't worry I won't drag it out too much between when they're reunited again, but it is going to take some time to filter that stuff out of him and who knows what the result will be?_ ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 _Also, for those holding out here mostly for the smut, there will be at least one more smut scene coming (not saying with whom) but if you're reading this exclusively waiting for more smut... hang in there, it will come (no pun intended) eventually. LOL._

 _Lastly, I need advice. I'm already at 105,000 words which based on my online research is way too long for a novel, especially if I was to ever try and get published (not saying I would publish this for obvious reasons but if I try to write my own original work after this I'm concerned I would run into the same problem of not being able to condense.) Do YOU as the readers feel like the story is too long or there were/are things that could have been cut? I've tried my best to only put in those things which serve to advance the plot but if I try to write my own book after this (I can't emphasize enough that I've never written this much of anything before) I'm worried I'll run into the same problem of being too long-winded. Anyhow, thoughts and opinions are most welcome! Also, if and when I try to write my own original stuff, would anyone be interested in reading that, or are you mostly interested in the Star Wars aspect? I'll be honest I don't think I have another one of these in me since this one has taken so much of my time, although there's no telling what inspiration I'll get from the next movie ;)_


	39. XXXIX The Birth

"Supreme Leader," Hux's voice was remarkably amiable considering the news he was about to deliver, "It appears our Kylo Ren-"

"Has been taken, yes," Snoke's perceptive eyes watched Hux with suspicion.

It didn't seem as though Hux was surprised that Snoke already knew. His arms were behind his back, hands clasped together as he replied with mock sincerity, "Of course we had hoped for better from him, I believe the way forward is clear now."

"Is it?" Snoke seethed from atop his throne.

"My Lord although it gives me no great pleasure to say this, it appears the Resistance was more than prepared for Kylo Ren's arrival, they apprehended and somehow managed to overpower him within an hour of his arrival on D'Qar. I feel-"

"It is _that GIRL_ ," Snoke's voice shook the room with it's venom.

"Yes, Supreme Leader, it's as I feared. We do not know whether he was taken willingly or by force because he was so adamant about going alone. All we know is that he has disappeared and it has been hours since we last heard from him, therefore there can only be one assumption."

Snoke waved his hand dismissively and looked down at Hux, "Whether they took him or he went of his own free will, our next course of action remains the same."

Hux's hungry eyes looked up at the hologram like a doting child with its father. His expression was one of cautious optimism, and Snoke finally said the words he had been hinting towards.

"Withdraw the troops back on board and prepare the serum. We will wait out the month's time for it to take effect, then when you are ready we will strike hard and end this once and for all. I myself will journey to the Finalizer to attend this invasion."

The red-haired man's eyes widened in understanding and he hastily bowed down on one knee, "M-My Lord," he stuttered.

"Yes... I've left this alone for too long in the hands of others. It is time I came in person to set right this chain of events."

* * *

Transporting Kylo back to the base had been a hurried and nerve-racking excursion. They moved as one huge group, Kylo still sedated and being carried between Finn and one of the orderlies. Upon getting him into the base itself they had rushed him down the hallways to the medical bay, where immediately Dr. Kalonia set up a constant stream of sedation into his bloodstream, explaining that they would have to essentially put him in a coma for the amount of time it would take to transfuse his blood, as well as to keep him from waking up. The hustle and bustle of the room was overwhelming as the doctor barked out orders to her team and they grappled with Kylo's robes to strip him of the unnecessary layers and don his body in the traditional hospital gown. After completing that task they strapped him into the bed they had laid out for him as tightly as they dared.

Serela turned away from the sight of his long, pale body stretched out on the metal bed, each of his climbs encased in an elaborate set of restraints. His dark, shaggy hair spread out on the starched white pillow beneath his head, the lanky strands still greasy from sweating inside his helmet.

She and the other three observers stood back from the hubbub, trying to watch without being an encumbrance to the process. Serela observed it all with tearful eyes, trying not to get in the way but wanting to stand beside the bed and clutch his hand in hers as proof that it was really him; he was real and he was here at last.

All of her thoughts and concerns seemed to fly at her at once. Worried about Kylo, about Poe, about everything, Serela grabbed Finn's arm and asked him, "Where is Poe now?"

Finn's eyes narrowed and he looked down at her in bewildered confusion, "I have no idea Serela, why?"

Rey sensed the importance though and took Serela's hand, her mind requesting permission to see what the source of her turmoil was. She saw the scene in the woods, with Poe trying to persuade her to stay behind, and to be with him, and her refusal before Kylo's interruption. Rey saw how Serela had been forced to crush Poe, breaking his heart as she openly chose Kylo right in front of him, even though it was in order to save his life.

"C'mon!" Rey pulled Serela with her and Finn followed behind them with no clue where they were going. Setting off towards the control room Rey called out for Poe through the hallways yet receiving no response.

Serela sent a message to Luke back in the medical bay, **_Please stay with him until I get back_** and heard his answer in the affirmative.

The first contraction came just as they were passing the cafeteria, a deep, shuddering pain ran through her and she paused to lean against the wall with one arm and cradle her stomach with the other.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Finn asked, his voice panicked. He didn't have a lot of experience with women and babies, but he knew enough to be concerned when he saw a heavily pregnant woman doubled over in pain.

"I'm fine," she gasped after a minute as the cramps subsided and she could straighten up again.

"Ohhhhh no you're not," Finn insisted, his hands on her back. Rey was worried now too, and she put her hands on Serela's belly, feeling the baby's erratic movements.

"Is it time? Is he coming?" she asked, biting her lip in nervous anticipation.

"No," Serela shook her head, "He's not due for another month, it has to be just a false alarm."

Rey scrutinised Serela's face for hints that she was lying. A lame grin forced its way onto Serela's face to reassure both of them there was no way the baby was coming yet. It wasn't time enough for him to be ready. No, even if he wanted to she had to keep him in for another month, it wouldn't be safe for him to come this early.

Whatever Rey was searching for to alleviate her fears she didn't find it. "Right then," she demanded, "We're taking you back to the medical bay."

Serela protested and tried to refuse, but her tired, shaky legs could not hold out and eventually she they gave way just as Finn caught her before she hit the floor, her body spent in exhaustion.

"C'mon," Rey's voice was nervous but authoritative, "Up you get then. We're taking you back and then we'll find Poe and bring him to you."

Her feeble attempts to disagree with them went unheeded as each slung one of her arms over their shoulders, half- carrying her body back in the direction they had just come from.

"What's happened?" they heard Leia's frantic voice as they crossed an intersecting hallway, and Serela looked to her left to find Leia with Poe and two others she did not recognise. Rushing forward Leia's soft, motherly hands stroked Serela's cheeks and she lifted her sagging head to look into her eyes. "What's wrong?" she asked, eyes wild now with fear.

"Nothing," Serela mumbled weakly, and she dimly saw Poe step towards and then behind her. Rey and Finn both released her and she sagged towards the floor, only to be caught by Poe as he swung her into his arms, her head lolling onto his shoulder.

"We're taking her back to the medical bay," Rey explained rapidly, "We were trying to find Poe and she starting feeling pain then her legs sort of gave out."

"Pain?" Poe asked in alarm, "What kind of pain? The baby kind of pain?"

Thankfully Leia took charge as the atmosphere began to feel panicked, "Let's go," she demanded, pointing the direction they had already been heading.

Serela was humiliated yet again. She had broken Poe's heart an hour before and now here he was carrying her limp body through the base while her baby's father lay unconscious in a hospital bed nearby, fighting for the ability to return to her.

Poe's strong arms never seemed to tire of carrying her and she started to feel a bit more clear-headed, asking him to let her down several times which he always ignored and continued walking in silence.

 _So he's still angry then._

He didn't set her down on her feet until they finally reached the doors to the medical bay, allowing her to walk the final steps by herself as he brushed past, Rey and Finn retaking their place on either side of her in case she needed more support.

Dr. Kalonia looked up from a desk she was sitting at with piles of charts and graphs on top of paperwork and stood immediately, coming around the desk and rushing to Serela's side.

"What's wrong?" she asked, noting Serela's pale face as Poe walked away from her in a huff.

"Nothin-" she started to answer, only to be wracked with another contraction. "Nnnnnhhh!" she groaned, trying to breathe through the pain as Finn and Rey held her arms in case she should collapse again. A sudden burst of liquid between her legs seemed to gush out of her and she felt the uncomfortable sensation of wetting her pants.

The doctor didn't waste anytime. "Your water's broken. You. In a bed. Now." and she ushered the two alongside Serela to help her into one of the empty rooms in the hall behind her desk.

Leia and Poe followed, the others who had been with Leia in the hallway were sent to inform Statura and find Luke. By the time Dr. Kalonia had helped Finn and Rey hoist Serela onto the bed the pain had passed and she leaned her head back against the mattress, trying hard to regulate her breathing again.

"How long ago was her first contraction?" Kalonia asked Rey and Finn. "Oh! Uhh..." Finn spluttered, while Rey answered quickly, "About 20 minutes ago."

"Good, that's normal spacing for contractions in the beginning. In the next hour or so they should hopefully start coming closer together as the body prepares itself for the birth."

"What? NO! I can't have this baby now! It's too early!" Serela protested, trying to sit up on the bed before Finn's hand on her shoulder pushed her gently back down.

The doctor frowned, "I'm sorry to tell you this Serela but you don't have much of a choice. Your baby is coming now whether you want him to or not."

Her mouth agape, Serela tried hard not to panic, that would be no good for anyone involved in this mess of a situation. Sympathetically, Dr. Kalonia patted her hand, "It's not unheard of for a baby to come this early, and with a little extra supervision he should be just fine. What's important right now is that you take care of yourself, and in doing so take care of him. Now first, I'm going to need some help getting you out of these clothes and into a hospital gown."

"I'll go find Reha," Poe spoke quietly, and slipped out before Serela could object and ask him to send someone else. Finn told them he would wait outside to debrief Luke if he arrived while they were helping Serela to change.

Wildly, Serela looked at each of their faces before fixating on the only maternal figure she could find in the room at that moment, "LEIA? Leia I'm so scared!" she blurted out abruptly as Kalonia retrieved the robe from a closet and Rey began helping to remove her shoes.

"I know you are dear," Leia comforted her, stroking the hair on the crown of her head, "I know you are. It's going to be alright."

"B-but, Kylo-"

Leia's serious eyes bore into Serela's, "You've done everything you can for my son at the moment dear, right now it's time for you to do everything you can for yours."

Fresh tears came as Rey peeled off her socks and Kalonia worked to unbutton Serela's pants. Together both women took hold of a pant leg and pulled down, while Leia helped her sit up long enough to remove her top layers too. Within 5 minutes the three women had completely stripped her and covered her in the robe, her huge belly looking comically bigger now under the pale blue fabric.

It wasn't long after that Reha arrived, taking in the situation and rushing to her daughter's side. Dr. Kalonia disappeared briefly then came back with her clipboard, coming to sit on the foot of Serela's hospital bed as she checked her blood pressure and pulse.

"All vitals look good," she murmured, making notations on the chart as Leia and Reha each took one of her hands, "Now to see how dialated you are."

Serela tried not to flinch when the doctor poked her head under the sheet that covered most of her legs and abdomen, "You're at 4 centimeters already, which is good, because we don't have the equipment to give you an epidural, so let's hope for a short labour," she explained apologetically.

Before she could answer Serela felt another contraction coming and she braced herself, gritting her teeth and digging her feet into the bed as she worked to alleviate some of the pain. When it passed she lay still, gasping for air as the two woman on either side of her looked on in sympathy.

"Well," Kalonia spoke again, looking at her watch, "That one was only 15 minutes after the last, so already you're progressing splendidly. If we're lucky you might be ready to push in an hour or so."

"AN HOUR OR SO?" Serela shouted, and Reha shushed her. "We birth quickly in our family child, an hour or so is nothing compared to some women."

Leia chuckled at that, "I was in labour with Ben for 16 hours. Han said he thought it would never end," her wistful smile turned sad, "He was such a loud little thing too. Came out squawking like a parrot almost immediately."

Serela couldn't help but laugh at the comparison, and it seemed to relieve her some. The next 2 hours passed by with Leia and Reha swapping humourous stories of their children's antics in days long past. The contractions continued coming, and closer together each time, but with two veterans coaching her through them Serela felt more confident in her ability to handle the pain, both current and what was to come.

When they seemed engrossed enough Kalonia slipped away again, this time promising to return shortly. She omitted explaining to them that she was stepping out to check in on the progress of Kylo, still strapped into his bed; body unresponsive. Two medical assistants were in the room so he could be monitored at all times, and when she arrived they informed the doctor that he had not stirred once since being brought it.

Relieved, Kalonia picked up his long, pale wrist to check his pulse, the tempo was normal.

A scream erupted down the hall and Kalonia recognised it as Serela's voice. As she turned to leave the room and run to her aid, Kylo twitched. Alarmed, the doctor checked his wrist again and noted that his pulse seemed to have quickened. Another scream- suddenly his body started to jolt erratically. Both of the medical assistants came forward to see what was happening, noting how the muscles in his neck twitched in a way they hadn't been minutes before. The screaming deepened and his body began to thrash, eyes still closed as his limbs struggled against the restraints in response to her cries.

Torn between concern for both patients, Kalonia finally told them, "Hold him down and increase the sedation, but not much more, or you'll kill him,otherwise just keep him from hurting himself or waking up!" before rushing out the door.

The volume and severity of her screams didn't just bring Kalonia running. Poe had been sitting in the waiting room of the medical bay, watching Rey and Finn take turns dozing on each other's shoulders. Luke had come and gone, having been alerted and updated about her condition he opted to retire to his chambers until the baby arrived. When Poe heard Serela's wails he was just beginning to doze off himself, his head leaned back against the smudged walls of the waiting room, eyes half-lidded and sleepy. Her scream woke him with a start, and he paused, waiting to see if he had dreamed it. The next scream came and he was on his feet in an instant, rushing down the hallway and throwing open the door to her room, the Dr. Kalonia not far behind him.

"POE!" Leia spoke harshly, "This is not the place for you right now!" Instead of listening he purposefully diverted his eyes away from the sheet that was tented over her legs, careful to avoid seeing anything as he stepped closer.

"No, don't... I want him to stay for a minute..." Serela breathed heavily, her voice weak and pitiful, "Can we have a few minutes alone?"

Reha and Leia looked at her belly warily, then at each other.

"Your contractions are very close love..." Reha's voice trailed off as she looked down to Kalonia who had strode over and sat down on a chair at the foot of the bed, where she was now peering underneath the sheet.

"Almost 10 centimeters, you'll have to make it quick," she warned, "This baby won't wait too much longer."

Hesitantly, Leia stood and made for the door, Reha followed. Dr. Kalonia looked up at Serela, arching her eyebrows as if to ask whether she was expected to leave too. Serela shook her head 'no' then held out her hand to Poe pleadingly, begging him with her eyes to take it.

The poor man stepped closer, his rough, calloused fingers wrapping loosely around her small, fragile ones. The look he gave her was one of so many mixed emotions, but the most predominant one she could see was hurt. 'I'm listening' his eyes seemed to say.

Serela tried to say everything she wanted to before the next wave of pain seized her, "Poe, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, please forgive me AAAHH!" she cried out in the grips of another contraction, squeezing his hand for support. His stern face gave way to concern and he brushed the hair out of her eyes, giving small shushing noises as he attempted to soothe her.

"P-p-please P-Poe! P-Please f-forgive me," she begged when the contraction abated slightly, her voice still unsteady.

Just as he was about to respond, Serela turned to the side, trying (and failing) to avoid his feet, as she vomited all over the floor.

The experience brought to mind the moment she had done almost the same thing to Hux that first day he had tortured her, and she felt the bile rise in her throat again at the memory. Poe stepped aside from the sticky mess on the floor and leaned down until he was close enough to her ear to whisper, "I do forgive you Serela. For everything. _Now stop worrying and have this baby_."

A groan escaped her at the start of another contraction and she tried to smile up at him, sniffling and crying her way through the pain as it escalated excruciatingly slowly, then crested and began its descent back down while it gathered strength to rear itself again.

"Alright Poe, you need to go back to the waiting room. Don't be alarmed by the screams, it's normal for a woman giving birth. Send her mother and the general back in please on your way out!"

With one last worried look at her Poe left, Reha and Leia reentering and quickly resuming their places beside Serela. They wove their hands into hers and Reha whispered, "Soon love, not much longer until you can push him."

Her screams echoed off the walls of the room, and unbeknownst to her, with every shriek Kylo's body down the hallway thrashed harder against the restraints, as if he were unconsciously still trying to get up and be present at the birth of his son.

The contractions were so close now, there was barely anytime between them as Serela tried to conserve her energy and not scream anymore - knowing she would need all of it she could for the final stage of this labourious process. Mercifully, Dr. Kalonia looked up from above the sheet and spoke the words she had been longing to hear: "Serela! It's time to push now! I can see the baby's head and he's ready to come out but you need to push him!" Kalonia's voice was steady but urgent, and with the instinct of millions of first time mothers who had gone before her, Serela tried to bear down and help give her baby the motion he needed to finally exit her body.

"That's it," Kalonia's hands were on her knees, spreading her legs apart further as she watched the baby's progress while he slowly emerged, the visible head growing larger and larger.

Serela screamed with the pain of it, sure that she was being torn in half starting at the apex of her thighs, and both grandmothers clung to one of her hands with both of theirs, offering their encouragement and assurance.

"You can do it love."

"Just a little bit more."

"You're doing great."

"Only a few more pushes sweetheart."

With one final, heart-wrenching scream, Serela gave her last and hardest push, bearing down with all the energy she could feel left in her body, and forcing it to move through her and grant her son his release at last.

Moments later, another scream, this time the nasal wail of an infant, his body covered in a white substance as he opened his mouth in another screech at being evicted from his first home.

Serela sobbed hard, uncontrollable sobs. They wracked through her body as the doctor smiled over the sheet at her and held the squalling child up so the women could see him fully- all three blubbering worse than him.

"Serela, you have a son," she announced proudly, "Reha, General; your grandson."

The three women wept as Kalonia wrapped him in a small white blanket, placing him in his mother's waiting arms. Reha kissed her daughter's forehead and then the top of his. Leia simply clung to Serela's hand and stared at him, tears streaming from her eyes as she too, recalled the moment she had first held her son in her arms.

"He looks just like him," she bawled when Serela encouraged her to hold him, and Kalonia slipped out of the room to give them privacy, as well as to prevent any others from intruding upon the General's uncharacteristic show of deep emotion.

"My Ben, my Ben, my Ben... he looks exactly like him," Leia gazed down in grief and wonder at the child she held. Her flesh and blood, made half from her and Han... no, she could not think of him now. It was too painful. Instead she concentrated on the tiny mouth which pursed its lips as small eyes surveyed her, his miniature fingers wrapping around her thumb.

Serela and Reha watched her with smiles, understanding the significance of the moment better than Leia would think. When she finally handed her grandson back to his mother, she wiped her face with the back of her sleeve and used a box of tissues on the table beside the bed to blow her nose. After that, she returned to her calm, collected self.

Reha held him next, cooing and stroking the side of his face with her index finger, nuzzling him to her chest, letting his head rest beneath her chin. At last, after both grandmothers had had their moment to bond with him, Serela held her son close to her, staring into his eyes for what felt like years as she memorised every inch of his face, watching with fascination every movement and expression as he stared back at her, his creamy white skin wrinkled in concentration as he scrutinised everything.

A knock at the door preceded Rey poking her head in, and, upon Serela's invitation to enter, almost skipped over to the bed, Finn right behind her as they both leaned down to look at the youngest member of the Resistance.

Others came and went, and eventually Kalonia came and swept up the baby to take him to be cleaned up, promising it would only be a few minutes. Leia had followed her, seemingly unwilling to let her grandson out of her sight for even a moment. Not 10 minutes later she had returned with him in her arms, beaming as she gave him back to Serela.

"I wish Kylo was here," Serela murmured to her only once, when there was a small enough crowd in the room and Rey was holding the baby at the foot of the bed so that everyone else was distracted with him.

"I know," Leia whispered, eyes beginning to brim with tears again which she quickly pushed away, "I do too."

It was late when finally all visitors had come and gone and only the three women remained again. Another bed had been produced for Reha to sleep on, but when the offer of a second one was suggested for Leia, she declined, saying she would prefer the solitude of her own room after such a long day, but really longing for the moment when she could finally be alone with her thoughts and cry in private.

On her way out after holding him one last time for the night, Leia stopped in the doorway and took one last longing look at her new grandson, nestled safely in his mother's arms. "You still haven't decided what his name is, have you?" she asked her.

"Oh yes! I forgot to tell you that I have. It's Ben. Benjamin Han Solo."

* * *

 _Author's Note: Well there you have it! The Chosen one has arrived! Lemme tell you, I once again had to do a lot of basic research for this one (as a non-medical professional and also a woman who has never gone through the agony of childbirth.) If I made any mistakes in the timing or you think it was unrealistic in any way please let me know, but I felt like it was a natural thing that the stress of so much happening would eventually lead her to having an early delivery, especially after what she just went through in the previous chapter. In the next one I will already tell you that you WILL see Kylo in case you're worried I'll drag that out another 10 chapters or so LOL. So there you have it, here's another early weekend present (since my in-laws are flying in for a weeklong visit on Sunday I wanted to 'birth' this chapter before my manic cleaning phase takes effect. Can't let my MIL know we actually live like clutter-slobs when she's not around ;) Hope everyone has a great weekend! Leave your feedback pls as per usual :) :D :) :D_


	40. XXXX The Awakening

She was home, lying in her bed with Kylo next to her, their legs and arms tangled in each other as they lay panting from their recent exertion, Kylo smiling at her and rolling over to kiss her.

"You make me feel like a different person," he confessed, stroking her cheek. "When I'm with you it's like all the pieces in my life that never fit anywhere else finally have a place. Here. With you."

Serela woke from her dream. It had been a memory-an imprint in her self conscious of happier times-however brief they had been.

Nestled in her arms, his warm cheeks snug against her chest, was their son. The result of those same times she dreamed about and remembered. Gingerly, she turned him towards her more so she could lay on her side and face him as he slept on peacefully. Miraculously, he had started sleeping through the night almost immediately, a fact that astounded both of his grandmother's, especially Leia, who informed her that Kylo had kept her awake for hours almost every night for the better part of his first 2 years. In the weeks that had followed his birth, Serela and Leia had grown even closer. The unexplained withdrawal of the First Order troops and any immediate threats to security for the time being had left her with more free time to spend in the medical bay with Serela and her grandson, as well as checking in on the progress of her son.

Owing to his early arrival and low birth weight, Dr. Kalonia had opted to keep both Serela and the baby under her direct care for the foreseeable future. Once his weight was up, she said they would be able to return to the room she had shared with her mother. Until then, Serela entertained a constant stream of visitors in her room in the medical bay. Rey and Finn came at least twice a day, Leia as often as she could. Luke was more unpredictable, sometimes he came once a day, other times he might come 5. It was always without warning, though his visits were always welcome. Poe was the least regular of all of them, in the 4 weeks since Ben had been born, he had only been by to see them a handful of times. Each visit he always made an excuse about being busy with training the more inexperienced pilots or running drills with Snap Wexley, but Rey told her in muted tones one evening that his general demeanor had changed. Instead of the cheerful, likable Poe Dameron everyone had been used to, they were usually met with his sullen, withdrawn twin.

She tried to stuff away her guilt over how much a role she played in that change, but took the advice of everyone to leave it alone, accept that he likely visited as much as he could bear to, and concentrate on her son.

All her questions for Dr. Kalonia about Kylo were met with vague answers.

"How is he?"

"Still the same."

"Do you need more of my blood?"

"We already took half a pint 3 days ago Serela, we can't take anymore from you right now."

Frustrated, Serela had been tempted to push herself out of this bed and go find him herself. It was the medical bay after all, how far could he be? When she expressed this to Reha and Luke however, they quickly hastened to change her mind, "Kylo is no longer here in the medical bay, love," Reha's words were a shock to her.

"Where is he then?"

Luke answered her, "He's been taken deeper underground within the base to remove more of the threat should he awake and the serum has not worked as we intended."

"When will we know if it's worked though?"

"When Dr. Kalonia and her team believe that we have done the best that we can for him."

Now even more exasperated with the vague answers, Serela glanced down at the small face of her son, his shock of dark hair soft to the touch and she nuzzled the top of his head, noting the way his frail hands grabbed for her cheeks.

"He needs to see his father," she mumbled tearfully.

Luke was standing at the foot of the bed, watching her but saying nothing. She knew he was likely not the person in charge of the big decisions like this, he was merely an informant this time. If she wanted to get to see Kylo, she would need Leia or Dr. Kalonia to assent, which was unlikely.

She tried very hard to be patient, but still broached the subject with each of them during their next visit to her room.

Leia deflected the questions, "I'm not sure," she said, "About when he will wake up. That is a question for Dr. Kalonia."

Yet when Serela asked Kalonia she received her blasé responses again. Still, she asked everyday, waiting for a different reply, hoping that this would be the day they decided to wake him.

Dr. Kalonia had come in smiling, which wasn't out of the ordinary, but today she walked in with an unusually sunny disposition considering the serious nature of the dangers that were still all around them, simply hanging over their heads indefinitely until the First Order decided to strike again.

Serela's eyes widened hopefully at Kalonia's expression, and she held her breath, not even bothering to ask the questions she had plagued her with everyday for weeks, because this time there was no need. The doctor opened her mouth to speak, and finally said the words Serela had been waiting for.

"We are beginning to wake him up."

* * *

When Kylo woke, he was strapped down to a gurney by his arms and legs, hands and feet too. His insides felt as if they were on fire, though not in an unpleasant way, and he opened his eyes to see the dim lighting in the medical bay he was being held in, noting that he had been left in an almost empty room with nothing in sight to use as a weapon. He searched within himself for the same sense of cold, dark purpose and found it, but barely. There inside him was a small black ball of energy, and it held steady in tandem with another orb. This second one was bright though, and glowed with a powerful energy that almost overshadowed the ball of darkness opposing it. Feeling almost like there was a scale inside of him, he looked and saw that the dark orb and the light one were almost equal, as though there was a balance to him that had not been there before. It seemed as if his whole body was glowing, his veins thrummed with some unknown energy and he there was a lightness to his spirit he had not felt in many years.

 _Serela! Where was she? The baby!_

Before he could begin to get himself worked up the only door in the room swung open, admitting an older woman, probably his mother's age, with short hair and a wrinkled face. She wore a white lab coat and a stern expression.

"Good morning," she said, stopping a few feet away from him.

"Is it? I can't tell from in here."

She did not take the bait from his subtle dig and instead told him, "You'll be kept down here until we feel confident you can be trusted."

"Fine. Why am I strapped down like a lab rat?" he asked conversationally, as though this were a normal thing for him.

"We determined that the best way to protect you from yourself and us from you was to have you restrained until we could be sure you would not pose a threat to anyone here on D'Qar."

"So you've done some experiments on me then? I can feel a drastic difference already, what is it you did?"

"During your reconditioning the First Order implanted a chip in your shoulder close to the neck. This chip kept you flooded with mind-altering drugs regularly and upped your dosage when it sensed your commitment to the Dark side was waning. We're still unsure of all the technology behind it but we removed the chip and have sent it off for testing, in the meantime we gave you a blood transfusion."

"Transfusion?" he asked surprised, "I didn't think I lost that much."

"The purpose of the transfusion was not merely to replenish the blood you lost, but also the flush whatever remaining chemicals we could from your bloodstream, and hopefully remove the traces of the First Order's control over you."

"So you hoped to bring me back to the Light side?"

"More or less yes, although we had no idea if it would work or how successful it would be."

"And who supplied the blood necessary for this transfusion," he asked, yawning as though already bored.

"That would be Serela, the mother of your-"

Without warning his body began to rage against the restraints, thrashing and fighting against them as he tried to free himself.

"YOU...LET...HER...DO...WHAT?" he spoke so harsh and suddenly that spittle flew out with every word and flecks of it landed on her clipboard.

Dr. Kalonia looked at his face with pity and concern, "Serela was given the choice to help us try and save you - potentially bring you back to the Light side, and consequentially to her and your child."

Seething, Kylo twitched and convulsed on the gurney, looking at her with wild eyes as he tried to process what she was saying... Serela...had endangered her life and the baby's... to try and bring him back to the Light...

"You have a son," Dr. Kalonia told him suddenly, and after that all things ceased to be.

"He's here?" his voice changed suddenly and it was timid, almost fearful, "Where is he? Where are both of them? When can I see them?"

"When we are sure you do not pose any immediate threat to their safety," she informed him brusquely, and Kylo threw his head back against the pillow with a groan of defeat. His son... here... they had both made it through the birth safely...

"Will you tell Serela I want to see her?" he asked pleadingly, noting the doctor's stern expression.

"Serela would not be allowed to see you if she wanted to. She is under strict instruction not to leave her bed until I am satisfied she had fully recovered from the difficult birth. Moreover she would not be allowed to come to you until myself and the General feel it wise."

"The General..." his words trailed off, his brain going fuzzy again with the effect of the sedatives.

"Yes, I can see that you are falling back to sleep now, but she will be along soon to speak with you as well."

Kylo tried to say something else. He wanted to open his mouth to speak and tell the doctor that he knew who the general was, that he was no fool, and they would regret the decision to keep him from Serela and his newborn son. No words could come though, as he felt the cool sensation through his veins sending him back into a blissful, dreamless sleep.

When he came to again, Kylo jolted awake from the sound of a door closing forcefully, and raised his head to see her sitting at the foot of the gurney.

Time had aged her considerably, but the features were still the same. Her eyes, her nose, cheekbones and mouth; they all could belong to only one person, whom he had not set eyes on in 15 years. His mother.

"Hello my son," she spoke softly, her face reserved yet sad.

"Hello General."

Leia sighed as she came closer and pulled a chair up next to his bed, "Is that how we're going to begin? After all this time?"

"What other way is there to begin when you are keeping me from my son?"

"He is beautiful," she gushed, "He-He looks exactly like you."

Kylo tried to swallow the lump in his throat. "Bring him to me...please" he added pitifully.

Leia seemed to consider it for a moment but then shook her head, "Not yet," she told him, "We have to be sure he's safe around you."

Without thinking Kylo strained against his binding, veins bulging in his neck as he gritted his teeth against the furious words threatening to spill out. "Let...me...see...my...son..." he ordered her.

His mother stood, her eyes narrowed as she looked at him in sympathy, "You are **my** son. I would never deny you something you wanted unless it was for your good."

"I want to see him!" he yelled, and the pronouncement echoed around the room as he tried to calm his laboured breathing.

"Not. yet." she stated with definition, and without warning he felt his eyes clouded with tears.

"Please," he begged, "I need to see both of them."

"Soon," Leia promised him, her face more sympathetic than before, but still unwavering.

It was an almost comical scene: Kylo strapped to the gurney, drugged and helpless as his aging mother stood over him, completely in control of the situation.

"How long have I been out?" he asked, refusing to look at her.

"Just around a month."

"How long ago did she have the baby?"

Leia hesitated and he looked up at her, sensing she wasn't eager to answer this question.

Finally, she did, "Serela had the baby the same day we brought you here. The stress of the situation was too much and he came early, but he is fine. Just very small."

Kylo's heart thumped in his chest uneasily, knowing that the majority of the stress had come from him. His limbs flexed their muscles and rotated joints trying to stretch them and test the limitations of these restraints for any weaknesses. They would pay for trying to keep him away from his son and his... whatever term would best describe Serela. She was not his wife, but she was certainly not a prostitute or a concubine. She simply was who she was, and above all, she was his. That was all that mattered.

"I feel much different now," he tried to assure her, "Much lighter, like I'm more in control of myself."

His mother nodded but said nothing, choosing to study his face while he continued to avert her eyes, trying to stave off the moment when he would finally have to answer to her about what had happened with his father.

She didn't ask though, which puzzled him, instead she just stared and seemed to be waiting for him to bring it up, which he would not. He could not...

Leia cleared her throat like she was going to say something but then thought better of it and held off. Kylo's eyes flickered to her face and then looked away just as quickly. It was a strange standoff.

"How long until I can see them?"

Her eyes narrowed at him, knowing that while the question was genuine, he was trying to avoid speaking about Han. Frustrated, but knowing his stubbornness well, she replied, "As long as it takes for us to know they are safe."

* * *

There was Darkess. Only Darkness in the tidal pool of his mind, which fed into the deeper ocean of the Dark side and it in turn thrust back in waves, spilling more and more into him as he felt the levels rising.

Physical consciousness had so far eluded him, but as he felt the stirring of life in his body again he wondered to himself how long he had been asleep like this.

He could hear the sound of shuffling around him but still couldn't open his eyes yet to see. They were so heavy and the effects of the treatment were still so exhausting. He lay still and waited to see if the sensation would pass, and gradually it did.

"General Hux?" a soft female voice addressed him, and his muscles stirred. It felt like being underwater and trying to get to the surface but the weight of the water atop him was pushing him down, not ready to release him yet.

Aggravated, he pushing forward, using every ounce of energy he could muster to open his eyes, allowing the woman above him to come into sharper focus.

"General Hux?" she repeated, and he tried to sit up, but her hands on his chest gently pushed him back down.

A hand lashed out and grabbed her throat. Before she knew it her face was dangling above his, neck constricted in his bare hand as he tightened his hold, causing her to gasp for breath.

"How long have I been asleep?" he seethed, loosening his hold enough so she could speak.

"F-four weeks sir, w-w-we j-just started to w-wean you off th-the s-s-sedation t-today," she stuttered her way through the explanation as stars appeared in her eyes, a product of the oxygen deprivation as his hand was still dangerously clutching her throat.

"Did it work?" he asked gruffly, his voice scratchy from weeks of no use.

"See for yourself," another voice was speaking elsewhere in the room. A familiar voice.

Hux pushed her to the floor while he sat up to inspect the room. It was the same one they had used for Kylo's reconditioning, but this time there was another figure in the room waiting and watching the patient. When his eyes finally rested upon the hooded figure sitting on a chair in the corner and watched as it stood, Hux almost fell off the bed.

"Supreme Leader," he bowed as low as he could from the hospital bed.

Snoke approached, his sallow skin was yellowish in person and it sagged from every visible part of his body. His wrinkled fingers entwined themselves with each other as he held his hands in front of him, surveying Hux with nonchalance.

The woman on the floor was still gasping for breath, her arms propping her up on the cold tiles. Snoke looked down at her indifferently then looked to Hux as if to imply something. Hux understood loud and clear, and he reached down, grabbing the woman once again by the throat, then heaving her over his shoulder and straight into the wall where she impacted with a sickening crack, her body falling broken to the floor.

Hux looked at his hand in astonishment, such a feat of strength was beyond what even he had expected. Snoke's face contained a small smile, "Very good."

* * *

 _Author's Note: Ha! So what did you think of me providing Hux's perspective this time around? Okay, I have to be honest, a tiny part of me regrets making him sooooo evil because I watched Domnhall Gleeson in Brooklyn and About Time again this weekend and he is SO hot when he's not the bad guy (unlike Adam Driver who is hot WHEN he's the bad guy). Seriously though, I watched Brooklyn and I found myself wanting her to choose him. Honestly who could resist that accent? Only another Irish person, because I certainly couldn't!_

 _Quick question: I don't know if anyone has noticed this, but I've intentionally resisted specifying race/skin tones/etc. for anyone of the characters not directly from the movie. I've tried to give general descriptions because I want female readers to be able to imagine themselves as Serela (if that's what you're into) without feeling like, "Oh, but I'm this ethnicity, not that." So if you go back, you'll see that I didn't describe skin for Serela, Reha, or any of the characters I've inserted myself. I was kind of going for the thing people do where they put (Y/N) instead of the characters name, but to be honest those drive me insane even when the writing is otherwise good, so I just wanted to do my own variation of that._

 _My in-laws are in town and my birthday is on Friday so I'll do my best to update by Saturday but it could very well be Sunday or even Monday depending on how the week goes. This chapter took a bit of pushing to get through, and it didn't flow as easily as the others have, but I think it's because I'm getting to the end where I need to start resolving the story line and it can get overwhelming when you're trying to figure out how to do it. I can't believe this thing has passed over 100 reviews and it's almost at 30,000 views! I've been reading other Kylo (and now Hux) fanfics and there are some really good ones on here. Not so much on Wattpad, for some reason a lot of the writers on there seem really (I hate to say it) amateur. By no means am I saying mine is some masterpiece, I just sometimes read other fanfics and it feels like someone tried to write down a fantasy they had when they were 15. Literally sometimes I read stuff on Wattpad and I think someone stole into my house and ripped off my 15 year old fanfiction. (Hopefully that doesn't make me sound like an asshole). LOL._

 _Thanks again for your loyal readership. You guys keep me coming back to this story again and again, hopefully I'll get another one of those writing spurts again soon and maybe even finish it by the end of the month._


	41. XXXXI The Son

It was another 3 days after Kylo woke up before either him or Serela got the answer they were hoping for. Admittedly, it had been much harder for him than her. Even in the confines of her hospital room, Serela had her mother and the baby and a slew of other visitors everyday, whereas Kylo only ever saw Dr. Kalonia or his mother.

There were a lot of tests he had to 'pass' before they would deem him safe to be around Serela. He could read minds again by the 2nd day and when he looked into the doctor's head he saw how distrustful she was of him. Although he felt different, he wasn't thinking much in terms of the First Order vs. the Resistance. All he could think of, day in and day out, was Serela and the baby - how to get to them.

Leia continued to come a few times a day, often sitting in uncomfortable silence with him as he still refused to broach the subject he knew she wanted him to. Sometimes they would speak, but unless she was telling him about Serela and the baby his responses were usually curt and brief. Finally after the third day, Leia entered the room quietly, drawing Kylo's attention to the door before he turned away upon seeing who is was. Her heavy boots plodded across the concrete floor before she took the standard chair next to his bed, eyeing him expectantly.

"Serela's been asking to see you every day," she told him, and his face snapped towards her, looking hopeful.

"She's still very weak from the blood she's been giving on top of nursing the baby, so I'm undecided."

Kylo looked stricken, "Please..." he begged, considering getting on his knees if he were not already strapped to the bed, "Please let me see them."

"What guarantee do I have that you won't kill us all the second you're released?" she asked him matter-of-factly.

His eyes widened because he knew there was no answer he could give. Nothing that would assure her sufficiently that they were all safe while he was walking around. It occurred to him though - perhaps there was one thing... the subject they had skirted around ever since the first day she had come to visit him in this godforsaken room.

"I'm sorry, okay? Is that what you want to hear?"

Leia looked at him suspiciously, trying to gauge whether his tone was sincere. "Sorry for what?" she probed.

A sigh escape him, "I'm sorry for killing him." His eyes looked up at the ceiling, avoiding her face. He did not know what he expected to see if he looked.

"That's not good enough."

"Isn't it? I messed up mum, I shouldn't have..." he stopped himself, recounting his words silently as she looked at him in surprise.

"I-I-I didn't-" he started to say, but Leia was already standing, plugging a code into the keyboard for a machine next to his bed. In a few seconds there was a loud hiss as the metal restraints holding his wrists and ankles opened, revealing his swollen, red limbs aching from their imprisonment. For a moment Kylo just rubbed the red appendages, trying to avoid his mothers gaze and get circulation once again flowing to his body.

"That's the first time I've heard my son call me that in 15 years," she murmured.

Kylo didn't answer. Instead he felt her cold hands on his arms and flinched, expecting her to be grabbing him, but found that she was trying to help him swing his legs around and stand. When he was finally on his feet she looked up into his face with watery eyes for the first time seeing him stand before her as a man.

"My baby," her voice cracked, "My Ben, you've come back to me," her arms circled around his waist and he stiffened uncomfortably, unused to physical affection from anyone save for Serela for years. Leia squeezed his midsection until his ribs hurt and he awkwardly brought his hands around to pat her back. He didn't know what to say, in truth he wasn't sure who or what he was at this point in time. All he knew was that his burning desire, his all-consuming thought was to reach Serela and his son. He was no longer sure of Light or Dark in the tumult of feelings and blood fighting for control of his body. However, he knew his mother would never let him leave the room if she thought he was a danger, so he silently accepted her assurance of his prodigal return and waited for her to motion them to the door.

Eventually, she broke away, and he felt the wetness of her tears on his hospital gown.

"Wait here," she told him, "I'll have Dr. Kalonia bring in some clothes for you," she turned to the door before he could protest. Minutes later she returned with the doctor, who carried in her arms some dark green pants, a white shirt and a dark blue vest. Kalonia walked over to him and set them on the gurney, gesturing for him to sit down as she watched him distrustfully, beginning to remove the needles in his arm. Once complete she looked him square in the eyes as if to warn him, "We'll give you a few minutes to change."

Both women left, the sterile room felt stifling in their absence as he hurried to dress himself, almost tripping over the last pant leg as he pulled it on and hurried for the door. Outside was a long hallway where his mother and Kalonia waited across from the door, their heads lowered in furtive conversation. When Kylo emerged they stopped talking and Leia gave him a small smile, directing him to follow her as she made her way down the passages, his barefoot feet plodding deftly along on the cold concrete floor.

Kylo was almost skipping in his eagerness to get there, to see Serela, to see _his son_. The walk seemed to take ages and they rounded one corner after another, always leading to another crossroads in the hallway or one of what felt like a million other doors that were not the one they were looking for. He could feel her now, she was getting closer, or rather, he was getting closer to her. The feeling of her aura seemed to waft down the halls to him and for a second he closed his eyes, half expecting to see that same shimmering purple light guiding him to her the way it had that day on Takodana. Instead he could only continue to follow his mothers footsteps as she led the way.

Finally, when he thought he could bear it no more, and the feel of Serela's spirit was so near he felt like he could reach out and hold it, his mother opened the door to a flight of stairs. Up they climbed, 1 flight of steps, 2 flights, 3... how deep underground were they?

When they crested the landing of the 4th she held the door open for him and they turned immediately right, a single white door waiting in front of them. Serela was inside, he could feel it. The almost electric power of her presence was dimmed, but still strong enough that he would know and recognise it anywhere. It was how he had found her so quickly in the woods the day they had captured him. The call of her presence had guided him away from the lone tree in the field where she had instructed him to meet her, leading him into the forest where he had found her with that damned pilot.

Shaking his head, Kylo's was about to reach for the door when it opened and Luke stepped out, shutting the door behind him so quickly that no one inside saw who waited outside. Face to face with the man who had trained him, raised him and loved him like a son instead of a nephew, Kylo began to feel distant pangs of regret in his chest as he tried to put on a detached expression.

"Hello, my padawan," Luke greeted him softly, clasping his hands in front of him like he always had. Kylo noted he was still wearing the same weathered robes he had donned the morning of the massacre so many years before.

"Skywalker," he answered, still unable to forget the decade of training to not reference any familial ties when speaking about this man or the others he had left behind when he joined the Dark Side. His uncle did not seem perturbed by it, though Leia visibly tensed at the slight. Briefly, he worried she might change her mind about letting him see them, but he was grateful that Luke spoke next: "They're both resting right now, it's the best thing for Serela as she recovers from all the blood loss and her body allows itself to heal. Try to avoid getting her too riled up about anything."

Leia interrupted him with her own instructions, looking into Kylo's face meaningfully. "Be kind," she admonished, "And be gentle. We've all been through a lot. Serela and the baby most of all."

He nodded, chastened by their words.

"We will have much to talk about later," Luke's words hung heavy in the air, their underlying meaning clear: _You still have a lot of explaining to do, Ben._

When Kylo's hand finally turned the knob and the door opened, he stepped through gingerly, as if afraid of startling anyone inside. His eyes took in the room, where Serela lay in a much more comfortable looking hospital bed, a small bundle in her arms. Reha and Poe stood on either side of her bed, staring at his arrival in some mix of horror and trepidation.

Serela's hopeful eyes seemed to have been watching the door expectantly, and Kylo saw how they lit up when she realised who it was. Once he had stepped inside the whole room seemed to still in the moment. Serela's eyes stayed fixed on him, arms cradling her son in the blue blanket Leia had given to her months ago. Poe and her mother seemed unsure of where to look, their gazes flickering back and forth from Kylo standing tall in the doorway and Serela and the baby.

Here on one of his infrequent visits, Poe fumbled for something to say so he could leave, "I should probably give you some privacy," he mumbled, not waiting to see if anyone would object before making his exit - careful not to brush shoulders with Kylo as he passed.

Glancing behind him at Poe's retreating figure, Kylo turned back and looked from Serela to Reha, still so unsure what he was supposed to say or do.

At last, Reha spoke, "I should leave too," she quipped, and strode over to her daughter to kiss her on the forehead and bestow a quick peck on her grandson's sweet, sleeping face.

"Can you give him to Kylo?" Serela asked quietly as Reha pulled away to leave. Her mother's expression flashed from alarm to careful composure so fast Serela almost thought she'd imagined it, but knew it had been real by the way Reha's arms trembled as they reached down to lift the sleeping infant into her arms.

Warily, she approached the man in the doorway, trying to tamp down her anxiety over the moment. So much had happened since that last day in the cottage, and Reha's heart was torn between resentful mistrust over the past and ardent hopefulness that he really was as reformed as the Resistance must believe him to be if they were allowing him out of his room for visits. When she approached him, Kylo looked at her so forlornly, seeing the inner struggle inside her head as Reha deliberated whether to hand him the baby or take it with her as fast as her feet would carry them.

In the end she chose to place the child into his waiting embrace, looking longingly at his sweet, tiny face as she helped Kylo place his arms the best way to support his son's head. Finally she was satisfied that the infant was secure, at least for the moment, and left the room quickly, Leia giving her son a small nod and smile before she followed suit, closing the door behind them.

With the ensuing silence, Kylo bent his head down to look at the face of his sleeping son. The sharp angle of his nose, so reminiscent of his own, the graceful curved lines of his closed eyes, his large ears and full head of soft, downy black hair.

"He looks just like you," Serela said with a smile.

"What did you name him?" he breathed, a lone tear suddenly running down his cheek.

She paused. "Ben. Benjamin Han Solo."

Kylo's eyes scrunched together as if in pain, and it took several moments before he opened them again. When he did and their eyes met across the room she saw the rapid succession of tears running down his face, spilling onto the blankets wrapped around their sleeping son. She wanted so much to hold both of them, and reached out her arms for him as a plea to join her on the bed.

Slowly, he stepped closer and closer, the only sounds of his bare feet shuffling across the floor and the steady hum of the hospital machines next to her. Once he reached the edge of the bed he almost fell over in his efforts to sit beside her, resting his back against the headboard as he adjusted the blanket around their son. Serela's tired head fell over to rest on his shoulder, and he exhaled deeply, as though he'd been holding it in for years.

"You're here," she whispered, delicately stroking the baby's face with her fingers and tracing the shape of his nose as it rumpled with some unseen dream, his tiny lips twitching and fingers opening and closing.

"H-how are you? Are y-you al-alright?" he stuttered through his words awkwardly, trying to stave off more tears as he cradled the baby fastidiously, afraid of holding him wrong and causing damage.

"I'm fine," she assured him, "Dr. Kalonia thinks he's doing really well and I can hopefully take him home in a few days."

"Home?" he asked, confused.

"Well, to the room I've shared with my mother that is. Leia says it's still not safe for us to return to our camp outside."

He paused. There had been reports of multiple camps set up across the whole of the planet, all of them to his knowledge had been locals and many had been bombed by the First Order in the air raids led by the Resistance in the weeks before Kylo had managed to break through her thoughts and persuade her to tell him where she was. He hated the thought of her living here, underground when he knew how much her spirit craved the outdoors.

"He's almost 5 weeks old you know," her soft voice interrupted his thoughts, bringing him back to the present, "Your mother gave me this blanket for him. She said it's the same one she used when you were a baby."

Again, the emotion and the poignancy of all that had transpired in the past few days but today especially came rushing back up at him. Fresh tears came to his eyes and he turned to face her, resting the baby on his lap so he could bring up a free hand to cup her cheek. She sighed and leaned into his touch, no trace of fear, only love and trust.

"I-I'm so s-sorry," he murmured, leaning forward to kiss her on the lips. The passion was still there, but tempered as he gently probed her lips with his tongue, both knowing what he wanted to do but that this was neither the time nor place. Instead, he lifted his legs up onto the bed and gestured for her to shift over so he could lie next to her, baby Ben between them as he tried to close the space as much as he could.

They lay like that for a long time, crunched for room on the narrow bed as they both perched on the edges, their bodies turned toward the middle where they could look down in awe at their beautiful baby, the product of so much love, and the cause for so many other things still yet to come.

* * *

 _Author's Note: Alright peeps, here it is. I don't think I've ever gone so long without posting before but it was my birthday and I needed a full week to recover from my in-laws visit. Hopefully no more than 3-4 chapters left. Would certainly appreciate more comments since we're nearing the end and I'd like to know how I'm doing with wrapping things up, but thanks especially to my regular commenters like CLTex, PrettyRecklessLaura, sarahmichellegellarfan1, SarahELupin, Avenger Girl 2015 and the various other posts._


	42. XXXXII The Ultimatum

"So..." Kylo began carefully, seated in his mother's chambers awkwardly in the same dining chair she had sat in when she first met with Serela all those months ago.

Across from him on the small sofa was Leia, her twin just over her shoulder standing to the side. Kylo didn't know what he expected when Luke had told him "We will have much to talk about later." He certainly hadn't expected to meet 2 on 1 with his estranged uncle and his mother.

Leia heaved a great sigh, and he noticed for the first time a basket tucked away beside the sofa, a pair of knitting needles sticking out of it and the unmistakable shape of a small skullcap meant for an infant. A light smile tugged at the corner of his mouth as he regarded his mother for the first time in true appreciation of the gusto to which she had embraced becoming a grandmother.

Kylo's mental shields were up, and he could feel his uncle probing them as if hoping they would give way and let him pass through - giving him unfettered access to the maelstrom of thoughts and feelings that his nephew encompassed now, more than 10 years since the massacre which had separated them. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, feeling like he had somehow reversed a decade or so and was now 8 years old again - feet dangling from the chair not yet skimming the floor, his dark hair hanging in his face, skin stretched across bony limbs that poked out every which way as he waited in the oversized chair for their pronouncement against him for whatever mischief he'd gotten up to. This was a different variation though. He sat here this time as a man, tall and lanky still, but muscles and sinew had grown and covered what had once been thin, gangly arms and legs. His body more than filled the chair now, indeed he seemed to spill from it as though it were made for one much smaller than himself. His long legs stretched out at an angle and he rested one foot on top of the other, leaning back in the chair with his arms draped over the armrest casually, giving Leia the impression of what her son must have looked like as a surly teenager. The only person missing from this situation was Han.

Her heart panged at the thought and she dismissed it before it got the better of her, addressing him at last, "Ben-"

Luke interrupted before his nephew could correct his mother, "There isn't much time for us to rehash the past at the moment, so I think we should get to the point sooner rather than later."

"Agreed," Kylo spoke, his voice no longer the submissive tone he had used when trying to convince them to let him see Serela. This time when he spoke Luke heard the voice that struck terror into the hearts of men wherever he went and unleashed his temper.

"We have received intelligence that the First Order is preparing another assault, this time unleashing their full force on us, but with the addition of a new super weapon, we believe from Serela's visions that it is-"

"Wait! Serela's visions? What are you talking about?" Kylo's voice changed again, from flippant and authoritative to concern.

Luke regarded him with a interminable stare, "I thought you knew... surely given that you saw her on board the Finalizer and communicated with her in a vision..."

"Knew what? How many visions has she had?"

Leia answered before her brother could, "A half dozen or so, always at unpredictable times, and never the same. The further she was into the pregnancy the more frequent they were - to my knowledge she hasn't had another one since Ben was born."

Her eyes lit up when the name of his son rolled off her lips. The way she spoke it, so soft and reverently, as though even the name were something she cherished and could hold in her arms or cradle against her chest. Kylo could _feel_ the waves of emotion rolling off of his mother every time she spoke of Ben, and even though she put up mental shields too, he could have broken through if he wanted. Nevertheless, on those certain times when she allowed the wellspring of affection to gush up from within her at the mention of her grandson's name Kylo could feel her thoughts unintentionally projected to him - her hopes and dreams for her grandson... and her son.

"True, but her visions have given us valuable information in the past, and we believe that the First Order has attempted to make a super weapon out of a person, a General Hux, I believe," Luke's words pierced him with an anger so sudden and red hot he stood from the chair immediately, fists clenched and ready to fight.

"HUX?" he shouted, startling his mother who put a hand over her chest to steady her heartbeat as Luke watched his nephew's reaction unfazed.

Kylo's temper was at a fever pitch, going from a 2 to 100 in the seconds between hearing Hux's name specifically in association with this newest onslaught from the First Order. If Hux was involved in a super weapon program that had been constructed with Kylo's knowledge, that meant he had done so behind his back - another nail in the coffin he had already constructed for that cockroach a thousand times before in his mind.

"Yes," Luke spoke calmly, and Kylo could feel the soothing vibes he gave off in an attempt to calm him, "We believe Hux _is_ the super weapon, though what that means or what he looks like now we have no idea."

"When I get through with him he'll look like any other dead man," Kylo seethed.

His uncle seemed to be on the verge of correcting him, then remembered that this was no longer his teenage padawan, but a grown man, and instead said nothing. It was Leia who spoke next, "We need a plan."

Silence ensued and Kylo sat back down with a huff, waiting for one of them to speak again. Considering he had been unconscious for much of the past month and not given any confidential information since waking apart from the birth of his son, he hardly felt qualified to help them construct one.

"Well?" Leia looked expectantly from her brother to her son.

"Why are you looking at me?" Kylo balked under her scrutiny, "Why makes you think I can come up with a plan?"

"Because you know the First Order better than anyone - their goals, their plans. What times they do things and who is in charge of what. Your information in conjunction with our manpower could be very valuable in formulating a plan that will enable all of us to survive this," Luke explained.

Kylo shook his head and smirked, "A month ago I knew all those things. You don't seem to grasp the transitory nature of working for the First Order. The only constants in command were myself, General Hux, and Captain Phasma. Your team killed Phasma when they kidnapped Serela, then you kidnapped me a month ago, at which time I can only presume they began the process of programming Hux," his lips hissed on the man's name as he said it, "to usurp me. Any and all others in control of one area or another might be demoted or dead by now. Times that they do things is also impermanent, and they may have changed them precisely because they know I have been captured. So in terms of what I _know_ let's assume it's next to nothing, because at the moment that's probably more accurate. Of course, that's assuming I even want to help the Resistance in the first place."

A tense quiet settled between the three of them until at last Luke's eyes fixated on Kylo's face and he spoke again, "Well then, it all comes down to you. Serela's powers are too depleted from the amount of blood she gave and likely will not be able to regenerate completely while she is still nursing the baby. Her body and her energy will be continuously zapped for months now. You are our best chance for survival Kylo. With her blood you possess the strength of both her and yourself. It's her blood that brought you back to the Light, and her presence that helps keep you here, but ultimately it will come down to your decision. If you will choose your family and a life amongst the Resistance, or continue to chase after power and sacrifice everyone you know to achieve it. You are a father now Kylo, think carefully!"

In the hard wooden chair Kylo hunched over and looked at the palms of his hands. These appendages had been used for many things over the years. They had swung a lightsaber and called forth objects from around him at any time he summoned, they had retrieved information from the minds of anyone he wished and laid flat on the floor the first time he had come to Snoke after the Jedi massacre and bowed down in obeisance on the cold metal beneath him, they had saved Serela the day she had slipped off the cliff, they'd held her close to him, held her hands in his own, and later, held his body over hers as he drove into her with abandon. His mind paused on the last one. These hands had held his son. His child. There in his arms this morning he had caressed the face of the infant his hands helped to create.

He retreated into his mind and saw again the wall there, the one dividing Light and Dark that he had long ago crossed over. The weathered bricks gleamed brightly in the light of the setting sun opposite the side where he stood. For so long he had told himself the wall was tall, very tall, and when he would allow himself to look over it the height had seemed insurmountable - a perfect excuse for why he could never cross back. Besides, there were things on the other side of that wall he would have to deal with again should he return - things that were better left abandoned. This time though, he came closer to the wall than he ever had before. His feet stood at the very edge, the front of his boots skimming the bottom row of bricks as he squinted his eyes against the fading sunlight and looked across to see what now lay beyond him.

Serela stood there, her shoulder length hair framed with light from the setting sun behind her as she smiled at him, the air around her almost shimmering with the same purple light he had followed that day in the woods on Takodana. In her arms was Ben. His son. His flesh and blood. The dark, downy head of hair poked out from the blanket wrapped around his small, frail body and Kylo allowed himself for the first time in many years to feel the full force of longing to cross back over, to venture to the other side again, if for no other reason than to be with his family.

 _Family_. That was a word he had not thought of in affection for many years. When he had woken from his reconditioning on board the Finalizer and Serela was brought to him to be seduced to the Dark he had seen in her mind the want, the _need_ for family. Once he had felt that need too, but it had been many years and now the emotion feel foreign and awkward. When he had combed through her unguarded thoughts he'd seen the love she had for him and their son, the strong desire to see the three of them together, safely away from the First Order and the chaos that came with it. He had felt her agony at their separation and the great efforts she had exerted in not succumbing to his advances - all in the name of preserving their chance at forging a family together. He knew of course, simply procreating did not automatically make one a family, his own parents had been a testament to that over time as his father's lengthy absences became more frequent and his mother buried herself in her work leaving him alone and lonely for longer periods. That had not felt like a family, and so over time he told himself he did not need one and Snoke had taken the opportunity to worm his way under Kylo's skin until years later he finally shed whatever bond still remained to his blood relatives, forsaking them for something greater Snoke had said.

Now though, to see his own flesh and blood before him, just beyond his reach...

Serela's face shone in radiance as he watched her wordlessly across the wall. A breeze caught her hair and ruffled it, the purple dress she'd worn the day they met billowed against her legs as the flowers blooming all around her bowed gently over in the soft wind. Kylo turned his head to look behind him at the way he had come from. Dark thunderclouds seemed to roll across the sky, blocking out any source of light. Far away from the wall, he could see where the stormy gray clouds gave way to a blood red sky and black mountains beyond. The Force inside him whispered _To go back that way is only blood and death young Solo. You know the way in which you should go._

He turned his head again to watch Serela, and she flashed him a smile, raising the crook of her arm where Ben was nestled just enough that Kylo could see the hazy lines of his squished face sleeping peacefully.

A heavy sigh brought him back to reality, and with a start he looked up at his mother and uncle's concerned faces, absently wondering how long he had been in his reverie.

"Alright, I'm in," he said, "But we're going to need more people in here if we're to make a plan."

* * *

 _Author's Note: Well here it is, another week between chapters but guys I am on the S-T-R-U-G-G-L-E B-U-S with this. Yikes. I know I need to just trudge forward and get it done but I also don't want it to be shit, so if it takes a week between chapters at this point, I guess that's the way it's going to be. Only 3-4 chapters left anyways._

 _I got my first not-so-nice review the other night and I will admit that it stung a little bit, but I understand that the plot I've envisioned doesn't appeal to everyone (who hates babies though? Seriously!) but I still appreciate the commentary I'm getting from people and it's the only thing pushing me to finish at this point because I'm so freaking lazy. For those of you who DO like the plot and don't think the story is 'garbage' please hang in there with me a little bit longer!_


	43. XXXXIII The Debate

In the days since Kylo had finally been allowed to see her and the baby Serela had grown increasingly frustrated with a number of things. His visits had been infrequent and unpredictable, anywhere from 2 times a day to 5, and not by his own volition. He explained that Luke and his mother were conferring with him and many others on the best method of defence for when the First Order struck again. Secondly, his visits were often interrupted by someone coming to fetch him for one meeting or another, which Serela was never invited to attend under the justification of allowing her to 'rest' more.

Serela stared up at the ceiling, trying not to dwell on her own loneliness for too long. Her mother still came multiple times throughout the day, as did Finn and Rey when they could get away from the planning. It seemed everyone was involved in the preparations except for her: the person at the centre of all this.

 _Not true_ , she reminded herself, _it's the baby they want - and Kylo. You're nothing to the First Order._

The thought was very little comfort as she looked down at Ben's face again for reassurance and tried to push the pillow beneath her head up without waking him. The clock on the wall told her it was still mid-morning, and he would be due for a feeding soon, but she wanted him to get as much rest as he could beforehand in case she was finally called upon to offer her help.

Ben let out a infantile squawk at something in his sleep, his small mouth contorting as though oohing and aahing at whatever he could see behind his closed eyes. With a mild shudder, he settled back into her arms and resumed his standard sleepy posture. The door flew open suddenly and she startled, a gurgle from Ben alerting her that he had indeed woken and she sighed heavily. A low, steady wail began to emit from his tiny lips as she hurried to unfasten the shoulder of her gown so she could nurse him back to sleep.

Rey had been the one to come in, Finn just behind her but when he saw Serela getting ready to feed the baby he deliberately averted his eyes, fixating on a spot on the wall as he crossed the room with Rey to to sit in one of the chairs

"Big meeting today," Rey mentioned, grinning over at Finn who refused to meet her gaze.

"Oh?" Serela asked curiously just as Ben latched on and began to suckle. She reached for an extra blanket and slung it gently over her shoulder to cover his face and her breast so Finn would stop looking so rigidly at any and everywhere else.

A playful punch to his shoulder from Rey broke's Finn's deep concentration on the stains in the wall and made him venture a glance from her to Serela, visibly relaxing when he saw the cover, "Sorry," he mumbled awkwardly, "Just trying to be respectful."

"So about this meeting?" Serela redirected the conversation again, wondering if they had been sent to let her know so she could come.

Rey's eyes widened in recognition, "Yeah! So there's this big meeting happening in a couple hours-"

A knock on the door preceded the knob turning as it opened to admit a weary-looking Poe, his shoulders slumped and eyes looking heavy.

Serela's face broke into a smile, momentarily forgetting the question she had posed to Rey. "Poe!" she greeted him enthusiastically, and he managed a faint smile as he approached the opposite side of the bed from Finn and Rey, standing at the foot and crossing his arms. For a second, he smiled at her and looked so at ease it felt like nothing had changed other than Ben's birth and she had the old, friendly Poe back, standing ready to make a joke and offer assurances to her fears.

Almost as soon as she saw the flicker of his personality shine though, his eyes clouded again and she knew he was remembering the chasm that existed between them. One he had thought he could fill with a relationship that was more than friends, only to know once and for all that her heart was well and truly Kylo's; regardless of the past.

Finn and Rey watched the exchange as inconspicuously as possible. For Serela's sake they'd be cordial with Kylo during their limited run-ins with him, but Serela could see in their expressions that they doubted the veridity of his new devotion to the Resistance. Still, she appreciated their efforts to keep their thoughts to themselves and remain civil when in the same room with him. It was not lost on Serela the effort that it must take to remain calm when sitting across from the man who almost killed you, and the one who you'd left with a permanent angry, red scar across his face in retaliation.

Poe never came when Kylo was in the room, which she assumed to be deliberate and he must be carefully monitoring where Ben's father was at all times so as to avoid crossing paths. His arrival now was only the second time she had seen him since the first day Kylo was allowed to visit.

There was a chair against the far wall from her bed and Poe pulled it over towards her, spinning it around so he could sit backwards on it and rest his arms on the top. "How's he doing?" he asked conversationally.

Serela was about to answer when she realised he was asking about Ben, not Kylo. "He's great," she answered lamely, "Just woke up."

From there the conversation turned back to the imminent meeting and the preparations being made for the coming invasion. Speculation was rife as to when they would choose to strike at the Resistance and whether they would use solely ground troops or also resort to employing clone armies. All the while the trio chattered on about the provisional plans for the First Order invasion with the information they had gleaned from the many meetings which had already occurred, and Serela listened to them in growing frustration. Why was she not invited to this meeting, or any of the others? What was so important that everyone had to be there to hear it except for her?

She did her level best to keep the annoyance from showing on her face, and when Poe glanced at the clock on the wall and whistled, remarking on the time all three stood to their feet almost in unison, beginning to say goodbye to her and the baby. Serela blinked back tears as Finn and Poe both took turns ruffling Ben's mop of shaggy dark hair after she produced him from underneath the blanket, dazed and content with his belly full of milk. Rey leaned down to kiss his forehead and he puckered his mouth at the sensation, both women looking to each other and laughing. It brought a certain moment of relief to break the tension until they left the room, but after the door closed and she was left alone again she felt more tears pricking in the corners of her eyes and let a few of them fall.

Ben looked up at her sheepishly, his eyes already drooping from the aftereffects of his morning feed. She wiped her face with the sleeve of her medical bay-issued pyjamas and gently bounced him in her arms until he drifted back off to sleep. There was a small wooden bassinet kept in her room next to the bed and she pulled it over to her so she could place him in it, making sure not to jostle him as she situated his tiny body in the blankets.

It was then when she was finally alone with her thoughts that Serela had the time and privacy to genuinely think about all of this. She wasn't sure what she was expecting in terms of involvement with the Resistance- did they expect her to be content with her role as mother of the _Chosen One_ and stay in this bed until the battle was finished? Was her purpose supposed to be served just by giving birth and now standing on the sidelines while others planned to risk life and limb for her and the baby? What about Kylo? How was he being treated when he was not in the room with her? It was unlikely that he was a popular man amongst the Resistance and she knew a great many people probably disapproved of Leia's acceptance that he was reformed. Was he in danger staying here on the base when there were so many probably baying for his blood?

The questions ran through her head in circles until her brain ached. She didn't know the answers to any of them, and she didn't know what those leading the Resistance were thinking - all she knew at this moment was that she needed to get out of this bed and out of the room. The answers she wanted were certainly not going to find her in here.

Serela swung her legs to the side of the bed and stood to her feet uncertainly, wondering how well they would hold up to prolonged use when the most exercise she'd had for the better part of a month and a half was her daily visits to the toilet. This had to stop, she told herself, all the obsessive protection and the coddling. She needed to be present for this meeting, whether they felt she was up to the task or not. Resolute now in her conviction about it, she leaned down to the small wooden bed and gingerly lifted Ben from his comfortable spot. He stirred momentarily as she adjusted him into the crook of her arm and hummed an ancient Takodana lullaby before settling again - content.

She crept towards the door careful not to step loudly in case Kalonia or one of the orderlies heard her trying to leave, but she reminded herself that Kalonia was likely in the great meeting that everyone was invited to except her.

Thoroughly irritated by this point, she held Ben's body upright with his small head nestled under her chin as she opened the door slowly, wincing at the loud creak of the hinges when it swung from the door frame.

The hallway looked clear, and she rubbed Ben's back for comfort, hugging the wall with her body as she tried to hurry down the passage without attracting attention. She wasn't afraid of getting into trouble per se, but she knew the kid gloves everyone seemed to be handling her with needed to finally stop, and she was determined to be included in this meeting one way or another.

Bare feet slapped on the cold, concrete floor and she shivered, drawing her arms even closer around Ben. Perhaps she should have left him in the room while she went, but she didn't want to risk anything happening with all that was looming down on them and take the chance of them becoming separated. An image flashed through her mind of the First Order choosing the exact moment she left him alone to invade and snatch him from his cradle, Hux's gloating expression as he reached down to pick up her son made her stomach turn. Serela shook the dark picture aware, concentrating on remembering how to get to the council room from here. It had been so many weeks now since she'd been in a meeting, what if they had changed the location?

She closed her eyes and tried to search the Force for Kylo's presence, knowing that wherever he was, that's where she needed to be right now. Ben mewled softly in her grasp, his mouth opening and closing lazily as if searching for milk again. Thankfully he quieted after a few soft bounces and slept on. Something clicked in her mind, and Serela felt an almost invisible wave at her back, gently pushing her and ushering her onward down the series of twists and turns in the direction that she knew Kylo must be.

When the weight behind her finally stagnated, she was left standing just outside the entrance to the same council room she had stood in countless times before Ben's birth. Voices carried the few feet she stood away from the door and she could hear them raised in angry discussion.

"That's ludicrous," Poe's voice was saying, "You're allowing him to help us come up with a plan when we have no way of knowing if that's exactly what the First Order wants. We could be playing right into their hands."

Kylo's cold voice answered amidst a flurry of other responses who immediately stopped to hear his answer to such a statement, "There's nothing I can say that will convince you because you do not want to be convinced. Most of you in fact," and uncomfortable silence filled the space between his words, "It doesn't matter though, because if I'm not telling the truth then you all die and if I am telling the truth then we have a slightly mitigated chance of dying... either way you need me. We're not yet sure of what Hux's capabilities will be with the treatment he's received from the First Order. More likely than not I'm the only match for him here."

"Master Skywalker and Rey should prove more than a match for one man," Poe seethed, "The last thing we need is to release a monster who would just as soon see us all dead back to the Master who trained him."

Serela's sharp intake of breath went unheard from her place in the hallway, but she waited for the familiar rasping sound that accompanied Kylo's loss of temper and subsequent Force choke. When none came, she decided enough was enough, and took 3 large strides to emerge from the shadows through the doorway into the large, open room - her loud footsteps immediately drew almost everyone's attention.

Within seconds all eyes lifted and heads and bodies turned from the table to stare at her. Serela swallowed then forced herself to take one footstep after another until she stood just inside the room, her unsteady feet wobbling slightly from the exertion and nerves.

Kylo stood on the opposite side of the room, his mother and Luke to one side of him, Admiral Statura on the other. His hands were splayed on the huge rounded table with his shoulders hunched forward, eyes betraying his weariness to her as he looked up with a start to see her standing there with their baby.

Trying her best to put on a brave face, Serela continued to move towards the table where everyone was circled. Finn and Rey stood at the spot she joined and they stepped to the side enough for her to have room to stand, neither of them saying anything but Rey shot Serela a sly smile with a wink before reaching her hand over towards the blanket - gently pulling back the corner of it just enough to see Ben's sweet, peaceful face.

Many seemed shocked to see her here, others, like Kylo and his mother and uncle, did not seem too surprised. It was Poe who decided to address her abrupt presence though, speaking across the table in an exasperated tone. "What are you doing here Serela?"

She caught the warning glance Kylo shot him even though Poe did not, he was looking positively livid with her for the audacity to be here.

Serela cleared her throat, "This council is planning how to respond to the First Order's invasion of D'Qar and their efforts to kidnap my son. I think I have the right and the duty to be here for the discussions."

This time Leia spoke, though much more kindly, "You just gave birth dear, and your power is very weak from all that you've physically been through even since then. No one expects you to participate in this or the impending battle."

"I appreciate everyone's concerns about my health and keeping my strength up, but it is much harder for me to be kept in the dark about important plans than it was for me to walk down here. I gave birth over a month ago and I haven't given blood in days. This shouldn't be too difficult for me."

Kylo's face twitched as his eyes watched her warily, looking for the slightest sign that she was having trouble holding her own. A low whimper sounded from the bundle in her arms and the room's other inhabitants looked from Serela and the baby to Kylo and his mother as baby Ben began to wail.

"Serela take Ben back to your room! A war council is no place for a baby!" Poe chastised her brusquely - his voice hushed but stern.

Even from across the table Serela could see that Kylo's eyes clouded very suddenly, "You don't make any orders regarding the treatment of Serela or my son Dameron. I'd tread carefully if I were you."

Serela's crestfallen face lightened somewhat at Kylo's defense of her, but her heart withered at the dark look she received from Poe, who never once glanced in Kylo's direction, instead keeping his eyes fixed on her and the squalling baby she held.

Rey reached her arms to Serela in an offer to hold him, which she accepted. The whole room watched as Rey bounced the infant tenderly, shhing him and rocking his small frame from side to side while she smiled up at Finn, a sweet picture of what their own happy family might one day look like if they both survived the battle that was yet to come.

"Well then, if everyone is ready I think it's time we continue," Leia's voice broke through the silence as Ben's voice quieted under Rey's persistent coaxing, drawing a rare smile from Kylo as his eyes locked onto Serela's, wishing that he could leave his spot at the head of the table to stand beside them, her soft hand held firmly in his own.

* * *

It was much later when the council finished and Serela had to leave at one point to feed Ben in the hallway, returning just in time to hear the meeting being adjourned. Dr. Kalonia approached her first, scolding her ineffectually before resting a hand on her shoulder and giving it a squeeze before parting with, "I suppose you and Ben will be moved to your own room now."

Hopeful at the thought, Serela's face noticeably brightened and she searched the room for Kylo, finding him still perched at the head of the table, deep in private conversation with his mother and Admiral Statura.

To her left Snap Wexley and Poe were conversing in low murmurs, both looking directly at her and Ben until they saw her notice them. Rey gave Ben's back one more soft rub as she and Finn strode out together, hoping to find a bit of alone time in the aftermath of such a tense meeting. It left Serela standing by herself on the opposite side of where she wanted to be - next to Kylo.

She had been so distracted catching his eye across the table that she hadn't noticed Poe and Snap ending their conversation, allowing Poe to saunter over and stand beside her. When he cleared his throat suddenly to get her attention she jumped, jostling Ben but thankfully not enough to wake him from his heavy post-milk sleep.

"Easy now," Poe said, "You've been really jumpy lately." Serela caught Kylo's eyes again just in time to see the danger flashing in them at the sight of her and Poe standing so close together. _It's fine,_ she told him, but he did not respond, averting her consolation by keeping his attention fixed on whatever Statura was in the midst of saying.

If Poe was waiting for her to respond he was doing so in vain. When she finally met his gaze it was only to give him a glare that said exactly what she thought of the scene he had lent himself to. The look she gave must have unnerved him because he began to speak again, though the words that came from his mouth were much less apologetic-sounding that she assumed he meant for them to be.

"Look, I didn't mean to overstep, but you're really stretching yourself thin here," he spoke low, hoping that neither Kylo across the table nor any of the other people still milling around them in furtive conversations of their own could overhear the heated exchange transpiring in their midst.

"I'm not really sure I'd call that an apology, Poe," she rebuked him, "You might want to try rephrasing it." If she hadn't been holding Ben she would have crossed her arms over her chest, as it was she held him closer to her and felt his warm breath on her neck as she swayed slightly from side to side.

"Look Serela, everything I've ever done or said has been for _your_ benefit and _your_ good. I've tried to protect you even when it's clear you don't want my protection - you don't think you _need_ my protection, but Serela-" he stepped so close to her now she glanced over at Kylo in alarm, afraid he might attack him again like that day in the woods, "Serela, no matter what happens, no matter what choices you've made or make, I will _always_ be here trying to help you - to keep you and Ben safe."

"Trouble, Dameron?" a cold voice behind Poe broke steady eye contact he'd been holding with Serela, and before turning to glare at Kylo she saw Poe give a roll of the eyes.

A fake smile erupted on the pilot's face when both men were suddenly shoulder to shoulder, his body standing between Kylo and his family - a paradox not lost on any of them.

"No trouble at all _Ren_. You seem tense. Feeling a bit overprotective are we?"

"I have no problem being protective over what's mine," Kylo growled.

Poe chuckled, "Serela isn't yours. Or anyone's. She's not a thing to be possessed. Neither is Ben. He may be your flesh and blood, that doesn't make you a father. What kind of father threatens to kill his mother the moment his child enters the world? Hmm?"

Serela saw the nerve he struck and wheeled around Poe to place herself between them. "Enough!" she hissed, noticing the looks their little entourage was receiving from those who still lingered in the council room. Ben gave a little snort in his sleep and the hostile eye contact between the two men was broken.

"Poe," she addressed him directly, "Thank you for your concern for my well-being, and Ben's. While I appreciate everything that you've done for us, I need to speak with Kylo alone now please."

His face betrayed none of his true emotions the way they always did when he and Serela had been alone together. Instead he kept his icy glare and stoic posture, giving a haughty huff before he turned on the heel of his boot and left, not looking back.

Finally she turned to Kylo, trying to read his emotions right now was almost as hard as it had been when he wore that awful mask.

"Don't listen to hi-" her voice was cut off by Kylo's.

"You think he's the first person I've heard it from?" he asked her quietly, "Oh, the other don't say it, but I can hear it in their thoughts as loud as if they were shouting it. _What kind of father does she think he will be? How can he just waltz back in her and be accepted with open arms? Poe would've been a better father to that poor baby."_ He shook his head almost violently, as if trying to empty the thoughts of those surrounding him.

Desperate to give him some reassurance, Serela quipped, "What am I thinking then?"

Kylo regarded her with sad eyes, lifting his fingers halfheartedly to her temple and finding no resistance from her - giving him access to the pictures in her mind. She showed him her memories of them together on Takodana, the love, respect and tenderness he had lavished upon her there. She showed him the way his whole countenance had changed when she told him he was going to be a father, and the look on his face when he beheld his son for the first time. Lastly, she showed him an image he already knew well, of her standing in the field of gold, him by her side and Ben nestled between them in the midst of their embrace.

His fingers broke contact with her and she shuddered at the energy it had taken to show him everything she'd wanted him to see. She could feel her energy draining the longer she was up and about, but she wasn't ready to leave him just yet.

"I've been given permission to move more freely around the base in exchange for _services rendered_ ," the sarcasm in his voice was unmistakable, "So long as I am always in the presence of a member of the Resistance," he murmured, his mouth close enough to her ear to send familiar shivers through her. His eyes widened in recognition of the signs he knew well. One of his large hands reached up to cup her cheek and he brought his head down until their foreheads were touching, the tips of their noses almost grazing each other. "Can I come and see you tonight?" he asked breathlessly, an undertone of hope in his strained voice.

"Yes," she whispered, and for a moment she thought he was going to kiss her. Instead she saw him cup the back of Ben's head and lean down to bestow a gentle kiss on the top before he turned and abruptly followed his mother and uncle out. Serela stood dazed, looking down at her son and thinking through all that had happened since she decided to leave her room hours ago.

Once she returned to the hospital wing, she found that most of her meager belongings had already been moved. When she tracked down an orderly to ask him why and where they had gone, he shrugged his shoulders and brushed past her in a hurry, under strict orders from the doctor to begin carrying down boxes of medical supplies into the deeper levels of the base in order to continue treating people should the upper levels of the base fall into First Order control.

Frustrated and tired, her arms were growing weary of carrying Ben for hours and she was beginning to feel the shaky effects of so much exercise after weeks of sedentariness. Thankfully, just as her legs were beginning to feel weak and she thought she might need to sit down on the floor for a moment, Leia and Kalonia rounded a corner, the doctor pushing an empty wheelchair in her hands.

"Serela! There you are!" Leia exclaimed, "We thought we'd beat you back to the room but apparently not. Your things have been moved to your own quarters now in a room next to your mothers, and- dear, are you feeling alright?" Leia's concerned face was taking in Serela's exhausted appearance and shaking knees, her watery eyes looking blearily at both women.

"Oh dear," Kalonia stepped forward and took Serela's elbow in her hand, guiding her to sit in the wheelchair, "I think you overdid it today, didn't you?"

All Serela could do was nod, leaning her head back and trying to hold onto Ben as her arms threatened to give out. His weight was removed from her grasp and she lifted her eyelids just enough to see Leia standing in front of her, cradling her grandson as carefully as if he were made of glass.

"W-where's Kylo?" she slurred her words, trying to keep her eyes open as the chair began to move, Leia keeping stride beside them with Ben safely in her arms.

"He's busy with the ground troops at the moment dear, he told me he would come to see you and Ben tonight," Leia's voice already sounded distant, and Serela could feel the welcoming embrace of sleep beginning to enfold her. The last thing she heard was Kalonia's muffled voice saying, "-foolish to have done so much so soon... what was she thinking?" then she was gone.

* * *

When she came to again, she was in a different room, similar to the one she had shared with her mother, but with only a single large bed instead of the bunks that came standard with each room. Reha was sitting beside her, dozing softly in a plush armchair that had been somehow produced from who-knows-where. Serela's gaze darted around the room looking for Ben, and she saw his bassinet standing between the door to the lavatory and the dresser, his small fist visible through the wooden bars. Sighing with relief, she still felt woozy and lifted her hand to her forehead, feeling for a temperature.

Reha's eyes cracked and when she saw the movement indicating Serela was awake. She straightened up in the chair, twisting her back from side to side until it cracked. "You've been asleep for a long time," she smiled down at her, combing through the top of Serela's hair with her fingers.

"What time is it?" she asked her mother, rolling onto her side with a yawn.

"Still early evening," Reha replied, "Kylo already came by twice to see you. He held Ben for a few minutes but left after that."

Her daughter nodded and rolled off the bed, thoughts still foggy from her lengthy sleep. Serela walked over and stood in front of Ben's bassinet, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest as he breathed. "How long ago did he come here last?" she asked quietly, not wanting to wake him.

"About an hour. He said he would keep checking in. You were pretty worn out," Reha answered with a smile. Serela nodded again, feeling mildly dizzy and thinking she should probably drink some water when there was a knock at the door.

Reha eyed her daughter as if you say _Are you going to answer or me?_ and Serela stepped over to the door, trying to open it fast but quietly in case the next knock caused Ben to stir.

Relief washed over her face when she saw it was Kylo, his uncle standing beside him as well as another man she didn't recognise over his other shoulder.

"Hi," she breathed, "Ben's asleep, so you have to speak softly."

Kylo's eyes gravitated to the small crib where his son lay sleeping and Serela could feel the warmth radiating from his heart stronger than she had since Takodana. Then his attention turned back to her and she suddenly felt very warm herself.

"I'll leave and give you two some privacy," Reha's sudden voice was much closer than Serela had expected and she turned to kiss her mother's cheek before she swept out of the room on the tails of Luke's robes.

"She still doesn't like me very much," Kylo murmured when the door was shut behind them and he knew they had all dispersed.

Serela couldn't say much to refute his words. It was true that Reha had never approved of him, nor taken a particular liking to him due to her uncanny intuition about the trouble he would bring. It dawned on him for the first time that Reha's presence here was an anomaly. Memories came rushing back to him of terse words between them in the kitchen of their cottage before she had made for the back of the house to escape, not having time to get away before the First Order rained hell down upon her home while she was still inside.

Embarrassed that he hadn't even noticed when he saw her in the room with Serela and his son the first time he'd seen them, he asked her, "How did she survive?"

She shook her head and tears came to the corners of her eyes. "We don't know. She said it felt like the explosions propelled her out of the house. It's a miracle she did, I thought-"

Kylo drew her close to his chest while she cried into his shirt, trying to muffle the sound of her sniffles. The warmth she'd felt from him earlier seemed to engulf her as she wept her grief, and the Light she had seen flickering in the Darkness inside him those few times since Takodana seemed to shine brightly here, as if finally free of whatever had been snuffing it out for so long. After she'd spent herself crying and pulled away his hands held her face as gently as the first day he'd kissed her in the woods behind her house. Unspoken words seemed to pass between them and when he finally brought his lips crashing down onto hers it felt like she was there in those woods again, feeling the weight of his mouth against hers for the first time. His hands roamed her back and fisted themselves into her hair. She moaned into his mouth when he pulled her hard against him before leading her to the bed.

His lovemaking was slow and methodical, just as she remembered it. When he laid her down and came to rest atop her body he clung to her like a drowning man to a raft, his grip pleasurably tight as he helped her peel away her layers.

Self-conscious over her new stretchmarks and slight stomach pooch, Serela moved her hands to cover them and shield her imperfections from his eyes.

"Don't do that," he whispered, "I've waited so long for this. Let me see you. Let me see all of you."

Warily, she pulled her hands away and he lifted her arms to wrap them around his neck, kissing her along her collar bone and down lower, where he gripped her hips tightly as he explored her body again.

Her moans as his mouth circled her chest were enough to send him over the edge and he stroked himself before he brought the tip to her entrance. "I'll go slow," he promised, and began to inch his way into her.

The pain was worse than their first time when he had claimed her so fully. Every inch of him felt like it stretched her beyond all feasibility and he stopped when she cried out in pain, muffling her groans with his lips. Once he had finally sheathed himself completely inside of her, he began to move slowly, tortuously in and out, in and out. Her moans of pain soon became something else as the sharpness of it subsided and gave way to a dull, pleasurable pain that she found she could bear.

"Oh Serela..." he grunted in her ear, "Oh, I missed this. I missed you. Us."

She used her hands on his shoulders to turn his head so she could kiss him fully, delving into his mouth with her tongue as she tasted him. The muted sound of Ben's shallow breathing on the other side of the room reminded her of the product of this: their fierce, passionate lovemaking had resulted in him. Her head arched back into the pillow and she moaned with the knowledge that she had given him this; she had given Kylo a son... and a second chance.

The pleasure building up within her that had plagued her nightly throughout her pregnancy was reaching a fever pitch. She felt his every thrust with sharp accuracy, her body unused to being opened this way after so long. His chest glistened in a damp sheen of sweat as he pounded into her slight body, dragging his tongue along her neck and she bit into his shoulder just before she cried out her climax, bringing him to his own after another thrust. When they were finished, Kylo almost collapsed atop her- both replete after their exertions.

He gathered her delicately in his large arms, muscles cradling her naked body to his and he used two fingers to stroke her back, burying his face into her hair and inhaling her smell. She caught his hand in her own when he brought it around to cup her breast in his hand and kissed his palm before releasing him to hold her even tighter.

Before she felt herself slipping back into unconsciousness, she heard his low voice against her ear, "I love you Serela," to which she answered, "I love you too."

* * *

 _Author's Note: Okay, so the smut wasn't as gratuitous as the first time. Sorry if you were holding out for something more explicit. I decided to err on the side of tasteful rather than trashy since this is such an emotional moment for the two of them after so much time and so many things keeping them apart._

 _ALSO, WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE back to writing 6000+ word chapters. I think I'm almost done. Only one more chapter before the big showdown and then I'm debating on whether or not to write an epilogue. I guess we shall see how well the last chapters are received. Thanks again for everyone hanging in there especially the people still giving me feedback every time. You da real MVPs :P_


	44. XXXXIV The Preparations

The room was hazy, the lighting dark and subdued. Cold seemed to emanate from everywhere - walls, floor, ceiling. In the centre of the room, a giant holopad screen was erected, broadcasting an even larger holographic image of the planet D'Qar. The serene sphere turned itself, reflecting it's bluish light upon the metal walls ominously.

Two men in black stood before the screen, watching the orbit silently as they contemplated their next move. The man with the red hair spoke first, "We will launch our first assault tomorrow Supreme Leader, no doubt they will be prepared for our arrival, but with sheer wealth in numbers in addition to the new powers bestowed upon me by your grace, we shall not fail to retrieve the child."

"Yes," Snoke's voice rumbled in the chilly room, "The child is here already. I can feel him through the Force which binds us. He is small, but strong already, though he knows it not. There will be no need to bring the girl assuming she is still alive when you find her."

Hux's face went from mild jealousy at the implication that Snoke could already feel the presence of such a powerful infant to malicious pleasure at the Supreme Leader's permission to dispose of the mother, if not necessarily the son. "Just to be clear Supreme Leader, upon finding the girl alive-"

Snoke waved his hand dismissively, "Yes, yes, you may kill her however you wish. So long as it does not interfere with the plan we have set forth, I have no objections."

Although he hid it well, Hux was delighted. His strength had increased dramatically since he woke and after another physician had been brought in to attend to him he quickly begin to discover the full range of his new power. All of his senses were heightened: sight, smell, touch, taste, hearing. When taken to the room for medical testing on the treadmill his speed had been so fast the revolving rubber mat had been torn from the machine. His strength was unparalleled - they had produced a series of progressively large objects, each of which he had lifted above his head with little to no effort. Even more surprising, his healing reflexes were drastically enhanced. At one point he had punched the heaviest object they had brought for him to lift, a boulder, and in the process of punching it to see the reaction he had broken every bone in his hand, leaving a large indentation behind while pebbles and large chunks of rock were sent scattering across the floor. Within moments of surveying his bloodied, battered hand, the bone had reset themselves, fingers bent back the way they had been before and the open cuts on his hand closed and sealed themselves, leaving only a few faint red smudges behind from his blood.

He had looked up that day to see Snoke watching him in admiration, something he had longed for so long to see. Always, _Ren_ had been the special one. They were bonded through the Force and Ren was unstable, thus making him easier for Snoke to manipulate. Hux however had been bred from birth for this life. His father Brendol had married later in life to a young woman of one of the galaxy's ancient houses, the Elegins. Much like Phasma in his lineage, Hux had taken pride in his father's legacy while striving from a young age to begin building his own. His mother had been a quiet thing, demure and subdued like she'd been trained to be all her life. Her husband did not pursue marriage for love, Hux knew, but for position and power, and the opportunity to sire an heir. After she had delivered him of a son Brendol visited very infrequently until Hux's 5th birthday, at which point he took him with him the next time he came. He never saw his mother again.

When he would ask his father about what had become of his mother, Brendol would answer in the same way: "She is at home. Waiting for you to come back and see her as a man."

For years he strove to work hard, not only to impress his father and other superiors, but in order that he might prove to everyone, including himself, that he was now a man, and prepared to go home and make his mother's eyes light up with pride.

In the years since his departure, he had forgotten most of her face. Certain details of her remained in his memory, the long blonde hair, soft graceful hands that stroked his face at night when she tucked him into bed, thin arms that held him to her chest as she rocked him back and forth, kissing away his tears at the thought of leaving her.

By the time he was 16 Hux had established himself at the top of his class in every area. He outsmarted, outran, out-tested and generally outshone everyone around him. Instead of receiving a beaming look of pride from his father, his recitation of his high marks were met with underwhelming praise that sounded forced and contrived. _Well done my son. You've made your father proud. Continue to honour our name and legacy._

Less and less did Hux feel the urge to ask Brendol about his mother, nor indeed, did he have many opportunities. The further along he moved in his promotions, the more often he was stationed away from his father, a Commandant of the First Order now who frequently was sent abroad on other missions. At the culmination of his training when he was 21, Hux had decided to do something uncharacteristic for him. He was granted a 3 day leave and took a private TIE fighter to fly back to his home planet - Hosnian Prime. By now he had made many connections and gained every clearance imaginable, so tracking down his file and the records for his previous residence had been relatively easy. When he returned though, he was met with a crumbling visage of the once grand estate he'd spent his formative years on.

The ship had landed on a circle of flat stones, most cracked and broken from years of being miskept. The former vibrant gardens were reduced to shrub and weeds, with small clusters of parched flowers springing up from the vines and hedges, thirsty for water that seldom came from the yearly rains.

His former home was large, a sign of his maternal family's wealth and prestige. It had been gifted to his parents, he knew, from his mother's father, a former senator who was all too happy to secure such an advantageous marriage for his only daughter. His sons had followed him into politics, but it was she who could bring her father more power and influence by his association with such a prestigious member of the First Order. Long thought to be sympathisers to the Republic, Senator Elegin told himself he was merely a pragmatist, and whichever side was going to be the winner, that was the one he wanted to be on the best terms with.

Hux had taken the stone steps up from the garden to the house 2 at a time, kicking branches and other various and sundry debris out of his path as he hurried to the door, opening it with no trouble - it had not been locked in some time.

Inside, he had wandered the hallways, looking for any trace of his mother or other life that might lead him to know where she was or how to find her. The house was long, and the rooms were many, but he searched each one methodically, ripping down the curtains pulled tight over the 10 foot windows and coughing the dust that settled into his lungs after so many years of being left to collect.

A yellow bedroom he recognised as his own was on the 2nd floor, toys and small boys clothes still littered around the floor. When he closed his eyes, he thought he could distantly remember flinging them across the room in defiance of his father's order to pack in haste. His hands found a small carved wooden horse on a dresser and brought it up to inspection, blowing the years of dust from it. Try as he might, he could not remember any special attachment to a single item in this room aside from the person who had held him as he thrashed against her the last time he'd been inside. Somberly, he placed the horse back on the dresser, matching the feet with the four circles made in the dust where it had sat for years before shutting the door behind him.

Each of the four floors was searched, closets, bedrooms, kitchens, toilets, library, the attic and the wine cellars. There was not a sign of life anywhere in the house except for the birds who had managed to find a way into the attic, building themselves elaborate nests in the rafters.

Scoping out the first floor one final time, Hux stumbled over a large picture frame that had fallen on the floor, the velvet backing covered in dust like everything else in this lifeless house. He bent down to flip it over and underneath the broken glass, he caught sight of the still flawless image of his mother. Frantically, he had pried the photo from the frame as delicately as he could manage, consuming her image ravenously as he stared upon the woman he had not seen clearly for 17 years. In the photo she was seated on a chair- smiling, her teeth perfectly straight and her long, wavy blonde hair draped down to her waist. On her lap was a child, Hux recognised his younger self even though his father was not the type to keep any photos or other symbols of sentimentality close to him. His bright red hair countered hers, another inheritance from his father he'd had no choice in. Both he and his mother looked up at him beaming from the photograph, and he quickly unbuttoned his uniform to slip it inside to take with him.

Outside again, he surveyed the horizon, seeing nothing but sprawling gardens, fields of grass and rows upon rows of trees outlining the edges of the fields. Flying here there had not been another house for miles, and he told himself likely the nearest person had no idea who had lived here or how long ago they had left.

Lifting his feet to descend the steps again, he looked every which way in the garden, trying desperately to find any final clues as to his mother's whereabouts. Birds chirped nearby, oblivious to his plight and singing merrily at him from their perches among the windowsills of the house. He was almost back to the menacing black silhouette of his ship when it caught his eye.

There amongst the remnants of the garden, in a small enclosure framed by shrubs, he saw the edging of a long overgrown headstone, it's visage marred by years of neglect. His breath caught in his throat, his brain deliberating whether or not to approach, and whether he was ready to for what it might say. Stepping closer, Hux had brushed the top of fallen leaves and carefully tugged away the ivy and other vines that had grown over it. When the inscription could finally be read, he squatted down to see his worst fears confirmed. The name of his mother, long forgotten to him but listed as Emila Elegin Hux in his file, was carved into the filthy stone. Underneath read the title, _Beloved sister, daughter, wife and mother._ The date of her death was some 6 months past the day Hux left on his father's command shuttle, 17 years before. Tearfully waving goodbye to her only child, she had held herself together only after some terse words from Brendol in the hallway when she tried to comfort Hux while he was tugged away from her in the direction of the ship.

That night he had gone into Republic City, the capital of Hosnian Prime which lay not 15 miles from his family estate. He walked the streets in plainclothes like any other civilian, albeit one that stepped much more rigidly than the average person with a decidedly haughty demeanor about him. The first brothel he found he entered with little difficulty, securing a night with one of their finest girls. His only condition: she had to be blonde.

His first time was over very quickly. What he had normally taken care of in the privacy of his room or the showers when no one else was there now could find release through another conventional outlet. The girl rolled her eyes when he came after only a few minutes, and his temper had flared instantaneously. Used to being obeyed, and while not experienced in the art of sex, he was plenty experienced in getting what he wanted and knowing what his money afforded him, Hux demanded she bend her body over the bed.

She complied without ceremony, and this time it was much easier than the first to channel the excess. He had pounded into her ruthlessly, relishing her cries as she begged him to stop or go slower. Instead, he increased his pace and depth, wanting to punish her for being so disrespectful, for thinking that she was somehow better than him. She... a common whore.

When he was finished this time he collapsed on top of her and she rolled out from underneath him, sniffling through her pain and grumbling about how he never explained that he was going to be rough, or she would have declined his money and suggested one of the other girls. That moment something had snapped in him and he'd grabbed her chin in his hands, digging his fingers into her cheek as she cried out and he grunted into her ear that if he heard her complain again, it would be the last thing she ever did. He had taken her three more times before he left in the morning, leaving her sore and watching him with eyes that betrayed her hurt physically and emotionally. He'd gone back to his base early and tucked the picture away in a drawer in his room. He never spoke of his trip, the picture, or the whore to his father or anyone else. Periodically, he wondered if she had still been on the planet when he'd ordered its destruction at the hands of the Starkiller base.

Standing here now, in the command centre just off to the side of the bridge, accessible only through a single set of thick metal doors, Hux found himself reliving these things all over again for the first time in years. His reaction to Snoke's admiration felt perplexing, even to him, but with so many chemicals inside him, so much raw, untamed power coursing through his body - he fought the urge to destroy, to take hold of the man in front of him and tear him apart for the life he's been forced to live and what it had cost him without his knowing. Later digging in his files he'd found his mother's death recorded, labelled _suicide_. She had thrown herself from the top of the house in her grief over losing her only child, and presumably the knowledge that she would never see him again, and even if she did, he would never be the same.

Snoke was not his father, and his father had been the one to cause this, Hux knew. Still, the well-oiled machine of the First Order had been the alter of sacrifice his mother was expected to pay homage to with or without consent. First a marriage, then a child, then a lifetime of loneliness when faced with an empty house and no son or husband to share it with.

"You're troubled General, what is it?" Snoke sounded almost unnerved. Miraculously, one of the side effects of this powerful serum was that Hux's mind could no longer be read. It seemed the synapses in his brain fired at such rapidity that it was impossible even for the Supreme Leader to find a way through the metaphorical myriad of wires that fused together within Hux's head to see what lay inside. It unnerved him, Hux could sense that now, and it pleased him.

"Your father has been informed of your successful transition," Snoke changed the subject, and Hux noticed how frail and old his body was in person. Such a slight creature for one so powerful, what would it take to break...

"He sends you his greetings," Snoke finished, and Hux gained a moment of clarity.

"His greetings?" he asked, his usually careful temper already rising at the mention of his father.

"Yes..." Snoke was looking at Hux suspiciously, and the redhead felt himself inwardly bracing for something, though he wasn't sure what. Although physically his posture remained unchanged, internally he felt like a wild animal rearing itself back preparing to strike. Images flashed through him frenetically: his beautiful mother crying, his father's stern face in the shuttle telling him to 'man up', the picture he found on the floor of his old home, the whore in Republic City, flares in the darkness of space as his superweapon destroyed the only planet where he had ever known love...

"What is it you are thinking General?" the wide eyes of the creature standing in front of him suddenly betraying fear.

Snoke was fast, but Hux was faster. If he had not possessed the speed for it, he would have been dead in a moment. As it happened, his fingers closed around Snoke's head and throat so quickly the Supreme Leader scarcely had time to think before it happened. In one violent twist, Hux snapped the neck of his former chieftain, reveling in the loud crack that reverberated through the room and sent a deep, pleasurable wave of satisfaction running through Hux before he whipped the lightsaber from Snoke's waist, ignited it and sliced through the Supreme leaders torso in one fell swoop, severing the spinal cord at both ends.

Moments passed, minutes even, and Hux stood there looking at the pool of blood and the dismembered body lying atop it. So many years of pent-up anger and hate, so much time the old man had spent underestimating him, until at last relenting and thus sowing the seeds of his own destruction.

Hux was a man now, he was sure of it. If his mother could see him standing here, after slaying the all-powerful Supreme Leader of the First Order, essentially usurping control over the whole enterprise, he imagined she would beam with pride like he had dreamed of so many times. She would wrap her arms around her son and tell him, "I'm so proud of you and the man you've become."

"I'm a man," he spoke out loud to the room, listening to how the words sounded and felt on his tongue, "I am a man."

There was only one other thing standing between him and greatness. One other person who could attempt to supplant him. _Kylo Ren._ Tomorrow would be the last day he or his child took breath if Hux had anything to do with it. He had already defeated Snoke, a figure infinitely more powerful and emotionally stable than that hyped up overgrown teenager with daddy issues. The child was unimportant, if dead, he could not possibly present a threat to Hux down the line anymore than his father. Yes, the child must die... and the mother too. His lips curled up at the thoughts of what he'd like to do to her first.

At last he stepped over the pieces of Snoke's body and shook his boots to spatter the blood off of them. He opened the door and both storm troopers guarding it turned to him expectantly, not yet aware of the carnage he was leaving in his wake.

"The Supreme Commander is dead," Hux informed them coldly, "Ready the troops. We attack at dawn."

* * *

Serela shot up in bed, flinging Kylo's arms off of her as she did and gasping for breath. He was awake in an instant, his hand on her back trying to soothe her as he turned on the bedside lamp. The silence in the room was only broken by her shuddering breaths until the familiar sound of Ben's tiny cry could be heard. It was so unusual for him to wake in the night...

"What happened?" Kylo asked worriedly, swinging his legs out of the bed and scurrying across the room to retrieve Ben.

"I-I-I," she stuttered, trying to sift through her horror and find the words to tell him. Ben's soft cries were increasing now and he was quickly becoming frantic. Still naked from earlier, she held out her arms to Kylo, indicating for him to pass Ben to her. When she brought her baby's mouth to her breast however, he refused to take it.

Her heart thumped even more wildly. Did her infant son already sense what was coming? Is that why he was acting so strangely for him?

"SERELA!" Kylo raised his voice, becoming more agitated by the moment, "What is going on?"

She shook her head and reached for his hand, bringing it to her temple wordlessly. He was hesitant at first, but finally relented and she showed him what she had seen in its entirety. The room. Hux. Snoke. The murder. Everything. When he had finished she looked to him for a response and was met with an expression of abject terror.

"Snoke is dead," he whispered, and for a moment his very soul seemed to lighten at the thought. The relief was short-lived however, as he remembered that Hux was still very much alive, and somehow able to defeat a Sith Lord.

Serela was shaking, her fingers fumbling as she tried to comfort Ben. This was so much to take in, what time was it? There wasn't a clock in here so she didn't know. It could be only an hour until dawn for all they knew.

 ** _Master,_ ** she called, **_Master are you awake?_**

At first there was no answer, and she worried what her next step would have to be. Then finally...

 ** _What is it Serela?_**

 ** _Master, come to my room quickly, I've had another vision. Bring Leia too. Please hurry, it's urgent._**

There was a brief pause before she heard his response. _**We will be there soon**._

"Get dressed now!" she told him, the first complete sentence to come from her mouth since she'd woken.

"Why?" he asked, trying to hear her over Ben's ceaseless cries.

"Luke and Leia are on their way!" she almost shouted over their son.

Kylo jumped to his feet and scrambled to find his clothes that had been so carelessly discarded mere hours earlier while Serela continued her efforts to soothe Ben. When Kylo was fully dressed he offered to take the baby so she could find her own and she handed him to his father reluctantly, hastening to make herself appropriate before their arrival. She had no sooner pulled on her last pant leg than came a harsh knock at the door.

Ben screamed louder now, and she opted to take him from Kylo first, then crossed the room to wrench open the door, revealing a bleary-eyed Leia with her twin in tow.

"Serela, what is the meaning of this?" she spoke over Ben's voice, even more high-pitched when he saw more people had come. They entered quickly and shut the door behind them as Serela began to explain her vision, and everything she had seen. When she had finished repeating everything 2-3 times so both could hear her over Ben, she tried again to feed him, and this time when she lifted her shirt to offer him milk he took it, sucking greedily.

"Poor thing," Leia demurred, "It's so unlike him to wake up during the night."

Serela nodded and swallowed the words in her throat, looking over at Kylo and knowing that he understood. Their son knew something very serious was brewing.

Luke knew it too, though he did not say so.

"How long until dawn?" Kylo asked them, his hand finding its way onto Serela's shoulder, its heavy presence a comfort.

"It's nearly midnight. We'll have to wake everyone, oversee the preparations. We've been ready for weeks but thank goodness for this extra notice so we can be waiting for them. Every moment tomorrow will count," Leia was explaining, going over with them the plans that had been formulated during the council meeting that afternoon.

"Serela, you and Ben will be with me, as well as Luke and Rey. Kylo will be with Finn and the other ground troops while Poe and Snap lead the counterattack from the air. We will bunker down here in the base as well as we can and wait it out. Luke and Rey will be with us in case they get through the ground forces."

Kylo flinched at her recapitulation of everything they had covered in the hours they'd stood in that room. This had been a particular sore spot for him. They had determined that their best line of defence would be to keep Ben and Kylo apart, otherwise if the First Order knew where they both were they would concentrate all their attention on one spot. By keeping their family separated, they ensured that the First Order would have to fight on multiple fronts. While he understood the justification behind it, it still felt like they didn't trust him not to betray the Resistance and hand Ben over to the First Order.

After she had finished rehashing everything she could think of, Leia stood abruptly. "I'll alert Admiral Statura and we can begin to wake the others. Hopefully this head start will work in our favour." With that she took her leave telling them to wait here for further instruction which should be along soon. Luke remained behind, his eyes closed in deep meditation.

Ben was finally settling and after he finished nursing he drifted back to sleep, but it was a fitful kind. His tiny body jerked involuntarily every few minutes as he shuddered at some unseen horrors. Serela look fretfully from Kylo to Luke, silently questioning what else she could do. Instead the three of them waited there, Kylo absently rubbing Serela's arm - her head resting on his shoulder.

Sometime in the next hour she and Kylo had fallen back asleep, Ben's body still held securely in her arms. When they woke it was to the sound of the door opening again and Statura entering with Leia, Reha, Finn, and Rey.

"Alright," Statura spoke with his most commanding voice, "We have one hour until dawn. Finn, you'll escort Ren to the main area we'll be leading the ground troops from, Serela and Ben, you'll follow the General to her underground headquarters for safekeeping."

Serela's worried eyed met Kylo's and she laced her fingers into his own. "Be careful," she pleaded, and he answered with a nod.

"You too," he whispered against her forehead as he pressed his lips to it, rising from the bed before bending back down to kiss Ben's forehead too, before leaving Serela with one last, lingering kiss on the lips. With that, he followed Finn, both breaking into a jog as they took the hallway together, anxious to get ready for the fight.

"Come my dear," Leia spoke brightly, trying to fake a positive attitude for her sake. "We'll be fine underground, and the boys can take care of themselves."

It took great effort for Serela to move from her perch on the bed, wishing she could somehow rewind the past few hours and live through them again at least one more time, in case they were actually the last they would ever spend together as a family.

Reha approached Serela with a large swath of fabric, which she explained was a baby wrap meant to help Serela carry Ben for longer periods without tiring her arms so much. After a few minutes of trial and error, they fastened him snugly inside the cocoon it made and Serela felt a comforting warmness in her chest as her baby rested directly next to her heart. Finally ready, their group set off in the opposite direction as Kylo and Finn, filing two at a time down the passages so they wouldn't jostle each other uncomfortably. Leia and Statura took the front, Serela and Reha the middle, with Luke and Rey pulling up the rear. A quick look back at Rey confirmed to Serela that she was just as worried for Finn as she was for Kylo, which gave her a deeper sense of shared camaraderie with the girl. They were friends, yes, both pupils of Luke and bearers of the Force, but more than that, now they were both simply two girls waiting and hoping for their men to come back safely - marching down the hall together towards an uncertain future.

* * *

 _Author's Note: Ok._ _I wasn't expecting to get so in depth with Hux's backstory but after making him so evil I wanted to kind of humanise him a bit (still not an excuse for being a twat, but to help you see more why he is the way he is.) Anyways, the n_ _ext chapter is it. The SHOWDOWN (literally, that's the title). I hope hope hope it will live up to people's expectations and I'm sure there are Star Wars canon purists who read this and tear it apart even though I try very hard to do my research, but it's my fervent wish that the ending to this doesn't feel like some letdown. I'm honestly my own biggest critic (hence why I ask for reviews so much because it just gives me confirmation that what I'm doing isn't just sitting out there wasted) and I'm constantly reading back through my stuff finding typos and trying to change them to make this story better. I'm going to try very hard to make the ending as satisfying as possible for everyone involved, and tie up any remaining loose knots in the epilogue (Thanks Dragonsheartsong for the feedback on that subject)._

 _ALSO, on the same note, I got the sweetest message ever from Megblueyes and it inspired me to crank this out a day faster than I intended. It's very hard as a writer to gauge whether or not your stuff is crap when you get 40,000 views and only 120 reviews, but those of you who continue to leave reviews (and super sweet messages) are what have kept me going. I can't say it enough, I've never written so much on something in my life. I currently have a plot outline in my head for a story involving a character I'm basing off of Domnhall's Gleeson's character Tim in About Time, (it's not fanfic, but I consider it almost my redemptive work for casting him so terribly in this.) It would be set in London (and Domnhall's character would be Irish (duh, like him) who befriends an American girl studying there. Soooo similar in some respects to About Time for sure, but mostly in the sense of having Domnhall Gleeson in a good guy role. I mean, I love Kylo Ren... but I've also got a soft spot for gingers. :P_


	45. XXXXV The Showdown

They had taken refuge deep below the base. Unbeknownst to Serela, there were at least 5 underground levels below the one she had lived on during her time here, and they had taken the stairs down to the very. bottom. one.

Winded already from carrying Ben down so many steps, Serela leaned against the wall of the room they ushered her into and slumped to the floor, giving herself a moment to rest. The others filed in unceremoniously - Statura had left their procession on the main floor, heading for the control room to oversee the defence of D'Qar. First Order storm trooper scouts had already been spotted outside close to the area where Kylo had been abducted. General Hux was not stupid, he knew the Resistance must be close to where they had taken him.

The room they holed up in was little more than 4 stone walls and some chairs around a table. A radio in the wall allowed Leia to communicate back and forth with the control centre upstairs. Rey sat diagonally from Serela and Ben, crossing her legs and leaning against the other wall, assuming a meditative stance against it. Reha took one of the chairs when Luke held it out for her and then seated himself after. They both turned the seats towards Serela, already so exhausted her eyes were shut, trying to soothe the ache of her eyelids that begged her to close.

Staticky voices spoke with Leia back and forth through the rusty old radio, often almost intelligible in their messages, leaving Leia to ask them to repeat 3 or 4 times. Serela nodded off once or twice, lulled by the sound of Ben's even breathing against her chest, her head lolling to the side uncomfortably.

The first tremors of the base shook her awake.

Behind her the wall seemed to lurch against her back with the force of some unseen momentum many hundred feet above them. Her heart gave a turn as she wondered where Kylo was and if he was safe.

The shaking grabbed the attention of everyone in the room, even Rey halted her meditation - they all stared at the walls and the ceiling, then finally the door as if it might fly open at any moment, revealing a troop of First Order officers with blasters pointed and ready.

"This will be the last place they look," Leia spoke, trying to assuage the fears of the other women. Luke sat complacently in his chair, watching their expressions and searching the Force for answers.

"H-How will we know w-when it's safe to go up?" Serela stumbled through her words sloppily, sleep deprivation severely reducing her coherency.

"Hard to say," Leia answered, "But I think it's safe to assume now is not that time."

More vibrations as the walls trembled with the forces that were battling above them. The fear was potent, everyone but Luke looking watchfully from the door to the ceiling when a particularly violent tremor would shake loose a few particles of debris, most of it dust that rained down softly on their heads as they tried to remain calm and avoid imagining the worst.

At first there were multiple communications through the radio for Leia, but as the explosions went on they became more sporadic, and after the first hour they ceased completely. Ben woke and cried and Serela fed him until he slept again, but no new messages came through the rusty speaker. The others remained outwardly calm for Serela's sake, but the claustrophobia began to set in for her and she stood to her feet to begin pacing the floor, desperate for some form of exercise.

"Maybe we should go back up and see what's happened," she suggested frantically, and Leia scoffed, "Hardly, Serela. This is the safest place for us right now and there's no way we would risk Ben's life and yours by going up to where the worst of it is."

"But it-"

Leia held up her hand in a way that bade no disagreement and shook her head, "The answer is 'no'. I know you're worried about Kylo and the others, but putting yourself in worse danger only risks undermining the very thing they're fighting for. We're staying here."

Frustrated but unable to argue, Serela leaned against the wall where Rey had sat perched in her meditation position since they arrived. She thought of sitting back down next to her friend but the idea of trying to get up again kept it from it.

Leia looked distracted, half-sitting on the table's edge and staring at the radio on the wall as if willing it to talk - to deliver a message that would let them know everything was okay. Although judging from the lack of new explosions above them, any assurance of that fact would feel arbitrary until they could see it for themselves.

Serela finally sat in the last empty chair beside her mother, and spoke in a low voice meant only for Luke and her mother, "I just hate sitting here, waiting for something to happen. I feel so helpless, like I'm just down in this room waiting to die with no way to defend myself."

There was a pause, then, "Serela," Luke spoke to her seriously, "Do you still not realise why your mother survived?"

Her face stared back at him blankly, glancing to Reha's before she answered, "...no, she said it felt like she was propelled out the window..."

"Exactly? By what though? Lighting the roof of your house on fire would not have sent her flying perfectly through the only space available to her for an escape."

Serela's thoughts were muddled, her head beginning to ache with exhaustion and trying to understand what he was getting at.

"Serela, _you_ saved your mother. I thought with time you would recognise it yourself but I suppose there has been so much going on you've been too busy to understand it."

It was true, she had not thought twice to question why or how her mother somehow survived what she had been sure was a deathtrap. She had merely accepted it and been grateful for the fact that she was still alive. Now though, when she considered the miraculousness of it, the whole thing did feel unrealistic.

"So I..."

"Saved her, yes. When you watched the First Order fire upon your home, the feelings that welled up inside of you must have found an outlet, even if you did not see it. It's the only explanation for how your mother was sent through the window and landed just perfectly so that she was not harmed," Luke's words emboldened her, and it felt like some of her exhaustion was fading away to be replaced with newfound confidence.

"I saved her," speaking the words out loud strengthened her further, and she looked to her mother to see a grateful smile, eyes watching her daughter in utmost pride.

"So you see," Luke continued, "You're not nearly as helpless as you feel, even before you understood or began to harness your powers. You never have been."

A sound like the groaning of concrete and the screeching of metal outside the door made everyone jump. Ben's tiny voice began screaming in fear, his ears still ringing with the volume of the sounds. Luke and Rey looked at each other, communicating unspoken words as both stood and made for the door.

"Where are you going?" Leia asked agitatedly as Luke waved his fingers and the doorknob turned, swinging the heavy door open on its hinges.

"This is where we leave you and do our best to defend this room from the powers that are on their way seeking to find it," he told her, "In a few minutes you must make for the stairwell. Take it as far up as you can, don't stop for anything, make for the forest as soon as you're clear of the base."

"But-" Leia started to interrupt but was stopped by her brother's next statement, "This entire bunker will collapse soon. The Force has shown that to me. We will do our best to make the way out clear and safe for you, but you must make sure you are not in here when it falls."

Leia spluttered as she tried to find words and Luke's eyes locked onto Serela's, **_Remember what I said. You are not helpless. If and when the time comes to defend yourself and your son, you'll know what to do._**

With that he and Rey left, the sound of their heavy footsteps pounding on the concrete stairs quickly disappearing. Left alone with her mother and Leia, Serela's heart began to pound as she listened raptly for any noise other than the faint hum of the ventilation unit quietly pumping air down to them.

A few minutes passed, still nothing. No sounds from behind the door, no more static or messages from the radio. Ben gave a few shrill whines, and Serela felt it was up to her to lead the pack on their exodus since neither grandmother seemed ready to move.

Leia made a noise of alarm when she saw Serela make for the door, but Reha followed right behind her, trying to smile encouragingly at the general, to persuade her to come with them.

"What if he's wrong?" Leia whispered, and the silence of the room felt suffocating and unbearable as they contemplated the possibility.

Reha spoke for her, "Then we'll cross that bridge when we get there. Come." Her hand stretched out and her palm opened, offering Leia the invitation she apparently needed to overcome her fear and stand to help them pull open the door.

The moment they were through and standing at the foot of the stairs, another tremor shook the stairwell - sending concrete pebbles skittering down the steps and pelting onto their heads.

"C'mon!" Serela ordered over the din of whatever was causing the shaking. Her left hand gripped the railing for safety and the other patted Ben's back as he cried. Together, the three women tread the stairs one at a time, often stopping for another explosion and covering their heads and Ben's from the ensuing rock shower that followed. By the time they crested the 3rd level they were covered in welts that would surely turn to bruises over the next few days. Assuming they lived long enough to see them.

By the second level they could see the damage clearly, walls beginning to crumble and parts of the stairs sagging perilously. Hugging the wall, they each clambered up the remaining flight of stairs as delicately as possible until they could open the door leading to the halls of the medical bay.

Immediately after poking her head outside the door to see if the coast was clear there was a blast close to Serela's face, leaving a sizable hole in the corner of the wall where it struck. Before she knew it Leia sprang from behind her brandishing a blaster of her own and began firing upon the 3 stormtroopers who had been waiting outside the door. "RUN! GO!" Leia shouted, and Reha dragged Serela with her in the opposite direction of the hallway. When they turned the corner on the left Reha tripped over something heavy on the floor and went sprawling, almost dragging Serela and Ben with her. While Reha clambered to her feet Serela surveyed the thing in the floor - a body, slight and frail. Terrified to see who it was but unable to leave without knowing if it was who she suspected, she reached down to turn it face up.

The body rolled over easily enough and Serela gasped, biting back a scream as she saw Kalonia's face- skin bluish purple and mouth slightly agape with a trickle of blood that had dripped from one of the corners, the wound in her stomach red and angry in its severity. The spot on the floor where she had been left face down was smeared with the blood.

"Serela.." Reha started to say, her voice empathetic but anxious. Suddenly behind her daughter Reha spotted two more storm troopers coming down the hall, weapons at the ready.

"Run," Reha whispered, grabbing her daughter's hand and pulling her along. A blast hit the wall close to her mother and another barely missed Serela's back. _Why are they shooting at us when they want Ben?_ Just then the hall gave way to another passage and a door at the end of it. With a speed she didn't know she still had in her, Serela followed her mother and they both darted through the door, finding themselves suddenly outside once again.

Sirens were keening everywhere, as well as the deafening sound of TIE fighters overhead. Smoke rose all around them as they crouched down in the grass and made their way around the base, following the wall and keeping a steady pace, hoping to lose the troopers who had surely followed in the thick smoke. The necklines of their shirts were pulled up so they could breathe through and Serela covered Ben's face with his blanket, grateful somewhat to the sirens and ships for drowning out the sound of his screams. Hopefully no one nearby would be able to decipher one from the other until they were far enough away from danger.

Finally they left the safety of the base's wall only when they reached the end of it. A gaping hole had been left where the cafeteria used to be and the remains of the kitchens and dining hall, black clouds of smog cloaking much of what survived. They made for the woods like Luke had instructed - Serela looking from side to side constantly, her movements jerky as she tried to keep herself together, not wanting to break down in a panic here, when so much was at stake.

 _Kalonia. Dead. Leia. Probably also dead. Luke and Rey. Missing. And Kylo..._

Another blast barely missed her head and instead struck a tree beside her, splintering the bark as she turned to face them. There was barely time to think before she extended her palm and the trooper was sent flying back high in the air and disappearing some place in the smoke they'd left behind near the base. She turned to see her mother holding a weapon unsteadily, hand shaking as she looked to her daughter for confirmation she was okay.

A twig snapped behind them and Reha pushed her daughter aside as she began firing in the direction it had come from, using the damaged tree as a shield.

"Run for it!" she shouted, "Get Ben as far away from here as possible!"

Too tired to argue but too scared to obey, Serela stood there like a log for a moment until she heard the familiar urging of her brain to count to 5.

1... Her mother's sweat-stained clothes were tattered and ragged from all they had endured since leaving the underground bunker, her face now strained in concentration. 2... Serela could see a small grouping of storm troopers just beyond the trees, probably 7 or 8 of them, and all firing on one fixed point: her mother. 3... they were drawing closer, thinking that they had the advantage over this one woman army. Their white masks were coming more into focus. 4... a strange recognisable energy seemed to roll through her arms in a wave and when she lifted her hands their direction she watched as two more on either side of the group went flying back, the bodies that didn't clear the top of the forest instead collided with trees and fell motionless to the ground. 5... her mother was still shooting, but Serela felt her body snap into action as she turned and sprinted in the opposite way, bare feet traipsing the ground as fast as they could manage. The last thing she heard over the bedlam was the robotic voice of a trooper, "We've found her sir, towards the northeast side of the camp!"

Holding Ben tightly to her Serela took off, careening through the forest with all the energy she could muster. Her mother stayed behind, trying to fend off the approaching troopers but how would Serela know if she was safe? How would she know and be able to protect her this time if something went awry?

She had not gotten far when she felt and heard Luke's soothing voice in her mind, this time speaking with urgency, **_Serela, where are you?_**

 ** _I'm in the woods Master, as you instructed._**

 ** _Good. Hux knows you've escaped the base, he's out looking for you. Keeping running east and one of us will find you._**

Before she could ask the question he knew she most wanted to know, Luke answered it for her.

 _ **Kylo is with me, he's safe.**_

That one sentence gave her the internal strength she needed to keep going. Tripping over her feet as she stumbled through the forest, Serela kept looking frantically over her shoulder for Hux's approaching form. Ben was nestled in the sling at her breast, his warm face somehow drawing comfort from the sound of her racing heart, his eyes beginning to droop as if falling back to sleep.

The sound of fighters flying overhead gradually disappeared as she delved deeper into the woods, trying not to trip over any stray roots hidden underneath years worth of fallen leaves. With one hand she cradled Ben's tiny body and the other she held out in front of her as a safeguard to break any potential fall. She kept running until she came to the end of the trees and saw before her the familiar plot of gold. Somehow she had run full circle and reached the wheat field - its stalks rustling in the wind before her. Winded, she leaned against a tree, scraping her forearm painfully against the bark as she tried to catch her breath. Her legs and back ached and she looked at a small outcropping of rocks close to the edge of the field, but still shaded by the trees.

Just as she had thought to sit down and rest for a moment before trying to cross the golden acreage, she noticed the stillness of the woods, and it filled her with trembling. No noise emitted here but the sound of the grains, no birds, no rustling of leaves, just silence.

A pinprick in her mind warned her of the danger just before he appeared from the top of a tall rock in front of her, a blaster in his hand leveled directly at her chest and sleeping child.

"So..." he hissed, and made to climb down swiftly, keeping his weapon trained on her.

 _ **Kylo! Luke! Rey! Someone help me he's here!**_ she cried out through the Force, but she heard no response.

Hux advanced upon her rapidly, stopping his progress about 10 feet away, his eyes surveying her shaking body warily.

"So," he began again, "Here we are at last whore, just the two of us with no one else to interrupt; except your baby of course, but that can be taken care of easily."

In a panic, Serela thrust her arm forward and felt a small burst of power emit from her palm just as Hux's body was thrown backward, landing with a thud in a nearby patch of mud. Horrified, she watched as he picked himself up with no problems, and she saw the awkward angle of his shoulder, clearly disjointed from its original position. Her stomach reeled when he looked at the injury, rolled his eyes and grabbed it with his arm, shoving it back into place with a sickening 'pop' before stooping down to retrieve his blaster.

His characteristic red hair was disheveled, no longer the pristine coiffed wave that she had always seen. It stuck out at odds and traces of dirt and leaves poked from beneath the copper strands, matching the smears of filth all over his face and uniform. Every visible patch of skin looked to be covered in small red scratches, including a particularly nasty gash on the top of his forehead.

"They didn't tell you, did they?" he asked presumptuously, stalking towards her again as she stood rooted to the spot, terrified at what she had just witnessed.

"T-tell me what?" she asked fearfully.

"The First Order," he began to explain, "Has many tricks up their sleeve in the way of science and medicine. That's how we were able to train and control Kylo Ren for so long, to solidify his commitment to the Darkness. It's amazing what we can do with a little time and experimentation in a laboratory. In fact you're looking at our finished product," he stretched out his arms on either side as if showing off a prize.

"You," she said, it was a statement of fact. She was already aware of this, but he didn't know she knew. If she could keep him talking, it might buy her more time.

 ** _Kylo. Luke. Rey. Help me. Please. I'm somewhere in the Eastern part of the woods. Hurry._**

"Yes wench, ME. I was Snoke's most loyal general, it was I who worked tirelessly to build the machine that would turn the course of the Galaxy until we could bend it to our will. I alone who took the steps that Kylo Ren could not, making the hard decisions he was too weak to go through with, and as a reward I have been gifted with limitless power. The same machine used to recondition Kylo Ren has spent the last month hooked into MY bloodstream, pumping MY body full of the darkest concoction we could come up with. My strength," he gestured by kicking over a huge rock to his right as he continued his path towards her, "Is 10x what it was before. My body, as you just saw, is 100x more resilient. No mere cut or fall can ruin me like my feeble human body, I AM the greatest creation the First Order has made. A human in every sense, without use of the Force, but equally as powerful as your precious _Kylo Ren_."

The whole time he had been rehearsing his long lists of accolades he was walking closer to both of them. Now he was here, standing before her breathing his rancid breath in her face again as his fingers closed their way around her neck-gently at first, and she tried to reach inside herself for the power to repel him but came up empty. She had run so far, and slept so little the night before...

"I believe I promised you a bit of fun on my part first before I killed you," his hand at her throat tightened its grip as he stepped closer, the force of his body pressing against Ben waking the infant with a startled cry.

"First things first," he said, trying to figure out how to extricate her baby from the sling, "To get rid of your noisy little bastard."

A feral roar emitted through the air as Serela looked up and saw a black shadow pass overhead, jumping from the tall rocks to the ground below.

Hux's grip lessened as he glanced over in surprise, giving Serela the moment she needed to send him sprawling backward, his body spinning like a top before it hit a nearby tree.

Kylo stood beside her, his chest heaving and his face bare, sweat coating his hair and skin as he gasped for breath, lips sputtering in fury as he looked from her and the baby to Hux's crumpled body miraculously standing to its feet, setting bones back into place yet again.

"Ren," Hux declared, "I wondered when you would join us."

"Did he touch you?" Kylo asked, moving to her protectively and pulling back the sling with his index finger to check on his son.

"Only a little," she replied nervously, watching Hux over Kylo's shoulder

"There's no one else here Ren. Just the three of us and your soon to be dead Chosen One. After I kill you and your son I'll take your whore from every position possible before I dispatch her too, leaving all three of your carcasses here to rot on the forest floor," the man addressing him was so maniacal that Kylo almost had to laugh. Hux's face contorted into grotesque expressions and his voice spit with such ferocity that he looked like a man gone mad, which indeed, he was.

"Stay behind me," Kylo murmured to Serela, crouching into a defensive stance before he answered Hux's taunting, "Come on then you lunatic ginger, let's finish this once and for all."

With a scream Hux lunged forward at them and Kylo bounded towards him, both men raising their lightsabers to strike, the blades meeting in a revolting CRACK as they began to duel.

Serela stayed by the rocks, caressing her frightened son as he wailed his discomfort. Kylo slashed at Hux with every ounce of strength he possessed, fighting not just for himself now, but for his family and their very survival.

Hux met him stroke for stroke. His already amply military prowess was more than a match for anyone before, but now with his heightened speed and strength he was able to go harder, faster and longer- well past the point when most men would tire. In testing his strength on board the Finalizer they had determined that they weren't sure Hux even _had_ a threshold for exhaustion. If so he had yet to reach it. Even though he had run for miles and miles through the forest looking for Serela, he wasn't even winded yet.

Kylo, meanwhile, was beginning to apporach his threshold. He had run all that way _after_ fighting for several hours on the battlefield that had waged outside the base with a clone armies as well as ground troops. He had saved Finn by only a hair's breadth from a blast meant for the back of his head. Awed by the gesture, Finn had given him a meaningful look before recommencing the fighting. Even without saying it, Kylo had been able to read the thought, _You really have changed_.

Now he and Hux were engaged in his most difficult battle yet. Sweat dripped from every pore as they tussled together then broke apart only to repeat again and again. Neither could gain the high ground and neither would concede. The stakes were much too high. Under normal circumstances, Kylo's combination of skill and the Force might have been an easier match for him, but now under such strenuous conditions with hours of energy already depleted from him, it was all he could do to keep up.

And Hux knew it.

At one point Kylo gained the upperhand, closing in on Hux and forcing him to back up, pushing him out of the trees towards the field where they might have a more even playing field on such an open area. Hux realised what he was trying to do and fought back hard, making their progress come to a standstill just as the edge of the forest whilst Serela watched petrified.

Back and forth they went, both gaining and losing leverage in equal message until at last they were almost in the middle of the field. When Kylo finally delivered what he expected to be the winning blow, his lightsaber swung up across Hux's face, much like Rey had that night on Starkiller when she had left Kylo for dead in the snow. Hux had been the one to find him that night, hastily retrieving him on the orders of Snoke before the planet's internal combustion. Now they stood opposed, not that they had even been unified, each baying for the blood of the other for more reasons that either could ever guess.

Hux's face registered his injury, but instead of horror he looked slightly bemused, a trickle of blood running from his left nostril as he swaggered forward a step towards Kylo, taking advantage of this moment when his exhaustion was high and his guard was down- expecting the battle to be over. He had not realised the blade struck Hux's face and not his neck, and the redhead was quick. With one swipe, Hux brought the blade upwards to slice through the tendons and tissues of Kylo's right wrist, severing his hand.

Kylo's scream would haunt Serela for the rest of her life. He dropped to the ground, his dismembered hand at his feet - the fingers still wrapped around the lightsaber's hilt. With a feeble cry, Serela croaked out "Kylo!" as loud as she could, watching in horror as Hux swung back his arm to deliver the final blow.

A force, stronger even than him seemed to halt the procession of his arm on it's descent towards Kylo's neck, and Hux looked at his sword in alarm at the sensation, trying hard to move it but still somehow unable. He had just enough thought to look back towards Serela with a snarl before turning his head to see Kylo eye level with him again, before the red lightsaber now in his opposite hand reached back and swung into Hux's side, cleaving his body in two.

Serela screamed. Ben cried and she ran to Kylo, each step feeling like she was walking underwater and could not reach him fast enough. When she did he was lying on the bent stalks of wheat, breathing heavy and staring up at the sky.

 ** _Master, you have to find us. Hux is dead, but Kylo is hurt. We need your help!_** she pleaded, _**We're in the wheat field, Poe knows where it is**_ , the thought occurred to her that Poe might not want to tell them where the field was, instead preferring to let Kylo die, only to be followed by the thought that Poe might already be dead himself.

There was no answer for several minutes and Serela kneeled over Kylo, weeping and brushing his lanky hair with her fingers as she kissed his forehead and cheeks and whatever else she could find. The ground was soaked in blood from both him and Hux, whose mutilated corpse bled freely into the crisp, clean gold surrounding them.

Kylo's breathing was shallow, but steady when Luke's response finally came. _**We are coming**._

Serela cried her relief into Kylo's shirt and Ben's screeched at being pressed between them, his hands reaching from the confines of his wrap in the direction of his father. Curiously, Serela reached behind her to untie it, extricating her infant son from his makeshift carrier and placing him facedown on his father's chest. Ben babbled and cooed his pleasure, his fine, wispy hair caught in the breeze and tickling his father's chin as he rested his head over Kylo's heart. A strange power seemed to speak to her then, or rather, Serela sensed it although it was not directed at her. Ben's hands, small as they were began to glow from their perch on Kylo's chest, and Serela became overpowered with the same assuring thought that filled her mind to overflowing: **_He will live. He will live. He will live._**

 ** _He will live._**

* * *

 _Author's Note: Okay... how'd I do? What do you think? I expect more reviews for this last chapter even if you've never reviewed before. Was the ending satisfying? Shocking? Shitty? I know people have been baying for Hux's blood since early on so hopefully I gave you a gratifying enough demise for him, as well as retribution for Serela. OF COURSE Kylo had to lose his hand (I'm calling it now: they're going to take his hand in one of the new movies, mark my words) just like his uncle and grandfather. All things considered, coming out of a fight like that with only one missing limb seemed pretty good since Hux def could not say the same thing LOL._

 _I tried to give them a happy ending, but not too happy, but not too sad, etc etc. I've worked SO hard on this guys, you have no idea. Part of me just wants to take a break from writing and read like 10 books without feeling guilty that I'm neglecting finishing a story, but the other part of me is scared to break the momentum and get sucked back into the pattern of putting off writing for another 3-6 months. I'm high on life here just from the fact that I wrote so freaking much. Also, the number of views I've gotten (40,000+) is still staggering to me. I really really REALLY hope since this is the end I'm going to get major feedback from the people who've been reading this through but withholding their opinions. Again, I'm so grateful for the viewers who've been with me basically every step of the way. You forced me to keep going, so well done you. :)_

 _Epilogue will hopefully be up in the next couple of days. Don't expect it to be long, just a short synopsis to let you know the general direction everyone's lives takes from here._


	46. Epilogue

Wind sweeps across the field, sending the wheat undulating in wide waves. Next to the tree, a small house has been built - the wood old and weathered, but tough, the foundation made from the remains of the base destroyed more than 2 years before.

Kylo surveys his handiwork with pride, clapping Finn on the back with his remaining hand in thanks for his help in building it. The mechanical one - a perfect replica of his uncle's - stretches its fingers and lifts to wave at the people standing on the porch. Rey and Serela are in the doorway, looking out to see their men in the field, hands over their eyes to shield them from the sun before Ben comes barreling through the front door to leap off the porch and run to his father, his small toddler legs surprisingly sturdy and they carry him with ease.

All 4 adults laugh and Kylo stoops down to catch him just in time, lifting him into the air and swinging him around in circles, relishing his shrieks of glee. In that moment, the wind caught in his hair and both in plainclothes, they look every bit the image of Han and his son 30 years previous. Serela knows Leia thinks the same thing - she catches her watching them from the corners of her eyes when she comes to visit, sees the way she still holds Ben as reverently in her arms as she did the day he was born, another piece of Han to cherish and protect in his absence.

The house had taken every bit of two years to build. After Hux's death and the arrival of Luke and Poe, rescue crew in tow, a tentative peace had been made. With Snoke and Hux both gone, the First Order was divided and leaderless. It had been easy to use Kylo and Finn to convince more stormtroopers to become defectors, and after trials were held and the few in power too stubborn to relinquish their ties to the First Order had been executed. The Finalizer was landed near the ruins of the base and much of the supplies on board were used in rebuilding it, along with the scrap metal they stripped from it to use in reconstruction, as well as erecting a monument to the lives lost.

Ben grew. When he became old enough to walk, Kylo began to bring his son along with him, balancing him on his knee during meetings and carrying him on his shoulders between the halls. Massive tent compounds were built to house everyone while the base was reconstructed, and the locals began to return in droves once they'd learned that the danger had passed.

There had been a small double wedding soon after, Finn and Rey on one side; Kylo and Serela on the other as Luke officiated. If all that had transpired showed them anything it was that life is short and they needed to seize the day whenever they could.

Poe stood in the front at the wedding, between Leia and Snap and he smiled wistfully, though much of his animosity had abated and he now visited more regularly. His schedule was still full though with training and running drills with the stormtrooper defectors. Although the First Order had been defeated, Leia and the rest of the Resistance knew it was only a matter of time before the Dark Side found another stronghold from which to build up it's power, and they would be ready for it when it did.

Kylo was given a full pardon for his crimes in repayment for his service in the defence of D'Qar. He abandoned his notions of unlimited power under the shadow of his grandfather's dark legacy in exchange for forging a legacy of his own - determined to be a better father to Ben than his father had been to him, and a present husband for his wife. Even without her blood he's become stronger on his own; firm in his resilience. Day and night he worked tirelessly to help Leia and Statura in their relations with the First Order recruits and launching a new government in place of the destroyed Republic. Whenever he was free to bring him Ben tagged along too, his mess of shaggy dark hair bobbing by his father's knees, hand held in his.

Their son and the Resistance have his days, but Serela has him for the nights. She walks out to them in the field now, her swollen belly leading the way and she sees Kylo's look of awe at watching her approach, skin glowing in the sun and hair caught in the breeze, her skirts gently catching in the wheat as she skims her hands over the tops.

When she reaches them Kylo pulls her into his arms, holding Ben between them. He is young still, but already very powerful. Luke has explained what the years have led him to believe: that the old ways of Jedi training were not complete, and perhaps it is not possible to raise a child of such power as wholly Light or Dark. Ben will be a new form of Jedi, a Gray Jedi. Neither all light nor dark, but a healthy mix of both with the mental clarity and restraint to avoid being overtaken with zeal for either. _He will be the One to lead us to the future and whatever it holds_ Luke had said.

Finn smiles at them and crosses the field back to the house to give them some privacy. He and Rey's cabin is almost complete too, and on the other side of the field close to the line with the trees. Already she is beginning to show too, the small bump on her flat stomach a testament to their own hopes for the future. She meets him at the bottom of the porch steps and takes both his hands, kissing him gently. They waited so long for this, all of them, and the beauty of the peace they now enjoy is not lost on any except those too young to remember it any different.

Kylo looks out across the field and feels the breeze, rests his chin on his wife's head and holds his son tighter, his hand stroking the place where their daughter grows, already bursting with life herself as she kicks late into the night, voicing her readiness to come out and see the world she is missing. He smiles as he kisses Serela's forehead for the thousandth time and breathes in a sigh of relief.

There will always be times of peace and war, good and bad, Light and Dark. These opposites have played out for centuries and will continue to do so until the end of all time - but for now, here at home with his family, Kylo knows he has finally experienced the peace that so many people fight the Dark to find again, and he understands that he could never go back. Not ever. This is his peace now, his home and his world. Come what may he will never take that for granted again.


	47. Update

Just wanted to let people know (because I've been asked) that I have no current plans for writing a sequel to either Hunter or the General's Wife at this time. I was recently laid off from my job -_- and I'm trying to motivate myself to work on an original fiction that I mostly put on hold since my miscarriage. I will provide a link here when I begin to post it for those eager to read. Thanks for your continued reviews and support! 3


	48. 2017 Update

Hello my lovely readers, as most of you who read the General's Wife already know, last year ended for me in quite the tragedy but I wanted to share with you all since I still get comments and messages about it, that I recently had a baby boy a few weeks shy of the 1 year anniversary of my life threatening miscarriage. He weighed 7lbs even and his name is Toby. We are completely in love with him and you're welcome to see photos on my instagram re: mofosho318. Thanks so much for all your support and care. I have been writing since my last post but it was a difficult pregnancy and I was not as diligent as I should have been (and not likely to get nearly so much writing done now that he's here) but I hope to update you all with an original work sometime in 2018. Thanks again loves! 3 3


	49. The Last Jedi

Just wanted to check in with everyone one last time before the holidays to wish you a HAPPY LAST JEDI RELEASE DAY.

What were your thoughts/opinions on it? I had to take my newborn with me because he's still too young to be away from me that long (because breastfeeding) so I feel like even though I was watching I missed a lot in my efforts to not let him get too upset and ruin the movie for others. He ended up being a champ most of the way through and we sat in the top left corner so I could nurse him quietly. I feel like I need to watch it 10 more times to let everything really sink in. No promises if I will write another but all I can say is I remember vividly why I wrote a fanfic for both Hux AND Kylo Ren. Dreamy :P

Happy Holidays, leave a comment and let us know what you thought once you've seen it! 3 3


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